Mashed Spuds

fonecrusher1

I recently had dinner at a friends family home. We had a classic irish meal, the oul mashed spuds with beans & sausages. All was fine, beans - nice n soft but not mush. Sausages, lovely clonakilty sausages.

Now the mash......sorry im getting upset again, give me one second........

Now the mash....im ok, i can do this.....the mash was fcuking lumpy ok. The mash was god damn lumpy.

Lumps the size of damn maltesers ok. I cannot eat bloody lumpy mashed potatoes, i just cant. I literally retched a bit as i made this horrific realisation. Not a loud retch but it was noticed. An awkward silence came upon the table.

So i ask thee, do thee think mashed spuds should be mashed PROPERLY as in nice smooth soft mash with a bit of milk and butter or are you one of these perverts who actually has a fondness for semi mashed spuds or 'smashed' spuds as some of you cretins call them?

In my veiw you either mash them properly or your a pervert just leave them unmashed.

:mad:

Blatter

A warrant should be issued for the arrest of whoever made those potatoes...disgraceful carry on.

cml387

Is that you Paolo Tullio?

later12

My Mum makes mash so lumpy I used to think that mashing your mash with your fork was normal.

When I found out the beauty of really smooth mash, I never spoke to her again.

fonecrusher1

later12 wrote: »

When I found out the beauty of really smooth mash, I never spoke to her again.

Proper order as well.

High five?

Sir Oxman

Lumpy mashed spuds have the most disgusting texture, I'd puke (and almost did at a mates house when that was dished up to me)
Lumpy mashed potatoes are almost as puke inducing awful as cucumber.

Shooting is too good for this MASSIVE fck up - mash the arse out of them.

lividduck

fonecrusher1 wrote: »

I recently had dinner at a friends family home. We had a classic irish meal, the oul mashed spuds with beans & sausages. All was fine, beans - nice n soft but not mush. Sausages, lovely clonakilty sausages.

Now the mash......sorry im getting upset again, give me one second........

Now the mash....im ok, i can do this.....the mash was fcuking lumpy ok. The mash was god damn lumpy.

Lumps the size of damn maltesers ok. I cannot eat bloody lumpy mashed potatoes, i just cant. I literally retched a bit as i made this horrific realisation. Not a loud retch but it was noticed. An awkward silence came upon the table.

So i ask thee, do thee think mashed spuds should be mashed PROPERLY as in nice smooth soft mash with a bit of milk and butter or are you one of these perverts who actually has a fondness for semi mashed spuds or 'smashed' spuds as some of you cretins call them?

In my veiw you either mash them properly or your a pervert just leave them unmashed.

:mad:

Mashed can have lumps in them, creamed potatoes on the other hand should be smooth and silky and buttery..yum yum yum

Poor Uncle Tom

Pandy ftw.....;)

fonecrusher1

Poor Uncle Tom wrote: »

Pandy ftw.....;)

Dont know what your on about to be honest.

Sofaspud

Really depends on the type of mash you're going for.
Sometimes I'm just in the mood for nice smooth creamy ones, but occasionally I'll leave the skins on when I boil them and instead of mashing them, stir them violently and crush them with a wooden spoon, add milk, butter, salt pepper & herbs and they're bloody lovely.

frag420

Milk and pepper and your sorted!! For every lump you found you should have left a lump on their head, made from knuckles!!

Fromthetrees

Proper smooth mash for a shepherds pie requires you to put the boiled spuds through a ricer, adding a load of butter, some heavy cream, lots of grated cheese and two egg yolks, salt and pepper, they turn out absolutely yum yum yum.

xzanti

It wasn't lumpy it was Leumpé

It's Nouveau Cuisine.. get some culture into your life.. Peasant.





:pac:

Mint Sauce

Mashed topped with butter, heinz (batcholors if nothing else) baked beans, and some cracked pepper, with a couple of pork sausages on the side.

Nyom nyom nyom.

Poor Uncle Tom

fonecrusher1 wrote: »

Dont know what your on about to be honest.

http://dixiemockingbird.hubpages.com/hub/Irish-Champ-Poundies-Colly-or-Pandy-Perfect-Irish-Mashed-Potatoes-with-Green-Onion

Gummy Panda

irish-stew wrote: »

Mashed topped with butter, heinz (batcholors if nothing else) baked beans, and some cracked pepper, with a couple of pork sausages on the side.

Nyom nyom nyom.

I'm so hungry now

xzanti

Fromthetrees wrote: »

Proper smooth mash for a shepherds pie requires you to put the boiled spuds through a ricer, adding a load of butter, some heavy cream, lots of grated cheese and two egg yolks, salt and pepper, they turn out absolutely yum yum yum.

I'm having a heart attack just reading that..

dahat

Lumpy or smooth spuds are rotten..........

fonecrusher1

Poor Uncle Tom wrote: »

http://dixiemockingbird.hubpages.com/hub/Irish-Champ-Poundies-Colly-or-Pandy-Perfect-Irish-Mashed-Potatoes-with-Green-Onion

I have reveiwed this contribution & I find you guilty of the destruction of perfectly good creamy mashed potatoes by infecting it with bits of crunchy green stuff.

Application to have this 'pandy' accepted as superior to regular mash - DENIED

You may try again in six months time. Good day sir.

I said good day.

xzanti

dahat wrote: »

Lumpy or smooth spuds are rotten..........

Get out.

secretambition

While I'd prefer it smooth, I could easily deal with lumpy mash, assuming the potatoes were fully cooked and that wasn't the reason for the lumps.

fonecrusher1

dahat wrote: »

Lumpy or smooth spuds are rotten..........

Post reported.

Reason - Trying to cause a civil war.

sunflower27

I feel your pain!!!!

There is just no excuse for it but pure laziness

It has to be creamy and smooth. Mash is one of my favourite things in the world.

I seriously would reconsider this friendship, to be honest. What were they thinking?

stripysocks85

I HATE LUMPY MASH!

It annoys me more than upsets me. When I make mashed potato, I use a blender to make it really smooth. Lump free

Edited to add: Wonder is there anyone who actually ENJOYS finding a lump or 3 in their mash? :rolleyes:

dahat

stripysocks85 wrote: »

I HATE LUMPY MASH!

It annoys me more than upsets me. When I make mashed potato, I use a blender to make it really smooth. Lump free

But surely that is not mashed potato then?
Blended potato is entirely different to the old fashioned masher,think the OP is calling his/her friend on their mashing technique not the lazy out and using a blender...use a masher and be a real spud person

DebDynamite

Growing up, I feckin hated the mashed potatoes I used to be given for dinner. Now that I'm older I love mash potatoes if done in the right way - potato ricer, butter, milk/cream, salt & pepper. It's just the way my mother made it didn't appeal to my sophisticated taste buds

There's a world of difference between just mashing some potatoes and mash done the proper way.

joseph brand

stripysocks85 wrote: »

I HATE LUMPY MASH!

It annoys me more than upsets me. When I make mashed potato, I use a blender to make it really smooth. Lump free

Edited to add: Wonder is there anyone who actually ENJOYS finding a lump or 3 in their mash? :rolleyes:

Whoa whoa whoa! A blender? GTFO

All that's required is a drop of milk, lump of butter, salt and pepper, a potato masher and your elbows.

If you have small children, stick their wellies on and let them walk around in your pot mashing as they go. Warning: This may leave potato footprints on floors.

joseph brand

DebDynamite wrote: »

Growing up, I feckin hated the mashed potatoes I used to be given for dinner. Now that I'm older I love mash potatoes if done in the right way - potato ricer, butter, milk/cream, salt & pepper. It's just the way my mother made it didn't appeal to my sophisticated taste buds

There's a word of difference between just mashing some potatoes and mash done the proper way.

Rickyism or spelling error?

http://trailerpark.wikia.com/wiki/Rickyisms

DebDynamite

joseph brand wrote: »

Rickyism or spelling error?

http://trailerpark.wikia.com/wiki/Rickyisms

Edited :pac:

fonecrusher1

stripysocks85 wrote: »

When I make mashed potato, I use a blender to make it really smooth. Lump free

Spud Police.

Right i was gonna let this go but youve gone too far with the blender talk, give me your spud eaters license & registration number.

Right thats a fixed penalty which is - nobody is allowed take you seriously in this thread for at least another 2 hours.

You can appeal this decision but if your appeal is rejected you could face permanent mockery for any further contributions to this thread.

Good day.

stripysocks85

dahat wrote: »

But surely that is not mashed potato then?
Blended potato is entirely different to the old fashioned masher,think the OP is calling his/her friend on their mashing technique not the lazy out and using a blender...use a masher and be a real spud person

With the masher, the one I had was **** and bent everytime I used it. Have since gotten a proper one, which doesn't bend. However, mash that you get in restaurants I assume is blended in some way as it's quicker & easier to get the mashed consistency.

stripysocks85

Fine can I just specify that it's only OCCASIONALLY I use a blender. Hell, I don't make mash that often anyway! :rolleyes:

Ms. Pingui

Never mind the lumpy mash, its the beans that would have been the problem for me. I'm petrified of 'em. Nver mind retching, I would have left the house in tears

pragmatic1

I despise lumpy mash. Either mash them properly or dont bother at all.

SerialComplaint

Fromthetrees wrote: »

Proper smooth mash for a shepherds pie requires you to put the boiled spuds through a ricer, adding a load of butter, some heavy cream, lots of grated cheese and two egg yolks, salt and pepper, they turn out absolutely yum yum yum.

Let us know how you get on with the heart bypass operation.

frag420

I once made a posh bangers and mash. I grated some apple into the spuds, delish!!

Of course I delumpified the mash first!!

woodoo

Its sore on the arm for old dolls to mash them properly. A note to the fit and healthy... lend a hand and do them properly yourself.

veronymus

My spud phobia was borne of lumpy mash. Used to literally cry as I was forced to eat mash with the offending lumps in. As soon as I graduated to adulthood, no variation of spud would pass my lips. Parents have no idea of the lasting damage this can cause.:mad:

BraziliaNZ

I can't believe you all eat carbs. Gross.

TPD

Hard to beat some spuds with butter, milk and salt, mashed to a creamy goodness with some finely chopped scallions thrown in, smothered in gravy. Mmmm.

stupidusername

I don't eat potatoes

mackmuffin

I dont even usually like bangers and mash yet this thread has me wanting it....wtf??
mash potatoes have to be mashed to perfection, using a lil milk and butter.
damn this diet

Agricola

Good way of vetting a gf for the role of future wife. If she doesnt mash the spuds properly, then what other shortcuts will she take in life? The sign of a wastrel who has no attention to detail and doesnt take pride in a job well done if you ask me.

sunflower27

stripysocks85 wrote: »

Fine can I just specify that it's only OCCASIONALLY I use a blender. Hell, I don't make mash that often anyway! :rolleyes:

If I had a blender, I'd use it....:D

Sounds like a great idea to me if it gets all those pesky lumps out.

tempura

Poor Uncle Tom wrote: »

Pandy ftw.....;)

Big Nostalgic moment there, haven't heard that word in years, acutally thought my family were the only people who used it.

I make great pandy.

saa

My boyfriends mother cooks these manky little rooster potatoes with the skin on, the driest potatoes I've ever encountered and she breaks up the potatoes with a masher one or twice, disgraceful.

Chuck Stone

People who let baked beans and mashed potato mate are creeps. That's inter species meddling that nature just didn't intend - a human created folly with far reaching and unpredictable outcomes.

I'd advocate that people who put baked beans on mash should be put on the sex offenders register or something akin to it.

mackmuffin

Chuck Stone wrote: »

People who let baked beans and mashed potato mate are creeps. That's inter species meddling that nature just didn't intend - a human created folly with far reaching and unpredictable outcomes.

I'd advocate that people who put baked beans on mash should be put on the sex offenders register or something akin to it.

How could you not like bangers n mash?
Tis like food for the soul:eek::)

Chuck Stone

mackmuffin wrote: »

How could you not like bangers n mash?
Tis like food for the soul:eek::)

Bangers and mash together is fine.

Mash and baked beans? Disgusting and unnatural.

stripysocks85

Chuck Stone wrote: »

Bangers and mash together is fine.

Mash and baked beans? Disgusting and unnatural.

It's a comfort thing from my childhood, probably fed to me when I was a baby and getting used to solids. Beans and mashed potato, mashed up together, or my personal favourite, mashed potato, peas and a load of gravy all mashed together = heaven!

Madam

Bangers and mash with a wee indentation at the top for your gravy (or a bit of butter) - Never with baked beans - it's just not the Irish way(English or Scottish yes but not Irish!).