Trolling a butler in Dubai

Sprrratt

AH would be the best place to propose ideas. Im a Dublin northsider in Dubai and ive just won a night in the Burj Al Arab for a night this Friday.

Its something like €1300 a night and every room gets a butler.

Stuck for ideas on ways to take advantage. Give me ideas so I can put this face on

policarp

Can you get Butlers chocolates in Dubai?

WindSock

You get to stay in a plush hotel for free and you want to piss the staff off? Why not give him a decent tip instead, his wages are probably **** already serving every whim of spoiled arseholes.

ottostreet

Lead him to the freezer and lock him in!

Turtyturd

Sprrratt wrote: »

AH would be the best place to propose ideas. Im a Dublin northsider in Dubai and ive just won a night in the Burj Al Arab for a night this Friday.

Its something like €1300 a night and every room gets a butler.

Stuck for ideas on ways to take advantage. Give me ideas so I can put this face on

Print out a copy of that face.

Get the help of an adult to use a scissors and cut around the out line of the face.

Poke 2 holes on either side of the face,

Get a rubber band and cut in half.

Place the ends of the rubber band through each hole and tie a knot in them.

Result

Sprrratt

WindSock wrote: »

You get to stay in a plush hotel for free and you want to piss the staff off? Why not give him a decent tip instead, his wages are probably **** already serving every whim of spoiled arseholes.

Cool story bro, tell it again.

GombeanMan

If you act the bollix over there, expect to lose a hand or more.

WindSock

Sprrratt wrote: »

Cool story bro, tell it again.

k...

WindSock wrote: »

You get to stay in a plush hotel for free and you want to piss the staff off? Why not give him a decent tip instead, his wages are probably **** already serving every whim of spoiled arseholes.

dougal-maguire

ottostreet wrote: »

Lead him to the freezer and lock him in!

Ah, the childhood memories of playing Tomb Raider, those were the days.

fiinch

Sprrratt wrote: »

HEY GUIZE LOL I JST WON A FR3E TRIP AND WANT TO tELL EVERYOEN ABOUT IT LOLOLLo

.

klose

When I was in dubai over the summer I couldnt get over how friendly and well spoken the retail/hotel workers are. Most as im sure you are aware are southish? Asian and have flawless english aswell as arabic anongst their own language.

To find out they worked for very little shocked me seeing as how nice people they were etc..although theyre better off then the indians doing construction over there, slaves basically. So perhaps just have a nice stay in the boat sail hotel and a spot of tennis on the roof instead of being a fool.

P.s amazing city and country, you lucky fecker! Hoping to get work there after college.

stovelid

Try not being an Irish c+nt abroad. That would really mess with his mind as he probably rarely encounters it.

And yeah I know. Cool story bro. Yore ma. TL;DR. And so on.

The King of Moo

Keep calling him Alfred and insist he calls you Master Wayne.

Or, you know, don't troll him as there's no good reason to do so.

Since you want to be a complete dick about your good fortune, ask him to get you an ounce of hash.

See where that gets ye.

Nuri Sahin

whippedcream wrote: »

When I was in dubai over the summer I couldnt get over how friendly and well spoken the retail/hotel workers are. Most as im sure you are aware are southish? Asian and have flawless english aswell as arabic anongst their own language.

To find out they worked for very little shocked me seeing as how nice people they were etc..although theyre better off then the indians doing construction over there, slaves basically. So perhaps just have a nice stay in the boat sail hotel and a spot of tennis on the roof instead of being a fool.

P.s amazing city and country, you lucky fecker! Hoping to get work there after college.

Pretty much echo you're comments! Best place I've traveled to was Dubai by far.

Irish Guitarist

Give him the night off. Ask him if he wants to hang out and watch a DVD or something. If not tell him he can go home.

LETHAL LADY

Ask him can you hold his hand.

Standard Toaster

Have him spit shine your personal black mamba rubber fist you've secretly smuggled into the country.

Ellis Dee

If I won a prize like that, I'd feel rather good about it and even less inclined than usual to treat hotel staff with disrespect.:) There's a saying here in Finland: "Niin metsä vastaa kuin sinne huudetaan" (The forest answers the way you shout into it). Remember that and enjoy your night in the luxury hotel.:):)

Biggins

Sprrratt wrote: »

AH would be the best place to propose ideas. Im a Dublin northsider in Dubai and ive just won a night in the Burj Al Arab for a night this Friday.

Its something like €1300 a night and every room gets a butler.

Stuck for ideas on ways to take advantage. Give me ideas so I can put this face on

Just remember that if you piss these guys (and gals) off, all they have to say to their boss is that your upstairs dancing on a copy of the Koran, cursing Mohammed and/or drawing pictures of him on paper and wiping your arse with it before flushing it!

See who will have the last laugh!

Hint: Don't piss of the staff there!

Cherry_Cola

Be a hero and act as his butler, serving his every whim. Could either make his day or totally weird him out.

Chuck Stone

So you found a way to brag about staying in that hotel?

Sprrratt

Some of you react so bitterly. I was thinking of something funny that would obviously make him laugh too, not piss him off entirely.

Considering a few games of snap if hes up for it.

The King of Moo

Sprrratt wrote: »

Some of you react so bitterly. I was thinking of something funny that would obviously make him laugh too, not piss him off entirely.

Considering a few games of snap if hes up for it.

Then you have a different definition of "trolling" than the rest of us.

Biggins

Sprrratt wrote: »

AH would be the best place to propose ideas. Im a Dublin northsider in Dubai and ive just won a night in the Burj Al Arab for a night this Friday.

Its something like €1300 a night and every room gets a butler.

Stuck for ideas on ways to take advantage. Give me ideas so I can put this face on

Sprrratt wrote: »

Some of you react so bitterly. I was thinking of something funny that would obviously make him laugh too, not piss him off entirely.

Considering a few games of snap if hes up for it.

So now you don't want to take advantage?
You don't want to piss him entirely - just a little?
...And you want to make him smile about it too?

Now you say you want to play Snap?
Seriously?

Yea, right!
Something about this thread sounds dodgy!

Turtyturd

The threads where everyone is against the OP's original idea are always the best ones.:D

...Unless everyone is trolling him.

The King of Moo

Biggins wrote: »

So now you don't want to take advantage?
You don't want to piss him entirely - just a little?
...And you want to make him smile about it too?

Now you say you want to play Snap?
Seriously?

Yea, right!
Something about this thread sounds dodgy!

I think it's a classic case of an OP backtracking after not getting the positive responses he wanted.

"I don't want to troll him, like it says in the thread title I wrote, I want to have fun with him! What's wrong with you people!?"

RobbingBandit

Hostel 4 will begin filming in Dubai this weekend.

Me thinks that the OP's a bit pissed because the thread isn't going the way he expected! :pac:

johnners2981

Sprrratt wrote: »

Some of you react so bitterly. I was thinking of something funny that would obviously make him laugh too, not piss him off entirely.

Considering a few games of snap if hes up for it.

Trolling = a few games of snap?

You're doing it wrong

The_Thing

Tell him you are working for Mossad and you are there to murder his boss.

Giruilla

ottostreet wrote: »

Lead him to the freezer and lock him in!

That reference is to what I think it is right? Ah the simple pleasures in life

Paddy Bateman

Sprrratt wrote: »

AH would be the best place to propose ideas. Im a Dublin northsider in Dubai and ive just won a night in the Burj Al Arab for a night this Friday.

Its something like €1300 a night and every room gets a butler.

Stuck for ideas on ways to take advantage. Give me ideas so I can put this face on

Have him suck you off.

fedor.2.

Tell him you have run out of toilet paper and that you dont want to get your hands dirty, then bend over in front of him

Spacedog

Make him cut your milk...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-8wgr2n1dY

Spacedog

The_Thing wrote: »

Tell him you are working for Mossad and you are there to murder his boss.

yeah, you can show your Irish passport if he doesn't believe you.

df1985

Tell him youre gay and think hes handsome, they love that over there.

Yakult

Ask him to hold the rope as you descend down the side of the building with mission impossible theme tune playing on your phone.

Biggins

Fromthetrees wrote: »

Why would you travel halfway around the world to stay in a hotel for one night?

:pac:

Sprrratt wrote: »

Im a Dublin northsider in Dubai and ive just won...

He's ALREADY there?

Callipo

Sprrratt wrote: »

Im a Dublin northsider

#justsaying

Keith186

Get him to run you a bath then distract him for a minute and throw loads and loads of bubble bath in on the sly. Try and keep him out of the bathroom until its too late and the suds are everywhere.

KCAccidental

Keith186 wrote: »

Get him to run you a bath then distract him for a minute and throw loads and loads of bubble bath in on the sly. Try and keep him out of the bathroom until its too late and the suds are everywhere.

wonderful, get the poor bastard fired then?

weemcd

Think the op should find a fúcking life, then find something better to be at in that hotel or the surrounding area than annoy a butler.

policarp

Sprrratt wrote: »

AH would be the best place to propose ideas. Im a Dublin northsider in Dubai and ive just won a night in the Burj Al Arab for a night this Friday.

Its something like €1300 a night and every room gets a butler.

Stuck for ideas on ways to take advantage. Give me ideas so I can put this face on

To put that face on him would take about 15 or 20 pints of Guinness with a few Jemmy chasers. . .

Samba

Take this saying in a very literal sense in this case OP. Don't bite the hand that feeds you, you want to troll the person who's going to be responsible for serving your food during your stay, right?



That's not trolling, that's asking to be trolled.

mikemac1

Don't get me wrong, it's a fantastic prize but that's a lot of flying for just one night

They could have least made a weekend out of it

Sprrratt wrote: »

and ive just won a night in the Burj Al Arab for a night this Friday.

It has the greatest tennis court, have a quick game up there OP

Hope ya don't get dizzy

http://www.doobybrain.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/11/Burj-Al-Arab-tennis-court.jpg

Mind you don't go sprinting and diving for the ball

Mr.Crinklewood

Can you get a picture of him beforehand?

If so, put his image on the quilt cover.

cloptrop

Just make him have sex with your missus over and over again , this will give you years of laughing at him behind his back.

Pandora2

Aah how naive, you have no idea how staff in 5* Deluxe enjoy watching the likes of yourself, very obviously out of your depth, try and make yourself feel superior to the staff.

Remember, you will be in their house:rolleyes: There is no end to the nasty stuff they can send your way without your even being aware;)

On the other hand, be nice and you could just have a great time;) Remember these guys have dealt with superstars and billionaires....and they do it every day, you don't think that anything you will come up with will turn a hair on his head, do you???? Seriously??

And no he doesn't want to play cards with you...you're work to him!!

cloptrop

Murder all your hookers and say he did it.

BillyMitchel

Ask him does he know how to play hide the sausage with a big grin on your face.