Nagging in relationships

grindle

whatdoicare wrote: »

Nope, none of the men I know are morons.

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V

whatdoicare wrote: »

any guy I know both friends and family behave the same way- if they are sick, sore or sorry they'll ignore it until someone makes them sort it out.

Robdude

Threads like this remind me how lucky I am to have my wife.

// As a grown man, I would not take kindly to someone telling me when or how to do some trivial task. I can handle that just fine on my own.

ntlbell

Robdude wrote: »

Threads like this remind me how lucky I am to have my wife.

// As a grown man, I would not take kindly to someone telling me when or how to do some trivial task. I can handle that just fine on my own.

I'm not sure who I feel sorry for, the man having to listen to it or the idiot that can't figure out it will never help.

flip a coin.

Feeona

A lot of tension there lads....lighten up

grindle

Feeona wrote: »

A lot of tension there lads....lighten up

Nag.

Fiona

When husband does things without having to be asked means I am less stressed and have more time to be sex goddess.

When husband is lazy and doesn't take his finger out means I have to do everything and means I have less time to be sex goddess.

I must be ****e in bed cos I still have to nag him to do stuff

The Big Red Button

Seomra Mushie wrote: »

There are some gender stereotypes I hate but this one, I'm happy to concur with. Women nag, I'm sorry, we just do.

Well, I'm sorry, but I just don't, so speak for yourself!

I'm a grown-up woman, I'm responsible for myself. Any man I want to be involved with, will also be a responsible grown-up, who can look after himself and won't require "nagging." I've no intention of ever taking care of some mammy's boy who needs to be nagged!

G-Money

If you do the thing straight away, you'll get asked to do something else then. Better to stretch it out and do as little as possible :cool:

BarackPyjama

If you feel the need to constantly nag your partner, do the decent thing and end the relationship and find someone more deserving of you. If you're using nagging as some kind of 'emotional stability test' then you're obviously completely f**king deranged - go and get professional help.

'Nagging'. How childish. :cool:

Dudess

Elmer Blooker wrote: »

........ but women are from venus, they don't nag do they? :rolleyes:
This thread will soon be censored...... eh sorry I meant to say locked.

You were saying?
If a thread is locked, it's due to getting too heated, not for censorship. You can still read it when it's closed.

Quality

My husband loves to be nagged at.

I swear he gets pleasure out of it.


Sure why wouldn't he just do things the first time I tell him.


I mean the fact that he doesn't he just knows I am gonna nag him!

K-9

It's generally just built into them, part of the Irish Mammy thing. Men just have to be nagged.

HenryChinaski

Bitches be scandalous!

Scanlas The 2nd

Quality wrote: »

My husband loves to be nagged at.

I swear he gets pleasure out of it.


Sure why wouldn't he just do things the first time I tell him.


I mean the fact that he doesn't he just knows I am gonna nag him!

There's also the argument that if one person likes the house clean they should clean it themselves, why should someone have to clean if they are content with the house not being clean, though still they should clean up after themselves. But say hoovering for example, if one person gets more value out of the end result surely they should do it more often.

pickarooney

Men will generally take the simpler approach of moving object A from point B to point C and forget about while women will prefer to point out that object A is not in is correct place and ask for it to be moved (it could be a sock or a steamroller).

This perpetuates the idea that the woman is infallible as she never needs to be told to do anything while the man is constantly being reminded, reproached and reprimanded for his failure. This of course breeds resentment with the man then (subconsciously at first) failing to carry out the task, developing into a more wilful rebellion as the man feels more put-upon and emasculated (the fact he's being bossed about at work and by his children will exacerbate the feeling of subservience over time.

The more trivial the task, the greater the likelihood of conflict. She could understand his reluctance to build a wall but not his refusal to close the press door; he wouldn't mind if she asked him to dig a pond but doesn't get why she would prefer to waste everyone's time with an argument when it takes no time to turn off the light in the bathroom.

BBDBB

chatterpillar wrote: »

Well, I'm sorry, but I just don't, so speak for yourself!

I'm a grown-up woman, I'm responsible for myself. Any man I want to be involved with, will also be a responsible grown-up, who can look after himself and won't require "nagging." I've no intention of ever taking care of some mammy's boy who needs to be nagged!

My needing to be nagged has nothing to do with me being a mammys boy.

I happen to be incompetent, disorganised and inherently lazy actually!

Zulu

What's the difference between nagging & reminding?

Frankly I need to be told loads of times, cause I don't remember. Hanging the photos on the wall or changing the toilet seat in the downstairs loo aren't tasks easily remembered.

kfallon

mrs crilly wrote: »

When husband does things without having to be asked means I am less stressed and have more time to be sex goddess.

When husband is lazy and doesn't take his finger out means I have to do everything and means I have less time to be sex goddess.

I must be ****e in bed cos I still have to nag him to do stuff

He he he....sounds like a man after my own heart

:pac:

Sykk

My girlfriend NEVER nags.. ever.. She's not Irish if that helps? Or perhaps it's just that we're only together a year..

ash23

I was accused of being a "nag" once by my ex....shortly before the demise of the relationship.
Sequence of events was it was coming up to christmas. We were both busy in work. He wanted to stay home for the holidays so I took the child down to see my family, 2 hours away. All I asked him to do was keep the house clean for the two days I was away.
I arrive back christmas eve morning. The place is a tip. I actually cried. I had to go and get everything organised for HIS parents coming to us for dinner the next day.
So I clean the house, do the shopping, prep the dinner for the next day, collect him from work, cook dinner for that night, put the child to bed after the santa ritual, wrap and assemble the presents and fall into bed. He was too "tired" after work to help.
Xmas day I make a special breakfast, entertain his family and feed them etc.
Stephens day we have his cousins, his parents and my parents to visit. I spend the day making tea and entertaining the parents while he sits on his hole all day playing PS3. He basically ignores our guests.
I'm dying for everyone to leave because I just want to spend the night relaxing because I'm back to work the next day. He announces his cousins are staying down and he's going out that night.
I flip out, eat the head off him and I'm called (and look like) a nag.

From his perspective he didn't see the problem.

I don't think I'd nag if I were in a relationship where the other person gave the slightest crap about me to be honest. I'm fairly easy going.

Nothingbetter2d

if your woman wont put out you have several options

1. Have a ****

2. Use a Sex Toy

3. Hire a hooker or go find a slapper in Coppers

4. Dump her & go find a slapper in Coppers

Nothingbetter2d

Sykk wrote: »

My girlfriend NEVER nags.. ever.. She's not Irish if that helps? Or perhaps it's just that we're only together a year..

she probably does nag just you can't understand her language properly

Lawrence1895

Sykk wrote: »

My girlfriend NEVER nags.. ever.. She's not Irish if that helps? Or perhaps it's just that we're only together a year..

Mine is...and the rant usually starts with the words: 'Even me Ma says...' :rolleyes:

treborflynn

i prefer niggins in relationships.

Francie Barrett

Life is too short to have a partner who nags, why would you put up with it?

ihsb

I am a Queen at nagging. I am high maintenance, I don't care who knows it. Just I expect a certain level of cleanliness, effort put into the relationship, romance etc. And if it doesn't happen then I let it be known that I am not happy about it.

But I would say that it is not nagging, it is constructive criticism.

Quandary

ihsb wrote: »

I am a Queen at nagging. I am high maintenance, I don't care who knows it.

Well aren't you quite the catch!

Feeona

This thread still going? It's like one big nag of its own!

ihsb

Quandary wrote: »

Well aren't you quite the catch!

I really am. I am well worth the energy though;)

ArtSmart

god damn annoying N_ggers


(south park. honestly)

ArtSmart

ash23 wrote: »

I was accused of being a "nag" once by my ex....shortly before the demise of the relationship.
Sequence of events was it was coming up to christmas. We were both busy in work. He wanted to stay home for the holidays so I took the child down to see my family, 2 hours away. All I asked him to do was keep the house clean for the two days I was away.
I arrive back christmas eve morning. The place is a tip. I actually cried. I had to go and get everything organised for HIS parents coming to us for dinner the next day.
So I clean the house, do the shopping, prep the dinner for the next day, collect him from work, cook dinner for that night, put the child to bed after the santa ritual, wrap and assemble the presents and fall into bed. He was too "tired" after work to help.
Xmas day I make a special breakfast, entertain his family and feed them etc.
Stephens day we have his cousins, his parents and my parents to visit. I spend the day making tea and entertaining the parents while he sits on his hole all day playing PS3. He basically ignores our guests.
I'm dying for everyone to leave because I just want to spend the night relaxing because I'm back to work the next day. He announces his cousins are staying down and he's going out that night.
I flip out, eat the head off him and I'm called (and look like) a nag.

From his perspective he didn't see the problem.

I don't think I'd nag if I were in a relationship where the other person gave the slightest crap about me to be honest. I'm fairly easy going.

grand. as long as it's all demised. men under 35 should not be married to anyone, except playstation

ArtSmart

anyway, on a slightly more serious note - passive aggression or passive bullying is never good. that said my ex was a genius at the 'sad face, puppy dog eyes' thingy - far more effective, albeit the same thing.

apparently, in a healthy relationship, nagging isn't necessary. apparently. (something to do with being aware adults or some such nonsense)

pragmatic1

ihsb wrote: »

I am a Queen at nagging. I am high maintenance, I don't care who knows it. Just I expect a certain level of cleanliness, effort put into the relationship, romance etc. And if it doesn't happen then I let it be known that I am not happy about it.

But I would say that it is not nagging, it is constructive criticism.

You sound like a nightmare. No offense.

ihsb

pragmatic1 wrote: »

You sound like a nightmare. No offense.

Absolutely none taken

ArtSmart

pragmatic1 wrote: »

You sound like a nightmare. No offence.

you sound like a dick. no offence

ArtSmart

ihsb wrote: »

Absolutely none taken

ah, le mat? you sure you like a good aul nagging?

ArtSmart

pragmatic1 wrote: »

You sound like a nightmare. No offense.

i joshing. of course. *cough*

ihsb

ArtSmart wrote: »

ah, le mat? you sure you like a good aul nagging?

I only nag people that matter.

ArtSmart

ihsb wrote: »

I only nag people that matter.

ah. and you let the rest walk all over you?

nah, i joking really.


but pragmatic was either joking, or he really is a dick!

then again, i might be standing in between true love


(ie, mutually reinforcing destructive co-dependency syndrome)

edit: Well American Dad on, so back later.

Wibbs

Francie Barrett wrote: »

Life is too short to have a partner who nags, why would you put up with it?

Indeed. No pussy or dick is worth any level of crap that passes a certain point. That point is reached differently depending on the person involved. With the billions out there that may be a better match, why stick with someone who is a pain in the arse? Makes no sense. For either gender.

I've seen women put up with utter knobends to the same degree as men and it makes no sense to me. If she's a handwringing anal whiner that will never be satisfied and loves to express that on the basis that she has bewbs and a fanny? Eject! Eject! Eject! Half the worlds population are ladies and most aren't dissatisfied harpies. You will find better.

This goes for women too. If you're guy is a distant eejit, with all the emotional expressiveness of an Easter island statue with constipation and is lazier than a rock? Eject! Eject! Eject! Don't be afraid of being single. Don't be afraid of not being able to announce "x is my boyfriend" in company. Too common an issue and stress with the ladies. You too can find better.

Jen Pigs Fly

Because men just can't do what they're told :mad:

themadchef

ihsb wrote: »

I am a Queen at nagging. I am high maintenance, I don't care who knows it. Just I expect a certain level of cleanliness, effort put into the relationship, romance etc. And if it doesn't happen then I let it be known that I am not happy about it.

But I would say that it is not nagging, it is constructive criticism.

So, by your own terms to make it fair it would be acceptable for a bloke to be high maintenance, not care who knows it, expect you to maintain a certain standard of clenliness, make up etc, effort into the relationship, romance, and if it doesnt happen then he lets you know that he's not happy about it?

Jeeezzz

The pressure must be a pain in the hole. Especially at the start of a relationship Godammit, but that's some hot sex right there. After that? Well you need to be enjoying each other not bugging the holes off each other.

Nags are horses. Keep it in the field sista. (Bathroom wall material )

themadchef

xxxJennyxxx wrote: »

Because men just can't do what they're told :mad:

Jesus wept, they are not children, or pets.

Jen Pigs Fly

themadchef wrote: »

Jesus wept, they are not children, or pets.

Some of them act like children and feel they should be taken care of like pets though

themadchef

xxxJennyxxx wrote: »

Because men just can't do what they're told :mad:

xxxJennyxxx wrote: »

feel they should be taken care of like pets though

Youre treating them like pets, and complain that that want to be taken care of like pets............

Snowie

xxxJennyxxx wrote: »

Because men just can't do what they're told :mad:

god damm its not all about you princess


:pac:

empacher

I hate having my female housemates nagging me. They'll complain about everything. ''Your plates in the sitting room'' Well I am as well and that's clearly why when I move it'll come with me.

I don't go around nagging when they wake me up at 7am with there early morning pounding. Or at 4am when they come home pissed drunk. When I come home after work at 5am. I'm considerate enough to take my shoes off and tip toe to bed.

My main problem with naggy women is that they notice only bad things. They don't seem to notice, the food bin and dish washer is emptied every night, or that everything they've left on is turned off.

Giselle

ash23 wrote: »

I was accused of being a "nag" once by my ex....shortly before the demise of the relationship.
Sequence of events was it was coming up to christmas. We were both busy in work. He wanted to stay home for the holidays so I took the child down to see my family, 2 hours away. All I asked him to do was keep the house clean for the two days I was away.
I arrive back christmas eve morning. The place is a tip. I actually cried. I had to go and get everything organised for HIS parents coming to us for dinner the next day.
So I clean the house, do the shopping, prep the dinner for the next day, collect him from work, cook dinner for that night, put the child to bed after the santa ritual, wrap and assemble the presents and fall into bed. He was too "tired" after work to help.
Xmas day I make a special breakfast, entertain his family and feed them etc.
Stephens day we have his cousins, his parents and my parents to visit. I spend the day making tea and entertaining the parents while he sits on his hole all day playing PS3. He basically ignores our guests.
I'm dying for everyone to leave because I just want to spend the night relaxing because I'm back to work the next day. He announces his cousins are staying down and he's going out that night.
I flip out, eat the head off him and I'm called (and look like) a nag.

From his perspective he didn't see the problem.

I don't think I'd nag if I were in a relationship where the other person gave the slightest crap about me to be honest. I'm fairly easy going.

You should try never make yourself a martyr, because the chances are, someone will let you. He sounds like a selfish sod, you're well shot.

ash23

Giselle wrote: »

You should try never make yourself a martyr, because the chances are, someone will let you. He sounds like a selfish sod, you're well shot.

I didn't want to "ruin" Christmas.
By rights I should have just turned straight around and gone back to my own family for Christmas and let him explain to his parents why there was no dinner and no me and no child

Valuable lessons learned.

Abi

Seomra Mushie wrote: »

There are some gender stereotypes I hate but this one, I'm happy to concur with. Women nag, I'm sorry, we just do.

Speak for yourself. I'd never nag a man to do anything, ever.

One thing I love is that we do things around the place without saying anything to the other, but often join in and help each other out. If you truly love someone you don't take advantage or treat them as a slave. Basic chores become enjoyable when there's no pressure, just a respect for each other and a pride in your own little 'castle'.