Things to do in an airport

beks101

Hello AHers,

So my flight from Toronto to Denver has been delayed two hours. Which leaves me with sh1tloads of excited energy and too much free time in an airport.

What should I do? Hit the bar and get buckled? Take a ride on the conveyor belts? Screw with the security guys? Befriend the angry-looking business dude beside me? Get myself arrested?

Let's hear it After Hours.

SouthTippBass

Sit quietly and wait for your flight.

aaronjumper

Blast them with. . . anecdotal adventures of your past and maybe get them to tell you a story or two.

hairyprincess

1. Fap
2. Fap
3. Fap.

In that order

im invisible

Watch the planes

shopaholic01

Hit the bar and then screw with the security guards.

dr.bollocko

John Denver? He died in a plane crash.

That's not funny.

DrumSteve

Read a book?

beks101

SouthTippBass wrote: »

Sit quietly and wait for your flight.

You sound like a right laugh.

Diamond_Ninja

Run around with your arms outstreched screaming 'I'm an aeroplane'..

Lawrence1895

Count the tiles in all the toilets

Temptamperu

Just go to the bar and try to pick up someone for bathroom sex.


If your ugly you can just imagine picking someone up and go for a fap.

hightower1

Ehh?.... do what your doing... go on the internet.

Jammy Donut

Go on the pull....
How much does an aeroplane weigh?

Enough to break the ice... Fancy a shag?

Cee-Jay-Cee

Sneak around the departures lounge ducking and hiding behind walls/pillars/chairs and talking into your sleeve at random times. Keep looking behind you and avoid open spaces, always stay close to the walls.

SouthTippBass

beks101 wrote: »

You sound like a right laugh.

Well I'm very sorry if that's not the answer you wanted. An airport is not really the type of place you should go dicking around causing trouble, for your own good just behave yourself until your flight arrives.

Lawrence1895

Temptamperu wrote: »

Just go to the bar and try to pick up someone for bathroom sex.


If your ugly you can just imagine picking someone up and go for a fap.

Or wear a balaclava and the proceed to No.1

Nothingbetter2d

beks101 wrote: »

Hello AHers,

So my flight from Toronto to Denver has been delayed two hours. Which leaves me with sh1tloads of excited energy and too much free time in an airport.

What should I do? Hit the bar and get buckled? Take a ride on the conveyor belts? Screw with the security guys? Befriend the angry-looking business dude beside me? Get myself arrested?

Let's hear it After Hours.

have a fap in the women's toilets

dilallio

If you have free wifi, why don't you watch some decent documentaries such as "Final Destination", or "Nat Geo. Aircrash Investigation"

hondasam

beks101 wrote: »

Hello AHers,

So my flight from Toronto to Denver has been delayed two hours. Which leaves me with sh1tloads of excited energy and too much free time in an airport.

What should I do? Hit the bar and get buckled? Take a ride on the conveyor belts? Screw with the security guys? Befriend the angry-looking business dude beside me? Get myself arrested?

Let's hear it After Hours.

Look for the first person who is wearing a blue dress and fantasise about having sex with them. You can't cheat, age does not matter, well over 18yrs.

davet82

hoax call about a bomb in the airport, fcuk it if you're gonna be late, why shouldnt everyone else :cool:

mikemac1

Shout bomb and prepare for your interview and body cavity search :eek:

They have the rubber gloves ready!

beks101

DrumSteve wrote: »

Read a book?

I've too much energy to sit and diligently read a book.

I just bought Some Canadian maple syrup and a bumper pack of smarties. I don't even like smarties.

aaronjumper

Sprint down the runway flapping your arms. Where we're going we don't need planes.

beks101

SouthTippBass wrote: »

Well I'm very sorry if that's not the answer you wanted. An airport is not really the type of place you should go dicking around causing trouble, for your own good just behave yourself until your flight arrives.

OK mom

problemchimp

Give the Mammy a ring for a chat!

Claasman

find some strangers and do this....

http://www.youtube.com/watch? v=j0oTx6jHnwg&feature=youtube_gdata_player

iwasonbwh

Start shouting 'Look theres my friend jack...HI JACK HI JACK' (or would that be better on the plane?)

davet82

problemchimp wrote: »

Give the Mammy a ring for a chat!

fcuk that, wheres that book then :pac:

Mr.Crinklewood

Plant seacrest and watch it grow.

Lawrence1895

davet82 wrote: »

hoax call about a bomb in the airport, fcuk it if you're gonna be late, why shouldnt everyone else :cool:

Don't go that far, just leave some luggage unattended :pac:

beks101

problemchimp wrote: »

Give the Mammy a ring for a chat!

I have already! And a Daddy chat. And a bf chat. And a load of gchat.

Right, an hour 20 mins to go. I'm gonna crack into these smarties.

aaronjumper

beks101 wrote: »

I have already! And a Daddy chat. And a bf chat. And a load of gchat.

Right, an hour 20 mins to go. I'm gonna crack into these smarties.

At the risk of sounding nosey/stalkerish, where you going?
Business or a holiday?

Only reply if the answer is a happy one.

beks101

aaronjumper wrote: »

beks101 wrote: »

At the risk of sounding nosey/stalkerish, where you going?
Business or a holiday?

Only reply if the answer is a happy one.

A wedding in Denver!

EI_Flyboy

Try on ALL the sunglasses you can find!

Mr.Crinklewood

beks101 wrote: »

I have already! And a Daddy chat. And a bf chat. And a load of gchat.

Right, an hour 20 mins to go. I'm gonna crack into these smarties.

If you ask them how to spend your time, they should have the answer.

Conall Cernach

Buy a teddybear and straw hat at duty free, put on the hat, go up to a random girl and ask her in a nervous voice if she'd carry the bear onto the flight for you for good luck. If you can manage to sweat profusely and put on a dodgy South American accent while doing this you get extra points.

aaronjumper

beks101 wrote: »

aaronjumper wrote: »

A wedding in Denver!

A nice one, that should be a laugh.
Plus even if you drink too much you can just go:
"Thisshh ish a normal amount to have where I come from"

Jammy Donut

Drop a suite case in the middle of the lounge and swiftly walk away.

Then when they get suspicious and surround the area, walk in pick it up and go 'Jasus that's where I left it'

Ellis Dee

If you bump into a guy called Larry Craig and he tells you he's a Republican politician, don't go to the toilet cubicle with him.:):):)

Reoil

Get so drunk that you aren't allowed on to your flight and end up propped up against the wall in urine-soaked clothes with boke over your top.

Great craic though... :rolleyes:

beks101

Conall Cernach wrote: »

Buy a teddybear and straw hat at duty free, put on the hat, go up to a random girl and ask her in a nervous voice if she'd carry the bear onto the flight for you for good luck. If you can manage to sweat profusely and put on a dodgy South American accent while doing this you get extra points.

Don't I sort of have to be a dude for this to have its full effect though? Plus with the fapping. Most girls can't fap at random

Thefirestarter

Go to the bookstore in the airport and read out aloud a huge spoiler of a well known series of books.

Jammy Donut

beks101 wrote: »

Conall Cernach wrote: »

Buy a teddybear and straw hat at duty free, put on the hat, go up to a random girl and ask her in a nervous voice if she'd carry the bear onto the flight for you for good luck. If you can manage to sweat profusely and put on a dodgy South American accent while doing this you get extra points.

Don't I sort of have to be a dude for this to have its full effect though? Plus with the fapping. Most girls can't fap at random

Ja wanna hand love?

Temptamperu

beks101 wrote: »

Don't I sort of have to be a dude for this to have its full effect though? Plus with the fapping. Most girls can't fap at random

Not with that attitude anyway :P

Nothingbetter2d

beks101 you a dude or girl?

if you a dude fap in the women's toilets if you a girl fap in the mens toilets up on the hand basins next to the urinals

beks101

Nothingbetter2d wrote: »

beks101 you a dude or girl?

I am a laydee

Jammy Donut

Nothingbetter2d wrote: »

beks101 you a dude or girl?

if you a dude fap in the women's toilets if you a girl fap in the mens toilets up on the hand basins next to the urinals

Worst chat-up line evvvvvvvvva.

clintondaly

Strategically place some Smarties on the walkway in front of you,have phone camera ready,record,upload to Youtube,place link below.

beks101

Update: I have eaten half the bag of smarties and am presumably fat now and high as a kite.

Guy beside me smells REALLY GOOD

Jammy Donut

beks101 wrote: »

Update: I have eaten half the bag of smarties and am presumably fat now and high as a kite.

Guy beside me smells REALLY GOOD

Roide Him and post video!