The Online Dating Thread 3..**READ 1ST POST Oct 2012**

mood

Honey-ec wrote: »

If he's that hell-bent on stalking her, chances are he already knows when she's in the area.

No point in making it easy for someone!

Personally apart form the nutter aspect I wouldn't want to be approached by someone from a dating site while going about my daily business or out and about. If I don't want to communicate with them on the site then I certainly don't want to meet them in real life.

mood

Shapey Fiend wrote: »

Anybody else find themselves most frequently put off by the music people list? After i've discarded the Florence & The Machine fans and the people who stopped listening to anything new after they turned 16 it's slim pickings!

No. Someone's taste in music most likely would have little or no reflection on how you might get on etc.

Honey-ec

mood wrote: »

No point in making it easy for someone!

Personally apart form the nutter aspect I wouldn't want to be approached by someone from a dating site while going about my daily business or out and about. If I don't want to communicate with them on the site then I certainly don't want to meet them in real life.

I'd be amazed if anyone, ever, actually approached someone with their phone out and said "Hey look, it's you! Go out with me!" Sure if you're in town and get a notification that someone is nearby, what does that even mean? You could be standing at the top of Grafton St. and they're down at College Green and there's several thousand milling people in between and you'll never even see them.

On the other hand, someone may well get the notification, check out the profile, like what they see and message the person based on that. Perfectly fine, imo.

knucklehead6

mood wrote: »

No point in making it easy for someone!

Personally apart form the nutter aspect I wouldn't want to be approached by someone from a dating site while going about my daily business or out and about. If I don't want to communicate with them on the site then I certainly don't want to meet them in real life.

This!

Absolutely no way on gods green earth i would have the apps on my phone.

I have them on an i-touch, so i have that for when i'm cooking or something and i'm chatting with a girl on the sites. Plus it makes it easier having a small hand held unit rather than a laptop toasting my nuts!!

mood

Honey-ec wrote: »

I'd be amazed if anyone, ever, actually approached someone with their phone out and said "Hey look, it's you! Go out with me!" Sure if you're in town and get a notification that someone is nearby, what does that even mean? You could be standing at the top of Grafton St. and they're down at College Green and there's several thousand milling people in between and you'll never even see them.

On the other hand, someone may well get the notification, check out the profile, like what they see and message the person based on that. Perfectly fine, imo.

My gay friends use site with app alerts and they do meet people that way.

knucklehead6

Honey-ec wrote: »

I'd be amazed if anyone, ever, actually approached someone with their phone out and said "Hey look, it's you! Go out with me!" Sure if you're in town and get a notification that someone is nearby, what does that even mean? You could be standing at the top of Grafton St. and they're down at College Green and there's several thousand milling people in between and you'll never even see them.

On the other hand, someone may well get the notification, check out the profile, like what they see and message the person based on that. Perfectly fine, imo.

a little bit of dutch courage and you've no idea what a bloke could do!!

A person i know (who doesn't use the sites) would consider that great fun. He is a naturally outgoing lad, and with a pint or 2 on him he becomes even more chatty. He would think nothing out of going up to someone, phone in hand and starting up a conversation with them!

miamee

andreac wrote: »

Ive a date with a guy from POF tomorrow, really looking forward to it as we have spoken on the phone already and he sounds really nice, plus his pics look nice too, so fingers crossed!! He lives close by too which is great.

This sounds very promising and exciting - I hope it goes well!

riveratom

Honey-ec wrote: »

I'd be amazed if anyone, ever, actually approached someone with their phone out and said "Hey look, it's you! Go out with me!" Sure if you're in town and get a notification that someone is nearby, what does that even mean? You could be standing at the top of Grafton St. and they're down at College Green and there's several thousand milling people in between and you'll never even see them.

On the other hand, someone may well get the notification, check out the profile, like what they see and message the person based on that. Perfectly fine, imo.

Yep, I think the only way it could turn stalkerish is if you were sitting in the same cafe as the person or something, and even then they might not see you. Plus the chances of you both being in the same coffee shop at the exact same time must be absolutely infinitesimally small.

So the benefits to having it on likely outweigh the potential risks by a massive amount.

Honey-ec

knucklehead6 wrote: »

a little bit of dutch courage and you've no idea what a bloke could do!!

A person i know (who doesn't use the sites) would consider that great fun. He is a naturally outgoing lad, and with a pint or 2 on him he becomes even more chatty. He would think nothing out of going up to someone, phone in hand and starting up a conversation with them!

But the chances of him being in the actual exact same location as her are miniscule. What's he going to do, pop in and do a quick scan of every bar, restaurant, shop and cafe in the area in the hope of tracking her down?

Honey-ec

mood wrote: »

My gay friends use site with app alerts and they do meet people that way.

If you're talking about Grindr that's a completely different kettle of fish altogether.

magneticimpulse

riveratom wrote: »

Yep, I think the only way it could turn stalkerish is if you were sitting in the same cafe as the person or something, and even then they might not see you. Plus the chances of you both being in the same coffee shop at the exact same time must be absolutely infinitesimally small.

So the benefits to having it on likely outweigh the potential risks by a massive amount.

This happened to me before...Dublin is a very small city with some well known cafes...it's always the guy you never want to see again that it happens with as well

mood

Honey-ec wrote: »

If you're talking about Grindr that's a completely different kettle of fish altogether.

I'm not sure what site they use but there is a location alert and my friend got on in a pub. I think the other person was only a few meters away.

miamee

Honey-ec wrote: »

But the chances of him being in the actual exact same location as her are miniscule. What's he going to do, pop in and do a quick scan of every bar, restaurant, shop and cafe in the area in the hope of tracking her down?

The OKC app buzzed for me once on the bus home after work - not when you want to be meeting anyone after a long day in the office to be honest - he was sitting two seats in front of me on the bus so it can happen.

knucklehead6

Honey-ec wrote: »

But the chances of him being in the actual exact same location as her are miniscule. What's he going to do, pop in and do a quick scan of every bar, restaurant, shop and cafe in the area in the hope of tracking her down?

As i said he doesn't use the sites, but if he did, and happened to notice someone from them in a particular bar he would have no problem whatsoever going up to her.

Feck it, 2 weeks ago i was out in town and met an old school friend from 20 odd years ago....coincidences happen, and Dublin isn't THAT big a city

mood

I seen two men for the dating site I used in shops. One definitely saw me but we hadn't emailed so I didn't care. The other kept emailing me despite the fact that I explained 3 time that I was not interested etc. I have to hide and sneak out as he had freaked me out a bit.

hollypink

andreac wrote: »

Ive a date with a guy from POF tomorrow, really looking forward to it as we have spoken on the phone already and he sounds really nice, plus his pics look nice too, so fingers crossed!! He lives close by too which is great.

Good luck, sounds promising! I always think it's quite romantic going on dates at Christmas, with all the decorations up and cheesy music. Of course there are also quite a lot of Christmas jumper 12 pubs of Christmas groups in the pubs which isn't quite so romantic!

riveratom

hollypink wrote: »

Good luck, sounds promising! I always think it's quite romantic going on dates at Christmas, with all the decorations up and cheesy music. Of course there are also quite a lot of Christmas jumper 12 pubs of Christmas groups in the pubs which isn't quite so romantic!

I have one on Thursday so I'm hoping it'll be all festive and cosy where we are alright

knucklehead6

riveratom wrote: »

I have one on Thursday so I'm hoping it'll be all festive and cosy where we are alright

I've 2 suggestions/requests in. Both are nibbling without actually saying yes..... Or no! :-)

riveratom

knucklehead6 wrote: »

I've 2 suggestions/requests in. Both are nibbling without actually saying yes..... Or no! :-)

Gotta ratchet up the charm a level knucklehead!

knucklehead6

riveratom wrote: »

Gotta ratchet up the charm a level knucklehead!

Naah, feck that.

If someone doesn't like me from the way I come across on the sites which is as true to 'me' as I can be than I couldn't be bothered!! .

Mr_Spaceman

Meauldsegosha wrote: »

I wouldn't go to dinner on a first date, too hard to get away if its awarkward or whatever. I also don't like eating in front of people I don't know.

Especially if it's spag bol. Nightmare!

Shapey Fiend wrote: »

Anybody else find themselves most frequently put off by the music people list? After i've discarded the Florence & The Machine fans and the people who stopped listening to anything new after they turned 16 it's slim pickings!

As a mature, musically-obsessed gunslinger (or, erm, so I like to think) I'm keen to see other people's tastes. At least it gives you a hook for a bit of introductory chat etc.

I have to admit, any otherwise nice looking lady who lists R&B/Urban music, Abba and 80's cheese in their likes I jog on. It's too much - even for a mellow kinda guy like me. Florence is fine, though.

I'm a wee bit shallow that way.

Honey-ec

knucklehead6 wrote: »

As i said he doesn't use the sites, but if he did, and happened to notice someone from them in a particular bar he would have no problem whatsoever going up to her.

Feck it, 2 weeks ago i was out in town and met an old school friend from 20 odd years ago....coincidences happen, and Dublin isn't THAT big a city

Yeah, but that can happen completely independently of the "X is nearby" part of the app. I've recognised loads of lads out and about from POF. If that happens, and someone approaches you because of it, you can hardly blame the location-based services!

Larianne

Mr_Spaceman wrote: »

I have to admit, any otherwise nice looking lady who lists R&B/Urban music, Abba and 80's cheese in their likes I jog on. It's too much - even for a mellow kinda guy like me. Florence is fine, though.

I'm a wee bit shallow that way.

And that's why I don't have my musical taste down on my profile! :pac:

knucklehead6

Unsolicited, no picture 'Hi' mail. Minimal profile.

Took a chance and mailed her back. Having a nice conversation for the evening. And got a picture too. A NICE picture!

Honey-ec

I'm on the verge of giving up again. I seem to attract extremely, erm, alternative types on OKC and there's no way in hell I'm going back to the cesspit that is POF.

My new Facebook profiler:

knucklehead6

Honey-ec wrote: »

I'm on the verge of giving up again. I seem to attract extremely, erm, alternative types on OKC and there's no way in hell I'm going back to the cesspit that is POF.

My new Facebook profiler:

You just have no confidence with the brown gruaig honey. Soon as you go back blonde you'll be flyin high again.

Honey-ec

knucklehead6 wrote: »

You just have no confidence with the brown gruaig honey. Soon as you go back blonde you'll be flyin high again.

Well aside from looking like the last person to hear that the Cure split up, every mail I've had over the last few days seems to have been from Rain Man/John Nash types.

I don't know if any of you have ever read the book "House of Leaves", but they all seem to be channeling Mark Danielewski...

knucklehead6

Honey-ec wrote: »

Well aside from looking like the last person to hear that the Cure split up, every mail I've had over the last few days seems to have been from Rain Man/John Nash types.

In the film John Nash pulled Jennifer Connoly. Nothing wrong with that IMO!!

The Master

Honey-ec wrote: »

Well aside from looking like the last person to hear that the Cure split up

Thank you, so many people to use this on tomorrow

DerekDGoldfish

But the Cure havent split up, still probably the best band still touring. I dont trust somoene who doesnt like the Cure.