My mongrel humped the neighbours purebred!

Cee-Jay-Cee

I let my pure bred retarded but loveable mongrel out for a run last night and he took off like a hare up the field behind our house and into a neighbours garden.
I went up after him and found him in the back garden of their house in their pedigree collies enclosure humping the árse of the collie. The collie is a pure bred and used for breeding and shows and has won many awards/prizes.
The only way i could see that he got in was by climbing up on a pile of pallets at the rear of the pen. I went into the pen and dragged him away (he wasnt pleased!) and dragged him home by the collar.
My neighbours werent home and so i havent said anything to them and as far as i know no one seen me as there are no other houses around. I get on well with them and so dont know what to do, say nothing and risk the collie getting pregnant with our mutts pups or tell them so they can do something about it???

Sykk

CJC999 wrote: »

I let my pure bred retarded but loveable mongrel out for a run last night and he took off like a hare up the field behind our house and into a neighbours garden.
I went up after him and found him in the back garden of their house in their pedigree collies enclosure humping the árse of the collie. The collie is a pure bred and used for breeding and shows and has won many awards/prizes.
The only way i could see that he got in was by climbing up on a pile of pallets at the rear of the pen. I went into the pen and dragged him away (he wasnt pleased!) and dragged him home by the collar.
My neighbours werent home and so i havent said anything to them and as far as i know no one seen me as there are no other houses around. I get on well with them and so dont know what to do, say nothing and risk the collie getting pregnant with our mutts pups or tell them so they can do something about it???

I'm no dog expert but does this make zero sense?

Feeona

That read like Romeo and Juliet.

squod

CJC999 wrote: »

or tell them so they can do something about it???

Like what? Make you pay puppy maintenance for the next 16 years? Jump the wall with a shovel.

chin_grin

Feeona wrote: »

That read like Romeo and Juliet.

Without the iambic pentameter.

ft9

Kick to the belly should do the trick

steveLFC24

Haha that's funny

Cee-Jay-Cee

I mean he's pure mongrel, in that he's 100% mongrel with god knows how many mixes in him. Sorry for the confusion.

super_furry

Fair play. Your neighbours must be awful racists.

CardBordWindow

Were you watching The Lady and The Tramp last night?

DUBACC

CJC999 wrote: »

I let my pure bred retarded but loveable mongrel out for a run last night and he took off like a hare up the field behind our house and into a neighbours garden.
I went up after him and found him in the back garden of their house in their pedigree collies enclosure humping the árse of the collie. The collie is a pure bred and used for breeding and shows and has won many awards/prizes.
The only way i could see that he got in was by climbing up on a pile of pallets at the rear of the pen. I went into the pen and dragged him away (he wasnt pleased!) and dragged him home by the collar.
My neighbours werent home and so i havent said anything to them and as far as i know no one seen me as there are no other houses around. I get on well with them and so dont know what to do, say nothing and risk the collie getting pregnant with our mutts pups or tell them so they can do something about it???

Funniest thing I've read on here in a while.

FatherLen

well the collies are spoiled goods now. you have ruined their dog!

ha don't say a word

OP, it sounds like you like to participate in dogging!
Don't say anything IMO.

Cee-Jay-Cee

squod wrote: »

Like what? Make you pay puppy maintenance for the next 16 years? Jump the wall with a shovel.

Maybe a doggy abortion if it gets pregnant? I dunno, i'm asking if i should tell them!

PCPhoto

CJC999 wrote: »

I mean he's pure mongrel, in that he's 100% mongrel with no god knows how many mixes in him. Sorry for the confusion.

you mean a heinz 57 !!

EDIT: I'm sure the neighbours will discover their little pet has been upto "the nasty" with the neighbours dog in a few months.

it all depends on how you think they will take it ... if you tell they potentialy now see her as "stained" and may have only been using her to breed/sell puppies - I would suggest you stay quiet on it. (they will blame you for any off-spring and you could be left with a litter in a few months).

if you tell and they just brush it off ...these things happen kinda thing ...then ...go ahead tell them !

you just have to anticipate their reaction first !!

Personally I dont like the idea that dogs are bred for puppies only .... but if this is the kind of people they are - its more than likely you will get the blame for leaving your dog out without a lead !

MonkieSocks

Last Night :eek:

Quickly stuff the "Morning After" pill in a piece of meat and lob over the fence.

Should do the trick

Your probably as well to tell and tell them early so they can inject her to make sure no pups are on the way.

Tazium

CJC999 wrote: »

humping the árse of the collie.

Durty dogs, the pair of them. Clearly no chance of any off-spring(er-spaniels then.)

Claasman

get your dog snipped

Dyr

CJC999 wrote: »

I let my pure bred retarded but loveable mongrel out for a run last night and he took off like a hare up the field behind our house and into a neighbours garden.
I went up after him and found him in the back garden of their house in their pedigree collies enclosure humping the árse of the collie. The collie is a pure bred and used for breeding and shows and has won many awards/prizes.
The only way i could see that he got in was by climbing up on a pile of pallets at the rear of the pen. I went into the pen and dragged him away (he wasnt pleased!) and dragged him home by the collar.
My neighbours werent home and so i havent said anything to them and as far as i know no one seen me as there are no other houses around. I get on well with them and so dont know what to do, say nothing and risk the collie getting pregnant with our mutts pups or tell them so they can do something about it???

If your mutt could get into their back garden then he's not the only one who has, the collie has probably been ridden more than a tramore donkey at this stage

SeaFields

how would you like it if you were dragged home by the collar in the middle of the ride?! Poor form OP, poor form!

Cuddlesworth

Why the hell haven't you had him fixed? He will smell and chase a bitch in heat for miles.

smash

How do you know if he blew his load or not?

Diamond_Ninja

That made me laugh, reminds me of that episode of Married With Children where Buck went and gave the neighbours purebred dog one and killed her..

whistlingtitan

You should have the dog snipped

davet82

your dog should be placed on a sex offenders list imo

johnny_adidas

Good on him i say

CardBordWindow

Have you contacted Jeremy Kyle yet?

johngalway

Send them a bill for the stud fee, don't forget the call out charge either

Phoenix Park

Can it be proven your dog is the father if she's up the duff? He shouldn't have to take a DNA test...unless he wants to of course. If he wants to be involved then why should the bitches family stand in the way just because they're snobs. But if he doesn't want to be involved then some form of maintenace is appropriate. Thats between you and your dog though, which one of you sorts that out.

OldNotWIse

CJC999 wrote: »

I let my pure bred retarded but loveable mongrel out for a run last night and he took off like a hare up the field behind our house and into a neighbours garden.
I went up after him and found him in the back garden of their house in their pedigree collies enclosure humping the árse of the collie. The collie is a pure bred and used for breeding and shows and has won many awards/prizes.
The only way i could see that he got in was by climbing up on a pile of pallets at the rear of the pen. I went into the pen and dragged him away (he wasnt pleased!) and dragged him home by the collar.
My neighbours werent home and so i havent said anything to them and as far as i know no one seen me as there are no other houses around. I get on well with them and so dont know what to do, say nothing and risk the collie getting pregnant with our mutts pups or tell them so they can do something about it???

First off your dog is not a mongrel, he's a "multipedigree" (As I like to call my little adorable furry scumbag )

On a serious note, tell your neighbour. There are "morning after" (I kid you not) injections that the dog can get to prevent the pregnancy (here's hoping I dont start a pro-life/pro-choice debate at a canine level lol). The injections have to be given at very specific times after the er..fun, and also quite quickly so better to tell your neighbour. Better than bringing up to ten unwanted puppies into the world that will be really difficult to find homes for or...depending on what kind of person your neighbour is maybe he will try to do away with them or dump them (I dont know him I'm just looking at the possibility)

Hope it all goes well

Pandora2

smash wrote: »

How do you know if he blew his load or not?

Ah c'mon Smash...the dog's in the street know that it is possible to get pregnant without 'full' ejaculation....;)


I'll get me coat:o

hightower1

Pics or GTFO

Cee-Jay-Cee

PCPhoto wrote: »

you mean a heinz 57 !!

EDIT: I'm sure the neighbours will discover their little pet has been upto "the nasty" with the neighbours dog in a few months.

it all depends on how you think they will take it ... if you tell they potentialy now see her as "stained" and may have only been using her to breed/sell puppies - I would suggest you stay quiet on it. (they will blame you for any off-spring and you could be left with a litter in a few months).

if you tell and they just brush it off ...these things happen kinda thing ...then ...go ahead tell them !

you just have to anticipate their reaction first !!

Personally I dont like the idea that dogs are bred for puppies only .... but if this is the kind of people they are - its more than likely you will get the blame for leaving your dog out without a lead !

They only have the one dog so its not like theyre in it commercially but they have sold previous pups from this dog and they were IKC registered as we used to get people accidentally calling to our house looking to buy pups (and when they seen my mess of a mongrel dog dragging it ass around the garden and whining they figured out fairly quickly that they were at the wrong house)

ScumLord

CJC999 wrote: »

I went up after him and found him in the back garden of their house in their pedigree collies enclosure humping the árse of the collie. The collie is a pure bred and used for breeding and shows and has won many awards/prizes.

That dog is probably incredibly inbreed so. Tell your neighbours their horrible sick people for forcing disease and suffering on their animals by encouraging terrible breeding techniques. They should be thanking you for giving their dog a shot of healthy genes so maybe the next generation won't have to suffer through the side effects of disgustingly shallow gene pools..

mauzo

Humping the arse off her....

Wait....you can get pregnant from that?

No but seriously I'd tell them, what's the worst that can happen.....

davet82

syndeyfife wrote: »

No but seriously I'd tell them, what's the worst that can happen.....

maintenance payments, pups on weekends, a kick in the bollix from his neighbour

Son Of A Vidic

Fúck me, yesterday we had a donkey that raped an ass, today we have........

CJC999 wrote: »

My mongrel humped the neighbours purebred!

What next?


The donkey and mongrel that want to get married?

frozenfrozen

Get your dog snipped now, then when there are pups say it's not yours because look sure he doesn't have the means to the product!

bbam

Anonymous note in the door.
That way they know and can act if they wish and you won't be stuck with row for a vets bill for a few hundred €'s

You let the dog loose so I'd see you as being liable for any costs. I also heard some rubbish about high pedigree dogs being ruined for breeding after having mongrel pups, can't see how though!

Chorcai

If you managed bring the dog away, then he didn,t "lock" or "tie" with the bítch.

quick google...

The actual act of breeding can take anywhere from ten to forty-five minutes. This is because a male dog's physiology is not the same as that of a man. Dogs do not ejaculate; they seep through an engorged penis. The female's vagina causes a tight ring around the penis and any attempt to stop the breeding at this point can damage both animals.

Once the male has entered, he will slowly move so that both front paws are on the same side of the female. One hind leg will come up and over the back of the female and they will be standing tail to tail. This is considered the tie.

Eventually, the penis will shrink back to its normal size, the tie is broken and both dogs will walk away. When this occurs, once again separate the two dogs. For optimal breeding results, repeat the process every other day until the female will no longer accept the male.

http://www.essortment.com/guide-breeding-dog-22971.html

yellowlabrador

bbam wrote: »

Anonymous note in the door.
That way they know and can act if they wish and you won't be stuck with row for a vets bill for a few hundred €'s

You let the dog loose so I'd see you as being liable for any costs. I also heard some rubbish about high pedigree dogs being ruined for breeding after having mongrel pups, can't see how though!

aybe cos the bitch ends up liking a bit of ruff

mauzo

Chorcai wrote: »

If you managed bring the dog away, then he didn,t "lock" or "tie" with the bítch.

quick google...

The actual act of breeding can take anywhere from ten to forty-five minutes. This is because a male dog's physiology is not the same as that of a man. Dogs do not ejaculate; they seep through an engorged penis. The female's vagina causes a tight ring around the penis and any attempt to stop the breeding at this point can damage both animals.

Once the male has entered, he will slowly move so that both front paws are on the same side of the female. One hind leg will come up and over the back of the female and they will be standing tail to tail. This is considered the tie.

Eventually, the penis will shrink back to its normal size, the tie is broken and both dogs will walk away. When this occurs, once again separate the two dogs. For optimal breeding results, repeat the process every other day until the female will no longer accept the male.

http://www.essortment.com/guide-breeding-dog-22971.html

YOu should go into doggie erotic novels

Ellis Dee

It sound to me like your mutt is smarter than you are. He knows he didn't get it for stirring his tea.

Good on him!:) The purebred bitch probably enjoyed a bit of rough every bit as much as the toffish Young Tory women I rode when I lived in England years ago.;);)

(Pat on head) Attaboy! :rolleyes::rolleyes:

bellylint

Bambi wrote: »

If your mutt could get into their back garden then he's not the only one who has, the collie has probably been ridden more than a tramore donkey at this stage

I really hope you mean a donkey that provides a transport service as opposed to anything else.

ejmaztec

There were repercussions when our mongrel hound escaped one evening and ravished some bitch's thoroughbred bitch along the road. The woman knew it was our dog that did the dirty and rang us up when the pups arrived, to tell us that it cost her €200 in vet bills. I told her that she should have got her dog a chastity belt, a suggestion that she didn't appreciate. She then contacted the dog-warden to tell him that our dog was attacking people (which the soft-headed mutt never ever did.)

The warden came round to investigate, but couldn't do anything but give us a bollocking for the dog being off the property.

castletownman

Ah dogs. Gotta love them.

A couple of weeks ago I witnessed my stupid Jack Russell attack and kill his first rabbit in years.

And I never felt prouder of him!

swimming in a sea

put her on the boat to england

OldNotWIse

Chorcai wrote: »

If you managed bring the dog away, then he didn,t "lock" or "tie" with the bítch.

quick google...

The actual act of breeding can take anywhere from ten to forty-five minutes. This is because a male dog's physiology is not the same as that of a man. Dogs do not ejaculate; they seep through an engorged penis. The female's vagina causes a tight ring around the penis and any attempt to stop the breeding at this point can damage both animals.

Once the male has entered, he will slowly move so that both front paws are on the same side of the female. One hind leg will come up and over the back of the female and they will be standing tail to tail. This is considered the tie.

Eventually, the penis will shrink back to its normal size, the tie is broken and both dogs will walk away. When this occurs, once again separate the two dogs. For optimal breeding results, repeat the process every other day until the female will no longer accept the male.

http://www.essortment.com/guide-breeding-dog-22971.html

And there was me thinking I knew it all at the grand ol' age of 28 :rolleyes:

mauzo

castletownman wrote: »

Ah dogs. Gotta love them.

A couple of weeks ago I witnessed my stupid Jack Russell attack and kill his first rabbit in years.

And I never felt prouder of him!

Well getting a rabbit for a dog was just stupid.

the_syco

CJC999 wrote: »

The only way i could see that he got in was by climbing up on a pile of pallets at the rear of the pen.

Notify your neighbour of this, saying you've seena few dogs get in that way. I'm thinking this has probably happened before.