Horrible things you've done under the influence

TeddyTedson

Saw a bloke in the queue for a very successful Dublin nightclub be approached by a drunken homeless man asking for change.
He was most definitely a heroin user.
He had a half bottle of vodka on him and the bloke in the queue offered him a few quid for it.
They did the deal and the guy drank the vodka straight out of the bottle.
Nasty as fook!

I could just never drink that.
Obviously alcohol alters your awareness and everything like that but even in my worst states that's something I'd just never do.
Just wondering if any boardies have any good stories of such events? (Because I certainly didn't )

Ghandee

I kissed a girl and I liked it:eek:

It tasted of her cherry chap stick!

Doc Ruby

Posted on boards once, got banned from AH, and that takes some doing.

Deus Ex Machina

I once had a roasting sweaty hairy **** over Jade Goody's tits in Hello magazine at 4:00 am after a night of striking out.

The Internet Explorer

Brick.

IM0

Ghandee wrote: »

I kissed a girl and I liked it:eek:

It tasted of her cherry chap stick!

is this the new competition for firing ping pong balls now

Brendog

stole a load of drinks and ripped my top in half and walked home topless wearing my t-shirt scarf...






.....uuurrrgggg :mad:

The King of Moo

Talked at length about Arthurian legends.

hairyprincess

I'd say the most horrible thing I've done is talk to God on the big white telephone.
Did and talked some funny **** though

Mint Sauce

Wouldn't say she was horrible......

TeddyTedson

Yes yes my ma! I get it already. How many times....


...wait:p

Guill

Debated the theory of evolution and how isn't everything just a theory?
NO?
But all we see is a 2d representation of a 3D object, so how can we be sure what things look like? All science is technically just a very best guess so everything is a theory. Therefore evolution is a theory, as is gravity.
When you see an orange and i see an orange do we both see it as the same colour? If a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound? No, because sound is just our ear drums vibrating due to ripples in the air, the ripples are there but no ear drums = no sound....
Should all ugly people be sterilised? Should all 'evil' people be sterilised? What is evil? Isn't my opinion of it just what i have been taught?



And so on until 8am.

Bipolar Joe

The King of Moo wrote: »

Talked at length about Arthurian legends.

I would hang with you, King. You're my type of person.

I have no answer, just a few funny stories.

herisson

basically dry humped one of the buskers on Grafton Street one night...not my finest moment

destroyed a couch, lamp, locker and curtains also

Immaculate Pasta

I once fell asleep at the hotel bar after drinking for three quarters of an hour (we were drinking ladyboys) with two former work colleagues while we were filming a corporate boat video. While drunk I then wondered off into the kitchens to cook all the food. Then I went back into my room and was sick everywhere and fell asleep standing up leaning against my sink for 8 hours. After I woke up, I walked downstairs to have breakfast and didn't even wash my hands. And why? Because I'm a ruddy bloke :cool:

herisson

i also fell asleep in a phonebox and on a strange guy in a nightclub!

mackg

A mate of mine won a bottle of buckfast off a homeless guy one night in an arm wrestling match.

I have a friend who has a habit of taking shits in the middle of public roads.

dazzlemoo

Myself and the OH were in a country pub one day and I was drinking red wine, which I hadn't had before..Next thing, I'm rushing out to the Ladies to vomit but I didn't make the toilet and vommed into the sink.
Worst thing was..I was the only woman in the pub at the time so they would have known it was me.

Millicent

I once slept in a shed. No fucking clue how I managed to get over the lawnmower and tools and shit to sleep on an old busted couch because when I tried to get back in there sober to retrieve my shoes, I snotted myself.

mackg

Millicent wrote: »

I once slept in a shed. No fucking clue how I managed to get over the lawnmower and tools and shit to sleep on an old busted couch because when I tried to get back in there sober to retrieve my shoes, I snotted myself.

Reminds me, I once slept in the boot of a Ford Fiesta, arched over the spare tyre covered in my own puke. The following morning I got a lift home off my mom, aunt and uncle who had just come from church. That was a low point.

brummytom

Danced with a 50 year old woman

Got off with a 60 year old woman

Numerous drunken texts

Told a girl I could see her fanny

Pissed in my mom's wardrobe

Fell asleep on the bar, losing my passport in the process

Argued I could finish a crate. Doing so, being locked in the garden to sober up and falling asleep against the back door.

Poured a drink over my friend's head in the middle of Cavan Main St then had an incredibly poor scrap

Texting a lad I don't particularly like 'You're ridiculously gay'

Turned down sex, numerous times

Acquired many items of clothing I still have. Including a hat, sunglasses, 3D glasses, a Guinness Hat and a watch

Sang to my friend, wearing a back to front cap shouting 'I'M

DENIS CAHILL'

Sang 'I Useta Lover' in a session. Forgot the words and screamed

Probably far more that no one's willing to tell me.

skinny90

round 5ish in a hotel in louth i had an aul walk around the place....all of a sudden i found myself in a store room full of alcohol,crates,bottles of wine/champagne, the whole works.lets just say the case was full to the brim with all sorts....silly hotel:cool:

Princess Peach

• Vommed on the bathroom floor.
  
• Vommed on the kitchen table
  
• Vommed on a bouncer's shoe.
  
• Molested many a bouncer
  
• Asked a Chinese girl how she felt towards the Mongolians.
  
• Stole a guy's tie.
  
• Stole a guy's hat
  
• Stole a few drinks
  
• Kissed too many boys in the same club on the same night
  
• Allowed myself to be molested by my brother's 40 year old married friend
  
• Showed a vibrator I had won at an Ann Summers party to an entire nightclub
  
• Smoked the lit end of a cigarette

Does admitting it absolve my sins????

fkt

I think I'd have the police around pretty rapidly if I answered this honestly. I'm not even joking. Sad memories.

Millicent

A friend of mine's crowning glory was when she put her head under the bar, puked down her front, then went home and changed into a green top and red trousers before heading back out to the nightclub. :pac:

castletownman

I've done a lot of crazy stuff when I've been drunk but probably the most horrible thing that I've done is probably when I fingered a girl outside the local nightclub before crossing the road to the chipper and eating my friend's chips with the same hand!

Where To

Made nuisance phone calls to the Vatican at the time Pope John Paul II was dying!!


. . . . From the phone at work


. . . . . To entertain a bar full of customers


. . . . . Amazingly I didn't get the sack

44leto

Spit my mcDonalds coke on the ground splashing but a sergeant Ban Gardai stepped out in it's path, I really did not see her there behind the pillar at the GPO.

She got me aside her male junior was smirking and I apologised to the point of crawling and she told me to go on.

superblu

castletownman wrote: »

I've done a lot of crazy stuff when I've been drunk but probably the most horrible thing that I've done is probably when I fingered a girl outside the local nightclub before crossing the road to the chipper and eating my friend's chips with the same hand!

Quality....

Millicent

The last time I ever got drunk was a few years ago on my birthday--the first I had spent with my now long-term boyfriend. After drinking some crazy Polish vodka with what appeared to be a stalk of grass in it and whatever free drinks were shoved at me, I ended up very drunk in a taxi rank, complaining that I wanted a burger.

My boyfriend turned to a friend of mine, who told him it was very sweet that he had finally caved and got me one, to which he replied he didn't. He turned to see me horsing into a burger with its owner (who turned out to be a neighbour I had never met and thankfully never have again) beside me looking crestfallen as I nommed.

He then shoved me into a taxi as quickly as possible, where I told the taxi driver (who I knew very well) to fuck off when he told me not to vomit. (I'm usually polite to the point of being a doormat.)

He got me home and I proceeded to lock myself in the bathroom, puke, then cry. As my boyfriend was knocking on the door to help me, I slipped on the puke and fall into the bathtub and cried some more.

Surprisingly, more than five years later, we're still going out!

superblu

I tried to get into the bed with my owld lad after being out on the beer

mackg

Me and a few of the lads went on a bit of a piss up during the day coming up to Christmas one year when we were younger, got a rake of cheap booze and got vurry bad. It must have been really early in the day because it was still bright when we headed back to one of my friends houses more than likely in search of more booze. We walked past his next door neighbours house and one of the lads staggered into their garden, we turned to tell him to cop on only to see him hunched over in the garden getting sick and behind him looking on in horror in the front room of the house was the whole of the next door family gathered around decorating their Christmas tree. Priceless, but awful at the same time.

Great thread, potential to be the most entertaining one around these parts in a while.:)

I broke my arse laughing at Princess Peaches thing about the Mongolians. Also Brummytom what do you mean "get off" with a 60 year old?

Kimia

Puked all over myself and the bf (and possibly the people in front of me) on the top deck of a bus on the way home. Puke, everywhere, it was like something out of the exorcist. Vodka was the culprit.

Princess Peach

There's actually a few things I'm afraid to post because I will be judged.

In After Hours!! That's bad!

Smidge

I'm surprised no-one has mentioned peeing in wardrobes, fireplaces etc
Men obviously:D

Princess Peach

brummytom wrote: »

Pissed in my mom's wardrobe

mishkalucy wrote: »

I'm surprised no-one has mentioned peeing in wardrobes, fireplaces etc
Men obviously:D

Previous page :pac:

Rothko

Princess Peach wrote: »

• Vommed on the bathroom floor.
• Vommed on the kitchen table
• Vommed on a bouncer's shoe.
• Molested many a bouncer
• Asked a Chinese girl how she felt towards the Mongolians.
• Stole a guy's tie.
• Stole a guy's hat
• Stole a few drinks
• Kissed too many boys in the same club on the same night
• Allowed myself to be molested by my brother's 40 year old married friend
• Showed a vibrator I had won at an Ann Summers party to an entire nightclub
• Smoked the lit end of a cigarette

Does admitting it absolve my sins????

I hope that wasn't all in the same night! :eek:

Smidge

Feck

KeithM89_old

Got into a taxi that wasnt a taxi, had an argument with the driver then puked on the floor.

Princess Peach

KeithM89 wrote: »

Got into a taxi that wasnt a taxi, had an argument with the driver then puked on the floor.

Only one???

Millicent

KeithM89 wrote: »

Got into a taxi that wasnt a taxi, had an argument with the driver then puked on the floor.

You classy bastard, you! :pac:

KeithM89_old

Princess Peach wrote: »

Only one???

Im not mentioning any other incidents

The Snipe

My ex.....

mickrock

My hobby is collecting used fanny pads.

Sometimes when I get drunk I leave them in car doors, for a laugh.

Wompa1

Went home with a girl, went out with her for two years and then she cheated on me. Not too funny but that's it

Susie_Q

Walked into a friend's bedroom where she was having sex with her boyfriend, shouting at them "THIS IS NOT A MOON" really angrily and then left the room. Woke up in a wardrobe wearing my friend's tshirt upside down which is a feat in itself. Not sure why I slept there - there was a bed about 4 feet away.

Gummy Panda

You all have drinking problems

abouttobebanned

I slept in the Christmas Tree one Christmas Eve.

Mr.Crinklewood

Pixie-Fairy wrote: »

basically dry humped one of the buskers on Grafton Street one night...not my finest moment

destroyed a couch, lamp, locker and curtains also

Did you just do this Once? If so I think they named a film after it.

Ms. Pingui

Puked in the middle of a busy petrol station forecourt in broad daylight.

Sat on the floor of a country pub crying and smashing numerous glasses of water that people were trying to feed me. Eventually I got kicked out and had to be carried a few miles home through a forest by a guy in my class that I barely knew. Got put to bed but kept getting up to tell said guy that I loved him and then puked everywhere. This was in a dorm style college and I think I was the only one drunk that night. Ended up going out with that guy for 3 years!

Went on a rodeo bull thing in the middle of a night club in a very short dress.

Kissed too many fellas in one night.

Puked in a mc donalds bag in the back of my dads car.

Dragged a guy I hardly know to the chipper really early in the night and made him b uy food for me AND my sister who wasn't even with us.

Threw potatoes at Limerick scumbag's car's when we ran out of eggs.

Lost loads of shoes.

Loads more when I think of em!

ziggy23

Where do I start:o I've said and done a lot of things I shouldn't have while drunk, mainly falling over at the wrong time. One that stands out is falling off the windowsill Mrs Doyle style. That hurt too:(

Putting in an ex boyfriend's windows (he deserved it really and truly!) a long time ago and spending the night in a cell prob being the worst