I discovered my bf has been downloading porn through unethical means...what to do?

omgitsthelazor

I got his IP address and checked it www.youhavedownloaded.com, just out of curiosity. Was wondering if he bootlegged any really bad music that I could playfully tease him about but wasn't happy with what I saw.

Especially since the downloaded stuff was dated and a lot of it was around December, a time of emotional significance for us (which I wont get into) that he absolutely should not have been looking for porn.

Not looking for relationship advice or anything just thoughts on the dilemma, do I let on what I know or should I not? How bad ethically is checking someones online history?

MagicMarker

Man in being man shocker...

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

you should confront him so he can dump you

man looking at porn?
shock horror

next in breaking news: sky is blue

danslevent

Ahh, this should be moved to personal issues or relationship issues...

MagicMarker

danslevent wrote: »

Ahh, this should be moved to personal issues or relationship issues...

Where's the fun in that?

Nodin

...you can download porn?

danslevent

danslevent wrote: »

Ahh, this should be moved to personal issues or relationship issues...

nah you're grand thanks

BornToKill

Was he piggybacking on a neighbour's broadband then?

MagicSean

Re-enact one of the scenes with him.

Funglegunk

omgitsthelazor wrote: »

Especially since the downloaded stuff was dated and a lot of it was around December, a time of emotional significance for us (which I wont get into) that he absolutely should not have been looking for porn.

Men look at porn all the time. Now you are a little wiser.

Thrill

Maybe it was for research purposes and such.

El Weirdo

That website is a pisstake, btw.

Your boyfriend definitely downloads porn though.

Nodin

omgitsthelazor wrote: »

...............
Especially since the downloaded stuff was dated and a lot of it was around December, a time of emotional significance for us (which I wont get into) that he absolutely should not have been looking for porn.

.........

.....he downloaded during some obscure christmas porn-ban that may well exist in your head, but probably not in his...right, with ye so far...

djk1000

IP addresses can and do change. Wasn't necessarily your bf that did it. Stop spying on him and get over it! Don't think there is an Internet connected man on the planet that hasn't looked at porn.

BornToKill

omgitsthelazor wrote: »

Especially since the downloaded stuff was dated

Some of the early 70s stuff didn't age well at all.

cruiser178

this is one of those treads where you dont have to read the op, just the posts to get a laugh

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

BornToKill wrote: »

Some of the early 70s stuff didn't age well at all.

i love how everything on after hours can be traced back to women shaving

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

Site has no reconds on me.

Can't be genuine.

Thefirestarter

omgitsthelazor wrote: »

Not looking for relationship advice or anything just thoughts on the dilemma, do I let on what I know or should I not? How bad ethically is checking someones online history?

You make it sound like you dumped toxic waste on a family of ducks, not a simple browser history search.

Nodin

Funglegunk wrote: »

Men look at porn all the time. Now you are a little wiser.

Do you want to break it to her about the **** or willl I?

bpb101

The awarded moment when the op realize that her bf is a big boards.ie user! And knows her user name










And dumps her sorry arse

Dubhlinner

is that site real. it told me:


Hi. We have no records on you.
This means you are using a private torrent tracker or, of course, you may not be a torrent user at all! It happens. Please, entertain yourself. Feel free to see what other people have downloaded. The search box is on the top. If you have any friends who use torrents, use it to scare them off. We also have a widget that you can install in your website, blog or Facebook page. Or you can just send them a link to this site. They will see a table similar to what you see below. The only difference — they will see their downloads.

there are 4 males in their 20s on this IP. Seriously doubt none of us have used torrents.

Is being private on torrents the default setting?

John Mason

lol, that site said i downloaded 2 criminal minds.

i dont know what a torrent is, never mind download one

WolfgangWeisen

Well, that site certainly pulled up a few things I downloaded

Anyway, Op, know what a bunny boiler is? 'Cause you're one of them. Cop yourself on and trust your partners until you're given a reason not to, porn does not count as that. Unless, of course, you want to be a spinster?

Seems like thinly veiled spam though.

SirDelboy18

No wonder he was looking...

BillyMitchel

Go back and look at it again and pick your favourite scene and make sure you have it perfected, then act out the whole scene with you BF and see what he says or does or if he even notices..

What sites does he use by the way??

btard

omgitsthelazor wrote: »

I got his IP address and checked it www.youhavedownloaded.com, just out of curiosity. Was wondering if he bootlegged any really bad music that I could playfully tease him about but wasn't happy with what I saw.

Especially since the downloaded stuff was dated and a lot of it was around December, a time of emotional significance for us (which I wont get into) that he absolutely should not have been looking for porn.

Not looking for relationship advice or anything just thoughts on the dilemma, do I let on what I know or should I not? How bad ethically is checking someones online history?

Maybe I'm doing it wrong, but how do you download porn "through unethical means"

Also, he's more likey to be looking at porn in a time of emotional signifigance than at any other time.

Recessionbust

Me thinks the OP is the one having the last laugh. You could be clickin on anything.

omgitsthelazor

I mean I discovered what he was doing through unethical means, I don't care how it was downloaded. The problem was it was and what it was -.-

Some of the filenames were things like "brutal dildo" and a lot of crass things involving hispanic women. Its not like it was page 3 stuff or anything, it sounded really vulgar.

Mint Sauce

Nodin wrote: »

...you can download porn?

And by unethical means as well!

:eek:

3rdDegree

OP, If I were you, I'd concentrate on reading texts on his phone and stop checking up on his internet activity. With any luck, you may even find out he's having an affair!

Teyla Emmagan

"Brutal dildo"! Classic.

Snoops often don't like what they find OP.

Wetai

Downloading porn through torrents (which the site is supposed to check, and you feel "unethical") is no different to downloading/streaming from porn sites.

omgitsthelazor

3rdDegree wrote: »

OP, If I were you, I'd concentrate on reading texts on his phone and stop checking up on his internet activity. With any luck, you may even find out he's having an affair!

Why be so mean about it?

Nodin

irish-stew wrote: »

And by unethical means as well!

:eek:

None of this in me Fathers time.




They had to go to the shops.

Defiler Of The Coffin

omgitsthelazor wrote: »

I got his IP address and checked it www.youhavedownloaded.com, just out of curiosity. Was wondering if he bootlegged any really bad music that I could playfully tease him about but wasn't happy with what I saw.

Especially since the downloaded stuff was dated and a lot of it was around December, a time of emotional significance for us (which I wont get into) that he absolutely should not have been looking for porn.

Not looking for relationship advice or anything just thoughts on the dilemma, do I let on what I know or should I not? How bad ethically is checking someones online history?

Don't believe everything you read on the internet.

omgitsthelazor

Wetai wrote: »

Downloading porn through torrents (which the site is supposed to check, and you feel "unethical") is no different to downloading/streaming from porn sites.

I missed a comma on the title, it was my snooping that was unethical not how he was downloading.

Pushtrak

The OP isn't going on about the ethics of downloading porn, but the ethics of snooping. And if she should* feel guilty about it and whether or not to confront her boyfriend.


























She should. On the guilt. Oh, and post #4 applies.

Mint Sauce

A torrent tracker? Is that anything like a tracker mortgage then?

Wetai

omgitsthelazor wrote: »

I missed a comma on the title, it was my snooping that was unethical not how he was downloading.

I only read the first time you mentioned this after I replied (I had read replies before that)

grindle

Nodin wrote: »

...you can download porn?

Porn can be not downloaded?

Dubhlinner wrote: »

is that site real.

It's real, but they only track highly-seeded, popular material.
They knew I downloaded Game of Thrones, but that's all. Terrible show

OP, needs to remember, dildo, never dildon't.

dotsman

djk1000 wrote: »

Don't think there is an Internet connected man person on the planet that hasn't looked at porn.

FYP.

Hell, even Sister Mary Margaret Ignatius gets curious from time to time.

Solair

Before you accuse anyone of anything, remember that IP addresses for most internet providers are dynamic i.e. they change and are recycled.

So, when the DSL modem or cable modem connects, it's assigned an address, that address could be someone else's DSL modem earlier on.

So, you could be looking at anyone's history really, or possibly a collection of lots of random people's history!

uncleoswald

This one is a no brainer.

What do you do?

You find out the sites he likes to frequent most, and the ones where it looks like the girls are having the most fun. You apply to take part (I imagine first you'll have do some 'auditions' first, and work your way up but if something is worth doing....) Do a few of his favourite websites to cover your bases and ensure maximum exposure.

Then just sit and wait until he discovers your new career and then when he confronts you lecture him about his double standards.

Best thing about this plan is you'll make some money in the side and meet loads of new and interesting people.

Oh and don't forget to keep us updated on your progress, preferably with links.

Best of luck.

omgitsthelazor

Theres a difference between looking at porn and downloading 2gb of "brutal dildo".

jwilco

You should download porn by ethical means and teach him a lesson.

TheGimp

Well then, I guess Brutal Dildo is one porno that you won't be re-enacting for your man.

grindle

omgitsthelazor wrote: »

Theres a difference between looking at porn and downloading 2gb of "brutal dildo".

Not if brutal dildos are what he's into. Has he got a tiny cock?

Hannibal Smith

omgitsthelazor wrote: »

I got his IP address and checked it www.youhavedownloaded.com, just out of curiosity. Was wondering if he bootlegged any really bad music that I could playfully tease him about but wasn't happy with what I saw.

Especially since the downloaded stuff was dated and a lot of it was around December, a time of emotional significance for us (which I wont get into) that he absolutely should not have been looking for porn.

Not looking for relationship advice or anything just thoughts on the dilemma, do I let on what I know or should I not? How bad ethically is checking someones online history?

No, you shouldn't confront him. It's a bit like reading some one's emails/texts, you go snooping you may find something you don't like, that's the risk you take when you go snooping . The fact that you now know, is your own doing and you shouldn't make him feel bad for it. You may not like what he's looking at the internet, but he's not going to like what you did either, and it doesn't give you any rights or permission to confront him over it.

As long as it wasn't anything illegal, forget what you saw.

omgitsthelazor

Solair wrote: »

Before you accuse anyone of anything, remember that IP addresses for most internet providers are dynamic i.e. they change and are recycled.

So, when the DSL modem or cable modem connects, it's assigned an address, that address could be someone else's DSL modem earlier on.

So, you could be looking at anyone's history really, or possibly a collection of lots of random people's history!

I thought about that, but the IP I got from him was from an e-mail in December and the date labelled on his downloads for quite a lot of them was in December.
I know he doesn't turn his modem off at night so he tends to keep the same IP until he manually restarts, I've checked a lot of his IPs and they stay the same for usually a few weeks to a month or two before they change. I checked them all in the appropriate timeframe that I know he was using them.