Ideal Bedtime routine.

Deus Ex Machina

I raised this issue in a thread yesterday in a satirical manner, but after considerable thought I now realise that it is undeniably worthy of further discussion. So here it is:

i. Run a hot bath, complete with scented bubble bath, and light some candles.

ii. Pour a snifter of Courvoisier and slip beneath the bubbles, taking in the scent as the cognac breathes.

iii. Sip the cognac and slip deeper into the warmth so that the water is up to your shoulders.

iv. Once the drink is gone you can sink lower into the water and take in the scent of the bath once more.

v. Finish the bath with a cold shower and dry yourself thoroughly with a fluffy towel.

vi. Place hot water bottle at the end of your bed and allow the heat to radiate throughout.

vii. Look out bedroom window for a few minutes, watching the rain spatter against the glass and on the road outside.

viii. Slip into bed and enjoy the warmth for a moment.

ix. Select your book and lie back enjoying it as sleep slowly approaches.

x. As your eyes get heavy turn off the lights and recline fully, listening to the rain on the window.

xi. Sleep.

You're welcome.

MickySticks

Food, ****, shower and brush teeth, then bed.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

Deus Ex Machina wrote: »

I raised this issue in a thread yesterday in a satirical manner, but after considerable thought I now realise that it is undeniably worthy of further discussion. So here it is:

1 - Get really really really pissed.

2 - Sleep.

TeddyTedson

1. Sex
2. Turn over
3. Sleep

MungBean

i. Run a hot bath, complete with scented bubble bath, and light some candles.

ii. Pour a snifter of Courvoisier and slip beneath the bubbles....

Sleep well sweet prince.

Cpt. Kelloggs

Lie down, close eyes...

kfallon

Deus Ex Machina wrote: »

I raised this issue in a thread yesterday in a satirical manner, but after considerable thought I now realise that it is undeniably worthy of further discussion. So here it is:

What happened all your sex dolls you were on about here?

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=78458193&postcount=8

and here

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=78459028&postcount=20

Are they not part of the bedtime routine? :pac:

Deus Ex Machina

Cpt. Kelloggs wrote: »

Lie down, close eyes...

That seems more like a form of non-violent protest than a bedtime routine. You don't even imbibe any alcohol. You'd want to buff up your ideas son.

Deus Ex Machina

kfallon wrote: »

What happened all your sex dolls you were on about here?

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=78458193&postcount=8

and here

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=78459028&postcount=20

Are they not part of the bedtime routine? :pac:

No, because you have to clean them if you use them at night or the next morning they smell like what I imagine the nest of hibernating eggs smelled like at the start of Alien. It is a laborious task best conducted in daylight.

IM0

deux en machina wrote:

i. Run a hot bath, complete with scented bubble bath, and light some candles.

ii. Pour a snifter of Courvoisier and slip beneath the bubbles, taking in the scent as the cognac breathes.

iii. Sip the cognac and slip deeper into the warmth so that the water is up to your shoulders.

iv. Once the drink is gone you can sink lower into the water and take in the scent of the bath once more.

v. Finish the bath with a cold shower and dry yourself thoroughly with a fluffy towel.

vi. Place hot water bottle at the end of your bed and allow the heat to radiate throughout.

vii. Look out bedroom window for a few minutes, watching the rain spatter against the glass and on the road outside.

viii. Slip into bed and enjoy the warmth for a moment.

ix. Select your book and lie back enjoying it as sleep slowly approaches.

x. As your eyes get heavy turn off the lights and recline fully, listening to the rain on the window.

xi. Sleep.

You're welcome.

MickySticks wrote: »

Food, ****, shower and brush teeth, then bed.

lets play guess which sex each one of us is :pac:

marty1985

Take Stilnox.
Sleep.
Do all sorts of strange things.
Buy things on amazon.
Wake up.
Go to work.

TeddyTedson

marty1985 wrote: »

Take Stilnox.
Sleep.
Do all sorts of strange things.
Buy things on amazon.
Wake up.
Go to work.

Stilnoct! Soooooooo bad for you!
When I had insomnia those things made it so much worse!!!
What mg are you taking?

marty1985

TeddyTedson wrote: »

Stilnoct! Soooooooo bad for you!
When I had insomnia those things made it so much worse!!!
What mg are you taking?

I was on 10mg for one year, then 20mg for the second. But actually at the moment I still get the prescription but stopped taking them, for the past couple months I have taken none.

rednik

Strip
Give her one
turn around
fart
put up with grief
conk out
get a dig about snoring
conk out

TeddyTedson

marty1985 wrote: »

I was on 10mg for one year, then 20mg for the second. But actually at the moment I still get the prescription but stopped taking them, for the past couple months I have taken none.

I used to take a few and still not sleep. I just walked around all dopey. A lot of posting on boards all dopey....waits

IM0

TeddyTedson wrote: »

I used to take a few and still not sleep. I just walked around all dopey. A lot of posting on boards all dopey....

but..but......





obliges..

MJ23

Allied Irish, Paddy, Johnny Cash, Margaret. 4 - 5 times a week. Leave out Allied Irish and Paddy after being out for pints.

Posy

This is my own personal routine:

Clean teeth.
Get into bed.
Just look at laptop for 10 minutes at most.
I'll just have a quick look at boards.
Okay, I'll give myself until 1am on boards, then lights out.
Continue looking at boards.
Post a few things.
Read some random forums that usually wouldn't interest me.
Post some more things.

4am: Fcuuuuuuuuk
*switches off laptop*
Sleep

four18

kfallon wrote: »

What happened all your sex dolls you were on about here?

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=78458193&postcount=8

and here

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=78459028&postcount=20

Are they not part of the bedtime routine? :pac:

I hate when people bother to look up your previous posts, Its kinda shallow nitpicking and therefore they deserve to die !!

FanadMan

Normal bedtime routine......

Put on electric blanket
Wash
Clean teeth
Bed
Bit of surfing
Read
Switch off light/electric blanket
Listen to relaxing music
Stare at ceiling
Switch on light
Read
Switch off light
Stare at ceiling
Switch on light
Get up and get dressed
Make a cuppa
Watch tv
Go back to bed
Rinse/repeat till time to get up in the morning

patwicklow

Before bed i always wash up & tidy the kitchen & set the the table for breakfast
and squeeze some oranges in to a jug a place it in the freeze so when i come in from my early morning jog i have my orange juice and then prepare breakfast hoping the hens have laid.

Gummy Panda

Rub belly and drift off to sleep

Dravokivich

Stare at the ceiling for a few hours.
Eventually get to sleep.

Getting better at it now. Not staring at the ceiling as long that is...

Mickey Dazzler

You forgot to mention tearing the box off yourself.

Pandora2

FanadMan wrote: »

Normal bedtime routine......

Put on electric blanket
Wash
Clean teeth
Bed
Bit of surfing
Read
Switch off light/electric blanket
Listen to relaxing music
Stare at ceiling
Switch on light
Read
Switch off light
Stare at ceiling
Switch on light
Get up and get dressed
Make a cuppa
Watch tv
Go back to bed
Rinse/repeat till time to get up in the morning

I've been working that regime for years now, except when you are staring at the ceiling, I am cleaning the oven, defrosting the freezer or some such other sh1tty task......I feel about 90 and I am only mid-forties, my life has been so much longer than those who have no problems nodding off. Sometimes I just stand there and watch the OH as he does his best impression of a coffee perculator and I understand what drives some folks to desperate acts!! Funnily enough he was an insomniac for years and now sleeps like a child, I tried everything he did but no joy and, I gave up on sleepers a long time ago.....it was like living your life in a fog:eek:

Nothingbetter2d

Pandora2 wrote: »

I've been working that regime for years now, except when you are staring at the ceiling, I am cleaning the oven, defrosting the freezer or some such other sh1tty task......I feel about 90 and I am only mid-forties, my life has been so much longer than those who have no problems nodding off. Sometimes I just stand there and watch the OH as he does his best impression of a coffee perculator and I understand what drives some folks to desperate acts!! Funnily enough he was an insomniac for years and now sleeps like a child, I tried everything he did but no joy and, I gave up on sleepers a long time ago.....it was like living your life in a fog:eek:

have sex with your oh to tire ya out.

SunnyDub1

Brush teeth
Cleanse and wash face
Put on face cream
moisturize
Put on jammys
Get into bed
Look at a few things on my phone - boards,fb,twitter,daily mail
Sleep

Meh I dont like baths

Pandora2

Nothingbetter2d wrote: »

have sex with your oh to tire ya out.

That's why he is doing his best impression of a Coffee Perculator......the sleep of the satisfied!!!! Strangely, after sex I like to talk :D:D:D

saa

Get washed,
into pjs,
light some candles and incense to unwind,
put on some relaxing music,
wake up on fire.

Deus Ex Machina

bluewolf wrote: »

Meh I dont like baths

But have you ever had a bath with candles, scented bubble bath, music and a delicious drink for accompaniment? I suspect you'd be changing your tune if you tried that, sonny Jim.

Chamone MF

Hop into bed.
Read tragic stories/threads.
Wonder at the futility.
Search for meaning.
Stop on an atheism vs spirituality thread/flamewar.
Watch several youtube video's on philosophy and belief systems.
Go to sleep with a genuine sense of dread and confusion.
Wake up feeling like sht.
Go round cranky all day.

ElleEm

I get into jammies,
put the lamp on and do the hotel "turn down" service thing on my bed,
light the oil burner with lavender to get me all dozy,
brush my teeth,
go downstairs,
have a joint,
back upstairs,
get into bed,
surf Boards for a half hour on my phone,
sleep!

Brendog

Ideal bedtime routine?

Sleeping and NOT spending all night on the internet.

Nothingbetter2d

ElleEm wrote: »

I get into jammies,
put the lamp on and do the hotel "turn down" service thing on my bed,
light the oil burner with lavender to get me all dozy,
brush my teeth,
go downstairs,
have a joint,
back upstairs,
get into bed,
surf Boards for a half hour on my phone,
sleep!

you leave the oil burner on? a bit dangerous ain't it?

ElleEm

Nothingbetter2d wrote: »

you leave the oil burner on? a bit dangerous ain't it?

No, if you fill it full of water and use them as often as I do, you know how long it takes for the water to evaporate and candle to burn out. I blow it out before sleep though- it just makes the room nice and smelly.

TeddyTedson

Gummy Panda wrote: »

Rub belly and drift off to sleep

Your a Panda though. You're like me on that you often forget that we're talking to mostly humans on boards.

kfallon

four18 wrote: »

I hate when people bother to look up your previous posts, Its kinda shallow nitpicking and therefore they deserve to die !!

:rolleyes:

And I'm not going to die anytime soon, sorry to disappoint!

DEFTLEFTHAND

Brush teeth, get a couple of sleeping tablets from medicine just in case, Read book, I'm currently reading a borrowed copy George Hook's autobiography, its mildly interesting. After that I switch off the light and usually stay awake for a couple of hours listening to Newstalk repeats, If I'm really struggling to drift off I take the tablets and that has me zonked fairly quickly.

Cee-Jay-Cee

Switch off TV.
Get up off sofa.
Lock back door.
Go up stairs.
Take a píss and brush teeth.
Take off clothes.
Get into bed.
Sleep.

FergusODowd

patwicklow wrote: »

Before bed i always wash up & tidy the kitchen & set the the table for breakfast
and squeeze some oranges in to a jug a place it in the freeze so when i come in from my early morning jog i have my orange juice and then prepare breakfast hoping the hens have laid.

No labrador bringing the newspaper ? Slack.

Comer1

Switch off TV
Go to recycle wheelie bin and try to make as little noise as possible throwing in all the empty beer cans
Lock back door and check front door
Turn off lights in kids rooms (they are terrified of the dark LOL)
Brush teeth
Go to bed
Wake up two hours later to kids terrified screams (LOL)


I love my live:)

Cassidy28

Sleep

1966

patwicklow wrote: »

Before bed i always wash up & tidy the kitchen & set the the table for breakfast
and squeeze some oranges in to a jug a place it in the freeze so when i come in from my early morning jog i have my orange juice and then prepare breakfast hoping the hens have laid.

Wisteria lane anyone?

Paddy Cow

Deus Ex Machina wrote: »

v. Finish the bath with a cold shower

:eek:

Paddy Cow

1966 wrote: »

Wisteria lane anyone?

More like Stepford!

Deus Ex Machina

Paddy Cow wrote: »

:eek:

It's only cold for 15 to 20 seconds, then you're used to it and it makes your warm bed feel like a lil' piece of heaven when you slip beneath the sheets.

delad

Deus Ex Machina wrote: »

That seems more like a form of non-violent protest than a bedtime routine. You don't even imbibe any alcohol.

:eek: Wouldn't one suffer from heartburn if one were to indulge in an alcoholic beverage before bed?