The Online Dating Thread 3..**READ 1ST POST Oct 2012**

The Big Red Button

On the whole POF/OKC debate ... giving a girl's perspective ...

POF was scary. Non-stop messages, every minute, I had no time to even read them all, let alone begin to reply to them.

OKC - it was much nicer. Almost all messages I received were from nice genuine guys. Even if I wasn't interested, I was much more inclined to reply

Just giving my own experience ...

coco_lola

chatterpillar wrote: »

On the whole POF/OKC debate ... giving a girl's perspective ...

POF was scary. Non-stop messages, every minute, I had no time to even read them all, let alone begin to reply to them.

OKC - it was much nicer. Almost all messages I received were from nice genuine guys. Even if I wasn't interested, I was much more inclined to reply

Just giving my own experience ...

I get a lot of messages on POF too, but I don't reply to messages saying "Hey" or any of those generic one liners, unless their profile is really outstanding. Sounds harsh, but if they're not willing to put in the effort to start with, neither am I.

herisson

im on OKC and sometimes i just love the opening messages i get!

one guy said to me that he loves the way i have bottles shoved down my top and that he thought it was hilarious! Turns out he was really nice and we would have been great together only for the fact that he lives in Germany

srm23

hey guy here, met a really nice girl on online, been on 3 dates thus far but im in need of some female advice on my next move anyone willing to help please pm.

ladylost

I'm really annoyed with online dating thing tonight. Think I should take a break from it. I am chatting with a few guys who all say they want to meet but are being evasive then when it comes to plans. Guy 2 cancelled the other evening only after I text to check if we were still meeting. He's still mailing me but no more talk of meeting up. Another guy keeps saying let's meet and then saying he's really busy. Supposed to have a date Thursday but he can't seem to commit to a time. Date 2 with guy 1 friday night but again I'm not sure either he or I are interested. Sorry for rant but so annoyed with the whole thing this evening!! Am I the only one with this messing going on? I know I'm probably bringing it on myself with too many chats on the go but don't think any are really interested in me. I'm thinking I'm the back up plan. Rant over...apologies

G-Money

OKCupid is a nicer site but definitely has less traffic I've noticed. I actually deleted my profile on there the other day. I'm planning on axing my POF profile in the next day or so as well.

Snowie

Lady lost Online dating should be taking nothing more then a big fat joke....
People are flakey as hell some times...

Ive had a number of dates the past week and a bit... They've been kinda cool.. My issue the lack of interests a lot of these girls have it tends to be either going out...
I just feel theres more to life then that.. Find it pretty unattractive that, thats there biggest interest is getting drunk.. Yeah sure thats living life all right....... I don't really enjoy the pub scene i see it as a massive waste of money with nothing to show I believe theres other ways to have fun having said that I like a drink I just don't like getting messy any more...

blacklilly

Snowie wrote: »

Lady lost Online dating should be taking nothing more then a big fat joke....
People are flakey as hell some times...

Ive had a number of dates the past week and a bit... They've been kinda cool.. My issue the lack of interests a lot of these girls have it tends to be either going out...
I just feel theres more to life then that.. Find it pretty unattractive that, thats there biggest interest is getting drunk.. Yeah sure thats living life all right....... I don't really enjoy the pub scene i see it as a massive waste of money with nothing to show I believe theres other ways to have fun having said that I like a drink I just don't like getting messy any more...

Im the same. so many people seem to consider getting drunk at the week end as a past time, I don't mind having a few drinks but doesn't bother me if I go a month or more without stepping into a pub.

ladylost

Snowie wrote: »

Lady lost Online dating should be taking nothing more then a big fat joke....
People are flakey as hell some times...

Ive had a number of dates the past week and a bit... They've been kinda cool.. My issue the lack of interests a lot of these girls have it tends to be either going out...
I just feel theres more to life then that.. Find it pretty unattractive that, thats there biggest interest is getting drunk.. Yeah sure thats living life all right....... I don't really enjoy the pub scene i see it as a massive waste of money with nothing to show I believe theres other ways to have fun having said that I like a drink I just don't like getting messy any more...

Yeah I know Snowie, thanks. I need to get a bit of perspective. Sometimes it just all seems so much harder than it needs be both in online dating and offline.

I also agree with u on the drinking issue. I'm not into going out and getting thrashed every week, in fact not at all. Feel like an old maid saying that to most guys though. Guess we need to keep the faith and I need to chill out big time!!:cool:

Dolly Daydreams

ladylost wrote: »

I'm really annoyed with online dating thing tonight. Think I should take a break from it. I am chatting with a few guys who all say they want to meet but are being evasive then when it comes to plans. Guy 2 cancelled the other evening only after I text to check if we were still meeting. He's still mailing me but no more talk of meeting up. Another guy keeps saying let's meet and then saying he's really busy. Supposed to have a date Thursday but he can't seem to commit to a time. Date 2 with guy 1 friday night but again I'm not sure either he or I are interested. Sorry for rant but so annoyed with the whole thing this evening!! Am I the only one with this messing going on? I know I'm probably bringing it on myself with too many chats on the go but don't think any are really interested in me. I'm thinking I'm the back up plan. Rant over...apologies

+1..One of the guys I'm talking to now for about a month. Think I'll knock it on the head now as nothing concrete and I don't need a text messaging buddy :rolleyes:

mood

Dolly Daydreams wrote: »

+1..One of the guys I'm talking to now for about a month. Think I'll knock it on the head now as nothing concrete and I don't need a text messaging buddy :rolleyes:

That happen me a one point as well. He cancelled our 'date' then continued to email for ages. I hinted at meeting up again but had to telling him that considering he had no intention of rearranging out 'date' and actually meeting I didn't want to hear from him again. Why waste someone time like that???

Dolly Daydreams

mood wrote: »

That happen me a one point as well. He cancelled our 'date' then continued to email for ages. I hinted at meeting up again but had to telling him that considering he had no intention of rearranging out 'date' and actually meeting I didn't want to hear from him again. Why waste someone time like that???

Exactly.. The one I'm talking to said he has been on 3 dates from the site, so he's obviously open to meeting people (which he should given it's a dating website) Very frustrating..

Varied

Got talkin to one or two, doesn't seem to be goin anywhere though, only so much effort you can make I suppose.

A lot of taken ones on there too, surely if it's a dating site then its just for singles

Regardless of how hot or how great someone may be, if it looks like it'll only ever be a Facebook buddy/text friend, then I'm not interested. Those are great 'n' all, but you need the real deal to make it worth it.

andreac

Im the same, getting chatting to guys, after a few messages they just stop mailing I dont see why they bother to reply in the first place if they arent interested.

I asked another if he wanted to meet this week, he said yeah, when and where. I said when i was free and to let me know what eve suited and havent heard back since, its really annoying.

Hardonraging

Booh .. who missed me

it''s interesting to see some of the girls complaining that guys contact them 3 or 4 times, and then seem to loose interest .. dose that not say something about that they are a looking for or perhaps that they are not being 100% genuine ..

I see the very same issue with women on there, you might tick all the box's start a conversation with a witty one liner, or two liner sentence .. get about 4 or 5 messages in they disappear, never to reply again ..

Of course the worst offender is the weirdo guys, who sign up as girl's, i'm pretty sure this is to wind normal guy's up, ore perhaps to pick up a few opening line idea's .. who know ..

Christie Rainbows

ladylost wrote: »

I'm really annoyed with online dating thing tonight. Think I should take a break from it. I am chatting with a few guys who all say they want to meet but are being evasive then when it comes to plans. Guy 2 cancelled the other evening only after I text to check if we were still meeting. He's still mailing me but no more talk of meeting up. Another guy keeps saying let's meet and then saying he's really busy.

Dolly Daydreams wrote: »

+1..One of the guys I'm talking to now for about a month. Think I'll knock it on the head now as nothing concrete and I don't need a text messaging buddy :rolleyes:

Varied wrote: »

Got talkin to one or two, doesn't seem to be goin anywhere though, only so much effort you can make I suppose

andreac wrote: »

Im the same, getting chatting to guys, after a few messages they just stop mailing I dont see why they bother to reply in the first place if they arent interested.I asked another if he wanted to meet this week, he said yeah, when and where. I said when i was free and to let me know what eve suited and havent heard back since, its really annoying.

I am having the exact same experience as you guys! And know how ye feel!
I am chatting to a guy for a while now, progressed to yahoo messenger, he even gave me his number to text, so I did the following eve after he gave it to me. He txted back straight away. Txting over and back for an hour. That was Tues last week. Haven't heard nothing since, although he did have a setback with his health 2 weeks ago, so I wonder should I give him space or txt again or send a msg on messenger?

Hardonraging

coco_lola wrote: »

People that put up animals/cars on their profile...I actually have the following written on my profile:

"If your profile contains a picture of a car/motorbike, I WILL assume you are a transformer".

:pac:

Ohh i saw that yesterday i think .. though it was kinda sweet .. something different bravo

ladylost

Christie Rainbows wrote: »

I am having the exact same experience as you guys! And know how ye feel!
I am chatting to a guy for a while now, progressed to yahoo messenger, he even gave me his number to text, so I did the following eve after he gave it to me. He txted back straight away. Txting over and back for an hour. That was Tues last week. Haven't heard nothing since, although he did have a setback with his health 2 weeks ago, so I wonder should I give him space or txt again or send a msg on messenger?

If you think he's not feeling well it might be nice to send a text and ask him how he is. You'll have your answer fast enough after that. Hopefully it's the answer you want

Hardonraging

Christie Rainbows wrote: »

I am having the exact same experience as you guys! And know how ye feel!
I am chatting to a guy for a while now, progressed to yahoo messenger, he even gave me his number to text, so I did the following eve after he gave it to me. He txted back straight away. Txting over and back for an hour. That was Tues last week. Haven't heard nothing since, although he did have a setback with his health 2 weeks ago, so I wonder should I give him space or txt again or send a msg on messenger?

I'm basing this reply on what you're written ..

If you've already sent him a txt and are awaiting a reply, or if he's online and not msg's you .. it seems pretty suss, i'd keep looking ..

Christie Rainbows

Thanks guys, ladylost I took your advice and sent him a txt

he just replied and said thanks how was I... I replied and said I'll be on messenger tonight if he wants to chat... So I'll know then what the story is I guess

mood

Guys, a word of advice... put up a decent profile photo. You wouldn't believe the amount of profiles with very bad photo ie taken with a web cam / some so dark you can't see the person / some where the guy look grumpy or even aggressive / dangerous or just odd. How these guys think they look good and might attract a woman is beyond me.

I'm sure some women could do with the same advice!

Christie Rainbows

mood wrote: »

Guys, a word of advice... put up a decent profile photo. You wouldn't believe the amount of profiles with very bad photo ie taken with a web cam / some so dark you can't see the person / some where the guy look grumpy or even aggressive / dangerous or just odd. How these guys think they look good and might attract a woman is beyond me.

I'm sure some women could do with the same advice!

do you think a webcam pic is bad? It's the 1 I use!

mood

Christie Rainbows wrote: »

do you think a webcam pic is bad? It's the 1 I use!

I've never seen a good one. They are not flattering and most guys look very grumpy in a web cam photo. The same can be said for taking a photo your self with a camera at arm lenght.

Surely you could use a photo you have on Facebook?

Christie Rainbows

mood wrote: »

I've never seen a good one. They are not flattering and most guys look very grumpy in a web cam photo. The same can be said for taking a photo your self with a camera at arm lenght.

Surely you could use a photo you have on Facebook?

yeah I can see what you mean, well mine can't be too bad considering I've gotten messages! I guess it depends on the lighting and the expression

Northclare

I gave up plentyoffish went to ok Cupid but had way more flattering mail and interest on pof than ok Cupid.

Nothing more of A turn off than a moody pic.

Herrick

God's sake someone with private pics messaged me on PoF saying they know me irl, but won't say who they are.

Have to say it's kinda creepy.

Varied

Herrick wrote: »

God's sake someone with private pics messaged me on PoF saying they know me irl, but won't say who they are.

Have to say it's kinda creepy.

That's exactly why I refuse to put a pic up. Well one of the reasons...

I have it on my profile that I'll send a pic on request, dunno if that's cutting a lot of ice!

mood

Varied wrote: »

That's exactly why I refuse to put a pic up. Well one of the reasons...

I have it on my profile that I'll send a pic on request, dunno if that's cutting a lot of ice!

I wouldn't trust someone who hasn't a photo. They are probably married/in relationship or just don't have any b*lls. Not exactly someone I want to meet.

ChtuluDawn

Herrick wrote: »

God's sake someone with private pics messaged me on PoF saying they know me irl, but won't say who they are.

Have to say it's kinda creepy.

There is a setting on PoF that allows you to not receive messages from people unless they have a picture on public or they attach one to the initial mail.

Comes in handy for rubbish like that.