Would date a smoker?

Hardonraging

The Snipe wrote: »

I'm a smoker and my girlfriend isn't, She says she doesn't mind the taste, and she rather likes to smell of smoke (When its being smoked - I doubt its the after smell) And I always feel bad about being a smoker when I'm with her. Shes my first non-smoker girlfriend, so I find it quite hard on myself, as I feel quite guilty.

Hence, I'm actually cutting back, and planning on quitting too; because I don't think its fair on her. She doesn't nag about it or anything at all, but still! :P

In the interest of fairness tho she should compare the taste difference between a smokers and a non smokers .. for ehh science i guess..

Skuxx

I always had it in my mind that I wouldn't! But then I started to really fancy the girl who works in the local shop, I eventually asked her out and by the time she pulled out a fag on our first date, it was to late, I was in love!!! I'm very glad now I didn't put a stop on the whole thing just because she was a smoker! 18 months on and shes on the way to quitting, 2 months off 'em now!!

PhlegmyMoses

You would have to be some kind of emotional cripple to make something as common as smoking the deal-breaker in a relationship.

Actual real-life conversation I had:*

"You are the kindest guy ever, you have the mind of a scientist, arm like a rocket and a cock like a Burmese python. But you smoke. No, I know that for most people, smoking is a transient thing and you will probably give up in a few years but the smell is bad. What do you mean you had to look past things too? What do you mean I always smell of cheese and onion crisps? What do you mean when you say that you were willing to look past the fact that my mother looks like Mo Mowlem's uglier twin that they kept in the attic and fed fish heads and that I'll most likely turn out that way? How very dare you? Only I may set the arbitrary rules of engagement. It is only I who needs to look past heinous flaws such as smoking. I am perfect. You should count yourself lucky that I actually deign to speak to a lowly smoker such as yourself."

*Dramatisation. May not have happened.

The Big Red Button

I don't smoke, wouldn't find smoking a turn-off though. I did briefly date a smoker, didn't really affect me in any way.

saiint

yes i would
and i currently am

suppose that i smoke i dont really give a sh*t

Bad Panda

I suppose the people who are so vehemently against dating a smoker, would have no problem going out on first date and getting hammered, or going out with someone who's idea of fun is getting wasted every weekend. :rolleyes:

whatdoicare

Bad Panda wrote: »

I suppose the people who are so vehemently against dating a smoker, would have no problem going out on first date and getting hammered, or going out with someone who's idea of fun is getting wasted every weekend. :rolleyes:

Actually, I wouldnt date a smoker and I also wouldn't date a heavy drinker.
I'm happily married to a great guy who doesn't smoke and, like me, has better things to be doing than getting wasted.
We enjoy a glass of good wine with a steak though. : )

Giselle

Bad Panda wrote: »

I suppose the people who are so vehemently against dating a smoker, would have no problem going out on first date and getting hammered, or going out with someone who's idea of fun is getting wasted every weekend. :rolleyes:

You would be wrong with that supposition.

saiint

whatdoicare wrote: »

Actually, I wouldnt date a smoker and I also wouldn't date a heavy drinker.
I'm happily married to a great guy who doesn't smoke and, like me, has better things to be doing than getting wasted.
We enjoy a glass of good wine with a steak though. : )

if thats the case why you in after hours?
people here are generaly wasted when on this haha

do you live in dublin? if yes i bet you any money i can guess where you live...

Tombi!

Bad Panda wrote: »

I suppose the people who are so vehemently against dating a smoker, would have no problem going out on first date and getting hammered, or going out with someone who's idea of fun is getting wasted every weekend. :rolleyes:

TBH if my date's choice of venue was a club or a pub that doesn't serve a good meal, I wouldn't consider dating her either.

Bad Panda

Giselle wrote: »

You would be wrong with that supposition.

Oh would I?

Well I'm not completely wrong because I know people like who I've described.

SunnyDub1

everyones posts about how it's disgusting, how it smells off your clothes, how it leaves a bad taste in your mouth :rolleyes:

I'm a strong believer that if you look after your hygiene, non of above will occur.

I smoke - but after having a smoke i will always spray some body spray/perfume on me, take a mint. I would never smoke in doors, always out doors, never smoke in my car or in my home.

It's like saying I'll never date someone who drinks because he stinks of beer, breath smells of beer and can't bare the smell of farts :rolleyes:

rn

my answer is yes. Firmly in the anti-smoking group myself, never have never will smoke. Thought it would be a deal breaker, but turned out its just something I accept now... Its just her thing, doesn't really bother me.

nbar12

any hole's a goal, whether they smoke or not

listermint

syndeyfife wrote: »

It wont smell like cigarettes, unless they are homeless!!!!!

Nobody even notices the smell of cigarettes, 2 people fancy each other and they pull, great. It doesnt come into account! Ive yet to meet anyone who notices the smell off me.

Ive often said oh what do you think of smokers, they say they are horrible etc, I say im a smoker and they quickly change their tune.

Youre attracted to them or youre not, if smoking turns you off in terms of a relationship fair enough, but they are always good for a shag lol

BUBBLE WRAP wrote: »

No, its true. If you have good hygein and stuff. People will be none the wiser, that you smoke.

Im sorry kids, but your kidding yourself if you think people dont notice the smell of smoke of you. In fact its hilarious if you think they dont.

Christ i can smell it off my hands from the pint glass that has been through the wash who knows how many dozen times.

Look the long and short of it is, if you smoke and your happy have at it. I wouldnt go out with you, ive no issue being your friend. But in terms of kissing you and sleeping beside your smokey hair and smokey face and smokey clothes day in and day out. Get up the yard.

And in fairness sydney most people can get the shex, there is always someone looking for the shex smoking or not there is someone out there that will have no issues getting on you.


But if you firmly believe others cant smell it off you then your what is termed as 'smokers delusion'

They can smell it, they just arent making an issue of it and if they are happy with that then fine. Your none the wiser, and they want their end.

Tombi!

Bad Panda wrote: »

Oh would I?

Well I'm not completely wrong because I know people like who I've described.

You know everyone well enough in this thread to say we'd be fine with going on a date and getting hammered?

Bruthal

Bad Panda wrote: »

Oh would I?

Well I'm not completely wrong because I know people like who I've described.

So, what you are saying is, if you like to get hammered, then you must also like smoking, or people who smoke?

I just dont see any link between not wanting to date a smoker, and going out getting drunk.

Tombi!

robbie7730 wrote: »

So, what you are saying is, if you like to get hammered, then you must also like smoking, or people who smoke?

I just dont see any link between not wanting to date a smoker, and going out getting drunk.

I think the poster was trying to say we (in this thread) who wouldn't date a smoker would be fine with dating a heavy drinker or are heavy drinkers ourselves. I think it was more of an irony thing (you oppose smoking but are fine with drinking heavily.

sbsquarepants

I'd possibly make an exception for someone i was really into in, but in general no. My attitude to smokers has always been to fúck them, then fúck them out:)
Life is too short to spend it with someone who smells like an ashtray. Smokers breath quite literally turns my stomach, and no matter what any of you think, chewing gum, breath sprays, mouthwash - absolutely nothing covers the stench. I can tolerate that shít for small time frames, especially if i'm drunk or if there's sex on offer, but all day every day would be just too disgusting.

Captain Chaos

SunnyDub1 wrote: »

everyones posts about how it's disgusting, how it smells off your clothes, how it leaves a bad taste in your mouth :rolleyes:

I'm a strong believer that if you look after your hygiene, non of above will occur.

I smoke - but after having a smoke i will always spray some body spray/perfume on me, take a mint. I would never smoke in doors, always out doors, never smoke in my car or in my home.

It's like saying I'll never date someone who drinks because he stinks of beer, breath smells of beer and can't bare the smell of farts :rolleyes:

You are just kidding yourself, smokers smell. End off. Smokers just can't smell themselves or other smokers as smoking reduces your sense of smell and taste by a large margin over non smokers.

I have been to parties where 1 or 2 smoke and the next day I have to wash my clothes as they reek of smoke. Even in pubs years ago it was the same. The person hosting the party would even say it that the place reeked the next day of smoke. Body spray and perfume over smoke make it worse and trap in the smoke smell. Same with mints, the smoke is still there. Beer and farts go but smoke sticks into everything, just look at all the chemicals in them ffs.

SunnyDub1

listermint wrote: »

Christ i can smell it off my hands from the pint glass that has been through the wash who knows how many dozen times.

This one valid point that it's do with hygine....
Maybe people aren't washing their hands after having a smoke but tbh it sounds like that pub just has a really sh*t dishwasher :rolleyes:

Look the long and short of it is, if you smoke and your happy have at it. I wouldnt go out with you, ive no issue being your friend. But in terms of kissing you and sleeping beside your smokey hair and smokey face and smokey clothes day in and day out. Get up the yard.

Again, as a smoker I wash my hair, change my clothes, and shower daily.
if a person washes their "smokey hair", "smokey face" and "smokey clothes" day in and day out it wouldn't be an issue - again another hygiene matter

But if you firmly believe others cant smell it off you then your what is termed as 'smokers delusion'

Not auguring that people can't smell it, but I think people like yourself, take it to an exterme... TBH I can think of a lot worse smells. Like a person who smells of sh*t or has a permanent smell of BO

Captain Chaos wrote: »

I have been to parties where 1 or 2 smoke and the next day I have to wash my clothes as they reek of smoke. Even in pubs years ago it was the same. The person hosting the party would even say it that the place reeked the next day of smoke. Body spray and perfume over smoke make it worse and trap in the smoke smell. Same with mints, the smoke is still there. Beer and farts go but smoke sticks into everything, just look at all the chemicals in them ffs.

That's why it's a good idea to smoke outdoors

Bruthal

Brutal Deluxe wrote: »

I think the poster was trying to say we (in this thread) who wouldn't date a smoker would be fine with dating a heavy drinker or are heavy drinkers ourselves. I think it was more of an irony thing (you oppose smoking but are fine with drinking heavily.

Is there a connection between not wanting to date someone who smokes, and being someone who drinks?

Bruthal

SunnyDub1 wrote: »

Not auguring that people can't smell it, but I think people like yourself, take it to an exterme... TBH I can think of a lot worse smells. Like a person who smells of sh*t or has a permanent smell of BO

Just because there are worse smells, does that mean we should say ok, at least its not as bad as a sewer drain?

And a person who smells of shit, or BO, will have people who wont want to date them. Maybe smothering or masking it with perfume will help them too.

Tombi!

robbie7730 wrote: »

Is there a connection between not wanting to date someone who smokes, and being someone who drinks?

No but the connection is "you don't want to date someone who smokes, why?". Most common reasons would be either: it's unhealthy/the smell.

But if you're fine with a dipso (or being one yourself), then it's ironic.

Bad Panda

Brutal Deluxe wrote: »

You know everyone well enough in this thread to say we'd be fine with going on a date and getting hammered?

Did I say that? If I did I wasn't referring to everyone on here.

Secondly, most people who go and get drunk at the weekends wouldn't consider themselves heavy drinkers, nor would the non smokers I'm referring to (people I know).

The point I'm making is that it is a fact that there are people who say they wouldn't date a smoker yet have no problem with getting p!ssed at the weekend.

Also, that heavy drinking seems to be more socially acceptable by some people than regular smoking.

sbsquarepants

SunnyDub1 wrote: »

Again, as a smoker I wash my hair, change my clothes, and shower daily.
if a person washes their "smokey hair", "smokey face" and "smokey clothes" day in and day out it wouldn't be an issue - again another hygiene matter

You think wrong, smokers ALL smell of smoke - granted some to a greater extent than others, but you ALL smell, yourself included. Spraying perfume everytime you smoke just means by the end of the day you'll stink of perfume and smoke - hardly an improvement?

SunnyDub1 wrote: »

Not auguring that people can't smell it, but I think people like yourself, take it to an exterme... TBH I can think of a lot worse smells. Like a person who smells of sh*t or has a permanent smell of BO
That's why it's a good idea to smoke outdoors

It's honestly every bit as bad if not worse than bo, thankfully i rarely encounter people who smell of **** so i can't comment on that one!
I work in a large open plan office with about 20 other people on my floor(there's 30 windows, 13 of them open, just counted!) , when any of the smokers walk past my desk i can smell them for the next minute or so, without exception. And that's with people coming and going all day, fans on and so on. All this and i don't even have a very good sense of smell!
Face facts, you all stink!

listermint

SunnyDub1 wrote: »

This one valid point that it's do with hygine....
Maybe people aren't washing their hands after having a smoke but tbh it sounds like that pub just has a really sh*t dishwasher :rolleyes:



Again, as a smoker I wash my hair, change my clothes, and shower daily.
if a person washes their "smokey hair", "smokey face" and "smokey clothes" day in and day out it wouldn't be an issue - again another hygiene matter




Not auguring that people can't smell it, but I think people like yourself, take it to an exterme... TBH I can think of a lot worse smells. Like a person who smells of sh*t or has a permanent smell of BO



That's why it's a good idea to smoke outdoors

Right so you shower after every few cigs you have? Look they smell. Im not saying you reek of the stuff. But it smells ive been there done that and its not for me. Might be for others but smelling of cigarettes is not for me.

just like standing beside a bbq the smoke covers you head to two in seconds its not rocket science.

Tombi!

Bad Panda wrote: »

Did I say that? If I did I wasn't referring to everyone on here.

Secondly, most people who go and get drunk at the weekends wouldn't consider themselves heavy drinkers, nor would the non smokers I'm referring to (people I know).

The point I'm making is that it is a fact that there are people who say they wouldn't date a smoker yet have no problem with getting p!ssed at the weekend.

Also, that heavy drinking seems to be more socially acceptable by some people than regular smoking.

I'll quote it, then:

Bad Panda wrote: »

I suppose the people who are so vehemently against dating a smoker, would have no problem going out on first date and getting hammered, or going out with someone who's idea of fun is getting wasted every weekend.

Granted, you didn't specify you meant people in this thread. But given the fact you posted as part of the discussion, I (like most of us) assumed you were talking about the people in the thread. So my apologies for misunderstanding who you were talking about.

I'm sure there are many idiots you know and I can name a few idiots I know that spend a couple of hundred euro a week on nights out in a club and think it's a waste of money to buy a pack of cigs. But that doesn't mean anyone who's against a potential partner smoking is fine with accepting the partner to be a dipso (or being a dipso themselves).

Ficheall

Again, could someone please fix the poll so that it distinguishes between smokers and non-smokers?

Bruthal

Brutal Deluxe wrote: »

No but the connection is "you don't want to date someone who smokes, why?". Most common reasons would be either: it's unhealthy/the smell.

But if you're fine with a dipso (or being one yourself), then it's ironic.

I dont see it. Not that you were the one saying it.

I hate the smell of smoking, disgusting. I have been drunk a fair few times. Maybe I am blind, but I dont see much irony there.

Tombi!

robbie7730 wrote: »

I dont see it. Not that you were the one saying it.

I hate the smell of smoking, disgusting. I have been drunk a fair few times. Maybe I am blind, but I dont see much irony there.

Alright I'll give you two exact scenarios:

You meet me on a night out (regardless of if you drink or not). We get talking and I'm hammered. You have to put me in a cab. Then the next day we text and you ask me how I am. My reply is "hungover". I ask you if you want to go on a date again that night to the club again. You say yes and have no problem with me getting absolutely hammered and taking me safely home in a taxi again.

Same scenario as above but you find out I smoke. Because I had one smoke after a 10 hour shift at work, you don't want anything to do with me because I smoke once a day or so.

The irony is you have no problem with someone getting hammered, needing to get them in a taxi but the moment they smoke, you have an issue.

Bruthal

Bad Panda wrote: »

The point I'm making is that it is a fact that there are people who say they wouldn't date a smoker yet have no problem with getting p!ssed at the weekend.

Ok, I think the link you are making is health.

But I think myself that people who are put off by smokers, are primarily put off by the smell, and find kissing a smoker unpleasant.

Crooked Jack

Brutal Deluxe wrote: »

Alright I'll give you two exact scenarios:

You meet me on a night out (regardless of if you drink or not). We get talking and I'm hammered. You have to put me in a cab. Then the next day we text and you ask me how I am. My reply is "hungover". I ask you if you want to go on a date again that night to the club again. You say yes and have no problem with me getting absolutely hammered and taking me safely home in a taxi again.

Same scenario as above but you find out I smoke. Because I had one smoke after a 10 hour shift at work, you don't want anything to do with me because I smoke once a day or so.

The irony is you have no problem with someone getting hammered, needing to get them in a taxi but the moment they smoke, you have an issue.

There is no irony in that scenario. Smoking and drinking are two different things. Regarding the OP's question, I'd bang a smoker, even had one or two fuck buddies that smoked. But definitely couldnt go out with one.
Made my last girlfriend quit before I'd go out with her. Then when we broke up she went back on them and any lingering desire I had to get back with her dissipated the first time I saw her lighting up. Never got over someone so fast in my life. Fags are boner killers (take that sentence whatever way you like)

Jogathon

God, some people feel really strongly about this! I don't smoke, but prefer to hang out in smoking areas in clubs for the chats. I come home and have a shower in the middle of the night sometimes to get rid of the smell.

Would I date a smoker? I'd date whoever I really fancy, smoker or not, but would prefer them not to smoke.

Nulty

I'm a smoker and can say if I was a nonsmoker that I'd probably not go out with a smoker. If I fell in love with a smoker well, thats another thing altogether isn't it.

I smoke and I can tell if someoone comes in from outside after having a smoke and the smell can be really bad. You never smell it off your self, just other people.

And for sydneyfife:
No ones going to tell you that you stink of smoke if they're trying to nail you. Are they going to tell you that your hair looks bad or you have BO.

Actually thats interesting. Smokers vs Body Odour?

Bruthal

Brutal Deluxe wrote: »

Alright I'll give you two exact scenarios:

You meet me on a night out (regardless of if you drink or not). We get talking and I'm hammered. You have to put me in a cab. Then the next day we text and you ask me how I am. My reply is "hungover". I ask you if you want to go on a date again that night to the club again. You say yes and have no problem with me getting absolutely hammered and taking me safely home in a taxi again.

Same scenario as above but you find out I smoke. Because I had one smoke after a 10 hour shift at work, you don't want anything to do with me because I smoke once a day or so.

The irony is you have no problem with someone getting hammered, needing to get them in a taxi but the moment they smoke, you have an issue.

Yes, because some people hate the smell of smoke from smokers. If they find out someone smokes, they will assume they smoke like most smokers, and not one a day.

In a health way, there is a strong link, and irony if that was the reason.

But its not primarily health reasons that turns people off dating a smoker in my opinion. Its a turn off due to the bad smell, taste etc. The stink off clothes from the days when smoking was allowed in pubs is all too familiar.

whatdoicare

saiint wrote: »

do you live in dublin? if yes i bet you any money i can guess where you live...

Not everyone on boards lives in Dublin- so no, you don't know where I live. Why would that have any bearing on my drinking habits?

Crooked Jack

robbie7730 wrote: »

Ok, I think the link you are making is health.

But I think myself that people who are put off by smokers, are primarily put off by the smell, and find kissing a smoker unpleasant.

Well health is a consideration but yes, the other factors are the main ones.
Kissing a smoker is horrible. The smell is awful. Coughing and spitting is rarely attractive. Then there is the split personality, you're nice, friendly, rational partner and the pissy, moany antichrist who hasnt had her nicotine hit.
The fact that you cant watch a film or go on a journey or basically do anything that lasts for an extended period without them having to have smoke breaks.
Smoke breaks themselves piss me off. Because somebody has some filthy habit they get to take a half a dozen 10 minute breaks everyday.
Butts and ash everywhere. All the time. I dont care how neat or clean a smoker thinks they are, they inevitably end up everywhere.
Ruining the flow of conversation in a pub or restaurant because they keep getting up to go outside and suck ash.
There's loads more I cant think of right now but i lived with smokers for years and every week there would be something new about it to disgust and annoy me.
Everything about it is rank. I just couldnt go out with a smoker.

scdublin

^Yes! Smokers getting extra breaks always annoyed me so much....and the worst thing is when you go out with one friend who smokes, and they then leave you sitting like an eejit on your own while they go outside or you can join them and then lose your table!

Stiffler2

I wouldn't date anyone who didn't smoke tbh

bnt

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

Its an addiction, its not something you stop doing at the drop of a hat.

I agree, no argument there. But if you have common sense, you know it's an addiction, and do something about it. I do not accept "it's an addiction" as an excuse to keep doing it, if you have the sense to know it's bad for you and everyone around you. Some people don't have that sense, but in either case, my answer to the OP's question is still No.

Princess Peach

SunnyDub1 wrote: »

everyones posts about how it's disgusting, how it smells off your clothes, how it leaves a bad taste in your mouth :rolleyes:

I'm a strong believer that if you look after your hygiene, non of above will occur.

I smoke - but after having a smoke i will always spray some body spray/perfume on me, take a mint. I would never smoke in doors, always out doors, never smoke in my car or in my home.

It's like saying I'll never date someone who drinks because he stinks of beer, breath smells of beer and can't bare the smell of farts :rolleyes:

I'm allergic to perfume though! You're just making it worse!

And as a non smoker I can honestly say its very hard to mask, smokers just don't notice it as much.

Daveysil15

Princess Peach wrote: »

I'm allergic to perfume though! You're just making it worse!

And as a non smoker I can honestly say its very hard to mask, smokers just don't notice it as much.

I agree. I actually think perfume can make it worse.

scamalert

no ,as an ex smoker after 10y smoking, now three years clean ,wouldn't because smell is horrible especially in the car ,always have to wait till someone has a smoke before going somewhere "DOH" :cool: plus nearly tenner a packet and coughing/wheezing is no go.

Pedant

Smokers masturbate using only two fingers ... fact.

username_x

Being a smoker I would obviously have no problem dating a smoker. Before I smoked I never went out with a smoker, but that was just coincidence, not a choice. I've always seen it as a habit, just like nail biting I guess

tampopo

I voted No, but I did, once, many years ago. Never again....

Lollipops23

my oh smokes, usually only if we're having a few drinks or a night in. however, he makes a point of not doing it around me as I have chronic asthma.

It doesn't bother me a whole lot- we have an agreement that he will eventually give up though as he doesn't like the fact that he does it. He's also conscious of making sure he doesn't reek of smoke, which helps a lot. I can't abide a dirty smoker.

Madam_X

Some smokers are taking this very personally but you can't blame someone for having a preference, it's not something they can control. Smoking is a choice too, made by people who know it's bad for them. Comparing it with farts is disingenuous, and comparing it with smelling of sh1t... who the heck smells of sh1t?!
It's like they're a persecuted minority here - if fat people cried discrimination like this, they'd be laughed at.

And smoking, no matter how much attention you pay to hygiene, does make you, your clothes, your surroundings smell. It's pointless smokers themselves saying they don't think the smell is that bad - because they wouldn't would they?
Comparison with drink binging at the weekend: again, moot. Drink isn't gonna cause a constant stink in the atmosphere, on clothes and furniture, won't make kissing unpleasant daily, won't affect the other person's breathing.

I don't mind someone having the odd cig by the way, but I can see where those who hate smoking are coming from.

SarahLxx

as long as there not smoking around me i wouldn mind