In labour and Bored!!!!!!

KeithM89_old

I give this ten minutes....

Abi

KeithM89 wrote: »

I give this ten minutes....

I wouldn't bother.. If it smells of shyte..

humberklog

KeithM89 wrote: »

I give this ten minutes....

You're preggers too:eek:.

KeithM89_old

Abi wrote: »

I wouldn't bother..

Im holding out for the boobs.

Gummy Panda

Abi wrote: »

ewwww.. You wanna see troll boobs

beggars can't be choosers :pac:

Abi

No baby pic with today's paper beside it

No boobs


C'mon Keith, give it a shiney lock!


/does hula dance

GAAman

xzanti wrote: »

She's already planning No.2

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2056637911

Hat's off to this one.. she's a BULLSHíT machine.

FYP

Six of One

Have been reading Coal's posts all day, it is distracting me nicely from the college assignment at hand!

Happened to see this pop up earlier which was what drew my attention:
http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?p=78637106

The snipped post was asking do other people have problems with negative people on their threads. Complaining she was told to GTFO and was called arrogant. Had to laugh! It refers to a 'pics or gtfo' comment, in After Hours! (I'm not sure what the arrogant one was.)

Coal, it was some entertaining posting until you took it too far! I wish I believed you and I would so, so, so love you to post a pic of the most undemanding newborn in the world so I could get back on board with this

Born to Die

Good call Abi.

Some people are really desperate for attention.

I miss the good trolls of days gone by.

iguana

If she is a troll why keep posting about it? If you have to, just say you think so and move on, because if she isn't people are being seriously hurtful to someone who is trying to share a major life event.

Born to Die

If she was genuinely in labour while posting on AH, she deserves a medal.
I have witnessed childbirth and I can tell you if I shoved a laptop under herself's nose to tell AH about it all, I would be rectangular in shape at the buttock area.

Mr.Biscuits

Born to Die wrote: »

If she was genuinely in labour while posting on AH, she deserves a medal.

Or maybe the pain of child birth is all just a conspiracy to make us men feel guilty

Born to Die

Mr.Biscuits wrote: »

Or maybe the pain of child birth is all just a conspiracy to make us men feel guilty

No it is genuine and I can tell you I would not go through it. It is horrific.


But I wonder could they lie be about to be exposed.

iguana

Born to Die wrote: »

If she was genuinely in labour while posting on AH, she deserves a medal.
I have witnessed childbirth and I can tell you if I shoved a laptop under herself's nose to tell AH about it all, I would be rectangular in shape at the buttock area.

No, you have witnessed one person's/ some people's labour. It's a very different experience for different people. Some lucky people have little problem doing other things during labour and have a very quick period of active labour that they recover from quickly. One of my aunts had a baby last year and came home later that day and threw a 0 day birthday party for her other 3 children to welcome the new baby. And posted comments and photos of the newborn and the party up on FB. She was also tandem feeding the newborn and her toddler. The OP making a few posts on boards while the newborn sleeps, some of which are about her fears as a new mother, is nothing compared to that so I don't think it's at all unrealistic.

The OP also disappeared for over an hour between saying she was about to push and announcing her son was born. Sure it might be a troll, it's the bloody internet, none of us could be who we say we are for all anyone else knows. But if the OP is genuine the way some people are reacting here is nothing short of mob bullying at a time when the OP would be feeling more vulnerable than most. Just because they didn't feel like her following their births doesn't mean that no-one can.

Abi

*Takes deep breath*

I'm goin' in... (no, not there)

Coal1978 wrote: »

3cm to 7cm in less than 40 mins, now he decides to get a wiggle on when I want a nap. It's all the laughing at these funny posts. Cheers guys

Not only not in pain, but laughing and posting away in AH..

Coal1978 wrote: »

Ok I have 15:22 and 13:27 guessed when this will be over any advances on that

Sure why not... Never o' clock?

Coal1978 wrote: »

On YouTube women are having orgasims during labour!!!! I have the sweats and cramps, it's not fair

And now asks why shes being cheated out of a mid labour orgasm while shes nearly fully dialated..

Coal1978 wrote: »

Pains coming fast and hard

Oh dear.. don't let it stop you from posting now..

Abi wrote: »

Is it your first baby? how far apart are the contractions?

Oh this must be why.. ?

Coal1978 wrote: »

I'm ready to push, this is the scary part

I'd be posting in AH too if I was trying to get a football out of the width of a golf ball.

Coal1978 wrote: »

13:05pm weighing 6 lbs 3oz, Christopher Robin was born. Lol he is a little ugly old man...... Just like his dad lol.

Dawhh..

Micky Dolenz wrote: »

Cool, maybe our fist AH baby.

Congrats.

Micky is a nice name, just saying like.

I didn't have to FYP there, I'd say thats all that happened. Someone had a jolly good fisting. If it wasn't the OP, it was most of AH.

Coal1978 wrote: »

I wanted to do something out there and crazy for the birth. I'll be saving the thread to give him when he's older, lol even the comments about my wide fanny.

Make sure he remembers Aunty Abi.

Coal1978 wrote: »

Well that should speak volumes to his what the auld cow is like

And time to give out about the inlaws. No child to feed? sleep to get?

Coal1978 wrote: »

More like a bowling ball through your pelvis

And something to give expecting mums something to look forward to.

Coal1978 wrote: »

I won't be eating anything for a while, the mental green **** this little dude did a while ago knocked me sick. Job going here, nappy manager, I could try get someone on the back to work incentive scheme.

Like yourself?

Oh and that green crap is called meconium. Never read the baby books then Coal?

I'm very surprised your surgeon husband didn't think to mention a few things to you. Daww.

Coal1978 wrote: »

When you guys post real pics of your children I'll think about doing it.

*sniff sniff*

Nuh oh.. confirmation on that previous bang of shyte off this thread..

Coal1978 wrote: »

Lol that's filth, I didn't even see that, it was taken away in a yellow bio hazard bucket with a purple lid, with "contains human body parts" plastered on the side, the neighbours must think I had a leg chopped off.

:rolleyes:

Coal1978 wrote: »

Yeah, I would have thought the same till I had one. I would spot him in a crowd anywhere.

Just like mummy troll, eh?

Coal1978 wrote: »

Do they?, I would be so pissed off if my mother was to go on a site and not use her real name etc but happy to plaster my photo on the website.

Big change of heart there, must have been the euphoria of imminent child birth that offered them earlier.

Coal1978 wrote: »

I wish, my friends and husband have sent me off to bed and Chris is just sleeping beside me, I'm just here with my iPhone bored.

And bored? not in the slightest tired after child birth? You are truly amazing coal.. really.

iguana wrote: »

The OP has numerous other posts and threads on the pregnancy, newborn and PI forums. I doubt she is a troll.

I respect your posts iguana, and I've a lot of time for you. If my memory serves you've children of your own? I ask you this though, if Im right, do you remember at the stage where you're about to push - after your 10cm that you were fine with posting on boards?

I say all of the above respectfully Iguana, I just hate trolls / liars.

'It' got about 103 (if memory serves) thanks with people wishing it well. This is why I will continue to post, because good people are looking out for a troll, but meaning well.

eviltwin wrote: »

read them....

Account just set up in time for the fun..

Coal1978 wrote: »

Iguana, that one Abi just has a problem with me because I didn't reply to her questions personally yesterday. Ignore it Hun x

Snort.


/sits back

Time for a glass of wine methinks.

ziggy23

This thread cant be serious:eek: I spent labour crying ,puking and shouting 'never ****ing again!!'

Dudess

What point does labour start - when the waters break?

ziggy23

Dudess wrote: »

What point does labour start - when the waters break?

Nah I had terrible contractions for hours but my waters had to be broken for me. It's totally different from the movies!

branbee

Dudess wrote: »

What point does labour start - when the waters break?

I was in labour for a full day before my waters had to be broken. But for most people i think that's when they go to hospital. Like they could have contractions for a while before that but won't need to go in.

Jimoslimos

What Abi said.

Another typical 'epic' thread attempt that people seem determined to be sucked into. Can new members not have some sort of restriction on starting threads until a certain number of posts/time has elapsed? Would certainly help curb this behaviour.

The OP is, I imagine, furiously trawling the web for baby images that won't appear on tineye.

Abi

Labour can begin long before the waters break, once the waters break it's advised you go to the hospital to avoid infection. If you were home-birthing your midwife would be called if she / he wasn't there already.

Also, why post this in AH rather than parenting? If I was genuine, I'd be after more serious replies and other parents.

Babybuff

Dudess wrote: »

What point does labour start - when the waters break?

no, sometimes the waters have to be broken.

I'm not sure about this thread. I was young having my one and there were no iphones around to post about it on an internet message board but I did have to be dragged in by the midwives to the birthing room because I was desperate for a smoke and was trying to sneak outside to the steps (yes I know smoking is bad) and while I didn't get gas or air and had a pretty natural childbirth, I got a shot of pethidine late in the process which meant I was a bit high and woozy after it all, but I was very chatty and up for anything at the same time. It's all a bit weird.

ziggy23

Abi wrote: »

Labour can begin long before the waters break, once the waters break it's advised you go to the hospital to avoid infection. If you were home-birthing your midwife would be called if she / he wasn't there already.

Also, why post this in AH rather than parenting? If I was genuine, I'd be after more serious replies and other parents.

Yep I was in slow labour for 5 days before I actually had the baby. It is different for everybody but I guarantee you wont find many women that were able to post online during the final stage of labour. I couldn't even text.

Dudess

A friend if mine's waters broke on our kitchen floor while the Ireland v Saudi Arabia game in Saipan was on :pac:
Visited her in hospital next day and she was in pain and like a demon but pacing up and down the corridor. She said she was, at this stage, in labour. The one next to her was apparently in labour too and was venturing out for a fag every so often :eek:

I find the whole thing confuzzling!

iguana

Abi wrote: »

I respect your posts iguana, and I've a lot of time for you. If my memory serves you've children of your own? I ask you this though, if Im right, do you remember at the stage where you're about to push - after your 10cm that you were fine with posting on boards?

I say all of the above respectfully Iguana, I just hate trolls / liars.

No I don't have kids, I'm currently pregnant with my first, all going well. I just have some close relatives who had very easy labours and were absolutely fine during and after it, some who had an utterly horrendous times and many who had normal labours which were still fairly horrendous compared to just about anything else you can do in life. I know people who would have been able to post on boards right up until the end if they'd wanted to, or boards had existed at the time and who could have done so shortly afterwards too. (I doubt I'll be one of them, twice in my life I have passed out from pooing, I have endometriosis, so I'm dreading the whole birth thing. But my experience won't be the universal one, because birth experiences can and do vary wildly.)

I can see why the OP's posts seem trollish. I already have no sense of humour about the upcoming expansion of my vagina, the I'll have the dog with me when I give birth but not my in-laws thing does sound circumspect. It does seem far-fetched but sometimes truth is stranger than fiction. The OP appears consistent in her story, granted it's only been a couple of days posts, but ime most trolls would have seriously tripped up and contradicted themselves by now.

ziggy23

Dudess wrote: »

A friend if mine's waters broke on our kitchen floor while the Ireland v Saudi Arabia game in Saipan was on :pac:
Visited her in hospital next day and she was in pain and like a demon but pacing up and down the corridor. She said she was at this stage in labour. The one next to her was apparently in labour too and was venturing out for a fag every so often :eek:

I find the whole thing confuzzling!

It is! I had it all planned out oh I won't need any pain relief etc but the reality is you could have a really quick birth or a long drawn out affair like mine. I had contractions on top of each other no break between them but was still only 1cm dilated:eek: Had to have a section in the end, whereas a friend of mine had her baby within 2 hours of her 1st contraction!

branbee

Yeah everyone is different and the different stages will last varying times too. At the start of mine i walked to the local shop and then ten minutes later i had to get a taxi home the pain was so severe. Then the docs told me it would be a quick one and i prob wouldn't need pain relief the way i was going- after about 20 hours i had been through them all and still no baby!

Dudess

Another friend of mine went in the other day, baba popped out after an hour and a half. Nothing taken other than paracetamol.

ziggy23

iguana wrote: »

No I don't have kids, I'm currently pregnant with my first, all going well. I just have some close relatives who had very easy labours and were absolutely fine during and after it, some who had an utterly horrendous times and many who had normal labours which were still fairly horrendous compared to just about anything else you can do in life. I know people who would have been able to post on boards right up until the end if they'd wanted to, or boards had existed at the time and who could have done so shortly afterwards too. (I doubt I'll be one of them, twice in my life I have passed out from pooing, I have endometriosis, so I'm dreading the whole birth thing. But my experience won't be the universal one, because birth experiences can and do vary wildly.)

I can see why the OP's posts seem trollish. I already have no sense of humour about the upcoming expansion of my vagina, the I'll have the dog with me when I give birth but not my in-laws thing does sound circumspect. It does seem far-fetched but sometimes truth is stranger than fiction. The OP appears consistent in her story, granted it's only been a couple of days posts, but ime most trolls would have seriously tripped up and contradicted themselves by now.

Aw congrats on the pregnancy:D
Don't worry about all the horror stories. Your body will deal with it no problem just take it has it comes. And any pain is worth it when you get to hold your little bundle in your arms. Best feeling ever:D:D
My only advice is just take it as it comes, try not to have too many pre-conceptions in your
head!
Oh and stay away from Raspberry Leaf Tea...I think thats what caused my erratic contractions!

harney

ziggy23 wrote: »

It's totally different from the movies!

I hope so, I'm not sure I'd be comfortable with my oh going through some of the scenes from “Sluts in labour 5”

Abi

iguana wrote: »

The OP appears consistent in her story, granted it's only been a couple of days posts, but ime most trolls would have seriously tripped up and contradicted themselves by now.

It has, several times

A lot of parents frequent AH too, and quite a few have copped the unlikelyhood of a woman posting as she is being told to push, having given birth themselves. In fact, most can't think straight once they've begun to dialate.

I'm sorry if I'm annoying you iguana, its not what I wanted at all. But once I smell bull and someone taking advantage of others good will, I'm like a dog with a bone.

I do wish you the very best with the birth of your baby

Acoshla

ziggy23 wrote: »

Aw congrats on the pregnancy:D
Don't worry about all the horror stories. Your body will deal with it no problem just take it has it comes. And any pain is worth it when you get to hold your little bundle in your arms. Best feeling ever:D:D
My only advice is just take it as it comes, try not to have too many pre-conceptions in your
head!
Oh and stay away from Raspberry Leaf Tea...I think thats what caused my erratic contractions!

So AH and Parenting forum are one and the same now yes?

ziggy23

Acoshla wrote: »

So AH and Parenting forum are one and the same now yes?

Ah stop giving out. Why did you click on a thread entitled Labour?

Acoshla

ziggy23 wrote: »

Ah stop giving out. Why did you click on a thread entitled Labour?

Because this is AH so I thought it might be funny, a joke, my mistake!

iguana

Abi wrote: »

I'm sorry if I'm annoying you iguana, its not what I wanted at all. But once I smell bull and someone taking advantage of others good will, I'm like a dog with a bone.

Nah, it's not annoying me, I just think I was the second response to her first post in PI and I don't want to have wasted my time giving advice to someone who was just getting strange kicks. So I hope the OP is real.

ziggy23 wrote:

Yep I was in slow labour for 5 days before I actually had the baby.

That happened to my friend last year, she said the worst part was that it was utterly exhausting as she couldn't sleep from the contractions and then after 5 nights of no sleep she had to do active labour. Yet she said she'd take that all over again rather than her morning sickness and afaik, she never burst the blood vessels in her eyeballs or gave herself a nose bleed from puking like I did, so maybe the worst is over me I'll not mind labour too much.

ziggy23

Acoshla wrote: »

Because this is AH so I thought it might be funny, a joke, my mistake!

It's a troll thread it seems.
Oh and every thread on AH is funny is it? The Household charge megathread is hilarious I heard.

Battered Mars Bar

Born to Die wrote: »

No it is genuine and I can tell you I would not go through it. It is horrific.


But I wonder could they lie be about to be exposed.

My mommy says the pain thing is a load of boll¡x, says she never seen a woman in agony during birth until the soaps came along.

Acoshla

ziggy23 wrote: »

It's a troll thread it seems.
Oh and every thread on AH is funny is it? The Household charge megathread is hilarious I heard.

Did I say somewhere that every thread in AH is funny? A lot of threads in AH are funny, and frankly the thought that someone would be pushing a human out of their body and would be bored isn't exactly common, so I thought it might be - yep, you've guessed it - funny! Would you like a further breakdown of what funny is or do you understand the concept?

ziggy23

Acoshla wrote: »

Did I say somewhere that every thread in AH is funny? A lot of threads in AH are funny, and frankly the thought that someone would be pushing a human out of their body and would be bored isn't exactly common, so I thought it might be - yep, you've guessed it - funny! Would you like a further breakdown of what funny is or do you understand the concept?

ok don't get your knickers in a twist over it;)

Born to Die

Battered Mars Bar wrote: »

My mommy says the pain thing is a load of boll¡x, says she never seen a woman in agony during birth until the soaps came along.

Your Mommy must have a very wide vagina or an amazing pain threshold.
Which is it?

iguana

I'm tempted to try an experiment come November. I'll start a labour thread and see how far I get and how soon I post up after delivery. But not in AH or I'll probably hunt down and dismember anyone who makes giant vagina jibes.

Abi

Jimoslimos wrote: »

What Abi said.

Another typical 'epic' thread attempt that people seem determined to be sucked into. Can new members not have some sort of restriction on starting threads until a certain number of posts/time has elapsed? Would certainly help curb this behaviour.

The OP is, I imagine, furiously trawling the web for baby images that won't appear on tineye.

In some cases they may be, others not.

Abi

iguana wrote: »

I'm tempted to try an experiment come November. I'll start a labour thread and see how far I get and how soon I post up after delivery. But not in AH or I'll probably hunt down and dismember anyone who makes giant vagina jibes.

A real one would be welcomed

iguana

Abi wrote: »

A real one would be welcomed

That's what you think. I've actually been lurking here for over 7 years to set this up. I even hired a woman to attend a few boards beers to help set the illusion. I'm actually a 72 year old American man on death row.:cool:

Born to Die

iguana wrote: »

That's what you think. I've actually been lurking here for over 7 years to set this up. I even hired a woman to attend a few boards beers to help set the illusion. I'm actually a 72 year old American man on death row.:cool:

At last some truth in the thread. What did you do?

Stark

pooed himself.

iguana

Born to Die wrote: »

At last some truth in the thread. What did you do?

I didn't do anything, it was a set up. The mayor was out to get me.:mad:

Dudess

Battered Mars Bar wrote: »

My mommy says the pain thing is a load of boll¡x, says she never seen a woman in agony during birth until the soaps came along.

"I had an easy time of it, therefore every other woman does."

Born to Die

iguana wrote: »

I didn't do anything, it was a set up. The mayor was out to get me.:mad:

That's typical of American justice, loads of innocents on death row.
Wanna be penpals? Can I come to watch when they fry you?

Battered Mars Bar

Dudess wrote: »

"I had an easy time of it, therefore every other woman does."

I guess the pain is over hyped. The media portrays it as such and women go in expecting it to hurt and it does. Mind over matter*

*does not apply to a kick in the testicles.