Two days in the Mountjoy. Will I enjoy the experience?

AndyTheDude

Two days. 48 hours. 2880 minutes. In the Mountjoy. My first time...



Will the food be edible?

Will the bunk bed be ok enough to get at least an hour of sleep?

Will my rectum get pulverized?

Will my teeth say 'hello' to the floor?

Will I meet the guy who f***ed his own mother on the eve of the Mother's Day, a story I heard the radio today?



So many questions are going through my head right now... I have just 13 days of freedom left.

Any tips on how to survive there, obviously it's going to be really hard for me as I'm a foreigner?

Duckworth_Luas

AndyTheDude wrote: »

Any tips on how to survive there, obviously it's going to be really hard for me as I'm a foreigner?

Just abide dude!

KeithM89_old

You should watch Oz before you go, itll make you feel better.

arybvtcw0eolkf

You'll be out within the hour.

Pushtrak

Watch this, be grand...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RyCRk00Q7Dk

Mr.Crinklewood

Please refer to the Glory hole thread.

PCPhoto

what did you do to get 2 days in prison ?

with the magical system we have :rolleyes: you will be released on good behaviour (automatic remission) within a few hours !!

TheBody

What are you being locked up for?

minidazzler

2 things.

You have to go up to the biggest toughest guy and immediately knock him out. No questions, just do it, otherwise you are gonna be the bottom bitch.

The food will be edible.

crosstownk

Wine bottle corks. You'll soon discover how useful they can be.

Richard Hillman

Im sure the lads in there have seen plenty of people just in for a couple of days and then leave. Keep your head down and dont talk until spoken to.

P.S since you're a foreigner you may not know it but you will have to go to the toilet in a bucket. Dont go in hungover and eat lots of fibre

cyrusdvirus

Just walk in singing this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8pwOiC8aJrs&feature=youtube_gdata_player

Kylo Ren

"Dead man walkin' on the Green Mile"

Merkin

Have you seen Midnight Express?

arybvtcw0eolkf

Richard Hillman wrote: »

P.S since you're a foreigner you may not know it but you will have to go to the toilet in a bucket. Dont go in hungover and eat lots of fibre

You're allowed out of your cell to use the loo.

And its very unlikely a prisoner sentenced to 48hrs will do more than an hour or so before being let out on T.R.

No biggie and no need for lube.

Wattle

Two whole days? Take the Midnight Express.

Gary4279

Put a nail backwards up the rusty bullet hole

Mance Rayder

Just play PS3 and smoke weed with everyone else.

wendell borton

Take a left turn and go west.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K8elKC-DLS8

Birroc

Immediately go on hunger strike. They'll respect that.

admiralofthefleet

watch midnight express

B.A._Baracus

Liliana Broad Wheelbarrow wrote: »

You're allowed out of your cell to use the loo.

And its very unlikely a prisoner sentenced to 48hrs will do more than an hour or so before being let out on T.R.

No biggie and no need for lube.

You serious :eek:
So being sentenced to 48 hours is just... well .... utter bullsh*t. As you'll only do an hour or two.

Mance Rayder

Yeah out in an hour, I wouldn't even sit down.

Lone Stone

Ye'l be grand get a little tv in your small one bed roomed cell and an xbox to pass away the hours till lunch time when you get free food, then you can play some pool in the rec room, or go outside and play catch the parcel.

Mance Rayder

He won't even make it to a cell. He will be told to sit on a bench and wait. An hour later they will tell him to gtfo.

fryup

if you're a pretty boy, be careful who you make friends with....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wtyVvi9zD8w

PizzamanIRL

Haha 2 days suck it up and stop telling the internet about your ****.

What do you want people to say, "Oh yeah, you'll enjoy prison, of course"

Birroc

B.A._Baracus wrote: »

You serious :eek:
So being sentenced to 48 hours is just... well .... utter bullsh*t. As you'll only do an hour or two.

Yes B.A. you will only serve an hour for that crime ye did not commit.

Come in.

RHarrow

The prisons are overcrowded here so you'll most likely be brought in, sat in a cell for a short period and then released.

Just be nice to everyone you meet so they don't find a reason to keep you in and learn from the experience.

Peetrik

minidazzler wrote: »

You have to go up to the biggest toughest guy and immediately knock him out. No questions, just do it, otherwise you are gonna be the bottom bitch.

Unless you're big and tough looking... then everyone is going to try knock you out.

Dirk Gently

shower gel > soap

Immaculate Pasta

You'll love it, make some great friends, be richer for the experience and you won't want to leave :cool:.

Holsten

Like others have said, you'll be in there for a few hours at the max, they simply don't have the space to keep people.

PseudoFamous

You should get a prison tattoo and tell everyone about your time in the 'joy

christmas2012

i hear drugs are easier to get in prison apparantely ,anyway 2 days is not a long time to kick up **** or anything like that,so keep your head down dont cause any dramas dont get involved in prison gossip can be fatal - not exactly office politics :pac:

krudler

B.A._Baracus wrote: »

You serious :eek:
So being sentenced to 48 hours is just... well .... utter bullsh*t. As you'll only do an hour or two.

yup, so you shoulda thought of that before you promptly escaped into the Los Angeles underground, working as a solider for hire.

shopaholic01

krudler wrote: »

yup, so you shoulda thought of that before you promptly escaped into the Los Angeles underground, working as a solider for hire.

Soldier of fortune;)

bgrizzley

we should start a betting pool. i'll take less than one hour.

Son Of A Vidic

PCPhoto wrote: »

what did you do to get 2 days in prison ?

Answer still pending I see.

woodoo

Bring in a party pack of E's, heroin and coke for the boys. You'll go down a storm and if you are lucky extent your stay by a few years.

AndyTheDude

Thanks for the replies, very reassuring indeed. Maybe I will survive...

The Garda who visited me with an arrest warrant in his hand last night said that the whole thing will be conducted in a "very discreet manner" as long as I will show up in the local Garda Station when called in.

F**k 'em I say, I want the whole experience: a police vehicle with flashing lights in front of my house, handcuffs, maybe even a negotiator, neighbors watching me being dragged away, police sirens screaming trough the whole estate, crying kids... etc.

I cannot believe the state wastes its resources on a 'criminal' like me, especially in the current economical climate... I should've gone into estate developing business, I would enjoy a nice game of golf right now...

Richard Hillman

I hear they only have basic cable so you might want to sky plus 2 days of TV

krudler

AndyTheDude wrote: »

Thanks for the replies, very reassuring indeed. Maybe I will survive...

The Garda who visited me with an arrest warrant in his hand last night said that the whole thing will be conducted in a "very discreet manner" as long as I will show up in the local Garda Station when called in.

F**k 'em I say, I want the whole experience: a police vehicle with flashing lights in front of my house, handcuffs, maybe even a negotiator, neighbors watching me being dragged away, police sirens screaming trough the whole estate, crying kids... etc.

I cannot believe the state wastes its resources on a 'criminal' like me, especially in the current economical climate... I should've gone into estate developing business, I would enjoy a nice game of golf right now...

Whatcha do?

if you're going down make a song and dance of it, like McLovin in Superbad :pac:

Nodin

Corvus Maximus wrote: »

Answer still pending I see.

Two days? Very minor criminal damage, insulting/abusing a public servant in the course of their duties. He might well have told a bus inspector to fuck off.

My name is URL

AndyTheDude wrote: »

The Garda who visited me with an arrest warrant in his hand last night said that the whole thing will be conducted in a "very discreet manner" as long as I will show up in the local Garda Station when called in.

F**k 'em I say, I want the whole experience: a police vehicle with flashing lights in front of my house, handcuffs, maybe even a negotiator, neighbors watching me being dragged away, police sirens screaming trough the whole estate, crying kids... etc.

lol

I'm dying to know what earned you 2 days in jail. Seriously, anything that warrants 2 days in prison probably isn't worth bothering with in the first place.

Mance Rayder

Yeah what you do??

Most people get suspended sentences so you must have done something really bad to get an actual sentence.

So spill the beans! (It's the TV license isn't it?)

Nodin

AndyTheDude wrote: »

Thanks for the replies, very reassuring indeed. Maybe I will survive...

The Garda who visited me with an arrest warrant in his hand last night said that the whole thing will be conducted in a "very discreet manner" as long as I will show up in the local Garda Station when called in.

F**k 'em I say, I want the whole experience: a police vehicle with flashing lights in front of my house, handcuffs, maybe even a negotiator, neighbors watching me being dragged away, police sirens screaming trough the whole estate, crying kids... etc.

I cannot believe the state wastes its resources on a 'criminal' like me, especially in the current economical climate... I should've gone into estate developing business, I would enjoy a nice game of golf right now...

Come along now Bronson, tell us what ye did. Probably the slaggin will mostly be on the eejits for charging you......

Holsten

I'd guess non payment of a fine.

So pay like €1,000 or 2 days in the joy.

Yamanoto

It'll be like this, bit more stabby perhaps.

Mena

I suggest you get the plans of the place tatoo'd over your body, make friends with the nurse and... Well, you know the rest.

Joey the lips

Ha Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha i just copped it. He is generating publicity of his my space page...

Jasus.... I thought jordan was bad.