Whats the most disgusting/perverted thing your mates told you they have done?

Snowie

senorwipesalot wrote: »

Heard of a girl in my town who after doing the business with her fella ,got him to take a sh1t in a pyrex dish on her face.Fcukin dirt bird.

you ever notice these stories always begin with I heard? :rolleyes:

LimGal

UglyBolloxFace wrote: »

O....kaaaay. That explains why you probably don't receive any emails.

I have a mate who fixes sarcasm detectors if you're interested........:)

jack_sprat

LimGal wrote: »

I have a mate who fixes sarcasm detectors if you're interested........:)

You would seem to have a lot of truly talented mates by the sound of things:rolleyes:

LimGal

jack_sprat wrote: »

You would seem to have a lot of truly talented mates by the sound of things:rolleyes:

Jaysus Jack maybe he should call around to yours and have a look at your sarcasm detector as well:rolleyes:

Kidchameleon

A fella I know from Belfast was staying in the Red Cow hotel one night and he scored some bird in the nightclub. They went up to his room and your woman fell asleep before they could do anything. Your man then wanked on her!

frag420

Snowie wrote: »

senorwipesalot wrote: »

Heard of a girl in my town who after doing the business with her fella ,got him to take a sh1t in a pyrex dish on her face.Fcukin dirt bird.

you ever notice these stories always begin with I heard? :rolleyes:

That's because I'd they started with "I saw"then most people would have scraped their eyes out with a rusty fork!!

frag420

LimGal wrote: »

frag420 wrote: »

Was seeing a girl last summer for a few weeks. She was staying at her friends apt and invited me over. After watching g a bit if tv and after a few drinks we started getting it on. Now she gave great oral and part of that was rimming. She was fooking amazing at it. Anyways after doing our thing I decided to head home as my place was around corner and her friend would be back soon. We kissed and that's when I realised how bad my ass tasted!! Holy fook!! I spent the five mind walk home licking my sleeve to get the taste out. When I finally got home I jumped in shower and squeezed a half full tube of toothpaste in my mouth.

Lesson learned!!

Amateur mistake frag:D:pac:

Yeah I know!! Next time I'm gonna clean my ass with scented baby wipes!!

Mr.Biscuits

Gummy Panda wrote: »

Some girls like it when you lick front to back in one big lick

Khia?

abouttobebanned wrote: »

Let's fcuk at the window so passers by can see!! Ok...it's 4am and I'm not sure who'll be about....

Probably someone cutting the grass.

Stercus Accidit

LimGal wrote: »

One of my mates last night was telling me(I was listening under duress) about his sexual exploits with some young wan that he pulled in a club recently.He proceeded to tell me that when he got back to hers and they started getting down to the nasty he asked her to rim him..........She agreed but when she went to perform the act she protested that there was a strong smell and taste of you know what so she refused to do it!

Now here is where it gets even weirder........he managed to coax her into cleaning his ah,ahem,'area', with a few baby wipes and then she dutifuly carried out the act!NASTY!!

So guys any stories about disgusting/perverted acts or deeds your mates have done(funny ones preferably)??!!

Hilarious!

Blikes

Not me.

got back to hers, she went to puke, he wanked on her pillow and wrote slut on the inside white part of her curtains! could see it every morning when the curtains were closed before yerwan got up.

senorwipesalot

Blikes wrote: »

Not me.

got back to hers, she went to puke, he wanked on her pillow and wrote slut on the inside white part of her curtains! could see it every morning when the curtains were closed before yerwan got up.

Damn those sexy pillows.

Born to Die

Blikes wrote: »

Not me.

got back to hers, she went to puke, he wanked on her pillow and wrote slut on the inside white part of her curtains! could see it every morning when the curtains were closed before yerwan got up.

Literally, what a wanker.

HazDanz

Kidchameleon wrote: »

A fella I know from Belfast was staying in the Red Cow hotel one night and he scored some bird in the nightclub. They went up to his room and your woman fell asleep before they could do anything. Your man then wanked on her!

Is that not a form of rape?

Deus Ex Machina

LimGal wrote: »

he managed to coax her into cleaning his ah,ahem,'area'

HIS AREA? WHAT'S THAT? HIS ARSEHOLE?????

Grayson

HazDanz wrote: »

Is that not a form of rape?

I was trying to figure that out and have no idea.

dark_shadow

LimGal wrote: »

Ok this is another story about another mate(and before you ask it wasnt me!).............

My mate,lets call him ''John'' pulled this girl who was in his own words pleasantly plump:)Back to her place where he proceeded to do the deed with her.
He described to me that he had her on her back with her two legs over one of his shoulders!He was goin hell for leather and decided to spice it up a bit by ramming two free fingers up her arse:eek:After getting bored with this he removed said two fingers and and did what he describes as ''used me imagination'' and left them beside her mouth:(where he said and again in his own words ''she sucked them clean bhoy!!''.:eek::eek:

I know,I know,I need to get new friends..............

Ah the good old "atm" (arse to mouth) manoeuvre:p

DEFTLEFTHAND

I'd someone confess to a murder to me one night.

LimGal

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

I'd someone confess to a murder to me one night.

Woah!Continue Defty??

Tonyandthewhale

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

I'd someone confess to a murder to me one night.

Giggidy.

DEFTLEFTHAND

LimGal wrote: »

Woah!Continue Defty??

I won't say too much, the guy has gang affiliations. The victim was pure scum who had it coming, his mother is the only person I feel sorry for out of it.

LimGal

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

I won't say too much, the guy has gang affiliations. The victim was pure scum who had it coming, his mother is the only person I feel sorry for out of it.

I take it your mate got away with it??

DEFTLEFTHAND

LimGal wrote: »

I take it your mate got away with it??

He has, I won't be saying anything anyway, you don't mess with these people.

Kidchameleon

HazDanz wrote: »

Is that not a form of rape?

I would classify it as a form of rape certainly.

Gator

bet you he pulled her in coppers...they will do anything in there, have a mate with a similar story

DEFTLEFTHAND

HazDanz wrote: »

Is that not a form of rape?

A sexual offence maybe, not Rape.

patwicklow

LimGal wrote: »

One of my mates last night was telling me(I was listening under duress) about his sexual exploits with some young wan that he pulled in a club recently.He proceeded to tell me that when he got back to hers and they started getting down to the nasty he asked her to rim him..........She agreed but when she went to perform the act she protested that there was a strong smell and taste of you know what so she refused to do it!

Now here is where it gets even weirder........he managed to coax her into cleaning his ah,ahem,'area', with a few baby wipes and then she dutifuly carried out the act!NASTY!!

So guys any stories about disgusting/perverted acts or deeds your mates have done(funny ones preferably)??!!

Was she a member of FF by any chance? They do alot of that.

ejmaztec

patwicklow wrote: »

Was she a member of FF by any chance? They do alot of that.

I think her name is Bidet and her friends call her Biddy.

Chuck Stone

Fucking repulsive. Asses and mouths in contact is just disgusting.

Spunge

Chuck Stone wrote: »

Fucking repulsive. Asses and mouths in contact is just disgusting.

you're just jealous

DEFTLEFTHAND

patwicklow wrote: »

Was she a member of FF by any chance? They do alot of that.

Your not an FF man anyway Pat, hopefully we can win you back, change is coming, I know that may ring hollow at the moment but substantial work is on going with the young members to rebuild the party.

patwicklow

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

Your not an FF man anyway Pat, hopefully we can win you back, change is coming, I know that may ring hollow at the moment but substantial work is on going with the young members to rebuild the party.

Win me back ha ha ha they have you all well brain washed that is for sure lol.

up for anything

some random drunk wrote: »

Told me how the doctor inserted a metal scraping implement into his urethra to take a sample of puss

He must have had a scraping instrument of his own to end up with some of her vagina in his urethra!

kowloon

Chuck Stone wrote: »

Fucking repulsive. Asses and mouths in contact is just disgusting.

You won't like Human Centipede so much then.

Crann na Beatha

This post has been deleted.

DEFTLEFTHAND

patwicklow wrote: »

Win me back ha ha ha they have you all well brain washed that is for sure lol.

Follow us Pat its the only way.

ROFLcopter

Years ago, one of my mates told me that his girlfriend caught him **** in his bedroom, with her dirty knickers on his head whilst sniffing furiously.

He told me the smell of box batter makes him horney!

Dirty cúnt..

baltimore sun

know a guy who thought he was farting while pissing and he pooed on his missus' bathroom rug

Spunge

baltimore sun wrote: »

know a guy who thought he was farting while pissing and he pooed on his missus' bathroom rug

http://www.threadbombing.com/data/media/2/tumblr_l9lgi6vkKr1qzx2fh.gif

midlandsmissus

Kidchameleon wrote: »

I would classify it as a form of rape certainly.

It's sexual assault. And I'm glad you saw that yourself. Did he feel bad when he told you at all?

midlandsmissus

senorwipesalot wrote: »

Heard of a girl in my town who after doing the business with her fella ,got him to take a sh1t in a pyrex dish on her face.Fcukin dirt bird.

Woman remarked on. Man not. Why.

Bullseye1

A college mate went off with his brothers wife. Family has been destroyed.

some random drunk

up for anything wrote: »

He must have had a scraping instrument of his own to end up with some of her vagina in his urethra!

Some common STDs such as Chlamydia and Gonorrhea cause infection of the urethra in males. Transmission can be by oral sex, he wouldn't have even needed to go near her vagina.

ihsb

Chuck Stone wrote: »

Fucking repulsive. Asses and mouths in contact is just disgusting.

Said by someone that hasn't tried mouth to ass contact.

stupidusername

ihsb wrote: »

Said by someone that hasn't tried mouth to ass contact.

you don't know that he hasn't tried it.

he's entitled to his opinion anyway, doesn't have to try it to have one.

Cartman78

stupidusername wrote: »

you don't know that he hasn't tried it.

he's entitled to his opinion anyway, doesn't have to try it to have one.

Well as the old saying goes...opinions are like arseholes etc.

Gummy Panda

ROFLcopter wrote: »

Years ago, one of my mates told me that his girlfriend caught him **** in his bedroom, with her dirty knickers on his head whilst sniffing furiously.

He told me the smell of box batter makes him horney!

Dirty cúnt..

Rob?

Chuck Stone

ihsb wrote: »

Said by someone that hasn't tried mouth to ass contact.

You're absolutely correct. Why the fuck would I want to engage in such a disgusting act?

Gummy Panda

Chuck Stone wrote: »

ihsb wrote: »

Said by someone that hasn't tried mouth to ass contact.

You're absolutely correct. Why the fuck would I want to engage in such a disgusting act?

Cause you or your partner might get a thrill out of it and it's hurting no one?

ihsb

stupidusername wrote: »

you don't know that he hasn't tried it.

he's entitled to his opinion anyway, doesn't have to try it to have one.

True, everyone has an opinion. But if he hasn't tried it and he says he hasn't then he cannot say that what other people find enjoyable is "disgusting". Ah well just what I think.

old hippy

Chuck Stone wrote: »

You're absolutely correct. Why the fuck would I want to engage in such a disgusting act?

Because you have a closed mind?