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Did you get very homesick?

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  • 20-04-2012 3:21pm
    #1
    happyclapper
    Registered Users Posts: 59 ✭✭


    We are hoping to move in the summer. In a way cant wait to start a new life, a new job and hopefully things will work out.

    I am very close to my family though and the thought of leaving them is the only thing that gets me down.

    For anyone who is living abroad how did you cope with home sickness? is it all about being busy?


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    #2
    Jim2007
    Moderators, Business & Finance Moderators Posts: 10,288 Mod ✭✭✭✭Jim2007


    happyclapper wrote: »
    For anyone who is living abroad how did you cope with home sickness? is it all about being busy?

    I think it's about integration - understanding the new culture, learning the language, establishing a support base of native friends and activities outside the ex-pat scene, getting involved in your local community etc... I firmly believe that if you spend a lot of your time hanging out with the ex-pat community you will never settle in properly.

    After 23 years here (Switzerland), I count maybe a handful of non Swiss among my friends, I'm involved in various local activities and even got a place at the Stammtisch in my local restaurant! And Ireland, well it is nice to visit, but it is not home!


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    #3
    happyclapper
    Registered Users Posts: 59 ✭✭happyclapper


    Thanks Jim. I said the same to my hubby that we must make a big effort to integrate into the surroundings and make friends with the american people rather than always being down in the irish places. Its nice to do that too I imagine but I want to experience more than just being in an irish bar all the time!

    I suppose it will take time and hopefully my family will visit often!


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    #4
    Jelly2
    Registered Users Posts: 402 ✭✭Jelly2


    I lived abroad for a long time, and I hated the loneliness, and the longing to see my family. I never got used to it. I was very well integrated - lots of friends from the area (no Irish friends at all actually), hobbies, busy at work etc. But the pain was sometimes so intense that it was physical - and it seemed to get worse, not better as time went by. I could never stick with relationships either, because I kept thinking that if I committed to someone, there would be no going back.
    In the end, I thought 'Sod it, I'll be disappointed if I'm still here in ten years', and I came back to Ireland. And never regretted it for a moment! Having said that, I think that I was an extreme case - but you did ask! You may well be different to me, and I hope so. I wish you the best of luck in your new start.:)


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    #5
    CamperMan
    Registered Users Posts: 1,835 ✭✭✭CamperMan


    Jelly2 wrote: »
    I lived abroad for a long time, and I hated the loneliness, and the longing to see my family. I never got used to it. I was very well integrated - lots of friends from the area (no Irish friends at all actually), hobbies, busy at work etc. But the pain was sometimes so intense that it was physical - and it seemed to get worse, not better as time went by. I could never stick with relationships either, because I kept thinking that if I committed to someone, there would be no going back.
    In the end, I thought 'Sod it, I'll be disappointed if I'm still here in ten years', and I came back to Ireland. And never regretted it for a moment! Having said that, I think that I was an extreme case - but you did ask! You may well be different to me, and I hope so. I wish you the best of luck in your new start.:)

    where did you live abroad?. how long for?, when did you move back to Ireland?


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    #6
    Jelly2
    Registered Users Posts: 402 ✭✭Jelly2


    CamperMan wrote: »
    where did you live abroad?. how long for?, when did you move back to Ireland?

    Well, I lived in England and France over the space of ten years, England for the longest time, and moved back to Ireland a good while ago now.
    For the OP, I think that having your husband with you should make a massive difference, because he will be the most important member of your family to you.


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    #7
    jester77
    Registered Users Posts: 11,264 ✭✭✭✭jester77


    I'm over 10 years abroad and find it ok. Don't get homesick, if anything I am happy when I leave after visiting. I bought my parents an ipad a while back and we keep in touch over video chat. I am probably more in contact now with them than when I was living in Ireland. Life is not that much different than when I was living in Ireland, I go to work, play sports, party, etc. Just don't get caught up in the whole having to hang out with Irish people thing that a lot of people seem to do, as these people never stay around for long.


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    #8
    CamperMan
    Registered Users Posts: 1,835 ✭✭✭CamperMan


    Jelly2 wrote: »
    Well, I lived in England and France over the space of ten years, England for the longest time, and moved back to Ireland a good while ago now.
    For the OP, I think that having your husband will you should make a massive difference, because he will be the most important member of your family to you.

    Ireland is much better than the UK... :D


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    #9
    CamperMan
    Registered Users Posts: 1,835 ✭✭✭CamperMan


    jester77 wrote: »
    I'm over 10 years abroad and find it ok. Don't get homesick, if anything I am happy when I leave after visiting. I bought my parents an ipad a while back and we keep in touch over video chat. I am probably more in contact now with them than when I was living in Ireland. Life is not that much different than when I was living in Ireland, I go to work, play sports, party, etc. Just don't get caught up in the whole having to hang out with Irish people thing that a lot of people seem to do, as these people never stay around for long.

    10 years in Germany?


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    #10
    jester77
    Registered Users Posts: 11,264 ✭✭✭✭jester77


    CamperMan wrote: »
    10 years in Germany?

    About that, I originally was only here to work on a project for 6 months which kept getting extended. Spent nearly a year living in a hotel, so I eventually made the move permanent and changed jobs and moved full time to Germany. No regrets, I really like it here, Hamburg is a great city and I like the work I do so I guess that makes it easy.


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    #11
    CamperMan
    Registered Users Posts: 1,835 ✭✭✭CamperMan


    jester77 wrote: »
    About that, I originally was only here to work on a project for 6 months which kept getting extended. Spent nearly a year living in a hotel, so I eventually made the move permanent and changed jobs and moved full time to Germany. No regrets, I really like it here, Hamburg is a great city and I like the work I do so I guess that makes it easy.

    we bought an old house in Germany, in the East.. our plan was to come here for a couple of months, work on the old house, then go back to Ireland.... that was 14 months ago and were still here in East Germany..


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