Sleep training ??

foodaholic

Does anyone is any sleep training methods ? Or used a sleep consultant ?

I'm finding it harder to put her back to sleep after feeding her during the night.
When I do put her down at around 8 she usually wakes up after 20mims and then I spend about an hr getting back to sleep

Anything I've read says you should put them down awake but she just howls if I do that - all advice greatly received

How Strange

Elizabeth Pantleys The No Cry Sleep Solution is supposed to be very good especially if you're not a fan of cry-it-out or controlled crying.

Zambia

And if your ok with controlled crying. Save our sleep by Meg Tilly

annamcmahon

Save our sleep is written by Tizzie Hall not Meg Tilly and the advice in the book is bordering on dangerous and goes a lot of the official SIDS prevention advice. I say this as a woman who found Tracey Hogg kinda useful.

I've just read The No Cry Sleep Solution that another poster recommended and I think that is really good. It offers a number of different solutions depending on your feeding and sleeping arrangements. It helps you to create a staged plan and is realistic that it will take some time to figure out what works for you and your baby. The only quick fixes involve a lot of crying and that is hard on everyone especially baby. By the time I read it my first was pretty much sleeping all night unless sick or teething but I am going to use her suggestions for the baby due this month.

Zambia

Yeah Tizzy Hall thats her. Thanks for that. We used bits of it and found it very good. Other bits are just unworkable you need to do other stuff with your day like. I would be curious what bits are against SIDS guidelines?

How Strange

Tizzy Hall advocates putting loads. (can't remember how many exactly) blankets in your baby which can lead to overheating and is something which can increase the danger of SIDS.

Her 'advice' is outright dangerous and detrimental to the emotional development of babies and toddlers. She seems to believe that all babies are master manipulators who are intent to get the better of us from the moment their born and we, as parents, have to correct their bad behavior.

She says you shouldn't make eye contact with your baby when feeding them. You should punish their 'bad behaviour' which is actually their natural inclination to explore by holding them facing outwards saying mummy doesn't want to hold you. You should close the door to your distressed baby/toddler/child and ignore their cries. For the love of god, you wouldn't treat a puppy or kitten like that so why would you do it to your child.

I don't like Gina Ford and her obsession with routines but Tizzy Hall makes her look like Mary Poppins by comparison.

You can get your baby or toddler into a sleep routine without resorting to these techniques. Elizabeth Pantleys, David Coleman and Dr. Sears give much more gentle advice for creating good sleep routines.

Zambia

Dont recall reading all that but I do admit to skimming over a lot. A lot of people here have had good things to say about her technique.

foodaholic

Thanks for your suggestions - I'll get my hands on the no cry sleep solutions.

What did people find worked for them ?

Rosy Posy

A friend of mine recommended the 'pick up put down method' that she got from a book, I'm not sure which one. Basically when they wake and cry you pick them up and as soon as they settle (but aren't asleep) you put them down again...repeating as necessary until they give in and go to sleep in their cot. As with every new sleep routine it takes a good deal of hard work in the beginning and initially you'll all end up getting less sleep but if you stick to it it 'should' work, depending on the wilfulness of your child and your own resolve. I can't recommend Elizabeth Pantley's book enough- its so broad and gives you so many different tricks to try out. I found for getting a breastfed child to sleep through it was really good to get someone else to do the night settling. There was no way the baby was going to settle without a feed if I went into her but if my husband did it she accepted it and went back to sleep.

annamcmahon

A big thing for us was to change our attitude so that we just accepted that some nights it would take a long time for her to go to sleep. Like your daughter, mine has to be fully asleep before we can put her in her cot for she just cries.

Also don't think in terms of the longterm and creating bad habits. I fell for the whole what we did at 3weeks we would have to do at 3 months and 9 months. I know now that this isn't the case as she slept brilliantly for the first 4 months of her life then badly for 7 and then spontaneously started to sleep really well again when she was 11months.

I have found a gentle relaxed bedtime routine helps somewhat but what that includes seems to vary from baby to baby. Finally remember that for young babies a 5 hour stretch is considered sleeping through.