Advice

LegacyUser

Ok so my girlfriend and i have decided to start trying for a baby.

I am not looking for medical advice on here more a bit of advice from people who know better on the situation.

We have been trying about a month or two and shes coming up to her period due date this week and by looks of things that will go ahead as usual.

Where just an average mid twenty's couple shes not taking anything to enhance the chances or taking any other extra steps because to be honest as far as we both know there's no need just yet its early days??

Her period date changes from month to month some months its later then others so shes unsure how to work out when is the right time to conceive.

We have just being trying as much as we both get the chance to and hopefully things will work out from there.

For a young couple who aint loaded by any means and want to keep this issue to ourselfs for now whats the best way to address the whole situation that gives us the highest chance??

Sorry if im posting this here and shouldn't be im just looking for advice a lot of the stuff online is way over my head.

dublinlady

On phone so excuse short response!!

Count days between periods rather than by date - I.e day one is first day of period. You generally ( very generally) ovulate 14 days before period due - therefore on day 14 of cycle. If 29 day cycle then day 15 etc.
About day 8/9 start 'trying' every second day until about day 20! Or more if ya like!
Tell herself to take folic acid supplement as recommended to take 3 months prior to pregnancy.
Use soerm friendly lube if needed e.g preseed.
She can also chart her cervical mucus - egg white consistency indicates ovulation within next day or 2... Gross I know
Good to have all this cycle length/ mucus info for down the rd if ye do need help!
Enjoy the process and best of luck!!

clappyhappy

Agree with Dublinlady, and as stated tell ur girlfriend to start folic acid tablets straight away. They can be bought over the counter in any pharmacy.
Take your time, relax and don't get stressed out if it doesn't happen straight away , stress is often a factor in not conceiving. Best of luck.

seamus

Yep, as said above. Folic acid pretty much straight away (don't leave the bottle out, you never know who'll see it )

If she doesn't have a diary, she should get one and make a note of the first day of her period each time. Then you'll be able to get an idea of her average cycle length. Many women don't go like clockwork and will vary by a few days each time.

As dublinlady says, wait until a couple of days after her period has finished - around day 7 or 8 and then have sex every second day. Every second day is recommended because it takes 24-48 hours to regenerate the "best" batch of sperm each time, but that's about as technical as you need to get at the early stages. You can have sex every day if you're so inclined, your sperm will still work fine

If you get too technical and start measuring body temperature and mucous levels and such, many women find this quite stressful and turns it into a chore, when in reality it should be fun.

Squiggler

There are tools and apps that can be useful for tracking your cycle and which will then offer predicted most fertile days based on the accumulated data. I used one called FMC (on iphone/ipod). It was free.

And yes, folic acid (a good prenatal multivitamin might be worthwhile too) supplement is a good idea. You should both try to eat and drink as healthily as possible and the usual advice is to cut back on or cut out smoking and booze (if you do either).

Even with no physical problems it can take a while to conceive... not always, we've all heard stories of people who conceive straight away... but often. The longer a couple are together the better their chances according to some people. It took my husband and me over a year.

I also think it is really important to focus on the fun and not on the TTC... when we were TRYING nothing was happening, and we both got a bit stressed. Then we talked and decided that if we couldn't have children of our own it would be ok and we'd still be happy and fulfilled. We conceived that month.

LegacyUser

Thanks everyone for the replys :-)

I find that she tends to get stressed out over the whole planning of everything and when it gets technical if you get me.

Where trying to just take things easy and not get stressed out but even at this early stage it can just feel like its not meant to be.

I guess you get used to trying to protect yourself from not getting someone pregnant for so long u think as soon as u stop its just gonna happen!!

When theres so many people around u with new born babys and who are pregnant it can also stress you out ya start to feel like your doing something wrong.

pwurple

It takes a bit of time time. There are a few websites that will calculate your fertile days. Google ovulation calendars.

If her cycles are not regular in the first place, then there may be something causing that, like polycystic ovaries. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polycystic_ovary_syndrome