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Friends with a friends ex?

steddyeddy · 2012-05-20 15:14:03

Sorry for the confusing title! A friend of mine has being going out with a girl for a while and some other friends of our saw her cheating on him several times. She wants to meet him for "a chat" but she still wants to be friends with all of us. In particular she tries to talk to me a lot. When they break up should I…

20-05-2012 4:14pm

#1

steddyeddy

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Sorry for the confusing title! A friend of mine has being going out with a girl for a while and some other friends of our saw her cheating on him several times. She wants to meet him for "a chat" but she still wants to be friends with all of us. In particular she tries to talk to me a lot. When they break up should I continue to be friends with her or what?

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#2 20-05-2012 4:16pm

3ndahalfof6

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how do you know she was not cheating on someone else with him.

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#3 20-05-2012 4:16pm

RachaelVO

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Do you want to be friends with her?

If you do, well then be her friend!

If you don't, well then don't be friends with her!

If you're confused just consider where your loyalties are, with your friend or his cheating ex!

Not really that difficult!

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#4 20-05-2012 4:17pm

whistlingtitan

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steddyeddy wrote: »

Sorry for the confusing title! A friend of mine has being going out with a girl for a while and some other friends of our saw her cheating on him several times. She wants to meet him for "a chat" but she still wants to be friends with all of us. In particular she tries to talk to me a lot. When they break up should I continue to be friends with her or what?

Depends on how good of a friend you are to him????
Did you know her beforehand ?? If not. Bros before woes

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#5 20-05-2012 4:18pm

steddyeddy

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3ndahalfof6 wrote: »

how do you know she was not cheating on someone else with him.

Good point I dont!

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#6 20-05-2012 4:19pm

RachaelVO

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whistlingtitan wrote: »

Depends on how good of a friend you are to him????
Did you know her beforehand ?? If not. Bros before woes

Is that not Bros before hoes?

(although woes fits the bill too)

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#7 20-05-2012 4:19pm

steddyeddy

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RachaelVO wrote: »

Do you want to be friends with her?

If you do, well then be her friend!

If you don't, well then don't be friends with her!

If you're confused just consider where your loyalties are, with your friend or his cheating ex!

Not really that difficult!

Well I did enjoy her company but Im not fond of her as a person after the cheating thing. I think bros before hoes will win out in this case!

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#8 20-05-2012 4:20pm

flyton5

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Have you heard of the smelly finger test?

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#9 20-05-2012 4:20pm

RachaelVO

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steddyeddy wrote: »

Well I did enjoy her company but Im not fond of her as a person after the cheating thing. I think bros before hoes will win out in this case!

You've quiet possibly answered your own question!

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#10 20-05-2012 4:22pm

FatherLen

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i was in a remarkably similar situation. my mates gf at the time cheated on him and wanted to stay a part of the group. we didnt let her. i will always look out for my friends and if someone is willing to hurt one of my friends like she did then she doesn't deserve our friendship.

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#11 20-05-2012 4:26pm

Micky Dolenz

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This brings me back to when I was doing my junior cert.

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#12 20-05-2012 4:27pm

Rhyme

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Distance is a pretty good tool, use it wisely.

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#13 20-05-2012 4:41pm

Immaculate Pasta

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Bros before hoes :cool:

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#14 20-05-2012 4:45pm

johnayo

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3ndahalfof6 wrote: »

how do you know she was not cheating on someone else with him.

:D:D

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#15 20-05-2012 4:45pm

brummytom

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Two friends of mine, a lad and a girl, recently broke up after 2 years or something going out.

Without sounding callous, pick one. You can't stay friends with both without it getting messy and getting grief from both sides.

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#16 20-05-2012 4:46pm

Princess Peach

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Its up to you I think!

I've had friends who made me cut their exes out of my life because of loyalty or some bull like that. Worse was one of my friends who was cheating on her guy for ages, he was just lovely, but sure I couldn't really betray my friend. It was horrible

But then it was all fine for them to stay friends with my exes cause I never expressly forbid it ¬_¬

Rant over: I hate girls.

Its really your decision, if your friend sat you down and had an honest discussion to say he wasn't comfortable with it then I would listen. But if you want to be her friend and no harm comes of it, sure why not.

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#17 20-05-2012 4:52pm

Phoenix Park

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brummytom wrote: »

Two friends of mine, a lad and a girl, recently broke up after 2 years or something going out.

Without sounding callous, pick one. You can't stay friends with both without it getting messy and getting grief from both sides.

Indeed, perhaps a 15 minute interview with each to allow then to put their case forward would be fair.

And then pick the girl, even if there's just a 0.0001% chance of sex. Its still a chance.

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#18 20-05-2012 4:53pm

christmas2012

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do you really want to be friends or more than friends with a cheater?

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#19 20-05-2012 5:02pm

Chuck Stone

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One of my favourite posts pins down my stance.

"Bros before hos man, bros before hos." - Martin Luther King Jr.

You're not going to argue with Mr King are you, you filthy racist?

Source.

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#20 20-05-2012 6:14pm

hondasam

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steddyeddy wrote: »

Sorry for the confusing title! A friend of mine has being going out with a girl for a while and some other friends of our saw her cheating on him several times. She wants to meet him for "a chat" but she still wants to be friends with all of us. In particular she tries to talk to me a lot. When they break up should I continue to be friends with her or what?

You are waiting for them to break up so you can move in on her. Go for it.
Your friend might be pissed with you for awhile but he will get over it. Young love is so cute.

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#21 20-05-2012 6:23pm

shopaholic01

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It never works out, people expect you to take sides or they will both use you as a source of information about what the other is getting up to.

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#22 20-05-2012 6:28pm

Peetrik

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Going to jump to a massive conclusion and answer the 'real' question of...

How long should I wait to bang my friends ex?

Answer: If you care about your friend, don't bang her.

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#23 20-05-2012 7:51pm

earpiece

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OP..... do her and dump her.

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#24 20-05-2012 7:54pm

FizzleSticks

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This post has been deleted.

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#25 20-05-2012 7:59pm

AnonoBoy

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Why would you want to be friends with her when she cheated on your friend?

I'd say bros before hoes but that's a stupid, unoriginal thing to say so I won't say it.

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#26 20-05-2012 10:10pm

blackwhite

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Rhyme wrote: »

Distance is a pretty good tool, use it wisely.

You call your penis "Distance"?

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#27 20-05-2012 10:14pm

bradknowell

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FatherLen wrote: »

i was in a remarkably similar situation. my mates gf at the time cheated on him and wanted to stay a part of the group. we didnt let her. i will always look out for my friends and if someone is willing to hurt one of my friends like she did then she doesn't deserve our friendship.

Father len???
did she report ye or just stopped going to mass?

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#28 20-05-2012 10:20pm

Fiona

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Never stayed friends with any of my exes, once its over thats it, all traces of the relationship and contact are removed.

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#29 20-05-2012 11:14pm

RaRaRasputin

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Amazing how many people don't comment on the original post because they love to post about themselves, though no one cares.

I wouldn't want to friends with someone who had really screwed over a good friend of mine. Talking to someone is one thing and there is nothing wrong with listening to their point of view, especially not if their reputation was down to some others' random account of their infidelity though. Use your brains people...

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