The Online Dating Thread 3..**READ 1ST POST Oct 2012**

jimbobaloobob

save your energy. close off the topic with him

Piliger

miamee wrote: »

God lads, two months after about 3 dates with one guy, I am still being asked by him why it didn't work out and can we try again. Trying to be nice about it but not getting very far

Continuing the discussion is not being nice. It is being complicit in his obsession. Don't answer any more.

Piliger

Mr_Spaceman wrote: »

Do dates always come along like Dublin buses?

I've had no luck with OD for ages, but I have (ahem) not one, but two dates tomorrow!

The first date is a coffee at 2pm and the second is a drink at 6pm. Both ladies seem interesting but we've just exchanged maybe 3-4 messages then straight to the date.

Somebody stop me!

Fantastic .... just make sure you remember which one told you what and which one told you which ........ :rolleyes:

Piliger

Galvasean wrote: »

Got an email informing me I had a mail on OKC so logged in no mail...
Damn their dirty tricks!
I'm staying off OD... I mean it this time! :pac:

I haven't had a message from a lady on OKC, or a reply to a message, for more than three weeks and the list they offer are always the same group of about 10 WTF

Larianne

Armaghmagic wrote: »

Completely out of the blue but I have a dinner date tonight at 9. The unexpected dates are always the best, hope this doesn't disappoint :-)

I admire your persistance and 'don't give a fuk' attitude.

Piliger wrote: »

Fantastic .... just make sure you remember which one told you what and which one told you which ........ :rolleyes:

Yeah, that can be awkward! :pac:

miamee

Piliger wrote: »

miamee wrote: »

God lads, two months after about 3 dates with one guy, I am still being asked by him why it didn't work out and can we try again. Trying to be nice about it but not getting very far

Continuing the discussion is not being nice. It is being complicit in his obsession. Don't answer any more.

Just gave him a very definite no there, message received. Finally. No more chatting.

missrandomer

Piliger wrote: »

I haven't had a message from a lady on OKC, or a reply to a message, for more than three weeks and the list they offer are always the same group of about 10 WTF

Maby try changing your pic or some of the wording of your profile.
might help.

im thinking of changing mine around aswel

Mr_Spaceman

Piliger wrote: »

Fantastic .... just make sure you remember which one told you what and which one told you which ........ :rolleyes:

Yeah totally... I'll make sure I'm properly focused and on the ball there!

I'm quite laid back and not one for grand expectations. I'll just take things as they come, but at least tomorrow should be, hopefully, fun!

cantdecide

I've taken a break from the whole thing for the last couple of weeks now. I think I'll continue staying away for another while but I'm wondering if I'll think about a different site when I go back to it.

I had noticed that profiles down this way were on pretty short supply on OKC. In far from rapid succession, I had messaged virtually everyone I considered worth messaging in a short couple of weeks.

I'm just wondering for those outside Dublin, is it worth noting which sites gave you the best/ most matches in your area? I don't know if different sites are more popular in different areas but it seemed that there were about five times more results when I was on POF a couple of years ago compared to my OKC experience this time.

HellFireClub

Well I've an agreement in principle for a date either this evening or maybe tomorrow, depending on what we at. Kinda like this girl and her written sense of humour anyway, seems to be on my wavelength! Have 2-3 other things on the back burner, have to say, since I've completely changed my attitude to OD, I've had no small amount of luck with it!

missrandomer

Thought i would sign into pof. Just wondering though, as i went to sign in, i could search away without a login, personally i dont want everyone to see me in there, is there a way of making your profile private, to only pof users and maby just to guys aswel

HellFireClub

missrandomer wrote: »

Thought i would sign into pof. Just wondering though, as i went to sign in, i could search away without a login, personally i dont want everyone to see me in there, is there a way of making your profile private, to only pof users and maby just to guys aswel

Yeah there is a setting on the profile settings where if you tick the box, you will not show up as having viewed other people's profiles... But then they won't know that you are checking them out, and won't be able to check you back out themselves haha!

Larianne

missrandomer wrote: »

Thought i would sign into pof. Just wondering though, as i went to sign in, i could search away without a login, personally i dont want everyone to see me in there, is there a way of making your profile private, to only pof users and maby just to guys aswel

As far as I know, no. You've the hide profile option but then you hide your profile from everyone.

lg01

Hey gents, new to his thread and sorry if these questions were answered before but 299 pages is a lot to go through! I've done a fair bit of online dating before but now single again for the first time in a while. Just wanted to know what the general concensis is on the various different sites etc? I used to use POF but have not done too much on it. I gave badoo a try and got a date pretty quickly with a lovely little eastern european girl. I also tried Tagged but i think a lot of the profiels seem fake, are they? What other sites or mobile apps etc are worth trying?

missrandomer

HellFireClub wrote: »

Yeah there is a setting on the profile settings where if you tick the box, you will not show up as having viewed other people's profiles... But then they won't know that you are checking them out, and won't be able to check you back out themselves haha!

thanks, thats what i was thinking. so basically when you sign up anyone can view your profile, boys, girls and non pof users.

Thought it would be more like okc where you can click a button and you can only be viewed by okc users.

Sure anyone could use any of the pics that anyone puts up if thats the case!:rolleyes:

Piliger

Badoo: Can anyone give some pointers on how this operates ? Is chat the same as sending a message ? because it looks like it opens a chat straight to the person which I don't necessarily want Any indication of when people are on line ? any tricks and tips ?

HellFireClub

missrandomer wrote: »

thanks, thats what i was thinking. so basically when you sign up anyone can view your profile, boys, girls and non pof users.

Thought it would be more like okc where you can click a button and you can only be viewed by okc users.

Sure anyone could use any of the pics that anyone puts up if thats the case!:rolleyes:

I don't think that functionality is there on POF. If you hide your profile for searching purposes, I think it's hidden in totality, not just from POF users or non-POF users...

Piliger

HellFireClub wrote: »

I don't think that functionality is there on POF. If you hide your profile for searching purposes, I think it's hidden in totality, not just from POF users or non-POF users...

I believe it is hidden from everyone except those you have already messaged.

Piliger

missrandomer wrote: »

Sure anyone could use any of the pics that anyone puts up if thats the case!:rolleyes:

While that may be the case... I am not sure ... a few minutes on the web and you can see that there are literally millions of available photos of people on all kinds of sites across the world.

missrandomer

Piliger wrote: »

While that may be the case... I am not sure ... a few minutes on the web and you can see that there are literally millions of available photos of people on all kinds of sites across the world.

i know, but i just would have thought it would be more private to only pof users.

On another note, Im logged in a half an hour and im already thinking of deleting my account. People just being vile for no reason, im shocked at some of the messages tbh

fibix

missrandomer wrote: »

Sure anyone could use any of the pics that anyone puts up if thats the case!:rolleyes:

My pics were stolen from POF. I was messaging this guy on another site and had no pics up in my profile. I emailed him few... and silence. That's a great ego boost, isn't it? After a week he says hi again. So I asked him what had happened. And he says: "I already got this pics from somebody else, are you a dude?". Can't describe how I felt when I found out. It's like somebody stealing your personality or something. So disturbing. It actually made me want to stay away from internet period.

You know what they say: once you leave anything in the cyberspace it will live there forever.

Esoteric_

missrandomer wrote: »

i know, but i just would have thought it would be more private to only pof users.

On another note, Im logged in a half an hour and im already thinking of deleting my account. People just being vile for no reason, im shocked at some of the messages tbh

What do you mean by vile? Penis pictures and dirty messages are par for the course, to be honest. Just report and block. There are plenty of decent people on the site too.

CastorTroy

Just thinking, since I saw a "chat with..." option on POF. I know it's been there all the time but now wondering do people ever make first contact with it and how do you get on if you do?

Armaghmagic

Armaghmagic wrote: »

Completely out of the blue but I have a dinner date tonight at 9. The unexpected dates are always the best, hope this doesn't disappoint :-)

Met up with her but ended up not going for dinner......ended up not going home either. Definitely didn't disappoint :-)

Larianne

CastorTroy wrote: »

Just thinking, since I saw a "chat with..." option on POF. I know it's been there all the time but now wondering do people ever make first contact with it and how do you get on if you do?

I did not like when guys would try to start a chat conversation with me. I've never met anyone that way. But that's just me..

Piliger

CastorTroy wrote: »

Just thinking, since I saw a "chat with..." option on POF. I know it's been there all the time but now wondering do people ever make first contact with it and how do you get on if you do?

I would never use it to introduce myself or chat with someone for the first time.

missrandomer

LyndaMcL wrote: »

What do you mean by vile? Penis pictures and dirty messages are par for the course, to be honest. Just report and block. There are plenty of decent people on the site too.

Yeah well i was shocked by them kinda pics but it was more so the comments from one or two in particular. i hadnt even put pics up when one guy started making nasty comments and then when i put pics up well that just started him off again.

i swear i was nearly in tears! Never had anything like that on okc.

But i guess your right, there probably is some nice guys on it too, its just people like that just ruin it for everyone imo

Larianne

Block straight away missR. You get a lot of people trolling those sites.

Honey-ec

CastorTroy wrote: »

Just thinking, since I saw a "chat with..." option on POF. I know it's been there all the time but now wondering do people ever make first contact with it and how do you get on if you do?

I was very rarely online from anything other than my phone anyway, but I always ignored chat requests from people I hadn't already been messaging. It's just a bit too full-on for a first contact for me.

Anyway, I've deleted my POF profile. I'd been seeing a lovely guy who told me the other day he's mad about me. He was everything I could have wished for but my heart just wasn't in it, and after a lot of soul-searching about why, I had to admit to myself that I'm still in love with my husband. There's absolutely nothing happening there, my marriage is well and truly over, but it made me realise that it there was no point in me trying to meet someone and that I was being downright unfair to the other party.

It was a bit of a shock to me, to be honest. I genuinely thought I was ready to move on.

Galvasean

Sad to hear that Honey-ec. Well, at least you know what the problem is now. Hopefully you'll be able to move on in time. No point forcing it.