Shame at the end of a bottle...

PizzamanIRL

Andy!! wrote: »

It's spelt 'allowed' dear.

Muppet.

Hardonraging

shopaholic01 wrote: »

But I can't relax until he resumes his search for a woman to suck whiskey off his erect penis . I know everything is ok then.

OMFG !!! I know what i'll be asking chicks to do in wales this weekend

username_x

been arrested for my own safety before. Apparently spiderman isn't real and trying to climb the spire will never work out in your favour.

shopaholic01

Hardonraging wrote: »

OMFG !!! I know what i'll be asking chicks to do in wales this weekend

I have tried to convince Deus that whiskey isn't the best choice of drink, but he's having none of it.

I recommend you try a more 'girly' drink. It works 2 out of 3 times. FACT;)

Hardonraging

shopaholic01 wrote: »

I have tried to convince Deus that whiskey isn't the best choice of drink, but he's having none of it.

I recommend you try a more 'girly' drink. It works 2 out of 3 times. FACT

This is why i like you

boredatwork82

Deus Ex Machina wrote: »

I used invariably have a few whiskies before meeting my friends, which obviously evolved to a few more whiskies, the more and more. Now I just down an entire bottle and turn up incomprehensible, screaming, shouting and crying. It is very much like a physical and emotional assault: one minute I'll be telling them secrets about myself and others so deep and private that they change the way they think about me completely. Often they sense a vibe of what I'm saying before I get it out and they'll start telling me to stop and shut up but I force them to listen and become violent. These are the kind of secrets I would never tell anybody sober.

Next I am violent, abusive and sexually charged. I have gone after my best friends' girlfriends, trying any tactic to get them, including denigrating my friend and making up stories to go with the truth. I have broken up many relationships of (mostly former) friends doing this.


My thirst for alcohol becomes insatiable soon and I steal any drink I can get my hands on. I'm usually alone soon after, and I trawl the streets looking for drink and people. I often engage in public sex acts with street dwellers at this stage, and have both been arrested and been seen by people who know me. I have destroyed public and private property and hurt people along the way. No wonder people call me an alcoholic psychopath!

Are you my friend Darren?

Heroditas

syndeyfife wrote: »

I just wish I could erase all their memories! :mad:

Some drink should help that.

Jaxxy

Ah yeah most people who have had a few sessions have been there, OP. The worst for me are those random memory flashbacks I get of doing something mortifying while drunk, something that could have happened YEARS ago. I could be sitting at my desk in work, or in the loo, or I could be in bed, just about to fall asleep and a memory will just pop into my head. And I'll go puce with embarrassment, even though I'm all alone and the only person remembering it.

The right before you fall asleep one is the worst, it must be like the mortifying memory witching hour or something. **** you, brain!

kfallon

mikemac1 wrote: »

There was a time fadó fadó when taxis were next to impossible to get on busy nights
You young uns would not remember
Bad times, I'm reminded of those days when I hear taxi drivers moaning about no work and too much competition


Torrential rain and I had a 7km walk home or queue for a taxi for ages

Decided I'd go to the office and sleep at my desk, seemed a reasonable idea at the time, was just up the road.
Security guard kicked me out


A few months later someone else did the same and was discovered asleep at their desk in the morning
Got fired
Very harsh imo, I don't think it's a firing offense

Were you working in the IFSC at the time?

kfallon

Jaxxy wrote: »

Ah yeah most people who have had a few sessions have been there, OP. The worst for me are those random memory flashbacks I get of doing something mortifying while drunk, something that could have happened YEARS ago. I could be sitting at my desk in work, or in the loo, or I could be in bed, just about to fall asleep and a memory will just pop into my head. And I'll go puce with embarrassment, even though I'm all alone and the only person remembering it.

The right before you fall asleep one is the worst, it must be like the mortifying memory witching hour or something. **** you, brain!

Please stop it, you are dragging up the mortifying memories for me!!

Sunday night after a heavy weekend is the worst for it, all the old memories come back

Deus Ex Machina

boredatwork82 wrote: »

Are you my friend Darren?

Is he an alcoholic psychopath?

Nothingbetter2d

shopaholic01 wrote: »

I have tried to convince Deus that whiskey isn't the best choice of drink, but he's having none of it.

I recommend you try a more 'girly' drink. It works 2 out of 3 times. FACT;)

Hardonraging wrote: »

This is why i like you

suddy n red

HowAreWe

Ahh jesus..... this one just wont go away...

Back when I was 17 , all my friends were 18 except one other.
went to a pub, both of us got rejected. We went down an alleyway for a piss as you do, as we were pretty ****ed after pre-drinking (classy I know).
Anyway, there was a bucket down this alleyway. We thought it would be a great idea to piss in it, so we did and we went back with this bucket and you can guess what happened.

I feel terrible to this day. Its not even a funny story, it's one of those ''why the **** would you do that?'' ones.

Manc-Red

I've had numerous of embarrassing drunken episodes, but my most recent is where I got so pi*sed at the first Irish game in this year's Euros out my Mother's back garden - that I jumped from the top of the stairs to around the middle point where my mother's boyfriend was after using the jacks......

We both woke up about 5 mins later with about 3 friends trying to get us up from the floor tiles.....

Very dangerous thing to do I know.

Mr Benevolent

And this thread demonstrates why alcohol should be controlled and cannabis legalised. Far fewer social problems from cannabis.

bogmanfan

Depends on whether you consider white guys with dreadlocks a social problem

Confab wrote: »

And this thread demonstrates why alcohol should be controlled and cannabis legalised. Far fewer social problems from cannabis.

Mr Benevolent

bogmanfan wrote: »

Depends on whether you consider white guys with dreadlocks a social problem

I consider extremely drunk people a far greater social problem. And yes, I drink and have done to excess.

Manc-Red

Confab wrote: »

I consider extremely drunk people a far greater social problem. And yes, I drink and have done to excess.

I think Bill Hicks nailed it with this one ....

“I have never seen two people on pot get in a fight because it is ****ing IMPOSSIBLE. "Hey, buddy!" "Hey, what?" "Ummmmmmm...." End of argument.”

To much Alcohol.... Well, we all know what can happen.

Deus Ex Machina

Confab wrote: »

I consider extremely drunk people a far greater social problem.

Disagree. Extreme intoxication is not much different than psychosis. A troop of heavily intoxicated people on the street is no more dangerous than a gang of psychotics, the only difference is the former's state of mind is bought and paid for, thus helping the economy. Drink is a huge part of the Irish economy.

AnonoBoy

HowAreWe wrote: »

We thought it would be a great idea to piss in it, so we did and we went back with this bucket and you can guess what happened.

You drank it?

tmc86

Holiday off to the wrong start....

January 2011 18 of us went on a ski trip to France to a resort we knew well. Flew from Dublin to Standsted early morning met all the lads in the Radisson hotel there while we waited for our flight that evening to France. All the girls did the sensible thing and went shopping.

We started on pints in the hotel then went through security and each picked up a bottle of captain morgan in duty free to crack into on the plane. Flight was quiet bar our group who had managed to get our own section in the middle of the plane. The Ryanair girls were having a bit of a laugh with us and we continued drinking.

Arrive at small french airport with an hour wait for coach to collect us to take us to the resort. More drinking at the airport. All manage to pile onto the bus all very rowdy at this point carried on drinking during 2 hour trip to the resort.

Remember arriving at the resort next flashback was about 3 hours later wandering around said resort looking for our apartment. Out of my mind tried to find the girl's apartment no idea where it was. Phone was working but no credit so no one could call me. Ended up sleeping in the stairwell of an apartment block waking up at 7am with a black eye and still no idea where everyone was. Then decided to collect my pre booked skis and ticket pass then met the girls at the ticket office and they were then kind enough to show me where I was staying.

In-between my blackout I had gone back to the apartment with everyone and stood in the living room. When my friend asked what I was doing I replied, "Making sure I know what the apartment looks like so I can get back here". We all went to the pub (no recollection) and whilst standing there my friend asked me "you got your bag with my ski pants in didnt you?" I replied "you talkin crazy" a couple of times then it must of hit me that I didn't take my bag off of the bus. I had my hand luggae but not my big checked in bag with a weeks worth of ski stuff and clothes. Aparently I then legged it out of the pub with my pint to find it which is where I obviously spent the next 3 hours or so.

No sign of my bag for the week until despite ringing all bus companies, tourist offices and lost property -we had were getting our return flight and a driver came in with it on his bus at the airport.

Never been so hungover, mortified, depressed in my life!

IrishAm

Deus Ex Machina wrote: »

Drunk now obviously.

Really, man?

Anything I can do to help. And I mean that.

I am in Dublin,

HowAreWe

AnonoBoy wrote: »

You drank it?

I wish.

AnonoBoy

IrishAm wrote: »

Really, man?

Anything I can do to help. And I mean that.

I am in Dublin, my number is....

Yup. That's smart to give out your phone number in After Hours. :rolleyes:

Micky Dolenz

IrishAm wrote: »

Really, man?

Anything I can do to help. And I mean that.

I am in Dublin,

Mod

Don't post your mobile number on the web. By all means send it by PM though.

kfallon

Manc-Red wrote: »

I've had numerous of embarrassing drunken episodes, but my most recent is where I got so pi*sed at the first Irish game in this year's Euros out my Mother's back garden - that I jumped from the top of the stairs to around the middle point where my mother's boyfriend was after using the jacks......

We both woke up about 5 mins later with about 3 friends trying to get us up from the floor tiles.....

Very dangerous thing to do I know.

You mother's b/f had a slash/dump on the middle of the stairs? :eek:

IrishAm

Micky Dolenz wrote: »

Mod

Don't post your mobile number on the web. By all means send it by PM though.

Of course, apologies.

bellylint

Andy!! wrote: »

It's spelt 'allowed' dear.

when I see I grammar nazi, I tell them it will all be ok, and try to console them with "There, their, they're"

IrishAm

AnonoBoy wrote: »

Yup. That's smart to give out your phone number in After Hours. :rolleyes:

It is not. My heart over ruled the head.

Ive been there. I know what it is like.

I went off on one last week. Ruined a marriage.

I am an alcoholic. A young one, too. Common, in Ireland.

damagegt

Went out few weeks back with my sisters mate.I had been drinking all day and by lunch time I had hounded my way through 15 pints before I had met up with her.That evening I some how convinced her that heading out with me would be a good idea and I had loads of money to pay for everything .

Turns out I had no money what so ever so she paid for everything and at some stage during the night I had convinced someone to give us a go of their bike,I then got the girl to sit on the crossbar and cycled off, made it about 20ft down the road before I crashed into a pole.

I jumped up not a mark on me but she wasn't so lucky as blood began to trickle down her face.She paniced a little before I calmed the situation and brought her to a doctor.Along the way her feet started to get sore from the shoes she was wearing so I gave her a piggy back needless to say I made it about 20ft before dropping her once more on her head.

My time to split I though and legged it off .NICE

I woke up in my garden covered in puke with the world of abuse on my phone.
I have not heard from that particular young lady since.

HowAreWe

^^^^


Oh you've made me feel so much better about myself.

castletownman

I'm grand when on the beer in my home town in Wexford. Some people might even say I'm sensible. But a whole different animal is released from me when I go on a session in Dublin. My latest escapades up there are a prime example.

It was my friend's birthday recently and we decided to head to Dublin and fit in a promotional night in Coppers at the same time. The function started at 7 by which time we had a crate of heineken in us as well as bit of vodka. I remember the function well, it was a preview of the upcoming All-Ireland hurling championship with such hurlers as Dan Shanahan and Michael Duignan in attendance. Afterwards though, jaysus!

My last memories of the rest of the night involve me walking from Coppers to Clonskeagh, scaling a fence in UCD and hanging around waiting for my friend to return home so I could stay in his apartment. In the apartment then I was convinced that his male flatmate was coming on to me (he was offering me to stay in his room) so I decided to sleep in the car instead. Anyway, woke up in my car at 6 in the morning and decided it was time I went home, so rather insanely drove back to Wexford in a blur! Maddest thing I ever done in my entire life

So long story short, if you want to go on a session with me, make sure it isn't in Dublin, because I'm liable to do anything.

MultiUmm

I feel like such an orderly drunk after reading this thread.

I once asked my best friend and another friend of mine to have a 3 way shift with someone who I was already after shifting. When one turned it down I asked my best friend, I was encouraging them because according to drunk me 3 way shifts are great fun ... didn't remember that one till they told me about it the morning after. :P

Puked in my friends bed after our 18th. To be fair I got it into the bowl. Me being the courteous drunk I am, I got up and I emptied it into the toilet and cleaned the bowl/ toilet with Cillit Bang I found in the bathroom. :pac:

At my neighbours 60th said to my friend in an accusatory manner out of the blue "I can!" he asked "you can what?" I went on to say "I can do the splits!", attempted to do the splits and faceplanted onto the ground nose first. Had to be held up by my friend and his mam (one at each arm) on the way out the door that night incidentally ...

Always come on to the same person when I'm drunk enough and if they're there ... That's probably more embarrassing then anything else I've done, mainly when I see them when they're sober. :rolleyes:

Feel a bit less orderly now tbh ...

Nothingbetter2d

AnonoBoy wrote: »

Yup. That's smart to give out your phone number in After Hours. :rolleyes:

sure ya can have my number


its 555 4545 gotta love hollywood for its unoriginal phone numbers

Diamond_Ninja

Last Saturday I was challenged by my friend to drink a bottle of wine in under a minute, which I very nearly did (baaaaad idea, never again). Later on in the nightclub I left my bag in the bathroom by mistake and could not for the life of me remember doing it so I proceeded to burst into tears, proper heaving crying, because I had lost my bag. 5 minutes later my friend turns up with it.. Mortified isn't even the word :o:o

Reckon we've all been there at some point OP

Nothingbetter2d

Micky Dolenz wrote: »

Mod

Don't post your mobile number on the web. By all means send it by PM though.

must get phone number from cached file..... must telemarket phone number.... must sell double glazed windows, penis enhancer tablets and tell him he has a virus on his pc....... no must resist must resist!!!!! ;);)

Diamond_Ninja

MultiUmm wrote: »

I once asked my best friend and another friend of mine to have a 3 way shift with someone who I was already after shifting.

Oh God the 3 way shift :eek::eek: Just remembered that one from a while ago too!

MultiUmm

Diamond_Ninja wrote: »

Oh God the 3 way shift :eek::eek: Just remembered that one from a while ago too!

I actually did do it when I was drunk once, hence me telling my friends about how great it is. :rolleyes: A lot more embarrassing when asking your closest friend and another fairly good friend to do it with you, took me a while to get over that one. :eek:

Manc-Red

kfallon wrote: »

You mother's b/f had a slash/dump on the middle of the stairs? :eek:

He did when I jumped on his back hahahaha!!

Diamond_Ninja

MultiUmm wrote: »

I actually did do it when I was drunk once, hence me telling my friends about how great it is. :rolleyes: A lot more embarrassing when asking your closest friend and another fairly good friend to do it with you, took me a while to get over that one. :eek:

Oh stop I've done the exact same thing, the shame of it all Ah sure, I suppose it's only acceptable when you're young!

Deus Ex Machina

Jaxxy wrote: »

Ah yeah most people who have had a few sessions have been there, OP. The worst for me are those random memory flashbacks I get of doing something mortifying while drunk, something that could have happened YEARS ago. I could be sitting at my desk in work, or in the loo, or I could be in bed, just about to fall asleep and a memory will just pop into my head. And I'll go puce with embarrassment, even though I'm all alone and the only person remembering it.

The right before you fall asleep one is the worst, it must be like the mortifying memory witching hour or something. **** you, brain!

You think that's bad? Try getting tapped on the shoulder by a stranger on the Dart telling you that the saw you receiving oral sex from a naked junkey down a lane off O'Connell street at 12 in the day the previous Thursday, and that they intend to report you to the police if they see you again.

sarabroderick

Was made redundant a few years back and we all got a few quid. We finished on a Friday and went for pints at lunch. Got home the following Monday night. Myself and one of the other girls booked a hotel room in town and six of us essentially holed up in there for the weekend. It was like ancient Rome. None of us can look each other in the eye since.

Manc-Red

sarabroderick wrote: »

It was like ancient Rome. None of us can look each other in the eye since.

Yeah????:D:D:D

Care to tell us more???

I am pie

Deus Ex Machina wrote: »

You think that's bad? Try getting tapped on the shoulder by a stranger on the Dart telling you that the saw you receiving oral sex from a naked junkey down a lane off O'Connell street at 12 in the day the previous Thursday, and that they intend to report you to the police if they see you again.

Shenanigans. This never happened though did it, and you're not really in the middle of some desparate bender either.

Just write the book and be done with it "Thing's I've (not) Done Whilst Drunk"

Come on..."excuse me sir, I have to inform you that I saw you having your knob nibbled by some awful dreg of society and if I should witness this horrid event again I shall be informing the police"

Yep. No holes in that story.

herosa

bellylint wrote: »

when I see I grammar nazi, I tell them it will all be ok, and try to console them with "There, their, they're"

:):)

Dont know why Im laughing though. I am one.

sarabroderick

Yeah????

Care to tell us more???

Not really There were two blokes there who essentially thought they died and went to heaven. The twist in the tail is two of our little group subsequently got married which to me is kinda strange.

I have learned to drink more sensibly since I am happy to report.

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy

sarabroderick wrote: »

Was made redundant a few years back and we all got a few quid. We finished on a Friday and went for pints at lunch. Got home the following Monday night. Myself and one of the other girls booked a hotel room in town and six of us essentially holed up in there for the weekend. It was like ancient Rome. None of us can look each other in the eye since.

PM sent

Jaxxy

sarabroderick wrote: »

Was made redundant a few years back and we all got a few quid. We finished on a Friday and went for pints at lunch. Got home the following Monday night. Myself and one of the other girls booked a hotel room in town and six of us essentially holed up in there for the weekend. It was like ancient Rome. None of us can look each other in the eye since.

Everyone should have a weekend like that just once.

Diamond_Ninja

sarabroderick wrote: »

Was made redundant a few years back and we all got a few quid. We finished on a Friday and went for pints at lunch. Got home the following Monday night. Myself and one of the other girls booked a hotel room in town and six of us essentially holed up in there for the weekend. It was like ancient Rome. None of us can look each other in the eye since.

We did that for a friends birthday last year in Wexford, two double beds, 4 girls 3 guys. Didn't make for comfortable sleeping, not that we were sober enough to notice

Glimmerdog

Deus Ex Machina wrote: »

You think that's bad? Try getting tapped on the shoulder by a stranger on the Dart telling you that the saw you receiving oral sex from a naked junkey down a lane off O'Connell street at 12 in the day the previous Thursday, and that they intend to report you to the police if they see you again.

Legend