Breast Feeding in Restaurant

pragmatic1

g'em wrote: »

Why is something that's so fundamentally natural so horrific? What is so 'ignorant' about a woman using her own body to feed her baby? Why do you find this so shocking?

Having a **** is also fundamentally natural but its not really good manners to drop a log while other people are eating. Time and place for everything.

Dudess

Cheeky gal if you're saying you're aged between four and 14, yeah, that makes sense. :pac:
Yeah I shouldn't have gone off on one but I'm sure there are things people say that have you in absolute disbelief. You're saying a woman doing something she is allowed do, by law, is behaving inappropriately and she shouldn't do it, simply because YOU personally find it inappropriate. And that it's "ignorant" - wtf?!
You don't have kids so you're not qualified to tell mothers that they can be prepared etc. You don't have the first clue. It's not fun when everyone is vehemently disagreeing with you but they're not doing so just to be mean. Your attitude is really objectionable - it's selfish and lacking in understanding: "Breastfeeding is icky to me, therefore it should be prohibited in public". No point in the "A woman shouldn't have her rack out in public" argument either as it's a strawman, her rack is covered. The baby is the main concern here and you seem to be forgetting about them.

Lee, I presume the rhetoric you referred to was Lethal Lady asking should women be punished for the best form of feeding - in a sense though, what she's saying isn't wrong. It's seen by some that there should be limits to breastfeeding a baby. And are people not entitled to go for a nice lunch occasionally? You said you don't think they are.

vodkababy

hondasam wrote: »

I said to give the baby a drink of water in a bottle, babies need drinks sometimes between feeds. I understand not all mothers express milk or carry a bottle with them.

Breastfed babies do not need water. All they need is the breastmilk. It's both for rehydration and as a food.

And as for giving a breastfed baby a bottle, this can sometimes cause nipple confusion which can lead to problems with the baby feeding at the breast.

Stercus Accidit

Cheeky_gal wrote: »

...I have issues, I need to seek help, I'm insecure, I'm a prude, I'm a child and I should grow the "****" up.

Yes yes I agree.

jluv

Cheeky_gal wrote: »

And all of that is fair enough but how dare you and others tell me I have issues, I need to seek help, I'm insecure, I'm a prude, I'm a child and I should grow the "****" up.

Tried to be nice...You have issues..

hondasam

LETHAL LADY wrote: »

Yes that is obviously true, but those who do and can breastfeed, because it is not always an option for some, should be allowed to do so without judgment afterall it is a natural act and nothing to be ashamed of.

I agree but should everyone not be entitled to have their own opinion on it without judgement also?
As much as the mother is entitled to breastfeed in the restaurant are the paying diners not entitled to complain if they are uncomfortable with it?

Dudess

pragmatic1 wrote: »

Having a **** is also fundamentally natural but its not really good manners to drop a log while other people are eating. Time and place for everything.

Irony I assume? Seeing as a few of us also quoted that post from g'em advising responses like the above would be forthcoming, which she was understandably baffled by. It's a really disingenuous argument - you're not comparing like with like: what aspect of taking a dump feeds a baby?

dark crystal

pragmatic1 wrote: »

Having a **** is also fundamentally natural but its not really good manners to drop a log while other people are eating. Time and place for everything.

That's why there are toilets provided for such a purpose.

Dudess

hondasam wrote: »

I agree but should everyone not be entitled to have their own opinion on it without judgement also?
As much as the mother is entitled to breastfeed in the restaurant are the paying diners not entitled to complain if they are uncomfortable with it?

Not to management.

hondasam

Dudess wrote: »

Not to management.

what would management do if a mother was feeding her baby and say ten customers walked out? Could they ask the mother to go to a private area?

starbelgrade

Babies in restaurants should eat steak like normal people.

Dudess

hondasam wrote: »

what would management do if a mother was feeding her baby and say ten customers walked out? Could they ask the mother to go to a private area?

Well Iguana says a woman is allowed do so by law, so the restaurant wouldn't have such a right.

2 stroke

This thread has to be a windup, did someone start april early?

Dimithy

hondasam wrote: »

I agree but should everyone not be entitled to have their own opinion on it without judgement also?

People should be entitled to have their own opinion on something, without others being entitled to have an opinion on said opinion?

jluv

2 stroke wrote: »

I've only read the first 2 pages but have to say I'm surprised its 2 of our ladies that protest this ladies actions. As a man I've been made slightly uncomfortable sometimes if a lady started breastfeeding in my view. My discomfort being needing to remain seated, if I became aroused, for fear of the girl, or her companions thinking I was perving on her. This however is my problem being a hotblooded male, and I would never expect a woman to starve a baby or feed it in a toilet for my sake.

Appreciate your honesty;) But you are a product of boobs being seen as a sexual item when they were actually designed to feed children.Sorry to burst your bubble:PEhh stay seated...

starbelgrade

hondasam wrote: »

what would management do if a mother was feeding her baby and say ten customers walked out? Could they ask the mother to go to a private area?

"Excuse me madam, could you go to the breastfeeding area? It's right beside the smoking area out the back"

hondasam

Dudess wrote: »

Well Iguana says a woman is allowed do so by law, so the restaurant wouldn't have such a right.

I often wondered what would happen, how would they handle it.

Cheeky_gal

Dudess wrote: »

You don't have kids so you're not qualified to tell mothers that they can be prepared etc. You don't have the first clue. It's not fun when everyone is vehemently disagreeing with you but they're not doing so just to be mean.

Dudess don't play that "you don't have kids so you're not qualified to have an opinion" card on me. That's got no relevance whatsoever.

And I think you will see if you read through every comment that a lot of people are agreeing with me. We are in the minority in this thread, but yes there are people that disagree with you. Does that mean they have issues? No

starbelgrade

hondasam wrote: »

I often wondered what would happen, how would they handle it.

One hand on each boob.

dark crystal

Cheeky_gal wrote: »

And all of that is fair enough but how dare you and others tell me I have issues, I need to seek help, I'm insecure, I'm a prude, I'm a child and I should grow the "****" up.

If you're going to judge someone for being 'ignorant', don't then act all shocked and surprised if you get judged yourself.

It's a two way street, I'm afraid.

Dempsey

hondasam wrote: »

I often wondered what would happen, how would they handle it.

You'd get a tit slapped across your face....


So I've heard.....

hondasam

2 stroke wrote: »

I've only read the first 2 pages but have to say I'm surprised its 2 of our ladies that protest this ladies actions. As a man I've been made slightly uncomfortable sometimes if a lady started breastfeeding in my view. My discomfort being needing to remain seated, if I became aroused, for fear of the girl, or her companions thinking I was perving on her. This however is my problem being a hotblooded male, and I would never expect a woman to starve a baby or feed it in a toilet for my sake.

Who are the two ladies? You would be aroused if you seen a woman breastfeeding, what age are you 12 ?

Dimithy

Cheeky_gal wrote: »

Dudess don't play that "you don't have kids so you're not qualified to have an opinion" card on me. That's got no relevance whatsoever.

It is of relevance if you're telling mothers how to feed their babies.

starbelgrade

Cheeky_gal wrote: »

Dudess don't play that "you don't have kids so you're not qualified to have an opinion" card on me. That's got no relevance whatsoever.

It does really. If you had kids, you'd probably have a different opinion. If you were breastfeeding, you definitely would.

hondasam

starbelgrade wrote: »

"Excuse me madam, could you go to the breastfeeding area? It's right beside the smoking area out the back"

starbelgrade wrote: »

One hand on each boob.

Dempsey wrote: »

You'd get a tit slapped across your face....


So I've heard.....

Get outta town ye lot:p

Gbear

Dudess wrote: »

Not to management.

They can absolutely complain to management if they wish, but if I was the manager I'd tell them to **** off.

It's absolutely hysterical how someone comes on here, very plainly states their opinion on something, which evidently, virtually nobody agrees with to the point where they consider the opinion ignorant, and then complains how people react to that opinion.

What were you expecting when you started this thread?

"Oh I say OP, well done on mentioning what an ignorant person that woman was when she took out her baby feeding device that has been retroactively made into a sex symbol."

The two way system of freedom of speech is saying something and dealing with the social consequences. If I say "I hate jews" or "Women should stay in the kitchen where they belong" I can't imagine that i'll get the benefit of the doubt.

hondasam

starbelgrade wrote: »

It does really. If you had kids, you'd probably have a different opinion. If you were breastfeeding, you definitely would.

TBF it's always said on any thread about kids that you don't have to be a parent to comment and you don't have to have kids to know about parenthood.

Heckler

Breastfeeding kids is as natural as breathing and to be welcomed. That said I can't stand kids. Especially babies. And especially the smug, i'm so special, i'm a new mother type. Breaking news Hon, you're not the only person in the world to have popped one out. Get over it. Enjoy your child but don't bore the rest of us to death with their sleeping/****ting/burping habits. Thanks......

LETHAL LADY

hondasam wrote: »

I agree but should everyone not be entitled to have their own opinion on it without judgement also?
As much as the mother is entitled to breastfeed in the restaurant are the paying diners not entitled to complain if they are uncomfortable with it?

Of course but why does it make anybody feel that uncomfortable?

starbelgrade

hondasam wrote: »

TBF it's always said on any thread about kids that you don't have to be a parent to comment and you don't have to have kids to know about parenthood.

You don't have to have kids to comment but if you don't have kids you really don't know what you're talking about.

hondasam

LETHAL LADY wrote: »

Of course but why does it make anybody feel that uncomfortable?

TBH I have no idea why it's uncomfortable for some probably the same way talking about sex is taboo for some people.

Dudess

Cheeky_gal wrote: »

Dudess don't play that "you don't have kids so you're not qualified to have an opinion" card on me. That's got no relevance whatsoever.

And I think you will see if you read through every comment that a lot of people are agreeing with me. We are in the minority in this thread, but yes there are people that disagree with you. Does that mean they have issues? No

It's extremely relevant - you can't tell someone how scenarios pan out when you don't have any knowledge of them. I know that card can be pulled by smug parents when it's not warranted, but it is warranted here. Never said it means having issues - I don't always agree with people who say that about this issue, and if it makes someone uncomfortable, fair enough, they can't control that. But they just have to put up and not look, because the woman can do it if she needs to - nobody has a right to stop her. And you and others can say she shouldn't do it and that it's rude all you like, but that's an unreasonable thing to say - therefore people will contest it.

Cheeky_gal

Gbear wrote: »

which evidently, virtually nobody agrees with to the point where they consider the opinion ignorant, and then complains how people react to that opinion.
.

Please read through entire thread and you will see that a lot of people feel this way.

I never complained how people reacted, I complained about the abuse and insults I was receiving for having an opinion.

hondasam

starbelgrade wrote: »

You don't have to have kids to comment but if you don't have kids you really don't know what you're talking about.

Yes I agree but you and I both know that's not how it works in any thread about kids in Ah's. You get the posters with no kids who will say this is how I would do it and we know the reality is much different.

LETHAL LADY

Diddy there I said it tee hee hee.:p

Dudess

hondasam wrote: »

TBF it's always said on any thread about kids that you don't have to be a parent to comment and you don't have to have kids to know about parenthood.

For sure, but you don't have any business telling a parent how they should deal with a specific scenario when you have no experience of it yourself.

dark crystal

LETHAL LADY wrote: »

Diddy there I said it tee hee hee.:p

Baby sucking on a diddy.... *nudge nudge* *snigger*

starbelgrade

I keep thinking of the "bitty" sketch from Little Britain for some reason.

LETHAL LADY

dark crystal wrote: »

Baby sucking on a diddy.... *nudge nudge* *snigger*

Nippletastic tee hee hee;)

hondasam

Dudess wrote: »

For sure, but you don't have any business telling a parent how they should deal with a specific scenario when you have no experience of it yourself.

True.

hondasam

LETHAL LADY wrote: »

Diddy there I said it tee hee hee.:p

LETHAL LADY wrote: »

Nippletastic tee hee hee;)

You are making a TIT of yourself (joke)

corktina

wow, i had thought that opinions like the OPs had died out decades ago. This is a truly shocking thread, especially coming from a fellow woman. My Wife breast-fed all 5 of our kids wherever and whenever necessary for as long as they needed it (youngest now 20///he's weaned now of course:D , me?, not so much)

Dudess

Cheeky_gal wrote: »

Please read through entire thread and you will see that a lot of people feel this way.

I never complained how people reacted, I complained about the abuse and insults I was receiving for having an opinion.

Obviously it's because of the actual opinion itself - "Breastfeeding shouldn't be allowed!" not just because you have an opinion.

Neyite

In about 6 weeks or so, I am due to give birth. I plan to breastfeed. I also plan to do all the things I need to do, such as go to the post office, or the bank, or eat lunch, or shop. Baby will probably feed every couple of hours - did you know that a newborn babies stomach is the size of a marble? So the little that they drink, digests quickly and then in an hour or two that tiny tummy will be empty again.

Have you ever had hunger pangs, say about 30 mins before your lunch break? Not nice. Why would you expect a mother to ignore that pain in her baby.

Cheeky_gal wrote: »

Exactly, I never once said it was "disgusting" of the mother, but I do think she could have done it elsewhere. Not in a restaurant.

Like where? If you dont position the baby properly, and are comfortably sitting, baby will not latch on properly, feed properly and you cause problems like cracked nipples or mastitis, both very painful, so no, I wont sit in a cramped car where neither myself or baby are comfortable.

Ditto for toilets /changing rooms (eh, toilets for babies?) why should my newborn eat where there are fecal and urine spores hanging around the air for them to inhale? now thats disgusting.

hondasam wrote: »

I suppose what I'm saying is you have to take other peoples views into consideration as well.

I plan to - my childs views that is. That is my primary concern. Not random strangers. They certainly dont consider me - like the woman who pushed me out of the way so she could get on the bus first, or the whole lower deck who were happy to let me stand with my 8 month belly hanging out. So, why the F**k should I consider them?

hondasam wrote: »

I said to give the baby a drink of water in a bottle, babies need drinks sometimes between feeds. I understand not all mothers express milk or carry a bottle with them.

Breastfed babies dont need water. Their thirst and hunger is satisfied by breast milk. The foremilk is thicker, which fills them up, and the hind milk is more watery which sates their thirst.

A baby is far more efficient at extracting milk than a breast pump. You might struggle to get an ounce out a day with a pump, after an hour of pumping. That to me is far too precious to waste, by bringing it out in case of baby needing a feed and for fear of offending people who are easily offended. I plan to freeze so that my partner can defrost and use it when I want to sleep more than 3 consecitive hours.

Dempsey wrote: »

I thought they'd look for a baby changing room or something before they'd resort to breastfeeding in a crowded room.

Not all restaraunts have a separate changing room. Usually there is a changing table in a disabled toilet. (which you cant as an able bodied person hog for 40 mins or more to feed a child when a disabled person might need it) toilets are manky, not feeding the little one there. Even if the restaurant has a separate changing room, there are usually discarded nappies and rarely a chair to sit on. You need to sit to comfortably feed baby.

LeeHoffmann wrote: »

I would have thought feeding the child in a side-room or using a bottle with expressed milk from earlier or feeding the baby before dinner or not going to a restaurant with a baby that was likely to need feeding were also alternatives?

My position is that it´s unnecessary to breastfeed in public, it´s not something I would ever do, I would be uncomfortable seeing others doing so, but women have the right to do so

You cant feed a child earlier. Like I said, tummy is the size of a marble. You need to feed the baby when they are hungry. Babies can have growth spurts when they need to feed every hour. They do this and the mothers body responds by producing more milk, which in turn the baby needs with an ever increasing appetitie.

Cheeky_gal wrote: »

As another poster said it's not life or death "I must breast feed my baby now in this restaurant!" - you can plan.

So I can plan eh? please, let me know how to plan to avoid offending the likes of you. I'm serious.

You tell me how to "plan" my day doing the things I need to do like grocery shopping, paying bills, bringing baby for his/her checkups, without breastfeeding in public - and without having to spend hours expressing minute drops of milk that have to go into a bottle and hang around unrefrigerated for an hour or two and is on the verge of going off before baby needs it. (oh and I'm not going to bring my newborn with barely an immune system into a public toilet either)

Please, enlighten me. I'm really interested to hear all the alternatives I apparently have.

Dudess

Heckler wrote: »

Breastfeeding kids is as natural as breathing and to be welcomed. That said I can't stand kids. Especially babies. And especially the smug, i'm so special, i'm a new mother type. Breaking news Hon, you're not the only person in the world to have popped one out. Get over it. Enjoy your child but don't bore the rest of us to death with their sleeping/****ting/burping habits. Thanks......

You can't stand kids? What about nieces/nephews?

Cheeky_gal

Dudess wrote: »

For sure, but you don't have any business telling a parent how they should deal with a specific scenario when you have no experience of it yourself.

I guess there should just be a specific place designed where breast feeding mothers can go then everyone would be happy.

As I posted in a retail thread before... Some parents allow their kids to come into my shop and tear the place apart while they stand chatting on the phone or whatever, totally oblivious to their kids turning the place upside down. Then they'll walk out without apologising for the mess their children left which I then have to clean up. Not all parents are right like, but I guess that's for another days discussion

LETHAL LADY

hondasam wrote: »

You are making a TIT of yourself (joke)

Nell McCafferty would be proud of me. Should I cover up so as not to offend the prudish catholic embarrasement.;)

2 stroke

hondasam wrote: »

Who are the two ladies? You would be aroused if you seen a woman breastfeeding, what age are you 12 ?

I've always presumed you and cheeky gal were female, & even thinking about breasts gets me aroused.

hondasam

Neyite wrote: »

Please, enlighten me. I'm really interested to hear all the alternatives I apparently have.

Congrats hope everything goes well for you and baby.
You seem to have everything covered nothing I could add really.

hondasam

2 stroke wrote: »

I've always presumed you and cheeky gal were female, & even thinking about breasts gets me aroused.

I am female, I have not said the woman was wrong.