Toilet roll

Nothingbetter2d

JayzuzHowiye wrote: »

Some people really use way too much toilet roll in my house...Fúcking sick of buying it.:mad:

if your in a shared house just keep your bog roll in your room.... let them buy their own.

or if your really cruel buy the cheapest quality pink toilet roll u can find + the hottest chillies you can buy.... chop the chillies into small pieces on a plastic or wooden chopping board then place pieces in a bowl or bin them, carefully unroll a length of bog roll and lightly dab the board but not so hard as to have big stain on the toilet roll.... roll back up and hide in your room for a day to let it dry slightly. the next day place the bog roll on the holder. then enjoy watching your stingy house mates squirm when they get a classic dose of ring sting after they use the toilet.

Kolido

JayzuzHowiye wrote: »

Yes , 2 people, everything split down the middle. But excessive amounts used is ridiculous. A roll doesn't last more than a day! I take a dump twice to three times daily and a roll could last up to a week!

I don't know what the average is but that sounds excessive to me. Sounds like your the culprit or maybe your just full of sh1t

kfallon

Kolido wrote: »

I don't know what the average is but that sounds excessive to me. Sounds like your the culprit or maybe your just full of sh1t

A day is not a day unless you have at least two dumps my friend!

I couldn't dream of going to play football of an evening without first pebbledashing the jax, it's part of my pre-match warm up, gotta stretch the sphincter as well as the groin, hamstrings etc :pac:

stupidusername

Kolido wrote: »

I don't know what the average is but that sounds excessive to me. Sounds like your the culprit or maybe your just full of sh1t

The average varies between 3 times a day and 3 times a week. It's different for everyone. the only reason you should worry about your regularity is if it's outside of these, or it changes.

/poo facts

kfallon

stupidusername wrote: »

The average varies between 3 times a day and 3 times a week. It's different for everyone. the only reason you should worry about your regularity is if it's outside of these, or it changes.

/poo facts

Taco chips can really skew your average :pac:

stupidusername

kfallon wrote: »

Taco chips can really skew your average :pac:

And horror films

kfallon

stupidusername wrote: »

And horror films

Taco chips are worse for it, if you are going to eat them make sure you have a loo roll chllin' in the fridge :eek:

stupidusername

kfallon wrote: »

Taco chips are worse for it, if you are going to eat them make sure you have a loo roll chllin' in the fridge :eek:

What a fantastic idea.

oh and the horror films was meant to be the opposite effect.

IM0

senorwipesalot wrote: »

Ever had a finger pop through?
Front to back or back to front?
Do you look at the fruit of your bum on the paper or throw it straight in to the jacks without inspection?
Sniff much?

So many questions so little time.

username & post combination win..

kfallon

stupidusername wrote: »

What a fantastic idea.

oh and the horror films was meant to be the opposite effect.

I can also recommend babywipes and savlon cream

stupidusername

kfallon wrote: »

I can also recommend babywipes and savlon cream

This thread is turning into a gold mine of valuable information.

deman

Blast'em with....... ah forget it....

kfallon

stupidusername wrote: »

This thread is turning into a gold mine of valuable information.

Just be grateful you didn't have to do any of the 'testing'

Kwiecien

If in the loo there is no paper
behind the door you'll find a scraper
if the scraper can't be found
drag yer arse along the ground :pac:

regards,

Kwiecien

kfallon

Kwiecien wrote: »

If in the loo there's no paper
behind the door you'll find a scraper
if the scraper can't be found
drag yer arse along the ground
Either way it's a terrible caper!
:pac:

Sorry but I read your original poem in the style of a Limerick and was disappointed when there was no finishing line so I've added one!

LaVail

I'd gladly use your tea towel if it would save you a bob or two on toilet paper OP.

newmug

Pherekydes wrote: »

Save on loo roll: use the "3 shells" system.

Hmmm...., what sort of technological development is this? Could you explain this newfangled advanced system?

Lawrence1895

LaVail wrote: »

I'd gladly use your tea towel if it would save you a bob or two on toilet paper OP.

Shower curtains do the trick as well :pac:

flanders1979

Lars1916 wrote: »

Shower curtains do the trick as well :pac:

or just hop into the shower after taking a dump to wash away those itchy tomato seeds

elfy4eva

Pherekydes wrote: »

Save on loo roll: use the "3 shells" system.