Living next door to a toilet

Captain Darling · 07-02-2012 9:18am

FatherLen wrote: »

everytime you hear them taking a dump late at night play a song, preferably one you wouldn't hear often so it would be memorable. only play when they are taking late night dumps but play the same song everytime. they will eventually spot the pattern and realise you know what they're up to and it might deter them to be so loud.

Or every other time they hear that song they sh1t their pants in public.

fonda · 07-02-2012 9:27am

Drill 2 holes in the walls and get 2 glass eyes and tape them to said holes!

No ones gonna take a dump at 1am with 2 eyes staring at them!

If this fails add glow in the dark contacts to the eyes and rewire the bathroom light to your room and then switch it off half way thru their dump!

jester77 · 07-02-2012 9:45am

Stick something like this on the door and write underneath,

"except between the hours of 7:00 - 23:00"

Mr Magners · 07-02-2012 10:04am

later10 wrote: »

That reminds me of the story (possibly urban legend) of a girl who went back to her date's place with him at the end of the night. All goes great, they have an evening of wild, passionate lovemaking. Next morning he wakes her up before he leaves for work, and tells her to let herself out whenever she wants. Just pull the door out behind her. Off he goes.

So the girl gets out of bed and wanders about the house for a bit. Then she feels the need to take a huge dump, which she promptly does.

But there's a problem. Because the poo was soo heavy, it just won't flush. What can she do? No amount of flushing will shift it! She can't just leave it there. He'll never want to see her again.

So -- ever so carefully -- she gets a plastic bag, and gently manipulates the poo into the sack. She then takes it back to the bedroom and puts it on the bed while she brushes her hair and gets dressed for college. She gathers up all her things, walks out of the apartment, pulls the door behind her, quite satisfied with herself. And then the horrible realisation dawns on her.

She has fogotten her sack of shit -- she has just left a steaming, massive poo on the guy's bed. :eek:

Presumably the guy thought she was a total fruitcake for doing such a thing, and neither one ever tried to contact the other again.

That was an ad on American tv for a brand door locks if I remember correctly.

EDIT:Found it...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s-IAerNSs40

later12 · 07-02-2012 11:19am

Ah, kinda thought it was an urban myth alright.

Seriously long ad... but I'd love to see that on Irish tv

The Brigadier · 07-02-2012 11:53am

I believe in Switzerland it is illegal to flush your toilet after 10pm.

Also men can't urinate standing up after 10pm.

It is all to do with noise and respect for neighbours.

Nothingbetter2d · 07-02-2012 12:07pm

TeddyTedson wrote: »

I live next door to a toilet and it's absolutely disgusting. I'm about to go to bed now soon, so there will be total silence while I'm getting to sleep. Then just as I'm drifting off someone next door will slam the door and start having a late night crap. I can hear all the grunting and horrible sounds it's absolute horrendous. They might be in there for over 20mins too.
How do you even bring something like this up with someone? "Oh by the way could you stop taking noisy long ****es at 1AM in the morning please"...:rolleyes:

I've considered getting ear plugs but a lot of pressure builds up or something in my ears then and I get a throbbing pain.
I just can't seem to win.
Anyone else ever have this issue.
At least it's not as bad as when I lived in an apartment briefly where many mornings I was woken by the people next door banging off the headboard. I'll try record it maybe later and upload the sound file so you can hear how loud it is.

sounds you live in a timber framed house... haha