Horrible things you've done under the influence

Sunnyisland

While living in portugal, got so drunk one night woke up the next day in spain :-)

MadameGascar

A guard gave out to me for swearing so I ran away with his hat.:(

SunnyDub1

• got sick in a taxi (next morning had to pay a fine and also had to pay for my friends dress to be dry cleaned) - very expensive night :P

• You know the people that sit in the toilets with perfume,deodorant etc and look for money when you use their stuff ??well one night I got sick all over sick all over all her supplies. Bi*tch try to tell me I destroyed €120 worth of goods :rolleyes: - another expensive night

• Declared my love one night to this complete randomer telling him he looked like brad Pitt (he did not look like brad Pitt at all -beer goggles) few days later I was informed it was a friend of mines cousin - awkward

Sunnyisland

:o I also when much younger and after coming out of madigan's in talbot st,decided to have a pee against one of the statues in o'connell st, Needless to say a guarda wasn't impressed nor was a judge when i was convicted of exposing myself in a public place :o:o

Gillo

Had an argument with a taxi out the Four Seasons over why he wouldn't take me to town. Two ford mondeo's with blacked out windows and neither would take me. After a short argument it turned out they were an armed garda escort for some foreign dignitary staying in the hotel.

The grossest had to be a different night in a different hotel, got hammered and my bro ended up putting me to bed, apparently I asked him for a loan of a pen so stick in my mouth do I could make myself sick. I do vaguely remember puking in the bed, then figuring if I lay down in some really weird position I'd stay dry!!

Kinda glad now I don't really drink anymore.

neil_hosey

drove to scotland at 5 in the morning

Vicxas

I got absolutely hammered one night and proceeded to go to Supermacs and tell everone that i would tell them they have a beautiful face if they would let me eat their burger.


My finest moment i think....

Big Nasty

Something like this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KXCxojmnmgo

castletownman

I just remembered another time when I arrived home from a 21st at seven in the morning after drinking whiskey at the after party and was in the horrors. Anyway I woke up a few hours later in my own bed, covered in my own vomit with my dog casually licking up the more desirable looking chunks. Haven't touched whiskey since.

El Siglo

- Pissed in many phone boxes around Dublin,
- Slept on a bus shelter bench which I managed to stain with sick,
- Helped an old homeless alcoholic to beg,
- Sick on a bus,
- Pissed into an empty can on a bus,
- Sick at the bar in tramco,
- Started a fist fight with my brother,
- Shouted at a black man; "What up nigga?!"
- Broke a bottle on the ground in Purty Kitchen and shouted "Mazel tov!" followed by calling the bouncers anti-semites for escorting me out because of my 'Jewish heritage'.
- Ended up out in Poleglass (West Belfast, very rough worse than Jobstown).

Paparazzo

Spend an hour trying to walk through a hedge when it would have taken 30 seconds to walk around it.
Climbed out a 3rd floor window, around a pillar, and back in a differenet window.
Held my mate by the ankles as we dangled him over the liffey quay walls.
Slept overnight on a pitch and putt course.
Gave a girl a hickey on her face.


My mate did a class one when he was locked. Someone asked him for a smoke, he gave him his entire packet of smokes and £30. That was all his money and he ended up having to walk home. Another took a shít off a balcony and fell off in the process. There's a great photo of him in the on the ground asleep in garden with his pants down covered in shíte.

AngryBollix

I was removed from a ryanair flight in Manchester for being drunk.

Sometimes when you are screaming drunk you can make yourself sound sober. I did that before boarding the flight and managed to take a seat. While on the flight I wrapped the seat buckle in knots. Before we boarded the flight there were cans of beer being handed out. So I opened mine and started to drink it but didnt finish it. So instead of leaving the can behind I put it in my pocket. Half of the beer had spilled onto my jeans making it look like I had pissed myself.

upandcumming

Went on the Four Loko in NY and then onto one of the Irish places off Times Square. 4 hours of drinking there after the Four Loko and after getting sick in two taxis, then getting kicked out of a third one for getting sick outside the door, I plonk myself down on Madison only to woken by a cop at around 7.30am. Death would have been a sweet release!

Paparazzo

My mate stole 2 euro off a child.

rambutman

Puked in all sorts of places
Shat myself after someone challenged me to drink 20 pints of guiness in college - got to 19
Pished meself in many's a location
Rode many a minger
Rode a few mates girlfriends (terrible i know)

Rode one of me mothers mates

Joy-rode and wrote off a car

Got in a few scraps

Got drunk - woke up on a flight to Bangkok

Got drunk on ferry - woke up in A & E in North Wales - when they asked me "Mr Rambutman have you taken any drugs" i thought they were talking about during my life so replied "YAH......speed, pills, coke, smack, acid " and fell back asleep - cue large dosages of anti-opiate antagonists until i eventually woke up REALLY high because all the drugs they have given me had nothing to work on.

Married a ho

But worst off all smashed my kids money box to get funds for d early house
I gave up drink after this one

vangoz

I tried cutting sound cables of a terrible obsequiously loud band that were playing in the local, but I cut the video cables to all the TV's instead. Someone one spotted me and I was kindly told the next morning never to show my face there again...... was worth it!!!

Paparazzo

rambutman wrote: »

But worst off all smashed my kids money box to get funds for d early house
I gave up drink after this one

Think we have a winner. Good to see you're off the drink after that one!

SunnyDub1

rambutman wrote: »

Rode many a minger
Rode a few mates girlfriends (terrible i know)
Rode one of me mothers mates

It's stifler from american pie :rolleyes:

rambutman

Paparazzo wrote: »

Think we have a winner. Good to see you're off the drink after that one!

Yep it was definitely one of my lowest points....which is some achievement.....some sort of a wake up call..............almost a year ago now

Duff

SunnyDub1 wrote: »

It's stifler from american pie :rolleyes:

I think you mean Jay from Inbetweeners?

petes

Shagged a mates girlfriend on three separate occasions.

Duff

Insurgent wrote: »

Shagged a mates girlfriend on three separate occasions.

Who? I might know her?

petes

Duff wrote: »

Who? I might know her?

Eh don't think I'll be saying anything!!!

Flaker

God so many.....most years ago though thank goodness!

Was snogging some young lad at a nightclub that was out in the sticks. We were so busy we missed the bus home. First we tried to sleep in the ditch. Wasn't happening so walked to the nearest wee town/village and saw someone had left their front door open so we went in and slept on their hall carpet. We scarpered fairly early the next morning so thank god they didn't find us!

Can think of loads more but couldn't be bothered typing them. Enjoying all the rest though. The one with the bloke fingering the girl then eating his friend's chips is pretty gross though....

Funglegunk

Argued with a Chinese man asking him who the hell he was and why he was in my apartment. Turns out I was on the wrong floor.

Picked up a girl fireman's lift style to carry her from her taxi to the door on a very rainy night, dropped her in a big mucky puddle. Also did something similar with an ex and bruised her arse.

Woke up in what seemed like mid-ride in a hotel room with yer one's dog jumping all over the bed, had to lock it in the bathroom. She didn't even speak any English (not sure how I ended up there), turns out she was some rich Chinese guys wife as she dropped me off to work in a Porsche Cayenne.

Heartily slapped some extremely sunburnt girls back a number of times in Spain. Surprised her bf didn't hit me a box tbh.

I've got plenty more I'm sure.

carolmarx

Passed out on a railway track..

Millicent

carolmarx wrote: »

Passed out on a railway track..

Lol! Potential Darwin award there, definitely! Was it an active track?

rain on

Around the time Tesco were doing 3 boxes of Stella for €15 a few of us drove up the country somewhere for a gig. I had a bit of a sick out the back of the pub, went to sleep it off in the van, woke up needing to get sick, couldn't get the door of the van open so got sick all over the inside of the van. Then after trying a bit more I got the door open and got sick in the middle of the main street of whatever town it was. I feel like all of that town has seen me being sick now. Can't touch Stella since then.

Gin Fizz

Poured a pint of beer over another girl just because l thought she looked sad:o

jaspertheghost

jaysus to many things to mention...the stupidest thing i done was walked home along a dual carrage way got tired and slept in a roadsign triangle thing...passed it a few days later and the thing was after being crushed by a truck!!

CavanCrew

Beer bonged a lot of raw vodka, ended the night by vomiting blood all over the gaf and having to be stripped and put in the shower, all I remember is verbally abusing a man with long hair.

clashburke

• extremely drunk one night and got kicked out of the night club..:oi then some how ended up on a back road somewhere looking for said town!!turns out i was walking the wrong way for 3hours:(:(

• sick in places

• pissed loads of places

• sleepen in the middle of the road til some one gave me a lift

• drank half bottle of brandy after a night out and proceeded to talk to the hot-tank, while telling the father to **** off interrupting me!!:pac:

Aoifey!

• Vomited on the kitchen floor
• Vomited in the shower
• Vomited on a bar
• Vomited on my brother's roommate's laptop
• Tried to break into my neighbour's apartment because I was convinced he "needed air"
• Broke the shower curtain (including bending the bar that holds it up) of a guy I barely knew
• Shouted "They don't understand, they're only Chinese!!" when my friend told me to stop crying because some Chinese people were walking by

There are so many more I have blocked out of my memory.

cojomo2

mackg wrote: »

I have a friend who has a habit of taking shits in the middle of public roads.

Do I know you?

tripe man

castletownman wrote: »

I've done a lot of crazy stuff when I've been drunk but probably the most horrible thing that I've done is probably when I fingered a girl outside the local nightclub before crossing the road to the chipper and eating my friend's chips with the same hand!

If he was an average-looking Irish male he'd be delighted at that because it's the only taste of gee he's likely to get in this country!!!

Kiith

Smashed the back windscreen of a car with a Christmas tree in Prague in June

MadameGascar

tripe man wrote: »

If he was an average-looking Irish male he'd be delighted at that because it's the only taste of gee he's likely to get in this country!!!

That's a dreadful thing to say.

Funglegunk

MadameGascar wrote: »

That's a dreadful thing to say.

And incorrect.

Squarewave

Princess Peach wrote: »

Asked a Chinese girl how she felt towards the Mongolians.

Funglegunk wrote: »

Argued with a Chinese man asking him who the hell he was and why he was in my apartment. Turns out I was on the wrong floor.

Woke up in what seemed like mid-ride in a hotel room with yer one's dog jumping all over the bed, had to lock it in the bathroom. She didn't even speak any English (not sure how I ended up there), turns out she was some rich Chinese guys wife as she dropped me off to work in a Porsche Cayenne.

Aoifey! wrote: »

Shouted "They don't understand, they're only Chinese!!" when my friend told me to stop crying because some Chinese people were walking by

The Chinese seem to bear the brunt of drunk Irish people

tripe man

Funglegunk wrote: »

And incorrect.

Care to elaborate on how it's incorrect so I can disprove you..

Feisar

Puked.

Crawled through a river of puke to get back to where I puked

Rolled around in a flower patch

Insulted people

Had sex with girls - this is a whole sub topic in itself

Kissed loads of girls in one night, once I tasted puke of a girl but was too drunk to care

Ate McDonalds/Burger King/etc.

Ran about a hotel naked where I worked only to be seen on camera by the owner

Made a tit of myself at a wedding and ruined the GF's night

Treated a lot of girls like ****e

Took condoms from my parents room to have sex with a girl

Messed it up with a girl I liked due to being hammered

Princess Peach

Squarewave wrote: »

The Chinese seem to bear the brunt of drunk Irish people

That has reminded me of the time I was dressed as a Japanese school girl, went to the Chinese afterwards and very loudly ordered flied lice.

Went to Hillbillies chicken dresses as Big Bird once and got into a row with a guy who accused me of cannibalism.

In a pizza place once and loudly talked about how awful diamond earrings are on guys, sitting next to a table full of diamond earring scumbags.

I shouldn't be allowed out of the house.

Feisar

Princess Peach wrote: »

That has reminded me of the time I was dressed as a Japanese school girl, went to the Chinese afterwards and very loudly ordered flied lice.

Went to Hillbillies chicken dresses as Big Bird once and got into a row with a guy who accused me of cannibalism.

In a pizza place once and loudly talked about how awful diamond earrings are on guys, sitting next to a table full of diamond earring scumbags.

I shouldn't be allowed out of the house.

Funk it, I'd say yer some craic on a session!

Funglegunk

Squarewave wrote: »

The Chinese seem to bear the brunt of drunk Irish people

Ah they do it with good cheer though. The only reason I even know about the wrong floor thingy is because the guy was cheerfully slagging me about it the next time I saw him in the elevator.

tripe man wrote: »

Care to elaborate on how it's incorrect so I can disprove you..

'Disprove' me by telling me about all the times women have rejected your advances? Nah I'm grand thanks.

fuerte1976

The Snipe wrote: »

My ex.....

I get it

To start with ...
We were drinkin yards of ale at a house party, dat got boring so one gimp suggested we make our own 'yard' using a funnel & the hose off the hoover. Mouthfuls of pubic hair & spiders don't taste good- even when skuttered

Professey Chin

Vomiting (including on a new carpet)
Going wandering & getting lost
Usual sh!te talk and things that saying things that I shouldnt have

Tbh not much really. I do worse things when sober

Sútalún

candy-gal1 wrote: »

decided im going to give el bf at the time a ring, i did, but to this day ive no idea whatesoever what i said exactly , apparrantly was all nice though so all good :pac:

Wow, I though I was crazy! :pac:

begrandshur

Vomiting.
Pissing off balconies and all over someones kitchen when i couldnt get into there bathroom.(disgusting i know)
Saying completely innapropriate things.
Threating to stab people with a 8mm knife??
Eating almost anything i find.

wolfyboy555

Blagged my way into a hotel at 3 in the morning....went to the very top floor and somehow got some toilet paper....then all the way back outside and wrapped a merc completely in the toilet paper!:D

greenbicycle

I think the most impressive thing I have seen committed by a drunk person was when I was on my J1 in America. We had a bit of a house party, lots of booze and the police showed up, the party of people exited the house quickly from every exit possible to not get in trouble. One guy was very drunk and manically ran down the road screaming, slapping the police car on his way. He ended up hiding in a bush and not getting caught but it was in the local paper the next day that police wanted him on several charges

Evading arrest
Disturbing the peace
Noise pollution
Attempted damage to police property (the car slap)
Animal cruelty (there was a dog in the slapped car)
Intoxication
Littering (he puked while running)

Fairly sure there were eight things but can't remeber the last one!

The guy ended up leaving the state for the rest of his j1 bringing his identical twin brother with him

Dramatic police in America eh?

Nice newspaper clipping for your man to have as a souvenir though!