Interview fcuk ups

misterdeeds

Had an interview recently so did all the research etc , so I go to the interview and it turns out it was a totally different company than I had done the research on, but knew the interviewer because she was a manager of one of the companies I used to work for (large multi national company) so I was delighted we kinda knew each other
Turned out to be more of a chat than an interview and I got the job there and then I start in 3 weeks time .

Topper Harley

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Po8NVV9FLNU

OT, but my interview stories are kind of mundane. Carry on...

Gloomtastic!

Back on topic.....

Was doing really well at an interview a few years ago until I called the owner of the company, who was there, a 'media whore'. It just came out and I thought I did a pretty good job of covering it but never heard from them again.
I've been self-employed ever since....

wilkie2006

Gloomtastic! wrote: »

Back on topic.....

Was doing really well at an interview a few years ago until I called the owner of the company, who was there, a 'media whore'. It just came out and I thought I did a pretty good job of covering it but never heard from them again.
I've been self-employed ever since....

Now that's a good story!

Caliden

1ZRed wrote: »

How kids like this fall on their ass onto a pile of money I'll never know:rolleyes:

To be fair it took a second to understand that the interviewer was asking if the word 'Bieber' meant basketball in German.
He didn't repeat the question in full after the first time of asking.

bbam

Years ago I was all ready for an interview. Grabbed the letter on the way out the door and noticed the interviews were the day before

Rang up and explained what happened and have the the old " I'm the best person for the job, you just have to meet me" line.

The brought me in on the second round of interviews and ingot the job.

cocoshovel

Anyway. Ive never had a job interview, just an interview for a fetac IT course.

"What operating system do you use".


errrr.....vista.

admiralofthefleet

cheesefiend wrote: »

About two seconds after I left an interview I realised that the buttons on the dress I was wearing had popped open exposing my boobs.

Needless to say, I got the job.

you obviously have excellent 'qualifications'

Gary ITR

I got a buddy of mine an interview with a company I worked for a few years back, it's a large food/bakery/deli food company. My buddy is a rather large chap but always quick witted, when asked during the interview was he passionate about food he replied with 'Are you blind or something?'

My boss rang me after the interview and told me he wouldn't be getting the job

FizzleSticks

This post has been deleted.

christmas2012

haha, my worst one was the employer for a company i was being interviewed for( a job i wasnt fussed on,but i still gave it my all),said well what do you think you could do to improve our company blah blah blah,and i replied,can i take a look around and see?i mean ffs what was i thinking,being honest i was a bit thrown off by the question,as i didnt want to answer in a way that i would be critisising the way they do things,its a bit of a tightrope..anyway much hasnt improved with interview nerves and wavering confidence,questions like that will throw you off every now and again..

Carter P Fly

Many many moons ago I was staying at my sisters place and her BF who had never had a steady job had an interview. He was a metal head with long hair and ripped jeans. I have no idea what teh interview was for but when he came back I asked him how it went and he said the interviewer was acting weird.

And then I saw it, or should I say them, Dangling in plain view between the rips in his Jeans...

True story.

questionmark?

One of my first interviews after finishing college was in a hotel (no idea why I applied never wanted to work in that area)

Went in all prepared, even polished the auld shoes. Left waiting for ages then the manager came down and said follow me, didnt even accept my offer of a handshake, went into his ****y office where he had the keys to his BMW in the middle of the table for some reason, then the duty manager came in he shouted at him and snapped his fingers, half way through the interview he answered his phone ffs Pissed off was an under statement. At the end he asked was there anything I wanted to know I just said ya how do I apply for a refund for the petrol I spent getting here and walked out. Prick.

*I did not go on to trip-adviser and write a ****load of bad reviews

brokenhinge

Not an interview per se, but the other week I had a first date and big job interview the same week.

On the date he asked me what I did in my spare time, I launched into a spiel about spending time with friends, volunteering and training myself to further my career before I realised I'd gone into my interview practised answers. Eep.

themandan6611

cheesefiend wrote: »

About two seconds after I left an interview I realised that the buttons on the dress I was wearing had popped open exposing my boobs.

Needless to say, I got the job.

did the same, but it was my zip and my huge mickey

wilkie2006

cheesefiend wrote: »

About two seconds after I left an interview I realised that the buttons on the dress I was wearing had popped open exposing my boobs.

Needless to say, I got the job.

themandan6611 wrote: »

did the same, but it was my zip and my huge mickey

If I was the interviewer - for some weird reason - I think I'd probably have very different reactions to both of these happenings. Opposite reactions, even. Strange that.

Dave!

Nothin terribly funny, but had an interview for some developer gig in a big insurance company or something. It was nice and pleasant enough, well structured interview, and the manager was very understanding. I did well on the general stuff, talking about my CV, etc., but then they had to go and ask me a bunch of specific Java-related questions... Who knew you had to actually be good at programming to get a developer job! I hadn't done Java since college anyway. The feedback was good on everything bar the technical stuff.

Had another one with an American software development company. They grilled me pretty good on college projects I had done 2 years ago and barely remember anything about. I did okay on that I felt. But then, being an American, he threw in an oul brainteaser/problem thing, and told me to work through it. I've never been good at those bastardin' things, so I struggled with it for an excruciating amount of time. He tried to help me through it and spelled it out for me... I just nodded and smiled, "ahh yes, of course", and then as he asked me to continue with it I gave him the old poker face. Never heard back from them, after spending about 3 hours in their company doing various tests and 2x seperate interviews with different people.

BattleCorp

1ZRed wrote: »

How kids like this fall on their ass onto a pile of money I'll never know:rolleyes:

The twat also thinks that the Sistine Chapel is called the 16th Chapel ;););)

ringadingding

I was flown to vienna for a head chef job interview,
Arrived and went for lunch with the boss, he brought me to 4/5 restaurants through out the day discussing plans and visions, we got drunk, really really drunk, at around 3 am, one of the head chefs from one of the earlier restaurants swung for me, pure fluke I glanced him away and he fell onto tables breaking 3 ribs ( found out later),
we carried on, went back to his place, he went to bed and later caught me drunken **** in his living room, I went to the spare room and woke up dying for a piss, went into the bathroom, yup, wrong door, I was naked in the apartment building hallway, normally you'd just stay where you are and bang on the door, but at that moment the lift door started to open, so I legged it down the stairs, naked, in vienna at 7/8 am.
I got totally disorientated in the building and found solice in the dark basement trying to work out the **** just happened
After knocking on random doors, somebody threw a towel at me, so I was covered-Ish, finally found the right apartment.

And got the job

He always tell that story and says anybody who had the balls to look him in the eye the next morning has enough mettle to run his kitchen.
We did some great things together !

BillyMitchel

whendovescry wrote: »

My cousin was being interviewed for a position at spar and the manager asked him how long did he envision working there. His reply was 'as long as it takes to earn enough money to get a real job' needless to say he wasn't offered the job

He could be related :O

BillyMitchel

whendovescry wrote: »

My cousin was being interviewed for a position at spar and the manager asked him how long did he envision working there. His reply was 'as long as it takes to earn enough money to get a real job' needless to say he wasn't offered the job

We could be related :O

Spore

^^ Dafuq did I just read?!!!

northernpower

Lad I used to work with, could be bull****, going for recruitment for royal navy

Interviewer: Can you swim?

Adrian: Why have ye no boats?

1ZRed

Went to an interview there two days ago. It was for a garage so you're basically going to be changing tyres , fixing punctures the usual sh/t.

Anyway the owners are husband and wife so I was being interviewed by them. I got on really well with her making jokes and then it got onto drink and how seriously they taking being hung over half drunk and whatever so she said if you're at (the local) we'll have to guys suss you out the next day or if you're down at the beach the night before, said with a laugh btw. So I though yeah this is going good I'm getting on really well and joking with both of them why not tell a few stories about what I've gotten up to. So I proceeded to tell them about how me and my friends used to throw big beach parties (when I say beach it was more a quarry) and how it was kind of raided by the guards once. They laughed and said they'd be in contact with me within two days. Nothing!

It wasn't exactly a fck up of an interview but I'm never going to be so open like that again!:rolleyes: I have no experience with interviews so I suppose it can be seen as a learning curve?

wilkie2006

1ZRed wrote: »

Went to an interview there two days ago. It was for a garage so you're basically going to be changing tyres , fixing punctures the usual sh/t.

Anyway the owners are husband and wife so I was being interviewed by them. I got on really well with her making jokes and then it got onto drink and how seriously they taking being hung over half drunk and whatever so she said if you're at (the local) we'll have to guys suss you out the next day or if you're down at the beach the night before, said with a laugh btw. So I though yeah this is going good I'm getting on really well and joking with both of them why not tell a few stories about what I've gotten up to. So I proceeded to tell them about how me and my friends used to throw big beach parties (when I say beach it was more a quarry) and how it was kind of raided by the guards once. They laughed and said they'd be in contact with me within two days. Nothing!

It wasn't exactly a fck up of an interview but I'm never going to be so open like that again!:rolleyes: I have no experience with interviews so I suppose it can be seen as a learning curve?

I wouldn't worry about it after only two days. In my experience (and I've just realised that I've been to a lot of interviews) you'll always wait at least half a week longer than the interviewers say you will. They will get back to you either way though. Who knows, maybe your honesty and openness struck a chord with them?! You might be working there this time next month. Best of luck! Let us know what they say.

Brendog

I once sneezed mid sentence. As I moved my hand away a massive blob of snot was attached to my hand.

I looked up and realised both interviewers looking at me like this.
I didn't know what to do, so I just wiped it in the chair.

I don't blame them for not shaking my hand

Brendog

JohnMarston wrote: »

I went to an interview for an internship at an IT company back in february. I was seen into this office which had a desk place in the left corner, and a huge conference table facing you as you walk in.

I was asked to sit down at the left end of the table facing the this guy. He was one of those fellas you can tell immeadiately he's a kn*b. So, i sat down, thinking he would join me at the table and have the interview, and that he was just finishing up something.

Twenty seconds later he glaced at me and said "so? tell me why you want this internship" and went back to his work. This threw me right off, but i gave my answer. 15 seconds then pass with complete silence, he throws me another glance and "why should i take you on?" Still bewildered by the manner this interview was being conducted, i gave my answer. Without looking up, he smirked at one corner of his mouth and said "Ok, thank you for your time"
Wanting to leave with some composure, i approached the desk, said thank you, and offered my hand. Barely glancing up, he limp-wristedly shook my hand and i left.

I dont think i fupped up, he did. Good luck finding someone to work under you, you tw*t :mad:

Some people are absolute prats when it comes to interviews. They see it as their chance to make themselves out as important as possible.

My girlfriend went for an interview with a Dublin based law firm. I went over with some basic questions with her and had no doubt she would do great.

I rang her after it and she said they wanted her to make a powerpoint presentation about her achievements and why they should hire her.
I made the powerpoint and she wrote que cards because shes not a great public speaker.

She rang me after she was done and said they didn't want her to do it if she was using que cards.


Its a shame how "being good at your job" is one of the last things interviewers want these days.

im invisible

Brendog wrote: »

Some people are absolute prats when it comes to interviews. They see it as their chance to make themselves out as important as possible.

My girlfriend went for an interview with a Dublin based law firm. I went over with some basic questions with her and had no doubt she would do great.

I rang her after it and she said they wanted her to make a powerpoint presentation about her achievements and why they should hire her.
I made the powerpoint and she wrote que cards because shes not a great public speaker.

She rang me after she was done and said they didn't want her to do it if she was using que cards.


Its a shame how "being good at your job" is one of the last things interviewers want these days.

cue cards? For a Powerpoint presentation?

Mance Rayder

Brendog wrote: »

I once sneezed mid sentence. As I moved my hand away a massive blob of snot was attached to my hand.

I looked up and realised both interviewers looking at me like this.
I didn't know what to do, so I just wiped it in the chair.

I don't blame them for not shaking my hand

Brillant :pac:

mtjm

I went for an interview for a UK facilities firm based in north dublin, so I was given the address and contact number etc... Girlfriend at the time who had stayed the night in my place gave me a lift to the industrial estate (she worked in the same area) we spend 10 minutes trying to find this place, so tried ringing the interviwer (UK number and yes I used the prefix) phone just kept bleeping so walked for another 10 minutes finally found it. (still 10 minutes early).


Cue manager calling me in, so we talked for 10 minutes or so and asked me what my asking salary, gave him a price, (it was a grand more to what I was earning in my current position) the interviewer said oh we won't be able to go on that price as we're offering is conciderable lower (it was 3 grand less to what I was working on at the time)


I just said look even if I was offered the job you didn't have your salary range on the website and thank you for wasting my time and good luck.

needless to say I didn't get the job :cool:

Krispie

Phone interview for telesales and after the HR one telling me about the min wage position + commission, which could bring me up to the average company salary of 21k:mad:, (I have grown up bills to pay), she asked what could I bring to the company?
My reply "A packed lunch with those wages as I can't afford to eat in your canteen".

Needless to say, still looking for work.:D

bellylint

In my first interview at the age of 17 for a job doing IT support, I was still a bit frazzled by people in authority. It was before my eye surgery too. I got so nervous that my glasses actually fogged up, so I took them off. I used to have a habit of pushing my glasses up my nose too with my middle finger... I noticed them looking at me funny whenever I did this and could tell the mood of the interview was turning. I think I must have looked like an immature tw*t giving them the finger, alas I didnt get the job!

Oh how I have changed(now I am a muture tw*t )

JohnMarston

Brendog wrote: »

Some people are absolute prats when it comes to interviews. They see it as their chance to make themselves out as important as possible.

My girlfriend went for an interview with a Dublin based law firm. I went over with some basic questions with her and had no doubt she would do great.

I rang her after it and she said they wanted her to make a powerpoint presentation about her achievements and why they should hire her.
I made the powerpoint and she wrote que cards because shes not a great public speaker.

She rang me after she was done and said they didn't want her to do it if she was using que cards.


Its a shame how "being good at your job" is one of the last things interviewers want these days.

Thats no way to carry on. Even though i have heard of presentations in interviews, you should NEVER spring it on somebody during an interview, you tell them in advance. Your CV should suffice if they do not specify otherwise.

If that's the way they conduct business you don't want to work for them

stargazer 68

I had an interview a few years ago - abroad - with a huge advertising company. During the interview the guy asked me if I had seen any of their ads. So I raved about the fantastic ad they had done for Coke (it really was good) and how brilliant it was etc. When I had stopped rambling he said 'that was an ad for Pepsi and it wasn't ours'!

I got the job though - wanted to leave after the first day as he was complete and utter to**er!!

Plazaman

I was doing an interview for a multinational and their offices were freaky to say the least. Initially I though it was open plan but each office is like a glass cubicle and even though they're soundproof, you can see everything going on in each one so I could see each of the interviewees before me. There seemed to be meetings going on in the cubicles either side.

This freaked me out no end and when I was called for my interview I missed the door and walked straight into the glass partition with a resounding thud bringing the meeting next door to a full stop. I was fierce rumbled starting the interview and it got worse when three questions in, the interviewer told me my nose was bleeding. One of them had to leave to get me a tissue. It was then that I realised the group next door hadn't restarted their meeting as they were looking at what was going on with me and having a laugh about it (turns out they were the senior managers, the bastárds).

Anyway finished interview with a tissue stuck up my nose and going out I made sure I didn't miss the door again. It wasn't hard as there was a big imprint of my face on the glass wall, like the shroud of turin. That was 14 years ago and I'm still waiting to hear from them.

podgemonster

This happened to a friend of mine (honestly). He arrived into the company reception and met with the interviewer who was a short plump woman. After the handshake she informed him that the interview will take place in their temporary office across the road so told him to follow her.

The door out of the building they were in was an non-automatic revolving door with 4 segments. Unfortunately due to nerves he wasn't thinking straight and followed her into the same segments and when she pushed for the door to swing they got wedged together in a compromising position and shuffled awkwardly until they got outside. He was mortified.

He got the job though.

antodeco

JohnMarston wrote: »

Brendog wrote: »

Some people are absolute prats when it comes to interviews. They see it as their chance to make themselves out as important as possible.

My girlfriend went for an interview with a Dublin based law firm. I went over with some basic questions with her and had no doubt she would do great.

I rang her after it and she said they wanted her to make a powerpoint presentation about her achievements and why they should hire her.
I made the powerpoint and she wrote que cards because shes not a great public speaker.

She rang me after she was done and said they didn't want her to do it if she was using que cards.


Its a shame how "being good at your job" is one of the last things interviewers want these days.

Thats no way to carry on. Even though i have heard of presentations in interviews, you should NEVER spring it on somebody during an interview, you tell them in advance. Your CV should suffice if they do not specify otherwise.

If that's the way they conduct business you don't want to work for them

Sure I was told mid interview before that it's now the 'presentation' piece so they have me half an hour to put together a presentation and deliver it!

saiint

i have an interview next week
on wensday
now after reading all your fcuk ups
i can safely say i am screwed ha

Dr.Sanchez

mikemac1 wrote: »

Was a penniless student and looking for my first bar job

Hard to get a job with no experience so bla, bla, I spent a summer working in North London

On I know that area, do you Finchley High Street?

I froze, didn't know what to say. I'm not good at blagging

Didn't get the job
Was Busker Browns in Galway

Were you studying english..?

padma

Had an interview for a job in Limerick in Dublin for 8.30a.m with a crowd for a sales rep role. Struggled to put petrol in the car and got there with half an hour to spare and get a coffee. Met the receptionist and was told to wait in a room. Big nice comfy couch, An hour passed by of me waiting when the receptionist came in and said they'd been delayed and will be with me shortly, Come 10 o clock I start to drift and kept pinching myself.

Anyways I knocked off around 10.30 when someone comes in and wakes me up. Was about 11 when I walked in for the interview. This guy and a HR girl. The guy turns out to be an arrogant a hole and gives out to me for falling asleep. Telling me how I'm overqualified for the role and he doesnt have any positions available. I f'd them out of it for the cost of petrol and wasting my time, for not having the decency to let me know there was no position and for getting me there for 8.30 and then walking out the door says I, the least ye could have done was let me sleep instead of waking me up for a bull**** interview.

mikemac1

Dr.Sanchez wrote: »

Were you studying english..?

What do you mean

Dots1982

RVP 11 wrote: »

I once told an interviewer his wife was a ride (her photo on the desk)
Got the job too.:D

If that's true then you should be knighted.

Sykk

90% of the stories in here are bullshít. People didn't respond to their ignorant interviewers with a smart brazen "Fúck you" response that left them dumbfounded. They quietly took it all and muttered something of a thanks on their way out then imagined the rest in their head later on.

Thatnastyboy

Sykk wrote: »

90% of the stories in here are bullshít. People didn't respond to their ignorant interviewers with a smart brazen "Fúck you" response that left them dumbfounded. They quietly took it all and muttered something of a thanks on their way out then imagined the rest in their head later on.

Who cares,

They're funny as **** :pac:


Unfortunately I've nothing much to ad,

despite flying through aptitude tests & interviews for a MNC, then failing the medical miserably.. goddamn weed :pac:

Tabnabs

To get into Architecture in Bolton Street you have to do an interview as part of the entry process. A mate of mine was sitting in front of the 3 man panel and was doing really well, answering intelligently, showing a good understanding of the principles of architecture etc.

He was asked for one building he liked and one he disliked (and why). He went on about the building he liked to nods of approvals from the panel and then went on to fairly slate the building he disliked. At the end of the interview he stood up and shook hands with the panel and the senior interviewer held his hand particularly tightly and looked him in the eye and said "that was my building you tore strips out of by the way".

He got onto the course in fairness but the old bugger never let it go about the critique.

pickarooney

bbam wrote: »

The brought me in on the second round of interviews and ingot the job.

Pure gold!

keithclancy

We got a guy in and I mulled over his CV, wrote down a few questions.

Left the HR Lady ask all her stuff, then the IS Manager.

Then I asked him the questions, IT stuff ...

Me: How long have you been using X Software for.

Him: Oh i've never used that before.

Me: But it's on your CV

Him: let me see *takes CV off me* oh yes then I must have used it before.

Me: .......

Him: This is unfair, you should have sent me a description of the questions you were going to ask before the Interview.

He then told us politely to fúck off in Dutch and left.


The agency rang the next day to complain that we had given an unfair Interview to their candidate.

We didn't use that Agency again ... he didn't get the job either.

These days I check the word documents properties and see how many times its been edited. If theres a lot between the creation date and today then its probably, mostly, bull$hit.

Dr.Sanchez

keithclancy wrote: »

We got a guy in and I mulled over his CV, wrote down a few questions.

Left the HR Lady ask all her stuff, then the IS Manager.

Then I asked him the questions, IT stuff ...

Me: How long have you been using X Software for.

Him: Oh i've never used that before.

Me: But it's on your CV

Him: let me see *takes CV off me* oh yes then I must have used it before.

Me: .......

Him: This is unfair, you should have sent me a description of the questions you were going to ask before the Interview.

He then told us politely to fúck off in Dutch and left.


The agency rang the next day to complain that we had given an unfair Interview to their candidate.

We didn't use that Agency again ... he didn't get the job either.

These days I check the word documents properties and see how many times its been edited. If theres a lot between the creation date and today then its probably, mostly, bull$hit.

I wouldn't agree with this, I'm always tweaking and updating my CV with an objective to suit the position I'm applying for. Plus, none of mine is bull****. I always send mine in PDF format anyway...

wilkie2006

mtjm wrote: »

Cue manager calling me in, so we talked for 10 minutes or so and asked me what my asking salary, gave him a price, (it was a grand more to what I was earning in my current position) the interviewer said oh we won't be able to go on that price as we're offering is conciderable lower (it was 3 grand less to what I was working on at the time)

That's happened to me before too. Applied for a job that I thought looked interesting, progressed to an assessment round, and then was invited for an interview. They hadn't advertised the salary but I thought it would have been roughly what I was on or maybe even up to 10k more (I didn't ask upfront because I didn't want to give the impression that's all I cared about). Finally get the job offer and have a look at the contract - 13k less than what I'd been on! :eek:

I couldn't believe that I'd allowed them waste so much of my time (I'd spent about 15-20 hours working on their tests and preparing for the interview). I was fcuking fuming with them. I really considered emailing them to tell them what sly cnuts they were (they would have been able to guess my salary from my CV) but ended up just sending the "Ah, thanks a million but I regret to say..." message.

Big Nasty

keithclancy wrote: »

These days I check the word documents properties and see how many times its been edited. If theres a lot between the creation date and today then its probably, mostly, bull$hit.

I would imagine most people would tweak their CV for the position they are applying for.