Did you ever get caught fapping by your parents/friends/other?

Seachmall

jester77 wrote: »

No joy

Sorry, man.

Maybe someday, hopefully.

smash

Can't remember if I was ever caught fapping but my mother woke me one morning when I was 17 and ordered me to dispose of the used condom on floor in the living room.

AeoNGriM

kfallon wrote: »

No!

I was good at it

How does being good at fapping prevent you from getting caught? I can **** the nipple clamps off a transexual hermaphrodite without spilling my tea but unfortunately that won't bend light around me and make me invisible should someone glance in my direction.

davet82

John Doe1 wrote: »

I stared her straight in the eye and said "this ones for you"








not reeally

seriously funniest post ever :D:D that made my day lmao

John Doe1

davet82 wrote: »

seriously funniest post ever :D:D that made my day lmao

_Thanks i try my best:p

kfallon

AeoNGriM wrote: »

How does being good at fapping prevent you from getting caught?

I was good at not getting caught fapping......obviously! :rolleyes:

Jesus wept, some people you have to explain everything to!!!

CroatoanCat

<OT> Today in work I was reading about a thing called a four-area project - FAP for short </OT>

I once had a great fap in the jax in college. Many moons ago. Came out refereshed to find the place deserted and the security guys looking at me curiously. 'Twas then I clocked the sound of the fire alarm. "Where were you?", asked me pals. "On the top floor, looking for the dean", says I. When really I was in the bog, flicking the bean.

Glory days.

MsLaura

I caught my mom frigging my dad, does that count?

John Doe1

MsLaura wrote: »

I caught my mom frigging my dad, does that count?

Banned

smash

John Doe1 wrote: »

Banned

That was a few days ago!

MsLaura

John Doe1 wrote: »

Banned

Must be an elastic one, cause I'm still here

stovelid

Didn't any of you have bolts on your bedroom door like normal self-respecting, parent-loathing teenagers?

SheFiend

I got caught too many times to mention. One of the wierdest was when I thought I had the house to myself all day, and raided the fridge for slimy stuff to play with. Heard the door open and close, before I could look around. By the time I done a quick mop of the kitchen floor and legged it i realised my brother was standing outside the door, in the garden, like a statue. To this day, I can still feel that wedge of discomfort between us.

Funglegunk

Sindri wrote: »

Heard a psychologist say once all men go through a phase of sexual addiction in their lives at some stage.

Yep, it's called adolescence.

Gannicus

CroatoanCat wrote: »

"On the top floor, looking for the dean", says I. When really I was in the bog, flicking the bean.

Glory days.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EDE_nVJcJ70

corktina

you are all going to go blind.....:cool:

(I always close one eye just in case....sorry i mean i USED to always close one eye just in case...;)

wilkie2006

castletownman wrote: »

My mates told me about the **** technique where if you sit on your arm first it feels like someone else is doing it. I went home after school that day and went upstairs to my room to try it. In the eh....throes of passion....one of my friends walked in and I rather stupidly tried to push down the laptop screen with my limp hand, which was, as you can imagine, impossible to do. Mortification.

Wow, that must've been embarrassing but hilarious, just like in The Inbetweeners?

Hmm, I think that this thread might require a bull$hit detector...

TheBody

Has anyone had a shank? It's where you **** and **** at the same time!!

Teyla Emmagan

I was caught once. Would have cottoned on that someone was shouting and the bathroom door was being jimmied open if I hadn't had my head underwater at the time...

True story

Dr.Winston O'Boogie

Caught by my dad once, I was home from school and upstairs fapping, door closed. He came home from work, I heard him come upstairs but honestly didn't think he would come in without knocking.

Anyway he came in (never found out why). I jumped up and pulled my school trousers up and quickly did the zip. Only problem was my boner hadn't gone down quick enough and was protruding out the fly, I nicked my mickey in the zip and let out a yelp just as he did a u-turn (presumably after realizing what I had been doing).

He must have known what I had just done, had to of heard the yelp...but choose to ignore it as re-entering the room would have just increased the embarrassment for both of us. Thank fook nothing was caught in the zipper though or else I would have to cry for help properly a la Something About Mary.

We never spoke of the incident again needless to say. "Boys will be boys".

idunnoshur

One day when I was studying for the Leaving cert my mind started to wander so I said I'd give the lad a tug so I could get back to concentrating on the study. Any way I was tipping away at him and the mother walked in and out again straight away, needless to say the lad calmed down straight away but i couldn't do any more study. Thank fcuk the mother didn't mention it ever.

newmug

Sindri wrote: »

Gawd no, I had a full proof system. I was close once with a face full of make-up thrashing it out to some 'kinky' shit on the computer downstairs. Any one could've walked in but I suppose part of me wanted to get caught...

You fapped while wearing make-up?????

Carlos_Ray wrote: »

Possibly the most embarrassing moment of my life. Years ago I was tugging away in a standing position with my trousers around my ankles, sweating profusely, trying not to end it too quickly. It was late at night and I was being really quiet, didn't want to wake the folks up. I threw my head back and closed my eyes and decided to work the bum with my free hand. When I opened my eyes.....

And you "worked your bum"? What, like hand on arse swivelling your hips, or finger exploration?

Sindri

newmug wrote: »

You fapped while wearing make-up?????

Yes, during my wilder sexual awakening days. I've done some pretty weird sexual ****, seeing as I'm a deviant. Used to knock one out 4 or 5 times a day.

I have some serious issues. Conventional sex just doesn't appeal to me any more.

Intensive Care Bear

Never got caught fapping, i'm an expert, however years ago i got caught by my house mate getting a blow job of my missus, i had to dive across the sitting room like superman with no pants on to try and slam the door, ha ha we never mentioned it.

44leto

I just google fapping, and nah, never caught, I once slept in a dorm and i learned how "fapp" without moving a sheet, none of the other bastards did. The bloke on my bottom bunk use to make me seasick.

Sindri

44leto wrote: »

I just google fapping, and nah, never caught, I once slept in a dorm and i learned how "fapp" without moving a sheet, none of the other bastards did. The bloke on my bottom bunk use to make me seasick.

That is fascinating. Do go on.



*fap*:pac:

44leto

Sindri wrote: »

That is fascinating. Do go on.



*fap*:pac:

I think I said it all, I fap therefore i am male.

Sindri

44leto wrote: »

I think I said it all, I fap therefore i am male.

Just one more post and I'll have finished up...ah nearly there...What are you wearing?

wilkie2006

TheBody wrote: »

Has anyone had a shank? It's where you **** and **** at the same time!!

That'd have to be a pretty long $hit or pretty quick ****

newmug

Anyone know what a tactical fap is?;)

mattjack

newmug wrote: »

Anyone know what a tactical fap is?;)

When you "fap" with one eye closed ?