3 year old in mam and dads bed!!

daludo

hi folks,
our 3 yr old girl has got into a habit of leaving her own bed every nite and wandering across the hall into ours.usually between 12 and 2am,different excuse every nite!!how the hell do we get her to stay in her own bed??have tried everything but to no avail,any similar experiences out there or advice?????:(:(

Daffodil.d

daludo wrote: »

hi folks,
our 3 yr old girl has got into a habit of leaving her own bed every nite and wandering across the hall into ours.usually between 12 and 2am,different excuse every nite!!how the hell do we get her to stay in her own bed??have tried everything but to no avail,any similar experiences out there or advice?????:(:(

It's a hard one. Easy to get into that routine. Maybe try saying how about I go into your bed instead and then sneak back when she falls back to sleep. Our 2 wear old likes to try get into our bed when he's goin to sleep, we just move him when he's asleep

simply simple

my 3 year old girl used to do the same some time ago,but what we did was say no at night when she came to our bed and instead said she could sleep with us in the morning before getting up,so she will be on our bed for about half hour everyday in the morning before we get up..we have also offered her to sleep with us on our bed every friday if she sleeps in her bed all other days without crying or making a fuss,works very well for us and our sweetie

the_syco

Maybe put a hot-water bottle into her bed beforehand? It could be just that her bed is colder than yours? Lidl had these awesome hot-water bottles that fitted into a stuffed animal teddy - http://www.aldi.ie/ie/html/offers/special_buys3_19773.htm I got a "lion" one to put next my feet as they'd be cold at night during the cold spell ^.^ but you may be able to get something like them in Argos?

angeldaisy

My little boy used to do that, and as much as I loved having him snuggled in bed with me, I used to pick him up and put him straight back into his own bed with the promise that he could come in in the morning for cuddles. At the start it might take a few attempts before he would stay in his bed but it wasn't long before he stopped it. Now he's 6 and if he wakes in the night, usually because he thinks its morning, he is told to go back to bed and he does with no arguments.
Its not easy but unless you want to be sharing a bed with a wriggly, squirmy bigger child - who usually sleeps glued to your back (this is what its like now - if he's sick he sometimes sleeps with me), its worth the effort now.

ash23

In my experience it will take a few nights of just taking her straight back to her own bed over and over and over and over again

It sucks because it's so much easier to let them in and everyone gets to fall back to sleep but if it's something you aren't happy about then you just have to keep getting up and putting her back. No talking to her, no cajoling her, just get up and lead her back to her room.
It might take 50 times the first night, but eventually she'll get the idea that she is not going to win this battle and she'll give up.
You need to persevere though because it will only take one time to end up back at square one.

Ludo

Tough one alright. One of our 4 year olds does this practically every night. I spent 2 nights last week putting him back in his own bed repeatedly. Took about 3 hours each night. Third night I was so shattered that I didn't wake when he came in. The wife let him straight into our bed...back to square one :mad:

goingforward

We have a second bed in our room for our boys. The six year old went into his own room for a few months last summer but moved back in with us when it started getting dark and windy. The night time is scary for children and I think it's mean to make them sleep alone when they are so young.

How many of you sleep by yourself at night?

angeldaisy

goingforward wrote: »

How many of you sleep by yourself at night?

Oh how I dream of that:D no snoring, duvet stealing OH in the bed and having to keep avoiding elbows:eek: I'd have no bother whatsoever sleeping by myself!!

unkel

goingforward wrote: »

We have a second bed in our room

Ideal compromise. Tell your child that if they don't want / are too scared to sleep in their own room, feel free to move into the spare bed in the parents bedroom. As long as they don't wake us up.

I only wish our bedroom was big enough for having a second bed in it...

We're in the Dublin area and not millionaires, so unfortunately that's not an option...

the_syco

Ludo wrote: »

:mad:

Do you and the wife like curry? I doubt the child will want to stay in the same room, let alone the same bed as ye once the farting begins :pac:

ash23

goingforward wrote: »

We have a second bed in our room for our boys. The six year old went into his own room for a few months last summer but moved back in with us when it started getting dark and windy. The night time is scary for children and I think it's mean to make them sleep alone when they are so young.

How many of you sleep by yourself at night?

I do.
I'm on my own in my room and my daughter is by herself in another.
It's not "mean" to make her sleep on her own. You do what works for you but I'll do what works for me.

Moonbeam

It is in no way mean making a child over 1 sleep in their own room at night.

My suggestion is put him to bed,read him a story,snuggle him down and leave the room. If he likes music maybe put a cd player in his room to listen to music.No TV in his room.

If and when he comes in to you,move him back to his own bed.

If is easy for me to say these things because I don't have the issue though.

There is no way I would give him a bed in my room unless it was a 1/2 bedroom house with no where else to sleep.

Tabnabs

We've just overcome this problem with our 2 year old. I broke all the parenting rules and ultimately told him a story that scared him into breaking out of the routine. As it was so cold a couple of weeks ago, I told him Jack Frost would get him if he caught him out of his bed (and would do the same to Mum or Dad if he caught them). The safest option was to stay snug and warm in his own bed and wait for morning to get up again. Now all three of us sleep soundly through the night...

Boom_Bap

We had the same problem but managed to sort it out. Our young lad now wont even get out of his bed in the morning unless he gets permission! He didnt learn the permission thing from us, just something he started doing himself.

Like Tabnabs, we broke parenting rules but only for a few days.

The first night we decided to get him back to his own bed, i brought him in a few times, and I got very tired and was looking for a quick fix. So I promised him that if he stayed in his own bed all night, he would get a 'Jelly Snake' in the morning. We never give him sweets unless a special occasion, so he seen this as an easy oppertunity to get sweets. He stayed in bed all night. In the morning he got a 'Jelly Snake' after his brekkie.
The next night when he came in, I just had to say Jelly Snake and he went back to bed. Same for the next few nights and he eventually stayed in bed all night and in the morning asked for his Jelly Snake.

After about 2 weeks he stopped asking for Jelly Snakes.

http://www.naturalconfectionery.ie/jelly-snakes.aspx

cynder

I sometimes sleep with the kids, with my eldest she was in my bed till she was 6, my boys flitter in and out and sometimes i go in their rooms, teh older they get the better they get, they are now 5 and 6. they only really sleep with me now when they are sick or the little guy wets the bed.

Moonbeam

Boom_Bap wrote: »

We had the same problem but managed to sort it out. Our young lad now wont even get out of his bed in the morning unless he gets permission! He didnt learn the permission thing from us, just something he started doing himself.

My big girl was just gone 2 when I moved her in to a big girl bed and she was the same would not leave her bed until I told her it was ok. Se took me literally that she can't get up;)
About 6 months on that was cure because she would get up to check on her baby sister.

marley123

I went through a stage of this when I was about the same age... So what my Mum & Dad did was not give me any room to sprawl & kinda squish me so I would get too warm after a couple of times of getting too hot & going back to my own bed that was it.:)

BostonB

We redecorated and got them a new bed and covers. That helped them want to stay in their own room much more.