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The Online Dating Thread 3..**READ 1ST POST Oct 2012**

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    #6722
    Mental Mickey
    Registered Users Posts: 10,643 ✭✭✭✭Mental Mickey


    Chazz Michael Michaels wrote: »
    I get that also. I'm not a bad looking guy and I do very well with women in real life, I just keep meeting idiots so I thought I would try this. In the OD world I may as well be Shrek. It's an odd culture.

    I don't. Which is why I'm trying this route.


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    #6723
    Chazz Michael Michaels
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,822 ✭✭✭Chazz Michael Michaels


    Mental Mickey wrote: »
    I don't. Which is why I'm trying this route.

    That's a shame. I think OD is a load of rubbish, in my opinion. I mean, I'm not tooting my horn here, but I get very attractive and intelligent women in real life. In OD, I have messaged some women that I wouldn't exactly be blown away by physically, and yet I get nothing.

    My advice would be to find social events to attend. For example, I went to a language exchange night out last night. Got the number of this very attractive girl.

    F*ck you OD. :)


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    #6724
    andreac
    Registered Users Posts: 8,000 ✭✭✭andreac


    Mental Mickey wrote: »
    How often though??? Don't wanna come over as desperate/stalkerish :D

    Mail once and leave it, if they dont reply they obviously arent interested, so just keep looking and mailing people you like.


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    #6725
    Mental Mickey
    Registered Users Posts: 10,643 ✭✭✭✭Mental Mickey


    andreac wrote: »
    Mail once and leave it, if they dont reply they obviously arent interested, so just keep looking and mailing people you like.

    Or maybe they're just not online that often?


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    #6726
    cyrusdvirus
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,752 ✭✭✭cyrusdvirus


    andreac wrote: »
    Mail once and leave it, if they dont reply they obviously arent interested, so just keep looking and mailing people you like.

    could not agree more!!!

    Once i mailed a girl, couple of weeks later mailed her again cos she had a different picture up.

    Got a message back saying i was a number of different of forms of pathetic for mailing her twice.

    Sent her back one telling her not to worry, it wouldn't be happening again cos i didn't just want a pretty face, but also a personality the exact opposite of medusa.


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    #6727
    Mental Mickey
    Registered Users Posts: 10,643 ✭✭✭✭Mental Mickey


    gatecrash wrote: »
    could not agree more!!!

    Once i mailed a girl, couple of weeks later mailed her again cos she had a different picture up.

    Got a message back saying i was a number of different of forms of pathetic for mailing her twice.

    Sent her back one telling her not to worry, it wouldn't be happening again cos i didn't just want a pretty face, but also a personality the exact opposite of medusa.

    LOL. I haven't mailed her since the first one a couple of days ago.


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    #6728
    andreac
    Registered Users Posts: 8,000 ✭✭✭andreac


    Mental Mickey wrote: »
    Or maybe they're just not online that often?
    Unlikely. If she looked at your profile and hasn't replied she's not interested. If I had a euro for all the people I mailed and Who didn't reply id be rich,lol.


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    #6729
    Mental Mickey
    Registered Users Posts: 10,643 ✭✭✭✭Mental Mickey


    andreac wrote: »
    Unlikely. If she looked at your profile and hasn't replied she's not interested. If I had a euro for all the people I mailed and Who didn't reply id be rich,lol.

    Blocked me. Dammit. :-(


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    #6730
    Daveysil15
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,301 ✭✭✭Daveysil15


    HellFireClub wrote: »
    What's wrong with Satanists?!?

    What's right with them?!?


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    #6731
    andreac
    Registered Users Posts: 8,000 ✭✭✭andreac


    Why did you message her again??


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    #6732
    Mental Mickey
    Registered Users Posts: 10,643 ✭✭✭✭Mental Mickey


    andreac wrote: »
    Why did you message her again??

    Brain in the wrong place lol.


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    #6733
    Liam McPoyle
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,846 ✭✭✭✭Liam McPoyle


    Mental Mickey wrote: »

    Brain in the wrong place lol.

    You were posting in the last thread for months about online dating,your posts over the last few days are as though you never used it before,am I missing something?

    You ask for advice,ignore it,then complain when you get blocked.

    :confused:


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    #6734
    Esoteric_
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,255 ✭✭✭✭Esoteric_


    Necronos wrote: »
    You were posting in the last thread for months about online dating,your posts over the last few days are as though you never used it before,am I missing something?

    You ask for advice,ignore it,then complain when you get blocked.

    :confused:

    And you asked about whether you should message her again today, and were told no. But, I gave you the exact same advice about 2 days ago to the same question!

    You really should take the advice you're given on-board, mate.


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    #6735
    cloud_dancer
    Registered Users Posts: 198 ✭✭cloud_dancer


    Mental Mickey wrote: »

    Brain in the wrong place lol.

    At least you know what she's like now. Blocking someone after one message is a bout harsh. I would only block someone if they were rude or being stalkerish.


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    #6736
    riveratom
    Registered Users Posts: 964 ✭✭✭riveratom


    Look, mail once, if no reply - move on!!

    I don't even check the 'who viewed me' on POF anymore, no need, I just give the ones who reply to my mails all the attention :) And I don't email that much anymore anyway - gotta be selective!


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    #6737
    Mental Mickey
    Registered Users Posts: 10,643 ✭✭✭✭Mental Mickey


    riveratom wrote: »
    Look, mail once, if no reply - move on!!

    I don't even check the 'who viewed me' on POF anymore, no need, I just give the ones who reply to my mails all the attention :) And I don't email that much anymore anyway - gotta be selective!

    I haven't received ANY mails so I've got nothing to go on.:rolleyes:


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    #6738
    cloud_dancer
    Registered Users Posts: 198 ✭✭cloud_dancer


    Mental Mickey wrote: »

    I haven't received ANY mails so I've got nothing to go on.:rolleyes:

    Maybe try other ways of meeting girls outside of online dating. Try joining clubs, I'm sure you could find something you'd be interested in. volunteer work is another great way to meet people. I volunteer and there are lots of people in my age group volunteering for the charity I work with. If I hadn't been seeing someone on/off this year it would have been a great avenue to meet people. You may also find the type of people you meet through volunteering are more patient, compassionate and willing to look past your disability than most women on dating sites would be. Meeting people IRL will give you the opportunity to let your personality shine through.

    Sounds like OD is just not suiting you as you tend to just focus on one person that you really like and forget the rest. That strategy doesn't work for many people.


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    #6739
    Mental Mickey
    Registered Users Posts: 10,643 ✭✭✭✭Mental Mickey


    cloud_dancer wrote: »
    Maybe try other ways of meeting girls outside of online dating. Try joining clubs, I'm sure you could find something you'd be interested in. volunteer work is another great way to meet people. I volunteer and there are lots of people in my age group volunteering for the charity I work with. If I hadn't been seeing someone on/off this year it would have been a great avenue to meet people. You may also find the type of people you meet through volunteering are more patient, compassionate and willing to look past your disability than most women on dating sites would be. Meeting people IRL will give you the opportunity to let your personality shine through.

    Sounds like OD is just not suiting you as you tend to just focus on one person that you really like and forget the rest. That strategy doesn't work for many people.


    You're probably right about the "one person at a time" bit. I think that's the right way to do things??? Re: the compassionate bit: I I'm not looking for a sympathy date.............or someone to "look after" me. Which is what happens to most people with disabilities.


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    #6740
    Esoteric_
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,255 ✭✭✭✭Esoteric_


    Mickey, have you tried meet.com? It's a friendship based site AFAIK, where people just meet up to do things. I know a few people who have ended up with relationships out of that, because lots of friendships do turn to romance after time. :) Might suit you more than just focusing on one woman at a time on OD, because when making friends, there's no real risk of rejection and things can develop naturally instead of being based primarily on looks, as OD can be.


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    #6741
    Dermo73
    Registered Users Posts: 45 ✭Dermo73


    Mental Mickey wrote: »
    I haven't received ANY mails so I've got nothing to go on.:rolleyes:

    Mickey, It's a numbers game. Send lots of mails to different users. And I mean 1 per user, not multiple mails to the same one. Some of them will check out your profile and not reply. Some of them will ignore your message or read it and delete it. That's how it works. When you do get a response then you can focus on that person and try to get a dialogue going. Don't over analyse why they aren't responding. They may not be interested for a variety of reasons and you'll only go nuts trying to figure out why.


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    #6742
    Mental Mickey
    Registered Users Posts: 10,643 ✭✭✭✭Mental Mickey


    Dermo73 wrote: »
    Mickey, It's a numbers game. Send lots of mails to different users. And I mean 1 per user, not multiple mails to the same one. Some of them will check out your profile and not reply. Some of them will ignore your message or read it and delete it. That's how it works. When you do get a response then you can focus on that person and try to get a dialogue going. Don't over analyse why they aren't responding. They may not be interested for a variety of reasons and you'll only go nuts trying to figure out why.

    Cheers.


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    #6743
    Dermo73
    Registered Users Posts: 45 ✭Dermo73


    I think meetup.com is the group Lynda referred to. I can vouch for it. I go along to a variety of events through that site and it's great for meeting new people, doing new stuff, getting out and and making new friends. There's a range of events every week and there's something to suit everyone. Plus, it's free :-)


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    #6744
    Mental Mickey
    Registered Users Posts: 10,643 ✭✭✭✭Mental Mickey


    Dermo73 wrote: »
    I think meetup.com is the group Lynda referred to. I can vouch for it. I go along to a variety of events through that site and it's great for meeting new people, doing new stuff, getting out and and making new friends. There's a range of events every week and there's something to suit everyone. Plus, it's free :-)

    I suppose I'm over-analyzing, but will this site have events that are accessible??


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    #6745
    Esoteric_
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,255 ✭✭✭✭Esoteric_


    Dermo73 wrote: »
    I think meetup.com is the group Lynda referred to. I can vouch for it. I go along to a variety of events through that site and it's great for meeting new people, doing new stuff, getting out and and making new friends. There's a range of events every week and there's something to suit everyone. Plus, it's free :-)

    Cheers mate, I was sure I'd gotten the name wrong but couldn't remember the exact name as I've never used it. :pac:

    Mickey, I'd imagine that as there are a range of events every week, at least SOME of them will be accessible. :)


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    #6746
    Dermo73
    Registered Users Posts: 45 ✭Dermo73


    Mental Mickey wrote: »
    I suppose I'm over-analyzing, but will this site have events that are accessible??

    Events are usually held in pubs, clubs, restaurants, etc. I guess it would depend on the specific venue and event. You have the net. Check out the site. I'd suggest the "new and not so new" group because they have the most events and most venues they use would be accessible. You can message the event organiser and ask them about an event you're interested in. They're normally very friendly. Good luck with it :D


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    #6747
    The Master
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 14,316 CMod ✭✭✭✭The Master


    Amusing thing I saw on POF last night.

    A girl whom it seems was a bit tired of getting penis pics sent to her changed her profile picture to one of the pics of a fully nude guy that had been sent to her and changed her headline to the guys username and a not so nice comment about his manhood.
    She changed it back after an hour or so. I'd like to think the guy in question learned his lesson but I did chuckle when it happened :)


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    #6748
    Daveysil15
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,301 ✭✭✭Daveysil15


    Lately I feel like I'm in chat room with OD. So many girls I have chatted to, messaging back and forth. It seems to be going well. Then when I suggest a date they just stop replying. Although one girl told me she wasn't interested after 2 days of chatting. It would have been easier to tell me that at the start.


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    #6749
    cloud_dancer
    Registered Users Posts: 198 ✭✭cloud_dancer


    @mickey

    Maybe I worded it wrong. I didn't mean that you'd want a sympathy date, no one would want that, more that the type of people you may meet outside of OD might look past your disability and get to know you as a person. With online dating it's all superficial and if you don't tick someones boxes then they won't even look at you. I'm sure you are even doing this yourself in a way with the girls you are contacting or else you'd be messaging lots of girls. You said before there are few girls your type on online dating sites.


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    #6750
    Mental Mickey
    Registered Users Posts: 10,643 ✭✭✭✭Mental Mickey


    cloud_dancer wrote: »
    @mickey

    Maybe I worded it wrong. I didn't mean that you'd want a sympathy date, no one would want that, more that the type of people you may meet outside of OD might look past your disability and get to know you as a person. With online dating it's all superficial and if you don't tick someones boxes then they won't even look at you. I'm sure you are even doing this yourself in a way with the girls you are contacting or else you'd be messaging lots of girls. You said before there are few girls your type on online dating sites.

    You're right............I think it is superficial!!!??? From experience(not much, obviously), I think unless you're 6 ft plus, and look like George Clooney, you're not gonna get looked at on dating sites, and anything outside the "norm" is ignored......?


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    #6751
    Esoteric_
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,255 ✭✭✭✭Esoteric_


    Mental Mickey wrote: »
    You're right............I think it is superficial!!!??? From experience(not much, obviously), I think unless you're 6 ft plus, and look like George Clooney, you're not gonna get looked at on dating sites, and anything outside the "norm" is ignored......?

    I don't think that's right at all, because if you're 6 foot plus and look like George Clooney, it's highly unlikely that you'd be on a dating site in the first place.

    I think it's more a case of you focusing on one woman at a time instead of emailing lots of different women. If I email 10 men, I'll probably hear back from 6 or 7 of them (because I'm female, we do tend to get more replies, let's face it). Do I cry over the 3 that didn't reply? No, I concentrate on talking to the others, none of whom would look like George Clooney, I assure you.


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