The Race Smack Talk thread - enter if you dare!

shotgunmcos

So, over to you folks...

Who is targetting whom? Who has the bullseye on their back for Roth, Athy, Joey....?


Who's got game y'all?


Ding Ding Ding

BTH

Lots of targets round these parts. Joey looks like the first showdown alright (I've started writing up my list of excuses already), but the real action appears to be in Athy and then Caroline Kearney later in the summer.

Oh, and Fazz, you never did tell me your predicted splits for Joey.......

hf4z6sqo7vjngi

All i know is come the 8th July in Roth Tunney and MrTango are in for a beating of epic proportions. They may want to give up the sport when i am finished with them.
Its good that the run is an out and back as it will be more fun when i point and laugh at them as they waddle with the sh1ts from stomach cramps:)

#awaits backlash

tunney

Galilea Massive Headphones wrote: »

All i know is come the 8th July in Roth Tunney and MrTango are in for a beating of epic proportions. They may want to give up the sport when i am finished with them.
Its good that the run is an out and back as it will be more fun when i point and laugh at them as they waddle with the sh1ts from stomach cramps:)

#awaits backlash

HAHAHAHA. Bar the fact that your claimed 20 minute run advantage is negated by your ability to do an amazing impression of a brick while swimming and your kiddies sized bike is just too small to go fast - sure why not.

sconhome

Whats the age group splits here?

I'd love to be able to keep up with all you younger ones. So who's in 40-44 with me?

hf4z6sqo7vjngi

tunney wrote: »

HAHAHAHA. Bar the fact that your claimed 20 minute run advantage is negated by your ability to do an amazing impression of a brick while swimming and your kiddies sized bike is just too small to go fast - sure why not.

Weak response Tunney, expected more from you. Try harder:)

mloc123

Based on Mr Tango's first 30min @ IM pace at the weekend, both of you might want to start thinking about catching him on the run

RacoonQueen

amphkingwest wrote: »

Whats the age group splits here?

I'd love to be able to keep up with all you younger ones. So who's in 40-44 with me?

THIS forum might be more suitable for you.

tunney

mloc123 wrote: »

Based on Mr Tango's first 30min @ IM pace at the weekend, both of you might want to start thinking about catching him on the run

Oh if only an IM bike was 30 minutes long

tunney

Galilea Massive Headphones wrote: »

Weak response Tunney, expected more from you. Try harder:)

Your wife think that response up?

mloc123

tunney wrote: »

Oh if only an IM bike was 30 minutes long

Notice how I only mentioned the first rep too

sconhome

RacoonQueen wrote: »

THIS forum might be more suitable for you.

OUCH!!

couerdelion

amphkingwest wrote: »

OUCH!!

I thought that too. Luckily I aren't in 40-44 AG for ages! (next year )

Fazz

BetterThanHoyte wrote: »

Lots of targets round these parts. Joey looks like the first showdown alright (I've started writing up my list of excuses already), but the real action appears to be in Athy and then Caroline Kearney later in the summer.

Oh, and Fazz, you never did tell me your predicted splits for Joey.......

Not one for time predictions really, too dependant on weather so not much point imo. And also whether someone is training through or has it as an A or B race etc.
A race is a race though and it's hard as she goes.

So I'll be scanning over your splits from Burnfoot and comparing to Paul Carroll and Co to see if any clues distances dont compare at all though.
If you see Alex Donald in it, chase him down for me and Bambaata!!!

Back to Joey, it's only a C race but I'll bring my A game

Heading down the Sat for a bike and swim with a Clubmate if you're about too?

shotgunmcos wrote: »

Quit the junk mileage this year

Goal 1 at Joey - beat BTH
Goal 2 at Joey - beat Shotguns 2011 Bike split of 1:01:14...

Whoops wrong thread

hf4z6sqo7vjngi

tunney wrote: »

Your wife think that response up?

No one of the kids did.

bryangiggsy

I cant wait to hand JB his a** to him on a plate in Caroline Kearney.......he's all talk ..im all action

PS Fearing this he informed me he just pulled out of tri athy sprint.......

tunney

Careful now, there could be potholes in CK.

tunney

I got this lovely warm glow around my shoulders and chest. That nice ache that you get from a tough long swim set. The kind of swim set that would make Little Jacky Back cry into his cornflakes and head back to bed.

hf4z6sqo7vjngi

bryangiggsy wrote: »

I cant wait to hand JB his a** to him on a plate in Caroline Kearney.......he's all talk ..im all action

PS Fearing this he informed me he just pulled out of tri athy sprint.......

Not you as well, are you sure your carbon fibre hip replacement will hold up for some race intensity. I have heard you have been working out, benching 3 celery sticks.....weak:)

Transfered from sprint to double OLY as going to use the day as a training day. The 3k swim should be a good measure to see if i will need flotation devices in the Roth canal.

hf4z6sqo7vjngi

tunney wrote: »

I got this lovely warm glow around my shoulders and chest. That nice ache that you get from a tough long swim set. The kind of swim set that would make Little Jacky Back cry into his cornflakes and head back to bed.

How many lenghts of your bath tub did you do?

tunney

Galilea Massive Headphones wrote: »

Not you as well, are you sure your carbon fibre hip replacement will hold up for some race intensity. I have heard you have been working out, benching 3 celery sticks.....weak:)

Transfered from sprint to double OLY as going to use the day as a training day. The 3k swim should be a good measure to see if i will need flotation devices in the Roth canal.

Can you swim 3k?

sconhome

Galilea Massive Headphones wrote: »

I have heard you have been working out, benching 3 celery sticks.....weak:)

Galilea Massive Headphones wrote: »

How many lenghts of your bath tub did you do?

tunney wrote: »

Can you swim 3k?

Are ye in the 12-16 age group?

tunney

amphkingwest wrote: »

Are ye in the 12-16 age group?

JB is just special, there is a group of us going collection on April 27th to support him in his training and racing.

interested

Galilea Massive Headphones wrote: »

The 3k swim should be a good measure to see if i will need flotation devices in the Roth canal.

Im sorely tempted to participate in this little swim and hover beside you to help you 'acclimatise' for the physicality in Roth. It is just a 'training' day for you after all.

hf4z6sqo7vjngi

tunney wrote: »

Can you swim 3k?

I swam aqua jogged my way around 3.9km in a lake last year;)

amphkingwest wrote: »

Are ye in the 12-16 age group?

It would seem that way, its like being bullied back in school all over again:)

tunney wrote: »

JB is just special, there is a group of us going collection on April 27th to support him in his training and racing.

Likewise we have a collection on the following week for Tummy for liposuction. He is doing fvk all training so its the only chance he will get down to race weight. All donations welcome.

interested wrote: »

Im sorely tempted to participate in this little swim and hover beside you to help you 'acclimatise' for the physicality in Roth. It is just a 'training' day for you after all.

My own personal swim pacer, that would be cool.

Time to throw down the gauntlet to Mr Tummey and see if he is a man or mouse:) Last person across the finish line in Roth wears one of these around the DCT bike and run:)

Bambaata

tunney wrote: »

I got this lovely warm glow around my shoulders and chest. That nice ache that you get from a tough long swim set. The kind of swim set that would make Little Jacky Back cry into his cornflakes and head back to bed.

how much B+B was that this morning? You seemed to have the band permanently attached.

tunney

Bambaata wrote: »

how much B+B was that this morning? You seemed to have the band permanently attached.

Main part of set was 3x(400,300,200,100) as sw/B+B/P
Total set guts of four and a half k

hf4z6sqo7vjngi

This is how the race will pan out:)

Tunney out of the water 10mins ahead of me but this is cut down to 8mins as he gorges down a bag of haribo jellies and a quick glass of sauv blanc in T1.

Tunney puts time into me early on the bike as he gets carried away and thinks 250w for him is sustainable. He quickly comes to the conclusion its not and the bike also starts to seize up due to no usage since Frankfurt last year. We roll into T2 close enough but I come out of T2 quicker again as Tunney stops for a nap and another bag of haribo jellies.

Tunney goes out too fast on the run and opens up a 10min lead. I close the gap and overtake him around 25/30km as he struggles with drinking from cups and spilling water all over himself. This coupled with severe stomach cramps and him stopping for a sh1t every few minutes from a haribo jelly overload.

I pass whilst laughing at him and singing the theme tune of Dora the Explorer and making Peppa Pig grunt noises and pointing out his kids will be so ashamed of him as he starts to cry.

I cross the finish line first and he follows in later with some excuse that it was warm, he was dehydrated or the moon and stars were not aligned. He goes to the media tent and announces he is retiring from the sport as he just got beat by a guy swimming with armbands on and cycling on a kids bike:)

Should be a good reflection on the day:pac:

sconhome

I think you guys should get your own show on TV, would be much more entertaining.

tunney

Galilea Massive Headphones wrote: »

This is how the race will pan out:)

Tunney out of the water 10mins ahead of me but this is cut down to 8mins as he gorges down a bag of haribo jellies and a quick glass of sauv blanc in T1.

Tunney puts time into me early on the bike as he gets carried away and thinks 250w for him is sustainable. He quickly comes to the conclusion its not and the bike also starts to seize up due to no usage since Frankfurt last year. We roll into T2 close enough but I come out of T2 quicker again as Tunney stops for a nap and another bag of haribo jellies.

Tunney goes out too fast on the run and opens up a 10min lead. I close the gap and overtake him around 25/30km as he struggles with drinking from cups and spilling water all over himself. This coupled with severe stomach cramps and him stopping for a sh1t every few minutes from a haribo jelly overload.

I pass whilst laughing at him and singing the theme tune of Dora the Explorer and making Peppa Pig grunt noises and pointing out his kids will be so ashamed of him as he starts to cry.

I cross the finish line first and he follows in later with some excuse that it was warm, he was dehydrated or the moon and stars were not aligned. He goes to the media tent and announces he is retiring from the sport as he just got beat by a guy swimming with armbands on and cycling on a kids bike:)

Should be a good reflection on the day:pac:

Let me get this straight?

Sun. Heat. A nice white wine, probably two bottles, and lots of haribo?
Sounds like Roth is going to be fvcking epic!

bryangiggsy

Galilea Massive Headphones wrote: »

bryangiggsy wrote: »

I cant wait to hand JB his a** to him on a plate in Caroline Kearney.......he's all talk ..im all action

PS Fearing this he informed me he just pulled out of tri athy sprint.......

Not you as well, are you sure your carbon fibre hip replacement will hold up for some race intensity. I have heard you have been working out, benching 3 celery sticks.....weak:)

Transfered from sprint to double OLY as going to use the day as a training day. The 3k swim should be a good measure to see if i will need flotation devices in the Roth canal.

am up to 5 celery sticks now

Jb dredging services an irish owned and run company will be working in the river barrow. ..the roth canal and lough enell during the mths of june july and august. Book early to avoid disappontment.