Things you'd like to do as dictator

TeddyTedson

I'd ban commuters from town (yes all of them).
More Bus, Luas and Rail services.
Leave the euro currency, I wish I didn't have to but I do:(
Make every primary school taught through Irish for the first 4 years. Then in 3rd class introduce German (only an example, a choice would be offered) as a 3rd language.
Harsher justice system. Life will mean life. One conviction for armed robbery for example will carry a minimum 5 year sentence. 2nd conviction will be life.
White collar crime will carry the same punishments.
Light exercise will be compulsory every day before work.
Legalize cannabis and tax it at 42%.
Removal of the USC.
Increase corporation tax by 2%.
Introduce a new higher rat tax for people earning over 120,000 a year of 50%
Lower the lowest tax rate by 3%
Exterminate Fás.
Reformation of all public sector jobs. No more early retirement.
Return the retirement age to 65 on the day.
Leagalise prostitution.
Put the catholic church on probation.
One years national service compulsory.


There's a lot more but I guess that's enough for now.
Best save the crazy stuff for later :P

Ban those really annoying WiMax ads.

RichieC

So many people to line up and shoot, so little time.

TeddyTedson

Dónal wrote: »

Ban those really annoying WiMax ads.

A coming across the nation WiMax the new sensation ads?

Dónal

Dónal wrote: »

Ban those really annoying WiMax ads.

That Wimax lad is a feckin ride.

Pedant

I'd ban myself.

Gummy Panda

Round up junkie scum and put into an incinerator.

Can't mug people with HIV infected needles if you're ash

TeddyTedson

RichieC wrote: »

So many people to line up and shoot, so little time.

I don't think we should kill anyone.
Put into prison and make them work for the rest of there lives. The chain gang.

TeddyTedson

TeddyTedson wrote: »

A coming across the nation WiMax the new sensation ads?

When I am king you will be first against the wall.

SMASH THE UNIONS

I'd smash the unions

hairyprincess

TeddyTedson wrote: »

I'd ban commuters from town (yes all of them).
More Bus, Luas and Rail services.
Leave the euro currency, I wish I didn't have to but I do:(
Make every primary school taught through Irish for the first 4 years. Then in 3rd class introduce German (only an example, a choice would be offered) as a 3rd language.
Harsher justice system. Life will mean life. One conviction for armed robbery for example will carry a minimum 5 year sentence. 2nd conviction will be life.
White collar crime will carry the same punishments.
Light exercise will be compulsory every day before work.
Legalize cannabis and tax it at 42%.
Removal of the USC.
Increase corporation tax by 2%.
Introduce a new higher rat tax for people earning over 120,000 a year of 50%
Lower the lowest tax rate by 3%
Exterminate Fás.
Reformation of all public sector jobs. No more early retirement.
Return the retirement age to 65 on the day.
Leagalise prostitution.
Put the catholic church on probation.
One years national service compulsory.


There's a lot more but I guess that's enough for now.
Best save the crazy stuff for later :P

You've given this a lot of thought haven't you Ted :cool:

TeddyTedson

Gummy Panda wrote: »

Round up junkie scum and put into an incinerator.

Can't mug people with HIV infected needles if you're ash

They will be put on Spike Island to detox. Once officials are happy with their progress they will be returned to society.

Gbear

Dónal wrote: »

Ban those really annoying WiMax ads.

Jesus yes!

Also those ****ing Zurich yodelling ads.:mad:

And not just ban Harvey Norman adds but personally kick him into the sea and burn down all his stores.

Stop putting non-violent offenders in prison. Increase the sentences for violent offenders 4-fold.

Legalise everything that doesn't directly affect someone elses rights.

Take 1 day every year to burn effigies of me - an anti-personality cult.

celticcrash

Have Brady arrested on aiding and abetting child rapists.

Biggins

Start up an all female ass kicking Karate trained army and all their uniforms are bikini's.

TeddyTedson

hairyprincess wrote: »

You've given this a lot of thought haven't you Ted :cool:

This is juts some stuff that came to me. I have lots more ideas:D:D

golden lane

TeddyTedson wrote: »

I'd ban commuters from town (yes all of them).
More Bus, Luas and Rail services.
Leave the euro currency, I wish I didn't have to but I do:(
Make every primary school taught through Irish for the first 4 years. Then in 3rd class introduce German (only an example, a choice would be offered) as a 3rd language.
Harsher justice system. Life will mean life. One conviction for armed robbery for example will carry a minimum 5 year sentence. 2nd conviction will be life.
White collar crime will carry the same punishments.
Light exercise will be compulsory every day before work.
Legalize cannabis and tax it at 42%.
Removal of the USC.
Increase corporation tax by 2%.
Introduce a new higher rat tax for people earning over 120,000 a year of 50%
Lower the lowest tax rate by 3%
Exterminate Fás.
Reformation of all public sector jobs. No more early retirement.
Return the retirement age to 65 on the day.
Leagalise prostitution.
Put the catholic church on probation.
One years national service compulsory.


There's a lot more but I guess that's enough for now.
Best save the crazy stuff for later :P

you forgot about the invasion........chad looks an easy bet...but hurry up, the lake is disappearing...

Kolido

Ban reality tv shows

TeddyTedson

Dónal wrote: »

When I am king you will be first against the wall.

After you serve your years national service you will be mentally stronger and not have a desire to kill anyone in relation to advertising

Old Tom

I'd move all the junkies and skangers to a ghetto without ANY privileges. Yes, they could die - I don't care.
I'd also ensure that Garda Traffic Corps deal with idiot drivers, cyclist and pedestrians with appropriate manner.

The world would become a better place

RichieC

TeddyTedson wrote: »

I don't think we should kill anyone.
Put into prison and make them work for the rest of there lives. The chain gang.

You're a soft touch Teddy, you wouldn't last long as a dictator with that attitude.

grindle

Imprison and torture scumbags.
Impose abortions on anyone who planned to keep a child my tax ended up paying for.
3-4 day working weeks on rotation.
Condition everybody to like good art, make festivals a year-round event.
Legalise drugs.
Introduce suicide booths.

the keen edge

Biggins wrote: »

Start up an all female ass kicking Karate trained army and all their uniforms are bikini's.

Given the body shapes of some of the chicks I know around here it wouldn't really be any advantage teaching them ass kicking karate moves to ward of foreign invaders.

Putting them in bikinis would be a fearsome enough sight; and probably warrant an appearance in front of the UN Council for Human Rights on charges of War crimes against Humanity as it is.

Gummy Panda

RichieC wrote: »

TeddyTedson wrote: »

I don't think we should kill anyone.
Put into prison and make them work for the rest of there lives. The chain gang.

You're a soft touch Teddy, you wouldn't last long as a dictator with that attitude.

Yeah you don't become and stay dictator perpetuo without purging a few people

forfuxsake

grindle wrote: »

Imprison and torture scumbags.
Impose abortions on anyone who planned to keep a child my tax ended up paying for.
3-4 day working weeks on rotation.
Condition everybody to like good art, make festivals a year-round event.
Legalise drugs.
Introduce suicide booths.

Would the definition include those who seize absolute power through non-democratic and illegal methods

mark_jmc

"Introduce a new higher rat tax"


down with rat taxes

grindle

forfuxsake wrote: »

Would the definition include those who seize absolute power through non-democratic and illegal methods

Not for me. One rule for me, the rest for ye.
It's MY dictatorship.

Red Hand

Gaddaffi had the right idea...an elite female model bodyguard team...gurding my body all night. Oh yeah!

cocoshovel

Exterminate a certain minority....maybe
Completely get rid of the Irish language.
Kill all junkie knackers

TeddyTedson

RichieC wrote: »

You're a soft touch Teddy, you wouldn't last long as a dictator with that attitude.

Gummy Panda wrote: »

Yeah you don't become and stay dictator perpetuo without purging a few people

Well I think killing them would be like giving them the easy way out.
Also what would the gods say on Judgement day.

plein de force

send all junkies to some off-shore island along with the cast of tallafornia

TeddyTedson

Actually I might mame and torture rapists

Zaph

TeddyTedson wrote: »

I'd ban commuters from town (yes all of them).
More Bus, Luas and Rail services.

I know it might be stating the obvious here, but surely without all the commuters there wouldn't actually be a need for all those extra public transport services?

lividduck

cocoshovel wrote: »

Exterminate a certain minority....maybe

Which minority?

TeddyTedson

Zaph wrote: »

I know it might be stating the obvious here, but surely without all the commuters there wouldn't actually be a need for all those extra public transport services?

Improve I guess is the word I was looking for there.
On a side note I really love what they've done with Dublin Buses. Now if they can just get rid of people shooting up and **** on them they'd be great.
Also more routes.

TeddyTedson

lividduck wrote: »

Which minority?

/the biggest one

cursai

TeddyTedson wrote: »

I'd ban commuters from town (yes all of them).
More Bus, Luas and Rail services.
Leave the euro currency, I wish I didn't have to but I do:(
Make every primary school taught through Irish for the first 4 years. Then in 3rd class introduce German (only an example, a choice would be offered) as a 3rd language.
Harsher justice system. Life will mean life. One conviction for armed robbery for example will I vary a minimum 5 year sentence. 2nd conviction will be life.
White collar crime will carry the same punishments.
Light exercise will be compulsory every day before work.
Legalize cannabis and tax it at 42%.
Removal of the USC.
Increase corporation tax by 2%.
Introduce a new higher rat tax for people earning over 120,000 a year of 50%
Lower the lowest tax rate by 3%
Exterminate Fás.
Reformation of all public sector jobs. No more early retirement.
Return the retirement age to 65 on the day.
Leagalise prostitution.
Put the catholic church on probation.
One years national service compulsory.


There's a lot more but I guess that's enough for now.
Best save the crazy stuff for later :P

I'd leave the rats alone to be honest. Sure they already live in squalor.

Drumpot

If I was a dictator I would be ironical by forcing people to start thinking for themselves and to ask questions instead of accepting what they are told. I actually think western civilisations are slaves to their own minds by being subservient and unwilling to do anything for change.

I would start in the schools by forcing young adults to start getting involved in how their country is run. I would setup a puppet government that I would hold morally accountable when I know they are acting the f**k. It would be a legal requirement for you to vote and you would lose any social welfare entitlement if you didnt.

Politicians would be judged on performance and wastage (as would the public service). I would bring laws into legislation that would hold politicians more accountable then the average Joe to encourage the right people to go for the job.

deconduo

TeddyTedson wrote: »

I'd ban commuters from town (yes all of them).
More Bus, Luas and Rail services.
Leave the euro currency, I wish I didn't have to but I do:(
Make every primary school taught through Irish for the first 4 years. Then in 3rd class introduce German (only an example, a choice would be offered) as a 3rd language.
Harsher justice system. Life will mean life. One conviction for armed robbery for example will carry a minimum 5 year sentence. 2nd conviction will be life.
White collar crime will carry the same punishments.
Light exercise will be compulsory every day before work.
Legalize cannabis and tax it at 42%.
Removal of the USC.
Increase corporation tax by 2%.
Introduce a new higher rat tax for people earning over 120,000 a year of 50%
Lower the lowest tax rate by 3%
Exterminate Fás.
Reformation of all public sector jobs. No more early retirement.
Return the retirement age to 65 on the day.
Leagalise prostitution.
Put the catholic church on probation.
One years national service compulsory.


There's a lot more but I guess that's enough for now.
Best save the crazy stuff for later :P

Pretty much agree with most of this actually :pac:

Lefticus Loonaticus

All of you commoners, get naked and build me a monument. Bring me more wine aswell.

cursai

Dónal wrote: »

When I am king you will be first against the wall.

That's a lyric from Paranoid Android. I like you.

flyswatter

Biggins wrote: »

Start up an all female ass kicking Karate trained army and all their uniforms are bikini's.

Surprised that's all you'd change Biggins, you having all those political aspirations.

number10a

I'd make concentration camps for pineapples, with the harshest section for the pineapples that hide in Chinese food!! :mad:

cursai

I'd kill all hippies. And ban people from talking ****e. Also a compulsory opinion ban on people who have no experience on a topic. And ban hateful and backward beliefs like the RCC and Atheism.

BornToKill

Drumpot wrote: »

I would setup a puppet government.

Thought we already have one of those ... ?

grindle

cursai wrote: »

And ban hateful and backward beliefs like the RCC and Atheism.

Atheism's a disbelief, and it's "forward" and "loveful", otherwise atheists wouldn't want people to start using their brains.

pbowenroe

ban boards.ie. far too many ****

Daniel S

OP seems to have hit the nail on the head!

Zaph

number10a wrote: »

I'd make concentration camps for pineapples, with the harshest section for the pineapples that hide in Chinese food!! :mad:

I'd open a concentration camp for pineapple haters. It's not too late for you to see the error of your ways.

previous user

Forcefully sterilize drug addicts
Forcefully sterilize taxi drivers
Forcefully sterilize bus drivers
that is all.

Gbear

cursai wrote: »

And ban hateful and backward beliefs like the RCC and Atheism.

"Personally, I find atheists just as annoying as fundamentalist Christians."

-"Well, the important thing is that you found a way to feel superiour to both."