Not converting-does this make your marriage Haram?

iCosmopolis

Not changing religion-does this make your marriage Haram in the eyes of Islam? I wouldn't have thought so,but It's been raised for us recently,where it wasn't an issue before-so I was looking for an outside or broader opinion. I have been married 4 years, via civil ceremony and we have a new baby. My husband is a non practising muslim, me a non practising catholic (I would go so far as to say I'm atheist in my beliefs)
His family are absolutely fine with us the way we are,with no interference, except for one of his brothers who lives here also and has become more enthusiastic about his own beliefs over the last year (various circumstances I wont go into too much detail with but he has a new irish partner who has converted). He has been giving us surprise visits/calls with imams in tow to basically bring his concerns to us. Now I won't go into all of the things brought up, but one of the guys on his last visit basically said if I didn't intend to convert, that our marriage would be Haram. Is this considered true or does it just happen to be this particular imams opinion?

hivizman

I must begin by stressing that I'm not a Muslim and definitely not what Muslims would consider a "scholar", and given the circumstances you have outlined, you really need to get an authoritative opinion from someone who is qualified in fiqh (Islamic jurisprudence).

My understanding is that a Muslim man is permitted to marry a non-Muslim woman, so long as she is from the ahl al-Kitab (people of the Book) - this includes Christians. Although you state that you are not a practising Catholic, presumably you were baptised as a child, and you have not embraced some other religion, so you would still, I believe, count as a Christian for the purposes of marriage.

It may be desirable, particularly where children are involved, for all in the family to share their religion, but I am not aware of any requirement for a non-Muslim wife of a Muslim husband to become a Muslim for the marriage to be or to remain valid.

However, there is an overarching issue - is your marriage regarded as valid from an Islamic point of view? You mention that you married in a civil ceremony, which implies that you have not had a nikah (Muslim form of marriage). There are different views about the implications of this. One view is that, in the sight of Islam, you are not actually regarded as husband and wife. Hence you are regarded as adulterers, committing the haram act of zina (fornication). The less extreme view would be based on the fact that sharia law regards a marriage recognised by the state between two non-Muslims as valid. If your husband is regarded as having taken himself outside Islam before your marriage (you mention that he is "non-practising", which presumably means that he does not pray, and many commentators regard this as enough to take someone outside Islam), then this would mean that your marriage is considered valid. (Another possibility is that both the witnesses to the civil ceremony were Muslims, in which case it may be that the necessary formalities of the nikah were achieved through the civil ceremony.)

If both of you subsequently embrace Islam, then the existing civil marriage is regarded as remaining valid, and there is no need to go through a nikah. On the other hand, if one of you embraces Islam and the other doesn't, the marriage is regarded as being annulled, and it will not be permissible for you to live together as husband and wife.

From the above, you can see how complicated things are, which is why I recommend again that you find an impartial person who can advise you accurately.

iCosmopolis

Thanks for the information you provided. In that case can my query be locked/removed?