The Online Dating Thread 3..**READ 1ST POST Oct 2012**

riveratom

missrandomer wrote: »

Phew!! last thing i want do is come across as a stalker

On another note, whats up with someone mailing five times and ive never replied. (didnt reply because no point in starting something when he's not realy for me)

I dont get it!

I have one on the female side! She has viewed my profile several times, 2-3 winks, a message and a couple of chat messages....

Galvasean

missrandomer wrote: »

Just saw the "hide" button now....

The 'hide' button doesn't block people. It just stops them from showing up in your search results. There is a proper block button in the message (toward the bottom) and also on their profile.

missrandomer

riveratom wrote: »

I have one on the female side! She has viewed my profile several times, 2-3 winks, a message and a couple of chat messages....

Its scary when they act like your best friend, and say stuff like "hows work today hun"

ok if they look at your profile a few times but time to call it a day if someone dosent reply back after 2nd or 3rd message i think.

my favorite message of the week is " wanna online shoppin slave" what the hell is that supposed to even mean

riveratom

missrandomer wrote: »

Its scary when they act like your best friend, and say stuff like "hows work today hun"

ok if they look at your profile a few times but time to call it a day if someone dosent reply back after 2nd or 3rd message i think.

my favorite message of the week is " wanna online shoppin slave" what the hell is that supposed to even mean

I'm actually starting to develop a sense of sympathy with what you girls must have to put up with on dating sites to be fair!

marshbaboon

missrandomer wrote: »

Its scary when they act like your best friend, and say stuff like "hows work today hun"

ok if they look at your profile a few times but time to call it a day if someone dosent reply back after 2nd or 3rd message i think.

my favorite message of the week is " wanna online shoppin slave" what the hell is that supposed to even mean

I had some really, really weird Czech girl messaging me last night... starting going on about how she rode everyone around her, wanted to fall in love, but couldn't because she was such a slut.

... told her she's probably going to die alone... Don't know if she got the joke or not... Don't really care :pac:

riveratom wrote: »

I'm actually starting to develop a sense of sympathy with what you girls must have to put up with on dating sites to be fair!

Me too! Every day a girl logs in to their messages it must be a sea of penises & comments from complete weirdos ...

missrandomer

marshbaboon wrote: »

I had some really, really weird Czech girl messaging me last night... starting going on about how she rode everyone around her, wanted to fall in love, but couldn't because she was such a slut.

... told her she's probably going to die alone... Don't know if she got the joke or not... Don't really care :pac:

ouch!

Me too! Every day a girl logs in to their messages it must be a sea of penises & comments from complete weirdos ...

Yes when all we want is one message from the eman of our dreams!!!
que the theme music from titanic :D:D

tatumkelly

missrandomer wrote: »

my favorite message of the week is " wanna online shoppin slave" what the hell is that supposed to even mean

Sounds like they're going to be your slave and buy you stuff..... Please can I have him???

Larianne

Daveysil15 wrote: »

Which is better... POF or OKC? I've only recently joined OKC but haven't used it much. There doesn't seem to be as many people on it as POF. The profiles don't seem to have as many photos on it either. Which has been the most successful for you guys?

I've had more dates from POF than OkC. Didn't really like OkCupid. There is nice people on both sites I found but POF seems to attract a greater number of idiots. (this could be because the larger number of members).

njs030

Strangest conversation of the day....

Him: I'd love you to be my ana steele
Me: that's a weird thing to say.
Him: Well I don't really know who she is but it's a sex book right?

Dear god would you not read the book before referring to it!!

cantdecide

notjustsweet wrote: »

Strangest conversation of the day....

Him: I'd love you to be my ana steele
Me: that's a weird thing to say.
Him: Well I don't really know who she is but it's a sex book right?

Dear god would you not read the book before referring to it!!

Sounds like marriage material right there:rolleyes:

CastorTroy

missrandomer wrote: »

Yes when all we want is one message from the eman of our dreams!!!
que the theme music from titanic :D:D

Would you really want Celine Dion as your song?

Larianne wrote: »

I've had more dates from POF than OkC. Didn't really like OkCupid. There is nice people on both sites I found but POF seems to attract a greater number of idiots. (this could be because the larger number of members).

I know for me in the same radius for PoF and OKC, I get 185 hits for PoF while only 5 for OKC

missrandomer

CastorTroy wrote: »

Would you really want Celine Dion as your song?



I know for me in the same radius for PoF and OKC, I get 185 hits for PoF while only 5 for OKC

Hell no, but stuff like that would only happen in movies so hence the song or maby its just like my positivity of okc.... sinking

do you have same profile text on both, thats a major difference in numbers on each site

CastorTroy

missrandomer wrote: »

Hell no, but stuff like that would only happen in movies so hence the song or maby its just like my positivity of okc.... sinking

do you have same profile text on both, thats a major difference in numbers on each site

By hits, I mean search results. And yeah filtered by the same criteria. Clearly OKC isn't too popular in Donegal

Honey-ec

HellFireClub wrote: »

* Women with kids, (in fairness I don't have kids and want to meet a girl who doesn't have any kids)

I seem to be getting nothing but guys with kids lately. And they're all really young too. Did they do away with safe sex while I was off the market, or something??? So many very young, single dads out there.

Hardonraging

Honey-ec wrote: »

I seem to be getting nothing but guys with kids lately. And they're all really young too. Did they do away with safe sex while I was off the market, or something??? So many very young, single dads out there.

In fairness the figures stack up with single mum's as opposed to women who are single ... huge diff there..

njs030

Honey-ec wrote: »

I seem to be getting nothing but guys with kids lately. And they're all really young too. Did they do away with safe sex while I was off the market, or something??? So many very young, single dads out there.

Glad you said that I'd noticed it too!! Also a sudden influx of messages from young lads!! I'm mid 30's yet the majority of messages are from men 26-29. What's that all about?

HellFireClub

Honey-ec wrote: »

I seem to be getting nothing but guys with kids lately. And they're all really young too. Did they do away with safe sex while I was off the market, or something??? So many very young, single dads out there.

Am noticing that most women I'm chatting to are in their 30's and either separated or divorced. That in itself wouldn't bother me, and I could date a girl with kids, but I'd worry if a few months down the road, I'd have a problem with it, if things got serious. It's a hard situation to call because you are basically judging someone by whether they have kids or not, and it doesn't seem right.

You could run into the most amazing woman who has 2 kids and is separated and probably going to apply for a divorce in due course, and she could be separated because her husband or ex partner was just an absolute arséhole and was cheating all around her. But she gets rid of him (which is a hard thing to do), and finds herself on a dating site and because she has kids, she gets basically set aside?

I know I'd have a lot to say about that if the shoe was on the other foot. But yet I don't want to date a girl with kids because I'd worry that if things got serious down the road, that I would still want to have my own kids with a partner and I'd probably not be blessed with the patience for an ex-husband/partner/father being in the equation on a weekly basis.

HellFireClub

Pet peeve for the day on POF!!!



5'3" is not clearly not Big & Tall. This seems to be a common thing for girls that are overweight, it seems to be the norm now to describe yourself as BBW as opposed to describing yourself as "a few extra pounds", implying that you are overweight that you are also tall so on that basis as a BBW.

Larianne

The / inbetween means 'or'. So Big and Tall if its a guy or BBW if its a lady.

smallgarden

i heard from guy i met from pof that it has a reputation as a good spot to meet older women to gain experience if you know what i mean

i prefer okcs curvy description rather than few extra pounds on pof,just sounds nicer.average is dangerous one depending on persons view of what avg is,think avg size in uk is 16

Honey-ec

smallgarden wrote: »

i prefer okcs curvy description rather than few extra pounds on pof,just sounds nicer.average is dangerous one depending on persons view of what avg is,think avg size in uk is 16

Curvy is not and should not be a euphemism for carrying a few extra pounds. You can be curvy without being overweight. And just because size 16 is average, also doesn't make it not overweight. It just means that people as a whole are getting bigger.

Sorry, I know it's OT, but the increasing normalisation of being overweight is a big bug-bear of mine.

Back to the kids thing, someone in their 30s who's separated or divorced and has kids is one thing. But I'm getting absolutely loads of messages from lads in their very early 20s who have kids. But they're obviously single. How the hell are all these people getting caught out so much???

HellFireClub

Honey-ec wrote: »

Curvy is not and should not be a euphemism for carrying a few extra pounds. You can be curvy without being overweight. And just because size 16 is average, also doesn't make it not overweight. It just means that people as a whole are getting bigger.

Sorry, I know it's OT, but the increasing normalisation of being overweight is a big bug-bear of mine.

Back to the kids thing, someone in their 30s who's separated or divorced and has kids is one thing. But I'm getting absolutely loads of messages from lads in their very early 20s who have kids. But they're obviously single. How the hell are all these people getting caught out so much???

I think now on POF anyway, that could be a huge leap of an assumption! Lads at that age, kids or no kids, unless they are exceptionally mature (and most aren't), are just chasing one thing I think...

Piliger

Honey-ec wrote: »

I seem to be getting nothing but guys with kids lately. And they're all really young too. Did they do away with safe sex while I was off the market, or something??? So many very young, single dads out there.

It's something you need to consider when you consider dating ... how did they arrive at this point ? and what that means for me ?

njs030

Hang on though you can't classify people as being overweight due to a dress size. There's a huge difference between being a size 16 and 5ft2 or 5ft10. A 16 isn't overweight for a tall person!
To be honest I think the whole issue is easily solved by having a decent full length picture on your profile, some people like skinny, some don't. As previously said its not something anyone can hide on a date.

Piliger

HellFireClub wrote: »

Am noticing that most women I'm chatting to are in their 30's and either separated or divorced. That in itself wouldn't bother me, and I could date a girl with kids, but I'd worry if a few months down the road, I'd have a problem with it, if things got serious. It's a hard situation to call because you are basically judging someone by whether they have kids or not, and it doesn't seem right.

You could run into the most amazing woman who has 2 kids and is separated and probably going to apply for a divorce in due course, and she could be separated because her husband or ex partner was just an absolute arséhole and was cheating all around her. But she gets rid of him (which is a hard thing to do), and finds herself on a dating site and because she has kids, she gets basically set aside?

I know I'd have a lot to say about that if the shoe was on the other foot. But yet I don't want to date a girl with kids because I'd worry that if things got serious down the road, that I would still want to have my own kids with a partner and I'd probably not be blessed with the patience for an ex-husband/partner/father being in the equation on a weekly basis.

You are in serious danger of making a very deep and valid point there

This is exactly what you should be thinking. Dating a parent is WAY different than dating a single person. They have completely different priorities in life and a different attitude to loads of issues. And you are abs right about what happens if it get's moderately serious. A huge number of complex issues arise, like your role in the 'family' ... if you get attached to the kids and then break up ... believe me it is a minefield. Drop in to Relationship Issues on Boards and find out what I mean

PS: I'm a male parent of a 20yo

Larianne

notjustsweet wrote: »

Hang on though you can't classify people as being overweight due to a dress size. There's a huge difference between being a size 16 and 5ft2 or 5ft10. A 16 isn't overweight for a tall person!
To be honest I think the whole issue is easily solved by having a decent full length picture on your profile, some people like skinny, some don't. As previously said its not something anyone can hide on a date.

Hmm, I dunno about that. I'm 5'10 and a bit and I used to bigger, near verging on size 16 at one stage and I was fat. Plain and simple.

I agree that people should have at least one full length picture. Truth will be known once you go on a date. Why waste each others time.

njs030

Larianne wrote: »

Hmm, I dunno about that. I'm 5'10 and a bit and I used to bigger, near verging on size 16 at one stage and I was fat. Plain and simple.

I agree that people should have at least one full length picture. Truth will be known once you go on a date. Why waste each others time.

Ok well different people I suppose. I'm 5'9 and just under a 14 and definately not fat. When I was a 16 it was surely heavier but still not actually fat. Though i concede at that weight a few extra pounds would be the right choice. Though I would be curvy in the proper meaning of the word. Probably your body shape is totally different hence looking fatter at the same weight.
Either way pictures make the whole issue go away....and that's for lads too! The extreme close up shots of just a face looking up at the camera makes it look like they're hiding something!

smallgarden

what is jacked as a description of body type? and seriously all used up as a description is very odd!

Daveysil15

notjustsweet wrote: »

Glad you said that I'd noticed it too!! Also a sudden influx of messages from young lads!! I'm mid 30's yet the majority of messages are from men 26-29. What's that all about?

Maybe they've exhausted all their options in the 20's age group.

Larianne wrote: »

I'm 5'10 and a bit

notjustsweet wrote: »

I'm 5'9!

I've noticed there's a lot of tall women on POF. Just wondering if either of you would date a guy shorter than you? Some women state in their profiles that the guy must be tall. Not that I'm judging. It's understandable but would probably limit your options.

njs030

I'd date someone who was the same height as me or even an inch or so taller. I do like high heels and am used to being taller than people so that wouldn't really bother me-and doesn't seem to bother men either!
I wouldn't really be comfortable if he was shorter when we both had shoes off. Don't know why it just makes me uneasy!
It's easy enough to find men who are 5'9 or over to be honest, never found being tall was a limitation.