Pregnant and not sure I want it

Ginger1

Im lookin for some advice I recently found out I was pregnant but have also recently broke up with my partner we already have one child together who is 2 and a half . My ex is happy to have the baby but I'm not I want to go back to college and study nursing and feel a new baby is going to mess up my new life plan .i just can't make myself happy about this pregnancy. I no my ex says he wants the child and that he will be there but I can't help feeling that I'll be the one stuck with 2 children while he comes in and out of our lives playing happy families as he pleases. I also recently found out my ex is takin drugs it's the reason we broke up and i can't help but feel he's not really the type of dad u want for a new baby don't get me wrong he loves our other child but he's not the type of role model any good mother wants. I booked an abortion for 2 weeks time but don't no if I can go through with it ... I have taught about adoption but my ex says that's out of the question he would take the child if I was going to give it up for adoption .... I'm so lost on what's best for me and whats best for the child my family support my decision no matter what it is but I no deep down they want me to keep the child ... Any advice ??

eyescreamcone

Ginger1 wrote: »

Im lookin for some advice I recently found out I was pregnant but have also recently broke up with my partner we already have one child together who is 2 and a half . My ex is happy to have the baby but I'm not I want to go back to college and study nursing and feel a new baby is going to mess up my new life plan .i just can't make myself happy about this pregnancy. I no my ex says he wants the child and that he will be there but I can't help feeling that I'll be the one stuck with 2 children while he comes in and out of our lives playing happy families as he pleases. I also recently found out my ex is takin drugs it's the reason we broke up and i can't help but feel he's not really the type of dad u want for a new baby don't get me wrong he loves our other child but he's not the type of role model any good mother wants. I booked an abortion for 2 weeks time but don't no if I can go through with it ... I have taught about adoption but my ex says that's out of the question he would take the child if I was going to give it up for adoption .... I'm so lost on what's best for me and whats best for the child my family support my decision no matter what it is but I no deep down they want me to keep the child ... Any advice ??

My advice is not to listen to anonymous posters here. (except me that is).

Get professional advice.
Talk to your GP first and ask him/her to refer you to a pregnancy counsellor.

MrTsSnickers

God, what a difficult decision. I would suggest going to cura or somewhere similar to talk it through. Then again, Cura (I think) has a religious ethos so they may not be impartial. Perhaps http://www.positiveoptions.ie/ may be a better route to take.

It's such a hard decision, it may be useful to you to talk to someone who isn't connected with the situation. Whatever you decide is going to be a tough route either way, but whatever you do decide talk to someone. Don't let anyone else tell you what to do, it's polite to listen to their point of view but ultimately it's your decision.

As you say, you have plans, there may be other routes to study if you decide to continue with the pregnancy.

Either way, good luck and I hope that everything works out well for you.

Neyite

Its not an easy decision to make, and with an unreliable father on the scene, you are being realistic that while he says he will be supportive, you will still be doing the lions share of the work. In addition, the drugs are a worry, how responsible can he be if he is looking after what is essentially two babies if he is a habitual user- it makes sense that this factors very much into your decision making.

I would second talking to Positive Options as soon as possible - not just about the termination/adoption/keeping decision you are deciding, but they can give you information in other ways, such as support for you whichever decision you make.

Molly1

I would advise again Cura as they are a Catholic organisation and they basically try and council you out of an abortion. The Wellwoman Centre is the best place for recommending Councillors as they can recommond someone that is open, honest and more importantly unbiased.
Good luck with your decision.

iguana

Definitely talk to an impartial professional, they will let you talk things and go over things with you to help you reach the best decision for you. If you aren't able to go meet someone you can also try the IFPA Crisis Pregnancy Helpline; Lo Call 1850 49 50 51.

Max Power1

Molly1 wrote: »

I would advise against Cura as they are a Catholic organisation and they basically try and council you out of an abortion. The Wellwoman Centre is the best place for recommending Councillors as they can recommond someone that is open, honest and more importantly unbiased.
Good luck with your decision.

two letters - changes entirely the meaning (of which I think you meant) in your post.

Cura are like the scientologists - brainwash you until you agree with them!