Father Ted

cloud493 · 24-02-2012 12:14am

What the hell was wrong with that episode?

micropig · 24-02-2012 2:50am

Father Noel Furlong: Room for two more in the St, Lukes youth group?...Ted will you sing us a song, he has a great voice, a bit like Celine Dion ..........................................Some of us over did it down the old local last night, Gerry fields knows what I on about eh? We arrived back at what have been half ten..and some of us crawled in Janine Reilly knows what I talking about. She wasn't the only one, Tony lynch! Look at him there all sweetness and light, He wasn't when he crawled in at ten past the eleven!!

To Dougal: What age do you think I am go on guess
Dougal: 40?

Father Furlong: Where's Tony Lynch off to, Probably to get some heroin
Tony Lynch: No, I'm just going to the toilet father

Best episode ever

Fiona · 24-02-2012 9:52am

Fr Ted rocks

BBDBB · 24-02-2012 10:49am

ahh I love saying Mass

podgemonster · 24-02-2012 11:36am

Dougals doing a funeral? YOU LET DOUGAL DO A FUNERAL!!!!!!!!

HAAA! HAAA! · 24-02-2012 11:43am

What are we watching? :cool:

- Its the sports day

Lots of young fella's running around in shorts
Thats the kind of thing you're into isn't it.
Only you're probably thinking about them with no shorts.

YEH DIRTY FECKER :cool:

Aglomerado · 24-02-2012 12:44pm

Wait a minute!!!

Those are FAKE HANDS!

Bad Panda · 24-02-2012 12:53pm

BraziliaNZ wrote: »

It was funny when I was 16 or however old I was when it came out, now it just looks terribly dated and awful and unfunny to me. The jokes are so cheap and obvious half the time. Am I the only one who thinks this?

I think that's part of the charm with 'Father Ted'. It shouldn't be funny, but it is at times. I think because they actors could just pull it off most of the time.

I love watching it. It is however insanely overrated by Irish people. It's like it's been elevated to this 'genius' status as we don't really have any other decent comedy.

HalloweenJack · 24-02-2012 1:25pm

Graham Norton's character was brilliant, especially anytime he showed up with his youth group.

Probably my favourite bit in the whole series is the one where they all get lost in the cave and he starts singing 'Bohemian Rhapsody'. Then after Ted stops him, he launches into a long, colourful description of how they'll have to eat each other to stay alive if noone comes to rescue them. He goes on to say how he'll end up eating Tony and how he'd have to hide at Tony's funeral. Tony explodes at him and the look on Graham Norton's face is priceless but then he comes out with this gem
"Well... well, I never... I never... Tony, I'm putting you on my list of enemies! [He takes out a notepad and scribbles something on it] There! You're in for it now, Tony! HA! Only kidding! Look what I've really written!"

He shows the notepad and it's got 'I REALLY LIKE TONY!' written on it.

Also, another classic quote: "It's Ireland's biggest lingerie section, I understand."

micropig · 24-02-2012 1:36pm

Benny_Cake wrote: »

DOUGAL: I think...I think...I think I have a lyric!

TED: Right, lyric, go ahead there Dougal.

DOUGAL: What's it called again?

TED: "My Lovely Horse."

DOUGAL: Right. How about this: "My lovely horse, I want to hold you so tight, I want to rub my fingers through your tail and love you all night."

TED: Dougal, Dougal, Dougal, stop there. We want to keep out of the whole area of actually being in love with the horse.

DOUGAL: Oh right, right.

TED: It's more that we're friends with the horse, that we want to jump around with it and, you know, just have a good laugh with it.

DOUGAL: Right. What about something like, eh, "Take this lump of sugar baby, you know you want it"?

Ted:Just play the f*cking note,

Dougal: Which Note?

Ted The first F*ucking note!!

Topper Harley · 24-02-2012 9:16pm

micropig wrote: »

Ted:Just play the f*cking note,

Dougal: Which Note?

Ted The first F*ucking note!!

No not the ****ing first one! The ****ing first one's already ****ing down! Just play the ****ing note you were ****ing playing earlier! I've been playing the ****ing first one! We have the ****ing first one!.... Just play the ****ing note you were ****ing playing there! ****ing what you were just ****ing doing! Play the ****ing note!

T0mmyM wrote: »

Ah feck it....Fed up with briiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick!!!!

I love my brick.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLKvponqV4Q

micropig · 24-02-2012 9:19pm

Topper Harley wrote: »

No not the ****ing first one! The ****ing first one's already ****ing down! Just play the ****ing note you were ****ing playing earlier! I've been playing the ****ing first one! We have the ****ing first one!.... Just play the ****ing note you were ****ing playing there! ****ing what you were just ****ing doing! Play the ****ing note!

Wait, I can get this bit.....................................................:(

susita06 · 24-02-2012 9:28pm

I love my brick

bazza1love · 24-02-2012 9:43pm

Hi if you have a windows phone check out my "Craggy Island" app http://www.windowsphone.com/en-IE/apps/54824508-2ed0-484b-b83c-1cd79ed5f7a5

micropig · 24-02-2012 9:53pm

bazza1love wrote: »

Hi if you have a windows phone check out my "Craggy Island" app http://www.windowsphone.com/en-IE/apps/54824508-2ed0-484b-b83c-1cd79ed5f7a5

midlandsmissus · 24-02-2012 10:11pm

Alan: Should I call the police, Father?
Father Ted: No. He's lost the trust of his sheep. That's punishment enough for a farmer who deals primarily...with sheep.

Bruthal · 24-02-2012 10:14pm

Ted: Do ye know what this is like? A plague, a big rabbit plague.
I wonder if God is punishing us.
Maybe because I said feck to Bishop Brennan.

Doughal: If he'd send a plague of rabbits for saying feck to Bishop Brennan, imagine what he`ll do when he finds out about that money you stole from that charity?

Ted: Dougal, that money was just resting in my account before I moved it on.

micropig · 24-02-2012 10:22pm

robbie7730 wrote: »

Ted: Do ye know what this is like? A plague, a big rabbit plague.
I wonder if God is punishing us.
Maybe because I said feck to Bishop Brennan.

Doughal: If he'd send a plague of rabbits for saying feck to Bishop Brennan, imagine what he`ll do when he finds out about that money you stole from that charity?

Ted: Dougal, that money was just resting in my account before I moved it on.

Father Dougal: It's like a big rabbit rock festival!
Father Jack: (points at rabbits) Rats!
Father Ted: Yes father, we can see them as well.
Father Jack: Hairy Japanese bastards!

Father Ted: Because Dougal, my nerves are shot. I won't be able to relax until the only rabbit here is the one sitting in your head working the controls.

Father Dougal: Will I put on the kettle?
Father Ted: Go on then.
Father Dougal: ...must be one of those ones that clicks off automatically.
Father Ted: Mmm...bit of steam there. Incidentally, did you bring any teabags?
Father Dougal: ...no.

micropig · 24-02-2012 10:33pm

Bruthal · 24-02-2012 10:41pm

micropig wrote: »

Father Dougal: It's like a big rabbit rock festival!
Father Jack: (points at rabbits) Rats!
Father Ted: Yes father, we can see them as well.
Father Jack: Hairy Japanese bastards!

Father Ted: Because Dougal, my nerves are shot. I won't be able to relax until the only rabbit here is the one sitting in your head working the controls.

Father Dougal: Will I put on the kettle?
Father Ted: Go on then.
Father Dougal: ...must be one of those ones that clicks off automatically.
Father Ted: Mmm...bit of steam there. Incidentally, did you bring any teabags?
Father Dougal: ...no.

Ted: Did you bring the travel scrabble Doughal?

Doughal: I brought the travel scrabble, and the normal scabble. The travel scrabble for when we were travelling, and the normal scrabble for when we arrived.

Ted: Good man

Doughal: A no.. wait a minute, now that i think of it, i didnt bring either of them. God im an awful eejit.

micropig · 24-02-2012 10:48pm

robbie7730 wrote: »

Ted: Did you bring the travel scrabble Doughal?

Doughal: I brought the travel scrabble, and the normal scabble. The travel scrabble for when we were travelling, and the normal scrabble for when we arrived.

Ted: Good man

Doughal: A no.. wait a minute, now that i think of it, i didnt bring either of them. God im an awful eejit.

Father Ted: Dougal! Have you been drinking?
Dougal: I have, Ted! I've been drinking like a mad eejit! No, no, oh wait! (gives a drawn-out wink to Father Stack) No I haven't!
Father Ted: Dougal, I'm ashamed of you.
Dougal: (shakes Ted) Ted, Ted, Teddy, Ted, Ted. Come here Teddy, Teddy, Ted, Ted, you're my best friend. God I love being a priest. We're all going to heaven lads, waheyy.

kojack · 24-02-2012 10:54pm

Have you seen the damage a bomb could do father? Twill blow your face into the side of tree

df1985 · 24-02-2012 10:58pm

get your bollox out of my face!

micropig · 24-02-2012 10:58pm

kojack wrote: »

Have you seen the damage a bomb could do father? Twill blow your face into the side of tree

Father Ted: There was a time when the police in this country were friends of the church; speeding tickets torn up, drunk driving charges quashed, even a blind eye turned to the odd murder!

Bruthal · 24-02-2012 11:06pm

micropig wrote: »

Father Ted: There was a time when the police in this country were friends of the church; speeding tickets torn up, drunk driving charges quashed, even a blind eye turned to the odd murder!

Anyway Fr, im really looking forward to your entry

micropig · 24-02-2012 11:07pm

robbie7730 wrote: »

Anyway Fr, im really looking forward to your entry

Father Ted: Oh God...
Father Dougal: Dick said it was an extra-special forfeit, because you were such a big cheatin' bastard.
Father Ted: All right, open it, open it! The tension is killing me!
Father Dougal: Ah don't worry Ted, he probably just wants you to clean his car or some...
Father Ted: What is it!? Break it to me gently!
Father Dougal: All right. [reads] Ted. By this time next week you have to...
Father Ted: What?
Father Dougal: You have to...
Father Ted: What!? [snatches the letter off Dougal, reads it, horrified] Kick Bishop Brennan up the arse!

Bruthal · 24-02-2012 11:31pm

Its still funny looking at all them quotes, it was a work of genius.

micropig · 24-02-2012 11:35pm

robbie7730 wrote: »

Its still funny looking at all them quotes, it was a work of genius.

Father Ted: The way I feel now...I could convert gays!

Dougal: Now you're going to tell us you're Santa or something!
Ted: No, I... I'm the opposite to Santa.
Dougal: What, the anti-Santa?!

Mrs Doyle: Do you think our new guest would like a cup of tea Father? The little sheep fellow. (laughs simperingly)
Father Ted: I don't think they drink tea Mrs Doyle. Not unless you have some sheep tea (laughs)
Mrs Doyle (suddenly serious): Yes.
Father Ted (taken aback): What?
Mrs Doyle: Yes, we do have some sheep tea.
Father Ted: Oh. Well... you'd better... give him some of that, then.
Mrs Doyle (overjoyed): Okay so!

Bruthal · 24-02-2012 11:43pm

micropig wrote: »

Father Ted: The way I feel now...I could convert gays!

Dougal: Now you're going to tell us you're Santa or something!
Ted: No, I... I'm the opposite to Santa.
Dougal: What, the anti-Santa?!

The whole gay thing, I suppose it's a bit of a puzzle to us all. It must be fun though. Um, not the you know, but eh, the nightclubs and uh, the whole rough and tumble of homosexual activity. You know, having boyfriends when you're a man,,,, Anyway, don't mind what the church thinks, it used to think the earth was flat. It's like, you know, sometimes the Pope says things he doesn't really mean, you know? We all get things wrong, even the Pope

kojack · 24-02-2012 11:48pm

I love that Eurosong episode. Especially Fred Rickwood who is backstage all scruffy, not shaved and makes no sense when talking. He comes out on stage then make up on clean shaved, hair slicked.

What a pro!

Father Ted

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