The Online Dating Thread 3..**READ 1ST POST Oct 2012**

the west wing

Well I was out of the country for over a week and he lives on the opposite side of the country and works 6 nights a week. He has never suggested to meet up unlike other guys. So I dunno? I've had other guys really interested in me so I think I'm just going to tell him I'm not interested.

MarkyTheLips

the west wing wrote: »

Yeah I think you guys are right. Thanks for the replies!

Welcome sad part is he's probably chuffed with himself as quite the ladies man :pac: .. I'd a date organised last sat and she postponed til the following night.. i dropped a text to organise a time and heard nothing back until later that night.. "Sorry didn't see your text 'til now figured you didn't want to meet up!" then nothing 'til a text today asking what I'm up to tonight
My @rse is roasting on this back-burner..:rolleyes:

dub5

MarkyTheLips wrote: »

Welcome sad part is he's probably chuffed with himself as quite the ladies man :pac: .. I'd a date organised last sat and she postponed til the following night.. i dropped a text to organise a time and heard nothing back until later that night.. "Sorry didn't see your text 'til now figured you didn't want to meet up!" then nothing 'til a text today asking what I'm up to tonight
My @rse is roasting on this back-burner..:rolleyes:

I honestly think that people, both men and women, just use the on line dating out of boredom. Saying that, that is why I probably joined POF, as I was bored in the evening and it was fun chatting to people. But at the same time, I am single and I would like to met someone, so I am not a time waster. I just wish people would be honest with each other. I would rather someone to me "listen I am not interested, you are not my type etc", rather than this crap of ignoring each other. Really annoys me

coco_lola

dub5, I got a message today asking "Are you dub5?"

Methinks you are popular

dub5

coco_lola wrote: »

dub5, I got a message today asking "Are you dub5?"

Methinks you are popular

Send them my way PLEASE

MarkyTheLips

dub5 wrote: »

I honestly think that people, both men and women, just use the on line dating out of boredom. Saying that, that is why I probably joined POF, as I was bored in the evening and it was fun chatting to people. But at the same time, I am single and I would like to met someone, so I am not a time waster. I just wish people would be honest with each other. I would rather someone to me "listen I am not interested, you are not my type etc", rather than this crap of ignoring each other. Really annoys me

Chronic attention seekers will surface everywhere as well so they need to be waded through "validate meeee!!!! Kthxbai"..

At what point is it okay to suggest meeting up? Is there a specific timeframe?

Larianne

Karsini wrote: »

At what point is it okay to suggest meeting up? Is there a specific timeframe?

Really depends on how long you've been messaging the person - as in, are you spending an hour online messaging back and forth for a few days or sending just one message everyday.

If there is a lot of messages flying to and fro, I'd say around day 4-5 suggest meeting up. If its more single messages every day I would say 7-14 days.

Then again, it just really depends on how the conversation is going.

Have any of ye seen people you have been chatting to online/seen online about the place? I've seen two guys in the past week, in the same area! :eek: And I'm almost sure one dude served me in HMV last week. ha!

dub5

Karsini wrote: »

At what point is it okay to suggest meeting up? Is there a specific timeframe?

I suppose it depends on when you feel comfortable with meeting the person. I would never meet someone after a day of chatting. You should get a vibe from a person, that they are normal enough, and hopefully not a serial killer, after a while.

The first guy I met from on line, I was chatting to him for about a month prior before meeting. When I met him, there was no spark, although we got on well, and then after that, I decided not to wait that long to met someone, as I felt that I had wasted a month.

Normally I would wait a week at least.

MarkyTheLips

Karsini wrote: »

At what point is it okay to suggest meeting up? Is there a specific timeframe?

It's more down to the dynamic you have with the person in my experience. Usually after a couple of phone calls to find common ground/weaken the conversational ice before breaking it in person An advantage like already having a private joke with a person you've never met is gold in those situations. You'll feel when it's right but it isn't going to take ages, not if both parties have an interest.. Don't let things get stagnant or you'll end up messaging each other about the weather and wondering why she isn't enjoying the sun with you I went on a date the day I signed up to POF (really!) so there just isn't a hard and fast rule for me.

MarkyTheLips

Larianne wrote: »

Really depends on how long you've been messaging the person - as in, are you spending an hour online messaging back and forth for a few days or sending just one message everyday.

If there is a lot of messages flying to and fro, I'd say around day 4-5 suggest meeting up. If its more single messages every day I would say 7-14 days.

Then again, it just really depends on how the conversation is going.

Have any of ye seen people you have been chatting to online/seen online about the place? I've seen two guys in the past week, in the same area! :eek: And I'm almost sure one dude served me in HMV last week. ha!

A girl I went on a few dates with years ago turned up at my mates wedding as the receptionist at the hotel if that counts? That was a strange check-in experience.

Thanks. While I don't really have my eye on anyone in particular at the moment I'm still getting the hang of what to do and what not.

The only woman I've been in touch with fairly regularly has in her profile that she's seeing someone. She contacted me first though.

Larianne

MarkyTheLips wrote: »

A girl I went on a few dates with years ago turned up at my mates wedding as the receptionist at the hotel if that counts? That was a strange check-in experience.

I'm waiting to go to a beers or a restaurant or interview and meet someone I was chatting with. :pac: Ireland is very small.

Karsini - is that on OKcupid? Is she seeing someone? Does that not bother you?

dub5

Karsini wrote: »

Thanks. While I don't really have my eye on anyone in particular at the moment I'm still getting the hang of what to do and what not.

The only woman I've been in touch with fairly regularly has in her profile that she's seeing someone. She contacted me first though.

WHAT......She is seeing someone....so what is she on POF for?

Larianne

Larianne wrote: »

I'm waiting to go to a beers or a restaurant or interview and meet someone I was chatting with. :pac: Ireland is very small.

Karsini - is that on OKcupid? Is she seeing someone? Does that not bother you?

Yeah she's on OKCupid alright. I'm not taking it seriously at all, hence why I said I don't have my eyes on anyone in particular. I don't know if she is seeing anyone, never asked, but her profile says so.

MarkyTheLips

Karsini wrote: »

Thanks. While I don't really have my eye on anyone in particular at the moment I'm still getting the hang of what to do and what not.

The only woman I've been in touch with fairly regularly has in her profile that she's seeing someone. She contacted me first though.

http://www.google.ie/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=office%20gareth%20sidecar&source=web&cd=3&ved=0CF4QtwIwAg&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3D-1i7LQGdZyY&ei=egTdT-jbCIOWhQeCrc2hCg&usg=AFQjCNG7xZN9uIHbQA6TVaRZnXkfixS7eA


It's late and I've never embedded so excuse the link but that could be in your near future if you aren't careful

Hmm, looking back, anyone (except for one) who messaged me on OKCupid has themselves down as "Seeing someone" and "Looking for friends." Anyone I've messaged hasn't replied to me.

I don't know about this...

mood

catallus wrote: »

I think what he means is the ratio of men to women on the sites is so skewed that it's hard to get a man's profile to be noticed due to the sheer numbers of guys on the sites compared to women....Literally thousands of guys to a few hundred women....

Where is the evidence of that?

Varied

LOL what a disaster. She was an absolute nut. Never again will I do this.

Samich

Varied wrote: »

LOL what a disaster. She was an absolute nut. Never again will I do this.

Details?

Larianne

Varied wrote: »

LOL what a disaster. She was an absolute nut. Never again will I do this.

Oh no, what happened??

MarkyTheLips

So was my very first POF date wonder if it was her! Sorry to hear that

Larianne

In fairness, on my first internet date, the guy kept touching me, poked a bruise on my leg and tried lifting up my skirt. I've had nice dates since then. :pac:

MarkyTheLips

Larianne wrote: »

In fairness, on my first internet date, the guy kept touching me, poked a bruise on my leg and tried lifting up my skirt. I've had nice dates since then. :pac:

To be fair they could ONLY have gotten better Mine was REALLY different from what turned out to be her 5 year old photos and when I mentioned I'd had a long day at work to pre-empt her buying another round she slapped me in the face with both hands and said "That'll wake you up!!" :pac: my skirt thankfully went unlifted...

Varied

Ah it was goin well. She had a few drinks then it went messy, typical "men are evil" ****e. She then ****ed off to some random group of girls and never gave me a 2nd glance. I went over to her and said " I'll see ye later" to which she replied "yea whatever".

What a horrible experience.

smallgarden

Varied wrote: »

Ah it was goin well. She had a few drinks then it went messy, typical "men are evil" ****e. She then ****ed off to some random group of girls and never gave me a 2nd glance. I went over to her and said " I'll see ye later" to which she replied "yea whatever".

What a horrible experience.

Oh god that sounds awful,don't give up though,we all have bad dates.I think online dates tend to have higher failure rates as you've never met the person.I've had someone ask to hold my hand in cinema and have awkward reply of no thanks as didn't want to lead him on, and guy declaring his love to me and all over me like bad rash, hit myself in face with car door and came home with black eye.unfortunately people can be horrible and that was horrible behaviour but there are plenty of nice people out there

MarkyTheLips

Varied wrote: »

Ah it was goin well. She had a few drinks then it went messy, typical "men are evil" ****e. She then ****ed off to some random group of girls and never gave me a 2nd glance. I went over to her and said " I'll see ye later" to which she replied "yea whatever".

What a horrible experience.

Yikes... How did it go before she turned into Ms. Hyde? She say it was her first online date? Might have felt awkward or unsure how to act.. Stand-offish behaviour sometimes masks a feeling of being out of one's depth.. Or she could be a basket case

Piliger

I've done some of this through POF and a couple of other Irish sites. I have to say my experience was fine.

Were a couple of the women a bid annoying and odd ? Yep. But most were just normal women and only one or two I fancied. Did they look like their photos ? mmmmm... some didn't

But it was still WELL worth it. It enabled me to meet skidoodles more women that were actually available, within a month, than if I had spent a year in pubs and clubs and hobby classes.

And it also matters if you like people. I go out to meet people because I like people. Even if they are not hot to trot I still have a nice chat and a coffee or drink with them for an hour and to me it's not a waste. There is always something interesting in everyone.

If you focus solely and excessively, in a desperate way, on meeting the manor woman of your dreams then it will be disappointing.

I do understand it is harder for a woman. Of course. But from what I learned from the women I met, a lot of it comes down to choosing the right venue and being strong and courteous and being prepared in advance.

I would recommend it to anyone and may do it again sometimes soon myself.

Varied

It was going grand, she just turned into a complete nutter after a few drinks.

Larianne

Varied wrote: »

Ah it was goin well. She had a few drinks then it went messy, typical "men are evil" ****e. She then ****ed off to some random group of girls and never gave me a 2nd glance. I went over to her and said " I'll see ye later" to which she replied "yea whatever".

What a horrible experience.

I think a lot of ladies on those sites are not in the right frame of mind to date. Your experience isn't the first experience where the girl has had one to many drinks and went a bit loopy. Not all ladies are like that though. Not sure how you'd weed them out though?