Too young for sleep routine?

whitelightrider

Folks,

Our little one is 7 weeks tomorrow and currently sleeps on me.
I'm just wondering if it's too early to try and get her to sleep in her own cot beside our bed? Just want to get a little sleep routine going.

Mimikyu

This post has been deleted.

Lola92

I don't think its too early to introduce a going to bed pattern (eg. bath, change, dress, feed, wind, bed) or something along those lines. At that age they can still be very unpredictable with their sleep patterns so don't expect any miracles! They should also be fed on demand so I wouldn't really try to be stretching out feeds yet.

For what its worth I spent a lot of the first couple of months awake at night because my daughter woke going down into a cold moses basket/cot when she wanted to be asleep warm and close to mammy and daddy. I breastfed so co-sleeping made a lot of sense for us, I just wish I realised it sooner instead of worrying about what was expected - baby to sleep in a cot!

foodaholic

Lola92 wrote: »

For what its worth I spent a lot of the first couple of months awake at night because my daughter woke going down into a cold moses basket/cot when she wanted to be asleep warm and close to mammy and daddy.

I bring a hot water bottle with me to bed - when I take my daughter out to feed her I put the hot water bottle in her Moses basket to keep I warm for her - as I was having the same problem of putting her back into a cold basket.

Lola92

foodaholic wrote: »

I bring a hot water bottle with me to bed - when I take my daughter out to feed her I put the hot water bottle in her Moses basket to keep I warm for her - as I was having the same problem of putting her back into a cold basket.

I resorted to that for a while, she grew out of it quickly though. She would happily sleep anywhere now at almost 15months!!

OP there is no harm in giving the cot a go it that is what you want to try. If it's not working out you could always leave it another couple of weeks and try again then

henlee

Hi,

My baby is 13 weeks and I didn't push a sleep routine but he has settled into it himself really and sleeps from 8pm to 7 pm waking for a feed at 11pm. now in saying that more often than not he will wake up for some reason or another at 4am! your baby is still very young so I wouldn't be too worried about it.

ceadaoin.

whitelightrider wrote: »

Folks,

Our little one is 7 weeks tomorrow and currently sleeps on me.
I'm just wondering if it's too early to try and get her to sleep in her own cot beside our bed? Just want to get a little sleep routine going.

Our little girl was the same. She would only sleep on one of us or in her swing chair and eventually we decided enough is enough. At around 6 weeks we just started putting her in her cot when she got sleepy after the 7pm or 8pm feed. The first time she woke up crying a good few times but we just persevered, comforting her and then putting her back down when she stopped crying. Gradually she woke up less and now she usually has a good 5 or 6 hour stretch after we first put her down.

I think it's important to get her in the cot soon, otherwise it will be much harder to do it once she gets older and is stuck in the habit of sleeping on you!

whitelightrider

Hey folks,

Thanks so much. As much as it pains me we're going to give the cot a try. I love her sleeping on me but to be honest she's getting big and Im not sleeping at all. I spend my time looking at her. She's amazing!!

So my wife and I are going to give the routine a shot. Bath, change, feed, wind, cot. Can I ask if any of you had problems with your baby crying when you put them down, and what you did when this happened? Did you leave them to cry, pick them up, etc?

Many thanks folks. Id be so lost without this forum!!

annamcmahon

My daughter cried if she was put down in her cot while wake. We picked her up immediately and waited until she was at least almost asleep and tried again. We might have had to do this quite a few times, 10 or more, initially but I think it paid off in the long run because after about a week or so she didn't cry. Even people who advocate leaving a baby to cry don't recommend it before 6months as babies younger have no concept of time. Someone put it really well on another forum, you wouldn't leave your wife crying if a hug would make her feel better so why do it to a baby.
We used a very gentle modified pick up put down technique that I can post if you like.

whitelightrider

annamcmahon wrote: »

My daughter cried if she was put down in her cot while wake. We picked her up immediately and waited until she was at least almost asleep and tried again. We might have had to do this quite a few times, 10 or more, initially but I think it paid off in the long run because after about a week or so she didn't cry. Even people who advocate leaving a baby to cry don't recommend it before 6months as babies younger have no concept of time. Someone put it really well on another forum, you wouldn't leave your wife crying if a hug would make her feel better so why do it to a baby.
We used a very gentle modified pick up put down technique that I can post if you like.

Hi Anna,
Very good point. And to be honest I hate seeing my little one really upset so I dont think Id leave her.
If you could post up the technique Id really appreciate it.

annamcmahon

This is my version of the Baby Whisperer's technique. It worked quite well for my daughter so it might work for other babies but then again it might not.
Line the basket with a pillowcase that smells like you or your baby's mama. If she likes being swaddled wrap her up and feed with the minimum amount of light in the room. If she falls asleep while feeding don't worry about it.

Put her down in the basket really gently. If she cries pick her up immediately and gently pat her back. If you know that patting won't settle her do something that will, but preferably something that can be done when she's lying on her side. When she calms down and is almost asleep lie her down again. Repeat the steps above if she cries. You might need to do it loads of times and if you're getting frustrated swap with your wife. The key with this technique is that it's not a quick fix but might take a few days and you want to reassure your baby that you will be there if she needs you.

If she is giving out a bit when you put her down but not crying try patting her back without picking her up. If this agitates her more and she starts to cry pick her up and continue patting until she is calm then lie her down and pat until she starts to fall asleep. If she hasn't fallen asleep by her next feed maybe leave it for that night and try again the next.

If she falls asleep in her basket lie on your bed for maybe 30mins in case she wakes. If she does then respond immediately, trying patting her back while she's in her cot and if that doesn't work pick her up and repeat as above.

I found that this worked after the first night but would keep her in our bed after her first feed. After the first week I put her back in her basket after this feed but not the next one. Eventually she went back after every feed and then I really missed her.

Around the same time we started a nighttime routine of clean nappy, a massage, clean vest and babygro, swaddle and then feed. I think it helps babies know that it's bedtime if you do the same thing everynight. We used to do it about 9 but knew she'd probably still awake every 2-3hours. Just so you know, for a newborn sleeping through the night is considered to be 5 hours.

Hope this helps and I haven't given too much information. Feel free to ask if you've any questions.

How Strange

whitelightrider I'm not a fan of routines in general but bedtime routines are sacrosanct in our home. We had a similar innings to you and your wife; our son was extremely windy even though he was breastfed but it disappeared around 10 weeks and that's when we started our bedtime routine.

I think we're fortunate because he's always wanted to go to bed regardless of how bad the night went after that.

We started at 9pm and gradually moved it back by 15-30mins do within 2 weeks he was going to bed at 7.30. We put on his babygro and sleep bag and then I breastfed him and afterwards either his dad or I would put him to bed. We never deviate from this routine even now when we're on holidays abroad for a week. As annamcmahon said its all about routine.

Also I 2nd what annamcmahon said about what's considered a nights sleep for a newborn. Don't expect her to sleep until 7am.

whitelightrider

Hey folks,

Thanks so much for the advice. And dont worry, we know she wont sleep for 7 hours. But even 3 would be great.
At the minute we have no routine. I mean its after 11 now and she's only being put to sleep. But thats down to her being particularly fussy all day today. My poor wife is shattered.

Definitely going to have to work on some kind of routine so that we all get to bed a little earlier.

LegacyUser

We would always attend to our baby when he cried and he slept beside us from Day One.

He currently nods off at 7pm, is breastfed sometimes during the night (my wife doesn't always wake up enough to remember) and finally wakes up for playtime at 7am.

He never has to raise his voice to be comforted as he sleeps right beside his Mum, so barely wakes at all during the night.

I never wake up, only when he taps my face at 7am for playtime.

It's ideal if you're breastfeeding. No getting out of bed, no crying and no bottles.

Perfect!

annamcmahon

We did the same as How Strange re gradually bringing her bedtime forward by 15-20mins until by 6/7months we were starting her routine by 6.30.

Quirkygirl

Hi folks honestly to me this is a bit weird. I breastfed both my babies and they always slept in their own cot as happy as ever. I was always told that a baby needed to sleep without the heat of an adult and that allowing baby to sleep on you was a bad idea as they become used to your heat and so are unable to keep themselves warm and there is a greater risk of cot death here. As a result I always fed, winded cuddled baby and then put them down awake and they always slept, I startedmy routines as soon as I got home really, and they worked really well, I find I have two really happy babies,who sleep in their own cot/bed all night. Once the baby is used to sleeping on your chest it will take some time to retrain the baby to sleep alone as they are only getting used to whatever you present them with.

January

Quirkygirl wrote: »

Hi folks honestly to me this is a bit weird. I breastfed both my babies and they always slept in their own cot as happy as ever. I was always told that a baby needed to sleep without the heat of an adult and that allowing baby to sleep on you was a bad idea as they become used to your heat and so are unable to keep themselves warm and there is a greater risk of cot death here. As a result I always fed, winded cuddled baby and then put them down awake and they always slept, I startedmy routines as soon as I got home really, and they worked really well, I find I have two really happy babies,who sleep in their own cot/bed all night. Once the baby is used to sleeping on your chest it will take some time to retrain the baby to sleep alone as they are only getting used to whatever you present them with.

You know I think there could really be some truth to this, I used to let my first daughter fall asleep on my chest, and I used to fall asleep too, sitting up. She's a horrible sleeper now at 3 years old. Daughters number 2 and number 3 are completely different, go to sleep not a bother in their cot/moses basket at night and I never allowed them to sleep on me for long, even if they fell asleep in my arms they were put down after I had a little cuddle, and the sleep through too!

How Strange

I think, based on my limited experience of 1 child, putting a routine in place before 8 weeks maybe helps the exhausted parents to regain some control of the chaos that has decsended on their home but it has little effect on newborns. At that stage they don't know night from day and sleep when they want. I let my son sleep on/with me because he wouldn't settle in a Moses basket or crib. He wanted to be held all the time and he's the same today at 13 months.

I started a bedtime routine at 9 weeks, once the evening wind stopped, and we've followed it fastidiously since then even when we're on holidays. We coslept (for my convenience and sanity) up to 6 months when his dad insisted we move him to his own room and in terms of sleep we havent looked back since.

Thankfully he loves his cot and he's a great sleeper. I think if you're the kind of person who likes routine, some people don't, then introducing a routine around 9 weeks is important. I think we'd have gone crazy if our son was up past 7pm.

Also, just to add, I don't think cosleeping is the be all and end all but it worked for us. For other families it may not be suitable or preferable.

dahamsta

Just a note on bathing as a couple of people have mentioned it as part of their routine: the general advice these days is to bathe your baby once or twice a week. Bathing more often than that can dry skin too much, and could cause eczema.

annamcmahon

I think if your baby will sleep in a basket from early on then that's great for your family but if they won't there is no point pushing it. I think that a lot of the advice being given on this thread was based on the fact that the OP had tried to get her to sleep in a basket but she didn't want to rather than choosing to have her sleep on his chest. I know my advice was anyway.

Based on my limited experience I don't think that how a baby sleeps initially determines how they will sleep later. My daughter was in our bed until 3 weeks when she happily moved to a basket until she was 4 1/2months. We then, mostly my husband, spent 5 months rocking her to sleep every time she woke. Then one night she just stopped waking and now at 14months sleeps all night in her cot unless sick or teething.

Based on this my next baby will be left co-sleeping for much longer because it's just easier when breastfeeding.