Hugging the Irish aul fellow

Vicar in a tutu

Only benders hug their Da's.

Mr. CooL ICE

I hug my father. **** what anyone thinks. I live 2 hours from my parents and visit them about once a month and first thing I want to do when I come in the front door after a 2 hour drive in the pissing rain is hug both of them.

I feel sorry for anyone who is uptight about it. I really do. Its only a hug ffs

Agricola

The continentals slobber all over each other at the drop of a hat. Its meaningless really. But when two Irish men press each other to their bosoms, the ground shakes and thunder rolls. Its an event.

Real Life

I hug my father if im going away somewhere for a while, always did with no problems for either of us and i certainly wouldnt consider myself an emotional person. i think you would have to be very insecure to have a problem doing it, i dont see what the big deal is, i love my parents and i let them know that.

da_shivsta

me and my daddy hug sometimes, i say "love you daddy" on the phone when i'm hanging u the odd time. I'm back home after finishing college, so we don't hug every day,, just if I'm off somewhere or he's drunk. he brought me up on his own, I'm very close with him. he hugs my cousins (his nieces) etc. when he sees them - but not his sisters, my brothers, or any other males. I guess it's not just a generational thing but a gender thing.
i remember once when i was out in my first year of college, i'd only had one drink, but I hadn't left home long. I was missing dad all that day, and I rang him specially to tell him. now I said we were close, but we're still Irish like! so that was unusual, and I did feel a bit hesitant - normally i'd have a reason other than that to ring. but I'll never regret that because I'm sure he was missing me too. and it broke the awkwardness!

JupiterKid

I have a fantastic relationship with my Dad. I'm 37 and he's 72. We haven't always seen eye to eye but he loves me and my sisters with all his heart and we've hugged each other many times. He raised me after my mum died young when I was barely in my teens. He's been the best Dad anyone could wish for.

To all of yous who have never hugged your aul fella - go and do it now before it's too late and you're full of regrets. Life's way too bloody short to spend it as an emotional statue.

Mickey Dazzler

if you really want to show your father how much you care you should go down on him.

Palytoxin

Never hug him at all, and neither of us mind. It'd be a bit weird and awkward tbh.

Snowie

Lando Griffin wrote: »

Of all the 30 odd years of my life I never remember any time myself and the aul fellow hugged. Having moved a good distance from home and rarely get home to see the parents. My father is an emotional statue a bit like his father and probably all my fore fathers. When it comes to his sons a certain stuborness comes into play. Anyway this weekend when I was saying goodbye instead of shaking his hand I just gave him a great big hug. It felt great especially when he hugged back. What is it with Irish fathers and sons that it feels awkward to show emotions either way.

I hug booth my parents always well if i haven't seen them in a while these days Im pretty privileged because i get to live with them as an adult

MultiUmm

It took the death of my granddad a few months ago for myself and my dad to hug each other. It was the the night after the funeral when the afters were over and we were at home, he told me he was proud of myself and my brother for how we helped out over the course of the few days and it just felt like a natural instinct for me to hug him at that moment.

It was a poignant moment and always will be in my memory. Haven't hugged him since.

Dusty87

iv never hugged my dad. Would love to do it once, but would probably end in a fist fight

prinz

My old fella was one of those sort of uptight fellas when it came to the sons. With my sisters it was all hugs etc, with the sons a pat on the back would be as near as it came. Then he became ill and since that time he has been much more touchy-feely. Eitherway he shows it plenty of other ways, so even if we don't hug, there are many ways he shows his emotions.

Conall Cernach wrote: »

I think if my da was on his death bed his final words would be "Don't forget to water the tomatoes."

+1, except it would be about cutting the grass.:pac:

Dyr

I can't stand all these emo kids these days hugging each other because saying goodnight til tomorrow is a traumatic experience apparently, tbh it devalues the gesture

I hugged the old man the night me ma died, we were the only family members in the hospital at the time. So why the f**k would would I hug him for a trivial reason?

Precious flower

My brothers and my father never hug. Lately I've been pushing my brothers to hug each other when my brother comes home as I don't want this kind of cycle to continue. I suppose being a girl, we're much more comfortable with hugging.

It's sad really that it seems almost every Irish father and son seem to be distance. My father isn't very in touch with his feelings and I only noticed recently that we hardly ever hug each other when we do it's on special occasions (Christmas etc.) and tends to feel awkward. I've never seen him cry.

I picked up the whole 'It's weird to show your emotions in public' from him and even though I'm a girl I'd never get upset at a movie or anything else in public and I didn't even cry at my own grandmother's funeral because I wouldn't allow myself to show my emotions in public.

I finally let myself cry at a funeral when an old babysitter who I was very close to died and I felt so much better for it and realised it wasn't shameful get upset at things in front of people who aren't immediate family.

JupiterKid

Irish people really have to allow their emotions out more - I wonder if bottling it all in - especially with men - is one of the roots of our problems with alcohol and the sh*t is causes in its wake.

Dr.Strange

I really do regret not giving my Father a hug years ago when he clearly wanted to give me one but was unable to for some reason.

Both his parents died when he was young and he was sent to live with his Aunt and cousins. He was lucky he wasn't packed off to an Industrial school or something I suppose.

If I could turn back time I would tell him that I love him and give him a big hug.

I make sure I hug my kids and tell them I love them too.

pappyodaniel

Precious flower wrote: »

I finally let myself cry at a funeral when an old babysitter who I was very close to died and I felt so much better for it and realised it wasn't shameful get upset at things in front of people who aren't immediate family.

I've never cried at a funeral. Bar one.

I was about 9 or 10 when my granny passed away. I remember the viewing in the funeral home and how cold and wet a day it was. As my dad's family were well known, there was a huge turnout. I'd say we were standing there for over 4 hours. Around hour 3 I finally broke. It was a mixture of boredom, coldness and a pair of soggy wet socks that led to me being a blubbering mess.

So yes I did cry at a funeral but it was for very selfish reasons.

Dr.Zeus

The strange thing about hugging the 'aul lad is that I did it up to about age 10. He'd be off down in his garden, digging spuds and rhubarb and suchlike. He had this odd thing, he always seemed to dress up going to work in the garden, wearing an old shirt with a tie and a battered hat!! I stopped hugging him when I hit my teens but I still remember the smell and the stubbly face on him. I'm in my 40's now, he's gone 8 years. So the last time I hugged him was the day he passed away, still with the stubbly 'aul face on him.

And the second last time I hugged him would have been around 33 years ago. And that's my biggest regret!

Giselle

Dr.Zeus wrote: »

So the last time I hugged him was the day he passed away, still with the stubbly 'aul face on him.

And the second last time I hugged him would have been around 33 years ago. And that's my biggest regret!

All the reluctant huggers could take something valuable away from that.

All the love of a lifetime can be contained in a hug when it matters.