One item/thing that you couldnt do without?

Buyingcar2012

I will be a first time parent this November. I am reading as much as I can online and in books to prepare me.

I am also starting to look at buying items at this stage which is a little overwhelming as there are so much things needed, especially for a first time parent.

I am looking for recommendations of one item that you would recommend to buy, something that has been most useful etc

e.g. a friend recommended a slumber bear for getting her newborn to sleep

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Prince-Lionheart-Slumber-Bear-Cream/dp/B000L3ISWI/ref=sr_1_1?s=baby&ie=UTF8&qid=1340889403&sr=1-1

Ayla

I think there is a *lot* that is unneccessary but that we all buy into as new parents who feel vulnerable. Keep in mind that you don't have to have 90% of the stuff before the child is born - you can buy it as the need develops & you decide you *have* to have it.

The #1 item for either of my newborns: muslin cloths. For spit up/pillows/changing areas/anything. Nothing else got used as much as my muslins.

pwurple

Nothing is really essential, all nice to haves.

Clothes from ikea, a good buggy and some soothers would be all I'd get.

ariana`

Buyingcar2012 wrote: »

e.g. a friend recommended a slumber bear for getting her newborn to sleep

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Prince-Lionheart-Slumber-Bear-Cream/dp/B000L3ISWI/ref=sr_1_1?s=baby&ie=UTF8&qid=1340889403&sr=1-1

Congratulations! I'm interested to read the replies, i'm sure they will vary a lot. I didn't have a slumber bear, my son was a good sleeper from early on, i used to put him in the cot nice and relaxed, sometimes i would have to rub his belly for a few mins to soothe him, and then leave him to nod off himself. Happy memories

I think the changing table was a god send but that's because i've a bad back, it was great changing/bathing him without having to bend down or kneel over him.

Suucee

Ill second the muslin clothes, so handy and very absorbent. Also be careful with the pram you choose. I got a large travel system, with carrycot, car seat and stroller all parts go on separetly. It is very light and has great suspension for walks along the canal (a three wheeler with big wheels), its not great for trying to get around shops and getting it into the car with alot of shopping is impossible so i ended up buying an umberella fold stroller also. Also got a car seat that is permanetly left in the car (handy as i often go for a walk and meet my partner after work) so the cary tot car seat that came with my travel system isnt used that often either.

Buyingcar2012

Thanks for the advice so far. Would you mind linking to any products that you may have bought e.g.

is there any specific brand of muslin cloths that are best?
is ther any soothers that are best?

I find the choice a bit too much at times!

Ayla

Honestly, don't torture yourself this way. You will find your own way in time, and your child won't suffer a bit for it.

There are a million brands of everything, and some will work for you & some won't. That's why any suggestion of specific brands, etc isn't really a good idea - soothers, for instance (if you use them at all - they don't have be a neccessity!) are designed differently and it'll likely be hit & miss until you find one that your child takes. Same with bottles (if you use them), nappies, prams etc. etc etc.

I understand the desire to have it all sorted, but - talking from a bit of experience here - let it happen as it will. All the baby needs the first while is somewhere to sleep, warm clothes, nappies, food & love. Everything else is just details.

Suucee

I tried loads of different soothers, but found my lil woman prefers mam soothers. also do not stock up on a certain bottle or soothers until you try it a few times. i got loads of tommee tippee bottles and soothers but when she was 4 weeks old couldnt get her to drink it and became very windy, changed the teats and that worked for a week and the problem occured again, tried with avent bottles and nuk but wouldnt work. Eventually discovered dr brown bottles and have to say they work wonders for her. Was using gripe water and now cut it out completly. My sis in law had the same problem with bottles and she had also stocked up on avent before babs was born and her lil woman wouldnt take to them so she had to change also.
Also i stocked up on nappies and wipes anytime i seen them on offer (never paid full price for wipes). Or baby lotion and baby bath. But be careful of doing this incase your babs has a reaction to a certain brand. This didnt happen to me thank god as i have boxes bought and it doesnt make a difference if i use pampers or johnsons. Also with nappies i dont find any difference, have used pampers, tesco, aldi and makes no difference at all.

Squiggler

All a newborn really needs (other than love etc.) is food and clothing.

What you need to be able to provide that will depend on many factors, whether you're breastfeeding, planning to co-sleep etc.

Even a travel system isn't a necessity (there are many slings and carriers out there that can be used for newborn up).

We decided we couldn't do without a changing table. We're both tall and have had back problems. The one we got has lots of shelves so it's great for storing baby's clothes and nappies etc.

For everything baby related there is a huge range in terms of cost and quality. If you're planning to have more than one baby buy the best you can afford (not necessarily the most expensive) when it comes to things that can be re-used.

ariana`

I couldn't agree more with the previous posts. I bought & borrowed about 10 different brands of soothers and my baby never took to any of them. It's all trial & error.

One thing you will need is a car seat to bring baby home from hospital. Other than that as others have said clothes, food (doesn't necessarily need to be purchased ), somewhere to sleep (moses basket/cot) and lots & lots of love and a pinch of patience

Cat Melodeon

My experiences with baby 1 and baby 2 were very different.

Baby 1 slept in an Armsreach cosleeper crib as they are great if you're breastfeeding; baby 2 just sleeps in the bed with me.

Baby 1 wore organic cotton babygros; baby 2 wears whatever is clean (or at least whatever doesn't smell too bad).

Baby 1 had baths every night in a Tummy Tub and then in a bath fitting in the big bath; baby 2 has baths maybe once a week/fortnight in the kitchen sink where baby 1 is less likely to be able to reach her and drown/maim her.

Baby 1 was breastfed and took Avent bottles of expressed milk for which I used the Avent steriliser and breastpump; baby 2 is breastfed but I haven't unpacked the steriliser this time (no point when baby 1 likes to shove his fingers/toys/dinner/twigs/random found objects in baby 2's gob when given the chance). I've barely used the breastpump this time either.

Baby 1 was rocked to sleep at night on the Babylo glider chair with a pretty music box playing and a Fisherprice light display to look at; baby 2 is put in the cot and if she wants to cry, fine, but I'm usually too busy wrestling baby 1 into bed to do anything about it so she doesn't bother and goes off to sleep herself.


Having a first baby can be very stressful if you concern yourself too much with how things SHOULD be or what you SHOULD have. You'll need to find your own groove and in that, only be guided by what your baby seems to need. Don't listen to advice from people who aren't extremely close to you. I listened to my older sister and my mother-in-law (who's lovely) and that was it.

For a newborn, as long as you have nappies, food for you and baby, a buggy, clothes, maybe a cot, then you're doing okay. Of the extras, the things I definitely don't regret buying are a good tall changing table (ours is babylo), muslin cloths (I got some from Tesco, Asda, Mothercare - they're all as good as each other), Graco buggy & car seat (cheap, sturdy, most importantly lightweight) and that's about it. Everything else is just window dressing.

And what suits one person/baby may not work for you and your baby. I had to use pampers for the first 3-4 months with both my babies as they had extremely sensitive skin, and only then could I switch to the cheaper Aldi/Tesco ones. One of mine was ok with Sudocreme; on the other it had no effect & I had to use Bepanthan. One of mine loved the walker, the other can't abide it. One of mine hated the swing chair, the other loves it. One never crawled, went straight to walking no never got much use out of the floor mat, the other is crawling already and is never off the playmat.

Take your time with it, enjoy it, don't buy too much now as so much stuff is unnecessary. And congratulations!

Buyingcar2012

Cat Melodeon wrote: »

My experiences with baby 1 and baby 2 were very different.

Baby 1 slept in an Armsreach cosleeper crib as they are great if you're breastfeeding; baby 2 just sleeps in the bed with me.

Baby 1 wore organic cotton babygros; baby 2 wears whatever is clean (or at least whatever doesn't smell too bad).

Baby 1 had baths every night in a Tummy Tub and then in a bath fitting in the big bath; baby 2 has baths maybe once a week/fortnight in the kitchen sink where baby 1 is less likely to be able to reach her and drown/maim her.

Baby 1 was breastfed and took Avent bottles of expressed milk for which I used the Avent steriliser and breastpump; baby 2 is breastfed but I haven't unpacked the steriliser this time (no point when baby 1 likes to shove his fingers/toys/dinner/twigs/random found objects in baby 2's gob when given the chance). I've barely used the breastpump this time either.

Baby 1 was rocked to sleep at night on the Babylo glider chair with a pretty music box playing and a Fisherprice light display to look at; baby 2 is put in the cot and if she wants to cry, fine, but I'm usually too busy wrestling baby 1 into bed to do anything about it so she doesn't bother and goes off to sleep herself.


Having a first baby can be very stressful if you concern yourself too much with how things SHOULD be or what you SHOULD have. You'll need to find your own groove and in that, only be guided by what your baby seems to need. Don't listen to advice from people who aren't extremely close to you. I listened to my older sister and my mother-in-law (who's lovely) and that was it.

For a newborn, as long as you have nappies, food for you and baby, a buggy, clothes, maybe a cot, then you're doing okay. Of the extras, the things I definitely don't regret buying are a good tall changing table (ours is babylo), muslin cloths (I got some from Tesco, Asda, Mothercare - they're all as good as each other), Graco buggy & car seat (cheap, sturdy, most importantly lightweight) and that's about it. Everything else is just window dressing.

And what suits one person/baby may not work for you and your baby. I had to use pampers for the first 3-4 months with both my babies as they had extremely sensitive skin, and only then could I switch to the cheaper Aldi/Tesco ones. One of mine was ok with Sudocreme; on the other it had no effect & I had to use Bepanthan. One of mine loved the walker, the other can't abide it. One of mine hated the swing chair, the other loves it. One never crawled, went straight to walking no never got much use out of the floor mat, the other is crawling already and is never off the playmat.

Take your time with it, enjoy it, don't buy too much now as so much stuff is unnecessary. And congratulations!

Thanks! Very informative - what was the type of Graco buggy that you got?

dublinlady

Cat ur hilarious and so right!!!

Again muslin cloths, soother ( just buy 1 pk of avent or sonething plain to see if they like!) for me good travel system - in a good one with the right mattress and cover u can even use the pram as Moses basket - sob for travelling it's all ya need! Moses basket...! Changing table. Don't go mad on size one nappies as ya could have a big baba who grows out of them within a week!
Bottles wise - def only buy 2 until u sure ur baba likes them! I ended up on dr browns due to colicky baby - have 6 avent bottles now sitting doing nothing!! Maybe next baby will like them
I would have 2 cellular blankets. 6 baby gros and 6 vest. 1 hat. 1 scratch mittens. Then see how u fair after presents! We got soooo much clothes! Still arriving and shes 19 weeks!

As the others say - relax about it as you really don't need alot, in fact u don't know what u need until u meet ur individual! Again breast or bottle feeders need diff things!

Shops open such long hrs now ur not likely to be stuck!

Congrats - best thing I ever did!

Hannibal Smith

My husband! Don't mean to be soppy but he really makes everything so much easier

littlemissfixit

if breastfeeding: tube of lansinoh cream! Saved me both times.
moses basket but mainly because we live in a 2 storey, baby can sleep in same room we're in during the day.

Queen of Sheebs

Tommy tippee bibs with the rim around the neck....ds spilled so much milk out of the corners of his mouth and they saved his clothes. A big tub of silcocks base (about €4). I used in melted in boiling water as his soap for the first 2 months and use it after baths now. Arnica tablets for yourself. The luxury item that I got and love and use everyday is the kub arden glider chair. My sisters chipped in and bought it for us. Brilliant at night...bottle feed and now for storytime. If u can borrow a travel system.or buy second hand then do. U use them for such a short period of time. Spend your money on a good light weight stroller. Different coloured sponges for top & tail washing. A changing mat for nighttime and daytime if using different areas for nappy changes.

Lisha

Congrats OP, I have to agree with the other posters especially on not buying too much, (you will get presents too), you will find what you need as it suit you.
Muslin cloths are amazing.
I used a crib rather than a moses basket. Crib lasts until baby is approx 6months.
Gro bags really worked for us, (But my sister in law hated them) We used them from about 5 weeks to nearly 2yrs on both. THen I used the cellular blankets for buggy.
I liked to use sleeveless jackets when baby in car seat ( I have a small fear of baby over heating.)
For first baby I had baby monitor that did not have temp function, I then bought a gro-egg room temp monitor. THat broke so for second child I bought baby monitor with temp function , best thing ever I would say.

When choosing buggy do look at the one s that convert into a double if needed.

THe one thing I think is an essential though is the Braun ear thermometer. THey are nearly 70quid:eek: but worth it IMHO. Boychild is nearly 5 now and we still using it
And books loads of books kids love being read to it really is the best thing ever
Also the book what to expect in first year is an excellent reference book, as well as Dr Miriam Stoppards complete child and baby care, an excellent practical reference book

But please OP, if some one offers you a crib/cot/travel cot/clothes/toys/whatever please, please take them. THe older the child gets the more expensive they get. What you buy in the first year prob only last the first year. (Just always buy new matresses that s the only thing to remember)
Best of luck enjoy, and seriously dont go mad

Ps I did not use a walker but I did use the baby einstein baby entertainer (think a walker that does not move) it was a God send, also a baby seat is useful, but only to be used until baby can sit up, about 7 months
http://www.boohoobaby.ie/prod_show.asp?prodid=877
THis is a fab seat very pricy but gorgeous, I loved it

I also had the slumber and we loved it not sure if it worked but it definately helped to calm me at times

liliq

The Wonder Weeks book and a good sling... not one of those crotch dangler things, but something like a JPMBB or Mei Tai!
+1 on the Lanisoh if breastfeeding, along with Multimam compresses, and contact detals for Cuidiu breastfeeding counsellors/ La Leche League leaders... Life savers!!

AmcD

Car seat: compulsory to get home from hospital. If your car has isofix it is definitely worth getting a car seat with an isofix base. That means that you can snap the car seat onto the base without worrying about seat-belts. Very handy when the baby is light enough to be carried about in it. The same seats can usually be used with seat-belts e.g. in a grandparent's car.

Changing mat: very useful to catch streams of things from either end of the baby. Also doubles as a handy place for a newborn to happily kick their legs and watch you.

Bouncer chair: either get a really cheap one or borrow one. Don't get one of the chairs with full Cirque du Soleil accessories- these only take up space and your baby won't appreciate it. If your baby likes it (most do), it is another place to be able to put your baby down.

Buggy: doesn't matter about the brand. Go to a large nursery shop and park outside it. Get an assistant to help you fold up and put various buggies in the boot of your car. See how you cope with the size/weight. A hood that gives extensive protection from rain/sun is also a bonus.

If you are breast-feeding consider getting a nursing pillow. These are C-shaped cushions that make positioning really comfortable. It means you can also have a hand free for TV remote/cup of tea/fending toddler off. Of course you could happily feed without one, but anything that makes life a bit easier is good. They are also good for resting laptops on for non-nursing members of the household and for supporting a baby that is just starting to sit up.

Gro-bags from TK Maxx: sleeping bags for babies. No covers to kick off. My toddler still sleeps in them

Mrs Fox

AmcD wrote: »

If you are breast-feeding consider getting a nursing pillow. These are C-shaped cushions that make positioning really comfortable.

I didn't think this was a necessity but ohmygod the comfort it gives when nursing my bubs. Got the inflatable nursing pillow from Boots which I found so much better than the ones provided in the hospital.

Sparks

Squiggler wrote: »

All a newborn really needs (other than love etc.) is food and clothing.

If even that; the best list of essentials I've ever seen reads:

• Nappies
• Boobs

Even a travel system isn't a necessity (there are many slings and carriers out there that can be used for newborn up).

Yes, but you can't drive him/her home from the hospital without a baby seat for the car, and I personally wouldn't take them on public transport in a sling...

I think the OP's request isn't a fulfillable one though - I can't think of a one-item list of things we couldn't do without; I could get a short list, yes, but not one-item long

Unless the list doesn't have to be a list of physical things?
Because if so, I'd put "the right frame of mind" in as the one thing you can't do without.



Oh, and I'd also say that if you ask for advice like this, you'll be given it until you drown by everyone (me included), so there's a quote of Bhudda's that you need to live by when you ask for advice on this

Bhudda wrote:

“Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense.”

And having said that, here's my list of essentials (for both baby and for the delivery ward) in case it helps.

implausible

Muslin cloths - throwing up, cleaning up, covering up

Travel cot - daytime/downstairs cot, travelling, baby jail, toy dump

I swore I'd never use a dodie:rolleyes:, ended up using a free Nuk one in the eumom bag. Have one in the house just in case.

Squiggler

Sparks wrote: »

Yes, but you can't drive him/her home from the hospital without a baby seat for the car, and I personally wouldn't take them on public transport in a sling...

We don't have a car and have no intention of buying one in the near future. We're also hoping for a planned home birth, so we won't need a car seat for a while. Baby won't be travelling in cars for a few months at least. If we do have go to the hospital we'll probably be walking home.

Love the boobs and nappies cut down list. A friend of mine who is trying (successfully) elimination communication techniques with her baby reckons maybe you can get by without nappies too.

So, I guess the absolute must have is boobs, with everything else being trimming?!

Moonbeam

On my 1st and 2nd it was different on my 1st definitely my maxi cosi mura ,seriously the best buy ever.
On my 2nd the nursing pillow made a huge difference comfort wise to feeding.

Muslin cloths are a must, Ikea do nice big ones.

Sparks

Squiggler wrote: »

So, I guess the absolute must have is boobs, with everything else being trimming?!

Well, humans managed with just those for tens of thousands of years...
...but on the other hand we also had enormous infant mortality and pooped everywhere

JoeyJJ

My two would be

If bottle feeding get one of these. Try counting with no sleep.


And a baby monitor with a mat to detect movement.

Buyingcar2012

JoeyJJ wrote: »

My two would be

If bottle feeding get one of these. Try counting with no sleep.


And a baby monitor with a mat to detect movement.

Do you have a link to that measuring device?

SlimCi

We were always travelling while my young man was a baby and I found a little container in boots which dispensed the formula powder, from four different sections so I could just add the powder to the cold boiled water to make up a fresh bottle as I needed it. Found it invaluable. He'll be 8 next week, so there are probably a hundred other better inventions since then, but best of luck with it:D Don't know where the time goes...

JoeyJJ

Buyingcar2012 wrote: »

Do you have a link to that measuring device?

You can get them in boots I think. Great esp for night feeds.

Neyite

Muslins here too! I got mine in tesco, and in white so I can soak them in napisan and not worry about colours running and the like. Great as burp cloths, for protecting visitors clothes who want a cuddle, as breathable covers for nursing in public, for draping over baby when airing his bum so pee does not go everywhere. For mopping up all sorts! We got about 25 and that is loads.

Also for me, the monitor with sensor mat was a must. It gives peace of mind to you when you are a new parent. This is the one we got: http://www.amazon.co.uk/Angelcare-AC401-Movement-Sensor-Monitor/dp/B0013FW5G8/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1340983141&sr=8-1 but some swear by the video ones too.

We swore too that we wouldnt use a soother, but when getting a newborn used to the carseat or buggy initially it settled them so we have ended up using them.

Another thing I think is genius is the large sponge that you sit baby on in the bath. Its a great help because babies are so slippery when in the bath. Just get the water the right temperature before putting it in rather than before incase it holds hot-spots that could hurt baby. You can pay between €4 and €10 so it'll hardly break the bank.
http://www.smythstoys.com/bathing-and-changing-182sc/babylo-bath-sponge-107365itm.aspx

One suggestion I would have is to organise a stash of thankyou cards and stamps before you have your baby. That way you can write them as you receive the gifts - because now I have forgotton some of who got us what, as I was still wrecked from my C-section at the time they were given to me. The joys of Mamnesia.

Or if you want to handmake nice ones with a pic of baby on them, get all the ink, cards, trimmings and stamps also beforehand so you are all set after the birth to get stuck in. I wish I'd gone to the art shop beforehand.

SlimCi

Buyingcar2012 wrote: »

Do you have a link to that measuring device?

This is the exact one I was talking about, bought mine in Boots as far as I can remember.