'A gentleman always pays for the first date'

Seomra Mushie

starbelgrade wrote: »

There's very few single women over 30 who don't smell of desperation.

Or cats.

I'm under 30 and I smell of cats. :pac:

seamus

This is After Hours. There is no high road.

Seachmall

seamus wrote: »

This is After Hours. There is no high road.

There was, but it was knocked to build houses for foreign dole-leechers .

Sindri

seamus wrote: »

This is After Hours. There is no high road.

The high road is life, the low road is death and a dried up menopausal 30 year old would certainly be on the low road, on her way to drinking gin in shorts shorts outside shopping centres.

Seomra Mushie

seamus wrote: »

This is After Hours. There is no high road.

Fair 'nuff!

Sindri wrote: »

... and a dried up menopausal 30 year old would certainly be on the low road...

Biology forum is that-a-way >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

:pac:

stupidusername

seamus wrote: »

Her age has nothing to do with it. But there is a direct correlation between age and a woman's level of bitterness.

I'm assuming that her deep bitterness towards men is a function of having reached the landmark age of 30 while single. Most women get through it gracefully. This girl doesn't seem to have. Or maybe she's been bitter a long time.

according to who? I don't even recall seeing that poster mention her age. you're assuming her bitterness has something to do with age, even though you're also saying most women get to 30 without being bitter.

I hope if i'm single in two years my opinion is still valid and not discounted because i'm considered a bitter spinster.

Sindri

stupidusername wrote: »

according to who? I don't even recall seeing that poster mention her age. you're assuming her bitterness has something to do with age, even though you're also saying most women get to 30 without being bitter.

I hope if i'm single in two years my opinion is still valid and not discounted because i'm considered a bitter spinster.

Throw a cat at him.

And then invite him in for tea because of the crippling lack of affection in your life.

And then show him pictures of your trip to Letterkenny. Riveting.

Paddy Cow

stupidusername wrote: »

I don't even recall seeing that poster mention her age.

81 is in her username so the assumption is that is her date of birth.

skregs

stupidusername wrote: »

according to who? I don't even recall seeing that poster mention her age. you're assuming her bitterness has something to do with age, even though you're also saying most women get to 30 without being bitter.

I hope if i'm single in two years my opinion is still valid and not discounted because i'm considered a bitter spinster.

If you're 28 now, you're well on your way to bitter spinsterhood, love

stupidusername

Sindri wrote: »

Throw a cat at him.

And then invite him in for tea because of the crippling lack of affection in your life.

And then show him pictures of your trip to Letterkenny. Riveting.

I don't have any cats though.
and I don't drink tea.
I've never been to Donegal.

what a crap spinster i'll be

skregs wrote: »

If you're 28 now, you're well on your way to bitter spinsterhood, love

huh?

Sindri

stupidusername wrote: »

I don't have any cats though.
and I don't drink tea.
I've never been to Donegal.

what a crap spinster i'll be




huh?

No, I think someone as nice as you'll find that special someone.:)



LOOK OUT YOUR WINDOW... :pac:

St.Spodo

Men paying for women made sense when there was gender discrimination relating to wages. Nowadays I think it's fairer for both sides to assume an equal footing when it comes to relationships.

Katgurl

Seomra Mushie wrote: »

seamus wrote: »

Harsh? Yes. But I don't like seeing such gross inaccurate generalisations of my single brethern. All too often they're the victims of unreastically high standards.

I didn't agree with what she said but, to be honest, what you retorted with wasn't much better. Not better at all, in fact. Quite snide. Seriously, take the high road!

From reading various threads here via the search function, it seems both men and women alike on this site are pretty picky. Not sure there's anything wrong with that either!

In agreement here with seomra, seamus' reply to rose is absolute w@nk despite her posts not being any better.

In my experience anyone who runs down the opposite sex in a general manner (Irish men are spoilt cry babies / girls over 30 are desperate) are invariably the very people that have just never had any success with the opposite $ex and after a lifetime of being spurned have gone on the attack.

If it's because you've always been the resentful tossers youve both turned into then it makes sense that you've never excelled in the art of seduction. If you just are really really unfortunate in the looks department then I feel sorry for you but that's the hand you've been dealt I'm afraid.

Making a bad situation worse with the bitter tantrums seems a bit pointless.

And yeah I know it's AH and not supposed to be taken seriously but the desperation is nearly palpable from those two exchanges.

Seachmall

The sexual tension in this thread is palpable.

Lets all have one big hug, just one big sexy hug.

starlit

I'm not feelin' it though. I Don't feel that kind of tension in this thread though. More like a difference of opinion kind of thing?

Hugs* anyways....awww:o

phoenix833

Whenever I go on a date more often than not I ask for the date so I pay because that's the "rule" I follow. It's nearly caused an argument sometimes but when I suggest they get the drinks then she's happy enough with that.

If there's a second date then we split.

Noreen1

kingtut wrote: »

I can't say I'd ever expect anything buy paying for everything on a first date :eek::eek::eek: believe it or not I'd run a mile if I thought the girl was that easy in the first place

Fair point.
But not everyone is the same. Some girls are only interested in how much a guy spends (:o)(as a woman, these "ladies" make me cringe), and some fellas have unrealistic expectations based on how much they spend.:(.

Just best to play it safe if it's someone you don't know, imo.

Carter P Fly

Her offering to pay is both a test and an incincere attempt to cover the fact that its expected, but its not, but it is.

constitutionus

jaysus dating !

just skip it entirely, get her locked in the pub and avail of the free drink and a ride back at her place.

win win all around.

Raditub

or any other date haha!

RainbowRose81

stupidusername wrote: »

according to who? I don't even recall seeing that poster mention her age. you're assuming her bitterness has something to do with age, even though you're also saying most women get to 30 without being bitter.

I hope if i'm single in two years my opinion is still valid and not discounted because i'm considered a bitter spinster.

It's strange how you decided I am bitter. I find it funny actually, it makes me laugh at the way how some men are. The type I am attracted to is very very rare. I have yet to meet a Irish man who is (a) kind and helpful to others (b) knows how to use their head, intelligent (c) their own person (d) respecful, open minded and has values. I am not asking much just characteristic traits.

I am being labelled 'bitter' because I am talking from my experiences and what my friends are saying. All we do is laugh about them, it's great craic and what is even more funny is that some of my friends met their boyfriends when they actually left Ireland. These a lovely girls, good looking, intelligent and good personality, it's like if they probabaly stayed on here, chances are they would of be still single. One of them is now engaged to an aussie guy.

swimming in a sea

RainbowRose81 wrote: »

It's strange how you decided I am bitter. I find it funny actually, it makes me laugh at the way how some men are. The type I am attracted to is very very rare. I have yet to meet a Irish man who is (a) kind and helpful to others (b) knows how to use their head, intelligent (c) their own person (d) respecful, open minded and has values. I am not asking much just characteristic traits.

I am being labelled 'bitter' because I am talking from my experiences and what my friends are saying. All we do is laugh about them, it's great craic and what is even more funny is that some of my friends met their boyfriends when they actually left Ireland. These a lovely girls, good looking, intelligent and good personality, it's like if they probabaly stayed on here, chances are they would of be still single. One of them is now engaged to an aussie guy.

i think more irish guys would match your a,b,c,d than aussie guys

stupidusername

RainbowRose81 wrote: »

It's strange how you decided I am bitter. I find it funny actually, it makes me laugh at the way how some men are. The type I am attracted to is very very rare. I have yet to meet a Irish man who is (a) kind and helpful to others (b) knows how to use their head, intelligent (c) their own person (d) respecful, open minded and has values. I am not asking much just characteristic traits.

I am being labelled 'bitter' because I am talking from my experiences and what my friends are saying. All we do is laugh about them, it's great craic and what is even more funny is that some of my friends met their boyfriends when they actually left Ireland. These a lovely girls, good looking, intelligent and good personality, it's like if they probabaly stayed on here, chances are they would of be still single. One of them is now engaged to an aussie guy.

Christ, I was standing up for you

c_man

If I'm paying for dinner, then I reserve the right to order for the both of us.

"I'll have the 10oz steak, rare. Thick cut chips, fried mushrooms and onions with that please. She'll have a salad, *looks the date up and down* a small salad. No dressing"

tatumkelly

I must say, I do like a guy to pay for dinner on a first date. I'll happily buy the drinks or whatever after, but I guess I'm a little old fashioned and I go think it's a gentlemanly thing to do. It's a nice touch.

I wouldn't sit and wait for him to pay the bill though. I would offer, and it wouldn't make me think less of him if he let me pay half.

stupidusername

c_man wrote: »

If I'm paying for dinner, then I reserve the right to order for the both of us.

"I'll have the 10oz steak, rare. Thick cut chips, fried mushrooms and onions with that please. She'll have a salad, *looks the date up and down* a small salad. No dressing"

with some diet water

dhayashi

Out of curiosity, how many of ye have actually asked someone out on a date recently? Did you actually apply your principles to said date? Talk is cheap!!!

stupidusername

dhayashi wrote: »

Out of curiosity, how many of ye have actually asked someone out on a date recently? Did you actually apply your principles to said date? Talk is cheap!!!

ahem, I asked someone out a few weeks back, though it wasn't really a date, well as far as I was concerned it was, but he didn't realise. we just took turns in paying for things, I think it was probably fairly even, maybe I spent a bit more, but then on our first date date he sneakily paid for the food we got.

Gummy Panda

starbelgrade wrote: »

There's very few single women over 30 who don't smell of cats.

When I'm single and 30 what will I smell of? :eek::(

RainbowRose81

stupidusername wrote: »

Christ, I was standing up for you

Well you said I am bitter but if it wasn't my age it will be something else they would pick on. They were picking on me because I said I would like to have a cat for a pet. If I said I would like to have a dog, they would think up something else. They are great at sterotyping you.

PhlegmyMoses

I have no problems paying for a meal and would always pay for the girl but it doesn't sit right with me that it's expected of me. If I was going on a date with a girl who gave the impression that there is no way that she would pay for anything, I'd probably not want to see her again. Unless it was Jessica Alba. And even then I'd think she was a bit stingy given the millions she's earned from **** films.

TheZohanS

RainbowRose81 wrote: »

Well you said I am bitter but if it wasn't my age it will be something else they would pick on. They were picking on me because I said I would like to have a cat for a pet. If I said I would like to have a dog, they would think up something else. They are great at sterotyping you.

Fire up an aul photo of yourself 'til we have a look, I guarantee you if you're anyway decent looking at all you'll have a few takers. for what i have no idea

RainbowRose81

TheZohan wrote: »

Fire up an aul photo of yourself 'til we have a look, I guarantee you if you're anyway decent looking at all you'll have a few takers. for what i have no idea

Well If I was looking for someone I wouldn't put a photo up on a web forum, it would probably be the worst thing you could do if you were looking for someone. Anyways I prefer to be on my own. It's much happier.

phoenix833

dhayashi wrote: »

Out of curiosity, how many of ye have actually asked someone out on a date recently? Did you actually apply your principles to said date? Talk is cheap!!!

I did. I was insistant about me paying and she eventually backed down.

Dravokivich

dhayashi wrote: »

Out of curiosity, how many of ye have actually asked someone out on a date recently? Did you actually apply your principles to said date? Talk is cheap!!!

A girl i was out with recently insisted on paying for the first round as she asked me out. I paid for the second round.

Gummy Panda wrote: »

When I'm single and 30 what will I smell of? :eek::(

Cheap whiskey.

Gummy Panda

Dravokivich wrote: »

Gummy Panda wrote: »

When I'm single and 30 what will I smell of? :eek::(

Cheap whiskey.

I can live with that

giles lynchwood

In Thailand a gentleman pay's for every date.:D

Teyla Emmagan

I love a guy paying for a meal on the first date. I find it romantic, and charming - as long as I think I'd like to see him again, that is. I won't let him pay for dinner if I know there won't be a round two. It's not fair to take someone's money and run.

Taking someone's money when you've every intention of sleeping with them is fair game tho IMO.

I'm clearly in the wrong line of work

Ectoplasm

RainbowRose81 wrote: »

It's strange how you decided I am bitter. I find it funny actually, it makes me laugh at the way how some men are. The type I am attracted to is very very rare. I have yet to meet a Irish man who is (a) kind and helpful to others (b) knows how to use their head, intelligent (c) their own person (d) respecful, open minded and has values. I am not asking much just characteristic traits.

Really, very very rare? You've just described character traits that are present in varying degrees in most of my friends. Male AND female.

On topic, if I was invited out by someone, I would probably be surprised if they didn't offer to pay while at the same time never expecting them to. Which sounds oddly contradictory but is true.

I'd be the same with anyone though, date or not - if I invited someone out for a meal and I had selected the restaurant, I would offer to pay. I was once put in the awkward position while in college of having to tell the guy I was with that I couldn't afford to go halves on dinner. I was mortified. He was working, I was still a student and he just hadn't considered that his choice of place was beyond my budget - mostly because it didn't occur to him that I would offer. He expected that he'd be paying. For that reason alone, I think it's important that the person who is choosing the activity be prepared to cover the cost, even if most of the time they won't have to.

boomtown123

This debate is one of the reasons why I hate dates. I'm a girl and I'd prefer to pay halves. I don't like when he pays for everything - I feel stingy if he does.

Scanlas The 2nd

For a man who values his sex life he should try to avoid spending money on women at least initially. It puts you in the provider role which does not turn women on, you don't want to be someone who needs to pay for a woman's time, it's not sexy. Whats sexy is not trying to impress women and being most concerned with your own amusement independent of anyone else's approval. Also leading and taking charge makes it run down their legs.

Teyla Emmagan

Scanlas The 2nd wrote: »

It puts you in the provider role.

No, that also makes it run down their legs TBH. Nice turn of phrase btw :pac:

billyhead

I was on a date last week with a very attractive girl. At the end of the meal, she tried to pay, but I said, I'll get the bill, if you agree to go out with me again. She considered it really sweet so we met up for a second date last night and we split the bill 50/50. I think for the first date the man should offer to pay and then after that split it each way.

Fiona

billyhead wrote: »

I was on a date last week with a very attractive girl. At the end of the meal, she tried to pay, but I said, I'll get the bill, if you agree to go out with me again. She considered it really sweet so we met up for a second date last night and we split the bill 50/50. I think for the first date the man should offer to pay and then after that split it each way.

And will there be a 3rd date?

Scanlas The 2nd

Teyla Emmagan wrote: »

Scanlas The 2nd wrote: »

It puts you in the provider role.

No, that also makes it run down their legs TBH. Nice turn of phrase btw :pac:

Yea that's what women want you to think. Then BOOM..... She bangs some sexy guy with no money behing your back because Money doesn't turn women on. It might get you a girlfriend/wife but their pu$$ies won't be aching to be fukced by you.

billyhead

mrs crilly wrote: »

And will there be a 3rd date?

I asked her out for a 3rd date of which she agreed. I said I would call her next week. Hopefully the fun will happen then:D

Fiona

billyhead wrote: »

Hopefully the fun will happen then:D

I prefer to get all the formalities out of the way on the first date, means you know what your dealing with

Carlos Orange

boomtown123 wrote: »

This debate is one of the reasons why I hate dates. I'm a girl and I'd prefer to pay halves. I don't like when he pays for everything - I feel stingy if he does.

I wouldn't really class this as a debate. Highlights so far :



I would never date a man who didn't pay for the first date because going 50/50 makes him a friend.

The only people who have ever paid for my dinner are my mum and the company I work for. Neither of these seem like healthy models for a relationship.


Men should pay because they asked me out. Btw I never ask guys out because rejection is awful.

Awesome,men take the risk of rejection and get to pay for it.

Fiona

psinno wrote: »

I wouldn't really class this as a debate. Highlights so far :



I would never date a man who didn't pay for the first date because going 50/50 makes him a friend.

The only people who have ever paid for my dinner are my mum and the company I work for. Neither of these seem like healthy models for a relationship.


Men should pay because they asked me out. Btw I never ask guys out because rejection is awful.

Awesome,men take the risk of rejection and get to pay for it.

If I was a bloke and I knew that about you I wouldn't even take you out on the date!

We are in a recession, I would not feel comfortable with a bloke spending €80/100 on a dinner for us cos money is tight for everybody.

And I would never not ask a bloke out for fear of rejection, that's just silly! So what if they don't want to have dinner with you. I reckon it's cause you don't want to get hit with the bill :rolleyes:

darlett

whatsamsn wrote: »

Only problem is you dont know for sure you'll be getting any :pac:
Even if a girl agrees before hand to going to a pub then back to yours. You dont know if that will pan out. Many a man has been dooped.

'No taters 'til laters'. You know it makes sense!