Are you an alcoholic?

Seachmall

So, I'm giving up drinking (for a short while anyway) for various reasons. One of them is not that I'm an alcoholic, well, at least I didn't think I was. However, according to about.com's test, based on a test from Johns Hopkins University Hospital, I have definite signs that my drinking patterns are harmful and I show signs of being an alcoholic.


Here's the test.

It only takes a minute to do.

I got 4 yeses which apparently mean I'm at least leading down a bad road, although to me it seems like a lot gotcha questions, i.e. so general that you have to answer yes (although that could be my inner alcoholic rationalising!).

So how do you fare up? Are you an alco?

cocoshovel

I drink like once a month....maybe 4 - 6 cans on my own.....I answered 4 of the questions with yes, and it says I show definite signs of being an alcoholic :rolleyes:

Nothingbetter2d

what a load of horse crap

here is my test result

You answered 5 items out of 20 Yes.

Your score is 25%. According to the Office of Health Care Programs, Johns Hopkins University Hospital, developers of this screening quiz, if you answered 3 of these questions with a Yes it is a definite sign that your drinking patterns are harmful and possibly considered alcohol dependent or alcoholic. You may want to seek an evaluation by a healthcare professional.

i scored 25% but it still says im an alcoholic... i enjoy a drink or two but i can easily go out and not drink too. this test is totally biased in favour of the anti drinking lobbists

chin_grin

Good f*cking Christ. When will the media realise that it's up to an individuals tolerance of alcohol?

Of course it gets a bad name from the kids not being able to handle it or take it responsibly hence these late night shows about policemen/women dealing with drunk and rowdy people so the older generations can go "Yeah, alcohol is at fault here.....I told you."

If you need it to get through your day, then I'd say you've a problem and need to seek help. If you like to have a can an odd evening then you're fine.

LeinsterDub

There is no accounting for time in this so the longer you've been drink the more chances you'll have to answer yes to some of these got you questions

BigBrownBear

Unless your drinking is affecting your

• Health
• Finances
• Relationships
• Job Performance
• Mood/Self Esteem
  
  You're NOT an alcoholic

shopaholic01

Seachmall wrote: »

So, I'm giving up drinking (for a short while anyway) for various reasons. One of them is not that I'm an alcoholic, well, at least I didn't think I was. However, according to about.com's test, based on a test from Johns Hopkins University Hospital, I have definite signs that my drinking patterns are harmful and I show signs of being an alcoholic.


Here's the test.

It only takes a minute to do.

I got 4 yeses which apparently mean I'm at least leading down a bad road, although to me it seems like a lot gotcha questions, i.e. so general that you have to answer yes (although that could be my inner alcoholic rationalising!).

So how do you fare up? Are you an alco?

It would appear I am, answered yes to 5.
Question is how many people would actually answer yes to less than 3 of them?

haminka

I think some of the questions are quite unclear in the way they are asked. I think they relate more to long-term problems as a result of someone's drinking rather than having had trouble sleeping/feel sorry after you had a boozy night out 12 years ago.

Fromthetrees

It seems I am.
Only in Ireland can you binge drink 3 times a week and nobody thinks you have a problem, if you binge drink 6 or 7 days a week somebody might say hmm I think your man is quite fond of a drink.

no

PseudoFamous

"Has your ambition decreased since you began drinking?"

Well, yes, but I don't think that my ambition was directly related to drinking in the first place. Hell, my ambition has decreased since I began playing videogames, too.

Knasher

I haven't drank anything since New Years, simply because I couldn't be bothered. Apparently I am exhibiting "definite signs that your drinking patterns are harmful and possibly considered alcohol dependent or alcoholic."

Umm okay, thanks for that.

DrumSteve

I've a drinking problem.

I can't afford beer.

Mickey Dazzler

These tests are bullcrap, mind you it was confined to me in the Rutland centre the I am a "rip roaring" alcoholic!! Said I would be dead by now. Idiots, what do they know..... mines a cherry please.

themadchef

chin_grin wrote: »

If you like to have a can an odd evening then you're fine.

.. and what if you wake up hugging said can?

I dunno, some people have a very blurry (ahem) opinion on where the line is Chinny

Nothingbetter2d

shopaholic01 wrote: »

It would appear I am, answered yes to 5.
Question is how many people would actually answer yes to less than 3 of them?

lol with a username such as "shopaholic" buying booze must be a really hard habit to break

Morrisseeee

Only in the evenings...............;)

ghostchant

I would have a couple (and I literally mean a couple) of drinks about once a month when out with friends. Most of the time I wouldn't drink at all when out. Still got 3 out of 20 on that test due to drunken nights out back in college. According to the quiz I also have harmful drinking patterns.

Lawrence1895

I have no problem with alcohol, only without

NTC

i amswered yes to 3 of the questions and it told me

You answered 3 items out of 20 Yes.

Your score is 15%. According to the Office of Health Care Programs, Johns Hopkins University Hospital, developers of this screening quiz, if you answered 3 of these questions with a Yes it is a definite sign that your drinking patterns are harmful and possibly considered alcohol dependent or alcoholic. You may want to seek an evaluation by a healthcare professional.

Total crap!

Seachmall

AH is starting to make a lot more sense to me now that I know it's full of degenerate alcoholics.


Ye're all a fucking disgrace, I think I need a can to settle me nerves.

Lawrence1895

What else was it? I don't drink that much, my hands are too shaky, I spill most of it

chin_grin

themadchef wrote: »

.. and what if you wake up hugging said can?

I dunno, some people have a very blurry (ahem) opinion on where the line is Chinny

Once it's the same can and not the end of a tray! Yeah, that blur is because society and the media have made people like to judge things and have an opinion on sh!t they shouldn't have.

I'm not going to repeat my point here about personal tolerance, but that's what it is. Once you're not hiding vodka around the house or having liquid lunches.

cynder

Alcoholism Screening Quiz








You answered 1 items out of 20 Yes.

Your score is 5%. According to the Office of Health Care Programs, Johns Hopkins University Hospital, developers of this screening quiz, if you answered 3 of these questions with a Yes it is a definite sign that your drinking patterns are harmful and possibly considered alcohol dependent or alcoholic. You may want to seek an evaluation by a healthcare professional.



I drink at most 15 units






a YEAR!

I answered yes to it affecting my sleep, if i have 1 glass of wine i cant sleep.......

cork_buoy

I think you should only use those websites as indicators and if you value your physical and mental health as well as those important to you, you'll ask the advice of an expert. I didn't do moderation very well at all...

I was drinking about 5-9 pints on a Friday evening depending on what mood I was in and what the craic was like in the village. I might follow up with a few on a Saturday or a Sunday and in rare cases maybe even both. I found that I would get drunk when I went out for a few pints more often then not so I decided I would call a halt to it. I just had enough of the hangovers, pissy moods and not spending enough time with loved ones at the weekend. I don't think I was an alcoholic but I do believe that my drinking habits were having a negative effect on my physical and mental health.

I gave up for a month and the difference for me was enormous. I experienced increased energy, improved mood and a few quid each week. Keeping in mind that I have a family with young children I decided to stay off the booze. I'll have a few on occasions like for example a wedding but I'll give the pub a skip at the weekend now. I'm not preaching (at least this is not my intention)... just saying that it has had an overall positive effect on our lives and if you think you're drinking too much try stopping for a while to see how it affects you. You may be pleasantly surprised.

Mickeroo

I was told by someone recently that over half the people who drink in ireland are defined alcoholics. I have no idea what a defined alcoholic is though.

Kaner2004

I drink less than even a pint a month. Firstly because I would rather have the car, secondly because it gives me heartburn. Thirdly I couldnt care less whether I drink alco or miwadi.


Q: Is drinking affecting your reputation?

Yes. Because people are starting to suspect i am an alcoholic as being the reason I dont drink much.

Q: Have you ever felt remorse after drinking?

Yes. Once when I got sick 25 years ago during rag week at uni.

Q: Has your ambition decreased since drinking?

Yes. It decreases with age.

Q: Does drinking cause you to have difficulty in sleeping?

Yes. I get mad indigestion and cant sleep after a pint.

Q: Has your efficiency decreased since drinking?

Yes. As I get older.

Q: Have you ever had a loss of memory as a result of drinking?

Yes. 25 years ago during rag week at uni.


So obviously I am a alcoholic.

Baneblade

replace alcohol with caffeine while doing the quiz and see how many would also affect you

shopaholic01

Nothingbetter2d wrote: »

lol with a username such as "shopaholic" buying booze must be a really hard habit to break

It is. Unfortunately drinking said booze is an even harder habit to break

Paulie Gualtieri

No! who have you been talkin to ??? , Im just thirsty all the time and water just doesnt do it for me.

Mickeroo

I'm an alcoholic too apparently, I drink on average once every month or 2.

The Big Red Button

Kaner2004 wrote: »

I drink less than even a pint a month. Firstly because I would rather have the car, secondly because it gives me heartburn. Thirdly I couldnt care less whether I drink alco or miwadi.


Q: Is drinking affecting your reputation?

Yes. Because people are starting to suspect i am an alcoholic as being the reason I dont drink much.

Q: Have you ever felt remorse after drinking?

Yes. Once when I got sick 25 years ago during rag week at uni.

Q: Has your ambition decreased since drinking?

Yes. It decreases with age.

Q: Does drinking cause you to have difficulty in sleeping?

Yes. I get mad indigestion and cant sleep after a pint.

Q: Has your efficiency decreased since drinking?

Yes. As I get older.

Q: Have you ever had a loss of memory as a result of drinking?

Yes. 25 years ago during rag week at uni.


So obviously I am a alcoholic.

But it does say, at the start of the test, to use the past twelve months as a timeframe ...

SunnyDub1

Seachmall wrote: »

So, I'm giving up drinking (for a short while anyway) for various reasons. One of them is not that I'm an alcoholic, well, at least I didn't think I was. However, according to about.com's test, based on a test from Johns Hopkins University Hospital, I have definite signs that my drinking patterns are harmful and I show signs of being an alcoholic.


Here's the test.

It only takes a minute to do.

I got 4 yeses which apparently mean I'm at least leading down a bad road, although to me it seems like a lot gotcha questions, i.e. so general that you have to answer yes (although that could be my inner alcoholic rationalising!).

So how do you fare up? Are you an alco?

This is a load of crap :rolleyes: if you answer one question you will prob be accused of becoming an alcoholic

Funglegunk

I'm a functioning alcoholic who is slowly realising that drinking until you get absolutely useless is kind of a waste of money. Getting old I suppose.

amacachi

The criteria for being an alcoholic are like a woman looking for a row. "Go a while without, just to see if you can." "OK." "Aha! That's one of the signs!"

frozenfrozen

i was too drunk to answer the questions

SteoL

Denial, one of the first stages of alcoholism

ScumLord

That test is a bollox so I smacked it in the jaw.

stovelid

The craving thing is a bit ambiguous. Of course I crave a drink at weekends. Like I crave coffee in the morning or sex after hearing Gemmma Hayes.

saa

I'm Irish.

Malari

This "drinking alone" thing crops up all the time. Getting drunk alone is different to drinking alone. So if I have a glass of wine cooking dinner some nights before my boyfriend gets home it's a danger sign?! If he has a beer while he's doing a bit of DIY in the evening before while I'm out it's a symptom? :mad:

hurling11

Alcoholism Screening Quiz

You answered 12 items out of 20 Yes.

Your score is 60%. According to the Office of Health Care Programs, Johns Hopkins University Hospital, developers of this screening quiz, if you answered as few as 3 of these questions with a Yes it is a definite sign that your drinking patterns are harmful and considered alcohol dependent or alcoholic. Since you answered more than half of these questions Yes you should definitely seek an evaluation by a healthcare professional as soon as possible

I went out saturday night, sunday night, and monday until about eight o clock, answered the majority of these questions in the last weekend..:(.think i'll go off the beer for a while...

suicide_circus

Kaner2004 wrote: »

I drink less than even a pint a month. Firstly because I would rather have the car, secondly because it gives me heartburn. Thirdly I couldnt care less whether I drink alco or miwadi.


Q: Is drinking affecting your reputation?

Yes. Because people are starting to suspect i am an alcoholic as being the reason I dont drink much.

Q: Have you ever felt remorse after drinking?

Yes. Once when I got sick 25 years ago during rag week at uni.

Q: Has your ambition decreased since drinking?

Yes. It decreases with age.

Q: Does drinking cause you to have difficulty in sleeping?

Yes. I get mad indigestion and cant sleep after a pint.

Q: Has your efficiency decreased since drinking?

Yes. As I get older.

Q: Have you ever had a loss of memory as a result of drinking?

Yes. 25 years ago during rag week at uni.


So obviously I am a alcoholic.

You're in denial. You're a filthy stinkin thundering alco and it's tearing your family apart.

juan.kerr

Seachmall wrote: »

So how do you fare up? Are you an alco?

No.

WoollyRedHat

I think we may need to rename After Hours to Alcoholics Anoymous?

Or just Happy Hours.

Fizman

I haven't drank in 65 days!

/High-fives himself.

wobbles-grogan

From the quiz site thing wrote:

You answered 20 items out of 20 Yes.

Your score is 100%. According to the Office of Health Care Programs, Johns Hopkins University Hospital, developers of this screening quiz, if you answered as few as 3 of these questions with a Yes it is a definite sign that your drinking patterns are harmful and considered alcohol dependent or alcoholic. Since you answered all of these questions Yes you should definitely seek an evaluation by a healthcare professional as soon as possible

No **** sherlock... :pac:

super_furry

I'm an Irish social drinker, which translates to an American alcoholic.

ScumLord

Fizman wrote: »

I haven't drank in 65 days!

/High-fives himself.

According to this test your still an alcoholic.

some random drunk

I only answered yes to 2 out of 20 or 10%. Maybe I should change my username....

In all seriousness though, that test is ridiculously strict, and the questions are too vague for it to be a reliable indicator that you have a drinking problem.

yosemite_sam

I probably am, I drink two nights a week but never leave when I should