Trying to conceive after a loss in late pregnancy/at birth

Cunning Stunt

Hi all,
I lost a full term baby girl back in November, just minutes after she was born. It has been a very rough few months and we are still healing but one thing we are sure about is that we still want more children, sooner rather than later (I am 34 this year and he will be 37).
I am planning to ask my doctor about recommended waiting time for me, but I was wondering if there is anyone else on here who is trying / has tried to conceive after a loss in late pregnancy/at birth. If so, how long did you wait before trying again ? Do you have any other advice for me?

Thanks a lot
Cunning

Squiggler

Hi Cunning Stunt, as you know we had a similar experience to you. We felt ready to start trying again after about 4 months. Well, trying isn't the right word, I guess it was more that we felt ready to allow the possibility of another pregnancy. And maybe it would be more accurate to say we felt as ready as we thought we'd ever feel.

We were very careful not to make it about "baby making", we'd been through a really tough time and didn't want to be going through the hope and disappointment cycle we'd faced when trying to conceive our firstborn. I kept track of my cycle, ovulation and "acts" (just in case) but other than that we did our best to ignore it. One thing I had to do, to preserve my sanity, was avoid getting into what I think of as a TTC mindset, where everything is focused on that goal.

We both took steps to improve our health and lifestyle and started taking supplements (pregnacare do a his/hers conception kit) regularly again. We also discussed everything, so many conversations beginning with "what if" and so much talk about worst case scenarios. What could we do to try to better protect any other babies? Would we be able to cope with the loss of another child? We're sadder, more cynical and less-optimistic than we were last time, but also better prepared and stronger as a couple.

Only you and your OH can make the decision about when you're ready to try again. Make sure you feel physically and emotionally strong enough, it's not easy. 10 weeks 2 days and still having to keep a tight grip on my emotions, especially when I think about this time last year, when we were looking forward to meeting our firstborn in a month's time.

Synyster Shadow

Im so sorry to hear about both your losses. I cant even begin to imagine how you both feel or how you cope with it, but I do know that the doctors say you can fall Pregnant right after giving birth so many GP's put you on some kind of BCP's or other such things.

Im not in your shoes and Iv not had a baby of my own yet but I thought Id post just for a bit of help

hugs and best wishes to you both

silja

I am so sorry for your loss.
I unfortunately have two friends who lost babies, one at full-term birth and one at 34 weeks, and both were told to wait as long as the pregnancy lasted, to let the body get back to normal before conceiving.