Things you've done to really piss a teacher off..

viper.10

I can remember back in primary school i hated the female teacher that taught us from junior infacts up until second class. Everybody that started our school had to go through her first. It would feel that she was eyeing you up as you entered the school to see if you would be one of her wee pets or not. She must of decided that i wasnt to be one of her pets. I swear see looked at me times like she hated me which wasn't great when your only 5 or 6.

Anyway, when i was around 11 or so and had moved into the headmasters classroom and when he wasn't there one day, she had came in to teach us. She was being a real bitch to me and another couple of fellas, when later in the day i had to go to the toilet and then it hit me.

I told her that i had never been potty trained and didnt know how to wipe myself. She knew i was messing but i insisted i had to go and that i couldnt hold it and i needed her to wipe me. So off i went and and did the business and then waited for her to come out. She must have been hoping i'd come in myself cos i was away a good twenty mins or so but eventually she came out and WIPED MY ASS for me. The lads and i still laugh about that story til this day even though now i realise thats its totally disgusting and she probably didnt derserve it but at the time in my own mind she 100% had it coming and just to clear things up i was potty trained.

Anybody else got any stories of revenge, hatred of just general badness towards any of their teachers??

daddydick

You should be ashamed of yourself for doing that instead of coming on here looking for thanks, disgusting

summerskin

Shagged his daughter.

amacachi

Do you sometimes pretend you're disabled and go around in a wheelchair. Holy ****, you're facejackers aren't you!?

Elvis_Presley

What do women and hurricanes have in common?

When they come they're wet and wild and wild.when they leave they take your house and car.

OP you sound like a stellar guy.limme guess, you're single right?

phasers

you're a disgusting, hideous human being.

latenia

If you're going to make something up then at least make it believable..

Gummy Panda

But did she eat da poo poo

darkdubh

Check out my thread on all things retro Mad things you'd get up to in school.

viper.10

sorry guys, it wasn't me that started this trend it was an idiot "mate" of mine. how can i delete this trend?. sorry again guys.

Coriolanus

I didn't try my best for the lc.

Ghandee

viper.10 wrote: »

sorry guys, it wasn't me that started this trend it was an idiot "mate" of mine. how can i delete this trend?. sorry again guys.

No it wasn't.

Now your gonna sit there, and take your punishment like a big boy now!

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

Not like Irish, while being good at every other subject. That did it.

Also used to piss off the science techers by farting silently and then making low hissing noises while he went around and checked all the gus taps.

Born to Die

No teacher is going to wipe the ass of an 11 year old ffs.
They won't let a kid start school until they are toilet trained.

OP is lying

/ thread

Apologies the OP may have required a special needs assistance, if that is the case it may not be a lie.

Gummy Panda

Born to Die wrote: »

No teacher is going to wipe the ass of an 11 year old ffs.
They won't let a kid start school until they are toilet trained.

OP is lying

/ thread

Apologies the OP may have required a special needs assistance, if that is the case it may not be a lie.

Probably be considered sexual assault these days anyway

44leto

The OP is a disgusting human being, I would shut up about that story and try my best to live with such depravity. REALLY it beggars belief.

Anyone

This is going back a bit, and it wasnt me, but another bloke in the class....anyway...Irish....and the book Peig. We had a student teacher, and I'll be honest we all gave her somewhat of a hard time.

One day, we start on Peig(jesus how I hated that book), anyway, bloke in the class opens the book and starts to tear out the pages one by one, the student teacher catches him and starts telling him to stop, he keeps going, staring at her, and ripping out page by page. Her yells become louder until eventually she starts to cry and leaves the class.

neil_

daddydick wrote: »

You should be ashamed of yourself for doing that instead of coming on here looking for thanks, disgusting

phasers wrote: »

you're a disgusting, hideous human being.

idk if you guys are serious but he was 11 years old, theres hardly any point criticising someone about something they did when they were still a child..

phasers

neil_ wrote: »

idk if you guys are serious but he was 11 years old, theres hardly any point criticising someone about something they did when they were still a child..

He's not 11 years old anymore, and he's lying bragging about what he did. You don't see a problem with that?

Riesen_Meal

phasers wrote: »

neil_ wrote: »

idk if you guys are serious but he was 11 years old, theres hardly any point criticising someone about something they did when they were still a child..

He's not 11 years old anymore, and he's lying bragging about what he did. You don't see a problem with that?

No, its after hours, I come wearing a feeling-proof vest....

Scanlas The 2nd

Me and another guy used to hum just loud enough to annoy the teacher, we coordinated so she didn't know where it was coming from.

neil_

phasers wrote: »

He's not 11 years old anymore, and he's lying bragging about what he did. You don't see a problem with that?

no.. he said that he knows it's disgusting now; it's just an interesting story, even if it's not quite dinnertime discussion.

Jezek

One teacher in particular was paying attention only to all the posh cnuts in the classroom...One day she told them they could go home early. So I took out some bills and started waving them around saying 'wait I have money too, can I go out early with the rich kids? I know that's what matters in this class.'

Looking back at it it was really weird, and probably had to do with her knowing their parents as she probably moved in those kinds of circles rather than anything to do with money.

Otis Driftwood

neil_ wrote: »

idk if you guys are serious but he was 11 years old, theres hardly any point criticising someone about something they did when they were still a child..

Jon Venables and Robert Thompson were 10 when they murdered Jamie Bulger.

Kids eh.
:rolleyes:

Stiffler2

Putting the bin against the door of the class, when the teachers bursts in, haw haw you spilt the bin over you silly b!tch, now get down and pick that $hit up.

Like Scanlas, co-ordinating humming at either end / side of the class, this was class.

leaving eggs / bananas down the radiator

This 1 dude hockied up a huggeee greener and hockied it up onto the ceiling above where the teacher sat.

Que the whole class staring at this grenner dangling from the ceiling.
unfortunately the greener that was stuck to the ceiling very very slowly started to droop down but alas it was the next class who got to see it sticking to the teachers head and not ours, I was disappoint.

class all the same though. sent a few teachers home crying, they deserved every single bit of it as well.

chin_grin

Stiffler2 wrote: »

Putting the bin against the door of the class, when the teachers bursts in, haw haw you spilt the bin over you silly b!tch, now get down and pick that $hit up.

Like Scanlas, co-ordinating humming at either end / side of the class, this was class.

leaving eggs / bananas down the radiator

This 1 dude hockied up a huggeee greener and hockied it up onto the ceiling above where the teacher sat.

Que the whole class staring at this grenner dangling from the ceiling.
unfortunately the greener that was stuck to the ceiling very very slowly started to droop down but alas it was the next class who got to see it sticking to the teachers head and not ours, I was disappoint.

class all the same though. sent a few teachers home crying, they deserved every single bit of it as well.

I guarantee none of this happened.

Stiffler2

chin_grin wrote: »

I guarantee none of this happened.

blasphemy

3hn2givr7mx1sc

A few of my friends in the year above were locked out of the classroom by the teacher because they kept arriving late. So after a few days of this they came in early and when she went out to get something one of the lads locked her out. I think she started to cry eventually.

Milk & Honey

I know a guy who hung a teachers dog. He tied a rope around the dogs neck and strung it up over the branch of a tree. It took the dog about 15 minutes to die of strangulation (dogs have very strong necks). The dog was making horrible hoarse sounds as it hung there slowly asphyxiating.

kfallon

Had this really hot French teacher who was so into me, I could tell she wanted a shot at the title but to piss her off I wouldn't let her have a piece of me! Sometimes when she was writing on the blackboard I would ask her if she needed help then go up behind her and rub my boner off her! She used to try to seduce me all the time by not wearing any kaks and sitting in front of me with her legs akimbo! She would often leave notes in my homework book with her number on it and telling me that she used to, and I quote, "rasher the gee off herself thinking about me"....even tho she was French she had a real good grasp of Irish slang!

It made me feel so powerful knowing the control I had over her. I could see how frustrated she was becoming not being able to have the one thing she craved. She often got angry at me for not giving her one but would eventually break down crying, telling me how much she loved me! Eventually I relented, shoved it in her ring and then wiped my willy on her bum cheek when I was finished!


Well if everyone else is gonna lie in the this thread I may as well join in :pac:

Eroticfishcake

Milk & Honey wrote: »

I know a guy who hung a teachers dog. He tied a rope around the dogs neck and strung it up over the branch of a tree. It took the dog about 15 minutes to die of strangulation (dogs have very strong necks). The dog was making horrible hoarse sounds as it hung there slowly asphyxiating.

Ah seriously, why would you even tell us that story? That wouldn't just píss a teacher off, it's sick and that guy is 1 sick fúck. That really is horrible.

Susie_Q

Milk & Honey wrote: »

I know a guy who hung a teachers dog. He tied a rope around the dogs neck and strung it up over the branch of a tree. It took the dog about 15 minutes to die of strangulation (dogs have very strong necks). The dog was making horrible hoarse sounds as it hung there slowly asphyxiating.

Were you present? You must have been to be able to describe the noise the dog was making as it died. Why the fvck didn't you intervene??! :mad:

AngryBollix

I tried to shag my french teacher after a pub quiz.

keithb93

I remember my friend used to leave thumbtacks on my teachers chair. It was fairly hilarious.

Crimbouser

Nothing. Ever. How sadistic are you lot!!

Feeona

There are a few sick posts in this thread, and even if they're not true, you'd have to wonder at the minds behind them :eek:

Seeing threads like this make me wonder if there any people left who still think teaching is a handy number.

Warper

Cum on his face

batm!ke

I didn't do this on purpose (honest) but at our Leaving Cert results night a load of the teachers and the students who were over 18 went to a local nightclub, one female teacher was hilariously drunk and giving all her students hugs, she went to hug me from behind and as I turned into the hug I tried to lift my arm over her as I had a cigarette in my hand, and as I did I scraped the lit cigarette all the way up her bare arm... she roared but the drink must have instantly numbed the pain as she finished the hug and went on her merry way. Probably to the bathroom to cry

Lawrence1895

I fell asleep a few times, that's all

Omackeral

Milk & Honey wrote: »

I know a guy who hung a teachers dog. He tied a rope around the dogs neck and strung it up over the branch of a tree. It took the dog about 15 minutes to die of strangulation (dogs have very strong necks). The dog was making horrible hoarse sounds as it hung there slowly asphyxiating.

Talented dog. Can he do any other farmyard noises?

Snowie

take aliens the movie and the bishop knife thing one compass and my hand :pac:
point blank refused to learn irish..
Kicked a door open and hit the teacher in the face :pac:
made a teacher cry which i think is a bit awful...

Bit of a smart ass

geeky

kfallon wrote: »

Had this really hot French teacher who was so into me, I could tell she wanted a shot at the title but to piss her off I wouldn't let her have a piece of me! Sometimes when she was writing on the blackboard I would ask her if she needed help then go up behind her and rub my boner off her! She used to try to seduce me all the time by not wearing any kaks and sitting in front of me with her legs akimbo! She would often leave notes in my homework book with her number on it and telling me that she used to, and I quote, "rasher the gee off herself thinking about me"....even tho she was French she had a real good grasp of Irish slang!

It made me feel so powerful knowing the control I had over her. I could see how frustrated she was becoming not being able to have the one thing she craved. She often got angry at me for not giving her one but would eventually break down crying, telling me how much she loved me! Eventually I relented, shoved it in her ring and then wiped my willy on her bum cheek when I was finished!

Sam Brick, is that you?

Immaculate Pasta

viper.10 wrote: »

sorry guys, it wasn't me that started this trend it was an idiot "mate" of mine. how can i delete this trend?. sorry again guys.

Oh dear. Looks like your "funny" thread backfired and you attempted to cover your tracks.

I guess it's school holiday time at the moment and a lot of the kids are sat at home bored. After Hours should get back to normal next week and these daytime threads started by kids will stop. I look forward to a better quality of threads started next week by us superiors who are either unemployed/bored office workers/arts students :cool:

cocoshovel

What are you on about, its the same as always.

Mickey Dazzler

My father was a teacher and I'm pretty sure that my birth and subsequent life has really pissed him off.

Owen_S

viper.10 wrote: »

I can remember back in primary school i hated the female teacher that taught us from junior infacts up until second class. Everybody that started our school had to go through her first. It would feel that she was eyeing you up as you entered the school to see if you would be one of her wee pets or not. She must of decided that i wasnt to be one of her pets. I swear see looked at me times like she hated me which wasn't great when your only 5 or 6.

Anyway, when i was around 11 or so and had moved into the headmasters classroom and when he wasn't there one day, she had came in to teach us. She was being a real bitch to me and another couple of fellas, when later in the day i had to go to the toilet and then it hit me.

I told her that i had never been potty trained and didnt know how to wipe myself. She knew i was messing but i insisted i had to go and that i couldnt hold it and i needed her to wipe me. So off i went and and did the business and then waited for her to come out. She must have been hoping i'd come in myself cos i was away a good twenty mins or so but eventually she came out and WIPED MY ASS for me. The lads and i still laugh about that story til this day even though now i realise thats its totally disgusting and she probably didnt derserve it but at the time in my own mind she 100% had it coming and just to clear things up i was potty trained.

Anybody else got any stories of revenge, hatred of just general badness towards any of their teachers??

Milk & Honey

Susie_Q wrote: »

Were you present? You must have been to be able to describe the noise the dog was making as it died. Why the fvck didn't you intervene??! :mad:

I wasn't present. I'd heard he was knifing ducks on the lake. I was talking to someone about it and they mentioned that he had also hung a dog. I then met someone else and I mentioned the dog hanging incident. He told me whose dog it was and how it died. My brother used to hang around with a son of the teacher. I was able to verify the story very satisfactorily. I didn't like that teacher myself to be honest but I was sorry for the dog.

One thing I did do to another teacher was to mix up weedkiller and put it into his garden. After a few days brown patches started to appear at random all over his pride and joy front garden. I then posted the label of the weedkiller bottle to him with a note - Brown Fingers Strikes Again. I got a friend to post it, making sure that I was on a school football trip at the time of posting so I had an alibi.

Fuhrer

Used to love the old Wireless doorbell gag

plys

got suspended for smacking her in the face with a rubber..

The King of Moo

plys wrote: »

got suspended for smacking her in the face with a rubber..

Was that before or after you used the condom?

I think it's an important distinction.

plys

The King of Moo wrote: »

Was that before or after you used the condom?

I think it's an important distinction.

too easy..!!