The Online Dating Thread 3..**READ 1ST POST Oct 2012**

cantdecide

openup wrote: »

I don't like not replying to people...but I'm beginning to think it's not worth it.

Just don't reply. It's the least of all evils. Guys are used to getting no replies.

cantdecide

Ankhyu wrote: »

Is there a way to hide your profile on OKC?

You can suspend your account or if you pay to use the site you can browse anonymously if that's what you're after.

riveratom

I say more power to you Honey-ec.

It's only natural to want to put your best put forward, especially when it comes to photos (even if it is only an experiment!), and to me a woman doing that is far sexier and more attractive than one with her falling around a bar or with her tongue sticking out, etc.

The Master

Been chatting to some nice girls over the last week or so, texting a particularly nice lady who lives near to me. Things looking good so far

mtjm

I'm on POF and am a full member for 3 months, there is a down side to being full member you can see when the person deleted the post (I don't mind seeing that they read it) but don't think it does good for your confindents.

I'm shy at best of time and unsure what to write, I can either put too much or too little, what do the ladies think? and have you notice lot more women are into sports and do sports? don't get me wrong I do watch an odd sport on TV but not into it like most blokes

Women online are more and more fussy these days, thinking of deleting the POF account once finished

Liam McPoyle

Just a quick update on the girl I met a wee while back.

Things are going really well,both profiles were deleted a couple of weeks ago.

We havnt had the "talk" yet but unless something hugely unforeseen happens I reckon we will be a couple sooner rather than later.

Piliger

Daveysil15 wrote: »

Yeah I agree there are a lot of terrible photos on dating sites, but a lot of that is down to the photographer. People get drunk at parties. People get burnt faces on holiday. What would you rather see? Professional photos done in a studio? Some people just can't take a decent photo.

You miss the point. We ALL have ghastly photos.

The issue is why would people put THOSE photos up on their profiles ??

Piliger

mtjm wrote: »

I'm on POF and am a full member for 3 months, there is a down side to being full member you can see when the person deleted the post (I don't mind seeing that they read it) but don't think it does good for your confindents.

Tell me about it.... lines and lines of "Read and Deleted" ........ and even a few "Unread and Deleted" !!!! :rolleyes:

HellFireClub

Piliger wrote: »

Tell me about it.... lines and lines of "Read and Deleted" ........ and even a few "Unread and Deleted" !!!! :rolleyes:

In fairness though (I'm not a full member but can remember the days when you could see deleted-read and deleted-unread mails), if someone can't be arsed even reading a mail you send them, they've probably saved you a load of hassle ending up on a date with them if they are that flaky.

CastorTroy

Piliger wrote: »

You miss the point. We ALL have ghastly photos.

The issue is why would people put THOSE photos up on their profiles ??

Best of a bad bunch? maybe that explains why so few women have their photo up compared to guys. At least from what I've seen

Galvasean

Piliger wrote: »

and even a few "Unread and Deleted" !!!! :rolleyes:

That used to drive me MAD (back when it wasn't for paid members only).The same users would still be on the site months later.
Pro tip number 1: You stand a better chance of reading a nice mail if you OPEN it.

grames_bond

Necronos wrote: »

Just a quick update on the girl I met a wee while back.

Things are going really well,both profiles were deleted a couple of weeks ago.

We havnt had the "talk" yet but unless something hugely unforeseen happens I reckon we will be a couple sooner rather than later.

few things:

1) congrats bro - dee-loir-eh for ya
2) get away outta that - you are ALREADY a couple , and (woo woo woo) you know it bro!!

Liam McPoyle

grames_bond wrote: »

1) congrats bro - dee-loir-eh for ya

Cheers buddeh!

grames_bond wrote: »

2) get away outta that - you are ALREADY a couple , and (woo woo woo) you know it bro!!

Well we are both into eachother,neither of us are or will be seeing anyone else,we are in contact every day and I get a bit gooey when I see her.



It snuck up on me damnit!

:pac:

Piliger

CastorTroy wrote: »

Best of a bad bunch? maybe that explains why so few women have their photo up compared to guys. At least from what I've seen

No doubt your right ...

But in response to that and several other comments above .... would the search for a partner not justify actually organising the taking of fresh, special, NEW photos ... specifically for the site ?

If we were selling our car we would do it ........

Daveysil15

Galvasean wrote: »

I'd say a lot of people find it hard to find photos of themselves where copious amounts of alcohol have not been involved and settle for them. That said, the question that pops into my head when I see such a profile is, "Have they nothing else?". I mean, I like to get buckled the odd time like most people, but it's not the be all and end all of my life.
actually, come to think of it I don't mention alcohol once in my profile and am sober in all of my photos. Maybe that's why nobody messages me these days? They probably think I'm a dry shyte

Piliger wrote: »

You miss the point. We ALL have ghastly photos.

The issue is why would people put THOSE photos up on their profiles ??

You raise an interesting point about the dry shyte. Some people may have very interesting and exciting hobbies, but have no pictures to prove it. They may just have a couple of self portraits taken with the out-stretched arm. People will see that and probably think they're boring or have no freinds. If you don't have the photos you don't have the photos.

Many people have no choice but to use those ghastly photos because that's all the have. As I pointed out already, the photographer is often to blame for this. Taking photos of people with the sun blaring in their eyes, (shoot in the shade for god's sake.) Blurry photos, photos with red eye etc. I'd say maybe 5% of the profiles on POF have decent photos.

cantdecide

Galvasean wrote: »

I'd say a lot of people find it hard to find photos of themselves where copious amounts of alcohol have not been involved ... They probably think I'm a dry shyte

Fair point but how many main profile pics show a lady licking, groping or somehow brandishing a bottle of their favourite whatever? Do guys do this too?

Maybe I'm just sensitised to it but I generally skip messaging these girls and it's mainly because I am a dry shyte Well, I always feel that girls who depict themselves in this manner and talking about how 'fun' and 'mad' they are usually have an ego clash issue with we with abstain meaning it will be difficult to find common ground.

CastorTroy

Piliger wrote: »

No doubt your right ...

But in response to that and several other comments above .... would the search for a partner not justify actually organising the taking of fresh, special, NEW photos ... specifically for the site ?

If we were selling our car we would do it ........

Yeah but you take the pics of your car. How many guys or girls would ask their friend to take a photo of them for their online dating profile? I suppose as pointed out by Daveys, this is why they probably do the self portrait either from above or in a mirror.

Piliger

CastorTroy wrote: »

Yeah but you take the pics of your car. How many guys or girls would ask their friend to take a photo of them for their online dating profile? I suppose as pointed out by Daveys, this is why they probably do the self portrait either from above or in a mirror.

Jeeez... I asked my son to take one of me ... people need to get a perspective on this. Are they playing with OD and wasting their time ? or are the serious ? I mean this is about the next several years, or maybe even more, of people's lives. How hard can it be to ask someone to take a photo ? say it's for their facebook page, or a pen friend in Togo .... or whatever it takes

Honey-ec

CastorTroy wrote: »

How many guys or girls would ask their friend to take a photo of them for their online dating profile?

I did! The amount of profiles I've seen that I've gone "They honestly think is the best photo of themselves in existence???" The mind boggles, it really does.

Having said that, I've also stated several times that I ignore profiles with only one pic up, having been caught out once or twice back when I started online dating. Everyone* has that ONE photo of themselves that makes them look a hundred times better than they do in real life.

*Well, most people. Not the people we're talking about, who only seem to have bad photos.

Galvasean

Daveysil15 wrote: »

You raise an interesting point about the dry shyte. Some people may have very interesting and exciting hobbies, but have no pictures to prove it. They may just have a couple of self portraits taken with the out-stretched arm. People will see that and probably think they're boring or have no freinds. If you don't have the photos you don't have the photos.

In my defense, my photos show me doing really exciting stuff, just not with alcohol (well in one case I do actually have a beer in my hand, it's just been cropped out).

Honey-ec wrote: »

Everyone* has that ONE photo of themselves that makes them look a hundred times better than they do in real life.

I know I do!!!

Dolly Daydreams

Haven't been on this thread for a while but just briefly caught up on the last few pages.
And what I want to add is:

1) Most people have uploaded pictures of them in a social scenario because most of us don't have people ready to take pics when we're reading books/cooking dinner/climbing mount Kilimanjaro
2) Honey-ec, yes I reckon that experiment backfired somewhat, but hey, if you look good in a bikini then it saves the guy wondering if you're going to turn up a lot heavier than you stated on your profile and save a lot of blushes. Which has come up before in this thread that women/men have done. If it was an ego boost, then we're all entitled to them as well..
3) I can't believe how some of you posters have been going at it so long, some of you seem like experts now when you're replying to the newbies. Some of the funniest/heartbreaking/scariest date experiences ever have been on these threads and for that I thank you.. At least we can entertain ourselves at the end of the day

Daveysil15

JennyBurke101 wrote: »

I am going to die alone .....seriously .....I dont know if its because I am 21 ....and my age bracket just seems to be full of idiots ....or what but seriously....I have never felt as awful as I do now ....I just cant seem to win!!!!

Ahh you're only 21 for god's sake. You're still very young and have lots of time.

doovdela wrote: »

The nicest guys in the corners in bars are the ones to take note they too shy!?

Yep, the nice guys usually finish last.

Galvasean

Daveysil15 wrote: »

Yep, the nice guys usually finish last.

Bullcrap!

I'm a horrible excuse for a human being and I'm not faring any better. :pac:

Northclare

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Northclare

Dolly Daydreams wrote: »

Haven't been on this thread for a while but just briefly caught up on the last few pages.
And what I want to add is:

1) Most people have uploaded pictures of them in a social scenario because most of us don't have people ready to take pics when we're reading books/cooking dinner/climbing mount Kilimanjaro
2) Honey-ec, yes I reckon that experiment backfired somewhat, but hey, if you look good in a bikini then it saves the guy wondering if you're going to turn up a lot heavier than you stated on your profile and save a lot of blushes. Which has come up before in this thread that women/men have done. If it was an ego boost, then we're all entitled to them as well..
3) I can't believe how some of you posters have been going at it so long, some of you seem like experts now when you're replying to the newbies. Some of the funniest/heartbreaking/scariest date experiences ever have been on these threads and for that I thank you.. At least we can entertain ourselves at the end of the day

Hi dolly you said it as it is lol

Fair play to ya

Northclare

Honey-ec wrote: »

CastorTroy wrote: »

How many guys or girls would ask their friend to take a photo of them for their online dating profile?

I did! The amount of profiles I've seen that I've gone "They honestly think is the best photo of themselves in existence???" The mind boggles, it really does.

Having said that, I've also stated several times that I ignore profiles with only one pic up, having been caught out once or twice back when I started online dating. Everyone* has that ONE photo of themselves that makes them look a hundred times better than they do in real life.

*Well, most people. Not the people we're talking about, who only seem to have bad photos.

Honey I think people are entitled to put up that one pic of themselves that makes them look a hundred times better,if that makes them feel confident so be it.

I'm average looking,I don't think I'll go down that road into judgment of people's looks because I'm sure I'm not attractive to a lot on POF.

I definitely steer well clear of the princesses,and I do get mail from them,they are more into my big dog than me lol

miamee

Northclare wrote: »

Honey I think people are entitled to put up that one pic of themselves that makes them look a hundred times better,if that makes them feel confident so be it.

I'm average looking,I don't think I'll go down that road into judgment of people's looks because I'm sure I'm not attractive to a lot on POF.

I definitely steer well clear of the princesses,and I do get mail from them,they are more into my big dog than me lol

On the flip side of the coin, if you put up just one pic of yourself where you look amazing but no pics of you on an "average" day, then the other persons expectations of what you look like are unrealistic and it can be off putting when someone doesn't look at all like their picture. I have been on both sides of that particular scenario so now I put my best pic as main photo but include one or two others.

Honey-ec

Northclare wrote: »

Honey I think people are entitled to put up that one pic of themselves that makes them look a hundred times better,if that makes them feel confident so be it.

They're perfectly entitled to do it, but I do think they're also setting themselves up for disappointment if they meet someone who then gets the shock of their life because they look nothing like that pic in reality. It's the exact same as using a picture that's donkeys years old, or one where you're a couple of stone lighter/heavier than your current weight.

Northclare

I know that but God love them they need confidence.
I know some women and men who suffer from anxiety due to their looks.

My photo of me is at my roughest rough and ready

Honey-ec

Northclare wrote: »

I know that but God love them they need confidence.
I know some women and men who suffer from anxiety due to their looks.

I would have thought it would be much more of a confidence knocker to go on loads of first dates, never get past that and be constantly wondering why.