Farting!

ElleEm

I was standing in a shop earlier and some guy let the loudest fart, and didn't show any remorse for it. He wasn't one tiny bit embarrassed!! He could've held it in and done it out of ear (and nose!) shot of others.

I never fart in front of anyone, although my boyfriend says I let rip something fierce when I'm asleep

I just think farting is an unnecessary thing to share with others.
Do you fart in front of others? Whether it's strangers on the bus, or your partner?

vicwatson

Women don't fart, they cough in their knickers

chin_grin

This man you speak of, he deserves a high five.

kfallon

Why the social stigma with farting in the first place? Sneezing is acceptable and yet that could cause you to emit a green gooey substance in front of others!

ElleEm

kfallon wrote: »

Why the social stigma with farting in the first place? Sneezing is acceptable and yet that could cause you to emit a green gooey substance in front of others!

It comes from a bum! That place is dirty!

arybvtcw0eolkf

ElleEm wrote: »

I was standing in a shop earlier and some guy let the loudest fart

Its been reported in the Dublin City Forum.

BUBBLE WRAP

A big nice fart, clenses the soul..

Gummy Panda

Just queef him with a road warrior

kfallon

ElleEm wrote: »

It comes from a bum! That place is dirty!

My hoop is impeccably clean tyvm....and isn't your nose dirty too??? I mean would you shake hands with someone who just picked their nose?

DesertCreat_15

I dont fart in front of people, unless its a schnakey one were you cant be singled out for the blame :pac:

Tell me this, do you fart in front of your boyfriend? My other half is chronic for farting in her sleep too yet shes mortified to do it in front of me, i think shes mental, i dont have a problem with it!

ElleEm

BUBBLE WRAP wrote: »

A big nice fart, clenses the soul..

I don't disagree, but would you do it in a shop full of strangers?

gobnaitolunacy

Better an empty house than a bad lodger.

kfallon

BUBBLE WRAP wrote: »

A big nice fart, clenses the soul hole..

FYP

ElleEm

DesertCreat_15 wrote: »

I dont fart in front of people, unless its a schnakey one were you cant be singled out for the blame :pac:

Tell me this, do you fart in front of your boyfriend? My other half is chronic for farting in her sleep too yet shes mortified to do it in front of me, i think shes mental, i dont have a problem with it!

Never never never!

Although when I'm asleep I have no control so allegedly do.

He wouldn't purposely fart in front of me either though. They often slip out but he would more often leave the room, which can be hilarious, as he'll walk out to the hall, do a thunderous fart, and walk back in as if nothing has happened!!

Thatnastyboy

Analia Tinkling String wrote: »

Its been reported in the Dublin City Forum.

You bastard, I burst out laughing and got caught on boards by my boss.

BUBBLE WRAP

ElleEm wrote: »

I don't disagree, but would you do it in a shop full of strangers?

Well, Its not too bad, sure everone love their own brand.

Edit: Maybe he was holding it in since last week, You just dont know. :eek:

ScumLord

It's a natural bodily function I see no problem with it. Holding in farts can be painful at times, better out than in I say.

BraziliaNZ

MODS: I thought we were done with these types of threads? Can we close please?

kfallon

BraziliaNZ wrote: »

MODS: I thought we were done with these types of threads? Can we close please?

Would you rather another Religion thread instead....or one on unemployed people???

ejmaztec

ElleEm wrote: »

I was standing in a shop earlier and some guy let the loudest fart, and didn't show any remorse for it. He wasn't one tiny bit embarrassed!! He could've held it in and done it out of ear (and nose!) shot of others.

I never fart in front of anyone, although my boyfriend says I let rip something fierce when I'm asleep

I just think farting is an unnecessary thing to share with others.
Do you fart in front of others? Whether it's strangers on the bus, or your partner?

Do you fart behind people and blame them for the stench?

BraziliaNZ

kfallon wrote: »

Would you rather another Religion thread instead....or one on unemployed people???

Yes! Jesus do we really need to talk about this? I just had lunch for God's sake.

BUBBLE WRAP

BraziliaNZ wrote: »

MODS: I thought we were done with these types of threads? Can we close please?

You dont have to hold that fart in untill the tread gets closed. Let it out.

KeithM89_old

BraziliaNZ wrote: »

Yes! Jesus do we really need to talk about this? I just had lunch for God's sake.

Dont like it, dont read it.

ScumLord

BraziliaNZ wrote: »

Yes! Jesus do we really need to talk about this? I just had lunch for God's sake.

It's breakfast time back home.

BraziliaNZ

KeithM89 wrote: »

Dont like it, dont read it.

The subject of the thread is in AH I can't avoid seeing that word, I thought we were done with this type of rubbish in AH and I'd like it stay that way

gobnaitolunacy

No need to kick up a stink.

kfallon

BraziliaNZ wrote: »

Yes! Jesus do we really need to talk about this? I just had lunch for God's sake.

Jaysus you must be extremely squeamish!
Once the lunch kicks in you'll prob be there farting away like an orchestra tuning up for the big performance :P

KeithM89_old

BraziliaNZ wrote: »

I thought we were done with this type of rubbish in AH and I'd like it stay that way

Ah well.

emul8ter25

I am not allowed to fart anywhere in my house or the wife gives out to me. Even in the bathroom, if she can hear it, Im in trouble...

Which backfires on her. I figure if im getting in trouble, I might as well let rip in front of her.

Roger Sterling

Better a vacancy than a bad tenant I say. Let rip.

gobnaitolunacy

I prefer crop dusting, harder to trace.

Jester252

Don't know how some people can get offended by them.

ElleEm

Jester252 wrote: »

Don't know how some people can get offended by them.

I don't get offended by them, I just think it's disgusting to let off a horrible smell around other people.

gobnaitolunacy

Mine come in Pot Pourri, Lemon and Alpine Fresh.

Lisandro

kfallon wrote: »

My hoop is impeccably clean tyvm....and isn't your nose dirty too??? I mean would you shake hands with someone who just picked their nose?

I would much rather shake hands with someone who has just picked their nose than someone who has had their finger up their anus.

Agricola

Only the immediate family, otherwise no way. Was on a packed Luas monday morning after a night on the tear. I was desperate to let rip a big dirty Guinness fart but knew from earlier on that morning that the result would not be pleasant. So I took one for the team and held in it til my stop, at which time I unleashed hell.

kfallon

Lisandro wrote: »

I would much rather shake hands with someone who has just picked their nose than someone who has had their finger up their anus.

Yeah but it's a lot more common to find people with a finger up their nose than up their bum? I mean some people clear snot by picking it *shudders* but just cos you need to fart you don't stick a finger up the ould chocolate fudge canal!

Lisandro

kfallon wrote: »

Yeah but it's a lot more common to find people with a finger up their nose than up their bum? I mean some people clear snot by picking it *shudders* but just cos you need to fart you don't stick a finger up the ould chocolate fudge canal!

Well, I would still find the odour worse, it's a lot more, you know, mentally penetrating than residues of snot.

B.A._Baracus

ElleEm wrote: »

I don't get offended by them, I just think it's disgusting to let off a horrible smell around other people.

It is a rude thing to do in front of random people. :pac:

Its like picking your nose as someone talks to you or burying your hand down your pants, feeling the balls of yourelf while talking to the person at a till :pac:

The word manners comes to mind, lol.

jester77

ElleEm wrote: »

I was standing in a shop earlier and some guy let the loudest fart, and didn't show any remorse for it. He wasn't one tiny bit embarrassed!! He could've held it in and done it out of ear (and nose!) shot of others.

I never fart in front of anyone, although my boyfriend says I let rip something fierce when I'm asleep

I just think farting is an unnecessary thing to share with others.
Do you fart in front of others? Whether it's strangers on the bus, or your partner?

Better out than in. Would have been much worse if he internally combusted and splattered everywhere from holding it in!

ElleEm

jester77 wrote: »

Better out than in. Would have been much worse if he internally combusted and splattered everywhere from holding it in!

Ah he would have lived! Sure I spend my days holding farts in and I never exploded.

i71jskz5xu42pb

Flatophiles* are in high company

None other than James Joyce wrote:

At every fúck I gave you your shameless tongue came bursting out through your lips and if a gave you a bigger stronger fúck than usual, fat dirty farts came spluttering out of your backside. You had an arse full of farts that night, darling, and I fúcked them out of you, big fat fellows, long windy ones, quick little merry cracks and a lot of tiny little naughty farties ending in a long gush from your hole. It is wonderful to fúck a farting woman when every fúck drives one out of her. I think I would know Nora's fart anywhere. I think I could pick hers out in a roomful of farting women. It is a rather girlish noise not like the wet windy fart which I imagine fat wives have. It is sudden and dry and dirty like what a bold girl would let off in fun in a school dormitory at night. I hope Nora will let off no end of her farts in my face so that I may know their smell also.

* May not be a cromulent word

kfallon

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R6dm9rN6oTs

uch

BUBBLE WRAP wrote: »

A big nice fart, clenses the soul..

And sometimes the Hole

BUBBLE WRAP

uch wrote: »

And sometimes the Hole

Try all the time.

Real Life

I never fart, i have no hole in my arse

thereitisgone

Real Life wrote: »

I never fart, i have no hole in my arse

Your full of sh1t

Muckit

I good fart always cheers me up. Sometimes I laugh even when I'm on my own....

Captain Darling

ElleEm wrote: »

I just think farting is an unnecessary thing to share with others.
Do you fart in front of others? Whether it's strangers on the bus, or your partner?

Clean out your spanx honey. Sometimes a man has gotten to unload one primed in the chamber.

I was passing through Lucan the other day on the way into town on important company business. Felt like i was going to be caught short so headed into Courtneys to use the well appointed facilities in there.

Nodded to Magda, the cleaner, on the way in and headed straight to stall number one in the gents. Sat down, squeezed off a solid coil off the back board, thick and tubular, no follow through. Grade A bowel movement to be fair.

Mid squeeze, there was a commotion outside and i heard someone burst into stall number two which was followed by a series of farts that could be heard out in the lounge i'd wager. Fcuking fent off it would strip varnish.

I cleaned the towel holder and pulled up my kacks, gave Magda a two euro tip and directed her to the 'war zone' when i was on the way out...

emul8ter25

Kenny vs. Spenny, Season 4 episode 2, "Who can blow the biggest fart"

Funniest thing I have ever seen.

kfallon

Captain Darling wrote: »

Clean out your spanx honey. Sometimes a man has gotten to unload one primed in the chamber.

I was passing through Lucan the other day on the way into town on important company business. Felt like i was going to be caught short so headed into Courtneys to use the well appointed facilities in there.

Nodded to Magda, the cleaner, on the way in and headed straight to stall number one in the gents. Sat down, squeezed off a solid coil off the back board, thick and tubular, no follow through. Grade A bowel movement to be fair.

Mid squeeze, there was a commotion outside and i heard someone burst into stall number two which was followed by a series of farts that could be heard out in the lounge i'd wager. Fcuking fent off it would strip varnish.

I cleaned the towel holder and pulled up my kacks, gave Magda a two euro tip and directed her to the 'war zone' when i was on the way out...

You must be one of Flutt's apostles!