Heaven.

kneemos

What do you do all day when you get there.

hondasam

Look down at all the people burning in hell.

christmas2012

its like a kind of limbo i think but theres loads of cool stuff like entertainment there when you get up there,all your favourite things and you never put on weight..

feel smug

kfallon

Log onto hww.boards.ie

CavanCrew

https://twitter.com/jesus/

Rabies

kneemos wrote: »

What do you do all day when you get there.

Play Guess Who with all the other imaginary people

Fizman

christmas2012 wrote: »

its like a kind of limbo i think but theres loads of cool stuff like entertainment there when you get up there,all your favourite things and you never put on weight..

What if one of your favourite things happens to be putting on weight?

Do you just explode?

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

selena gomez

I'll probably get turned away.

crazy cabbage

Time would not exist :eek:

AnonoBoy

Cloud goes up.
Cloud goes down.

mauzo

Fap

Latchy

Place sounds boring as Hell ....

Fluorescence

Count water droplets in clouds, or something. Seems terribly boring to be hanging around for all eternity.

Littlehorny

Better be able to shag or i'm not going!

the_syco

Day trips to earth.

Rabies

the_syco wrote: »

Day trips to earth.

Dress code is a white sheet.

Littlehorny

the_syco wrote: »

Day trips to earth.

Now that would be cool! As long as you can pick where and who.

ITS_A_BADGER

we're all goin to heaven lads wahey!

Rabies

Rabies wrote: »

Dress code is a white sheet.

Woohoo wet sheet competitions

Real Life

look down on the people in hell having fun, chilling with the devil. doing drugs and nasty ****. i cant wait to get to hell. **** is gonna be tight yo.

TeddyTedson

Kick seven shades of ****e out of Jesus.

Scioch

Whatever ya want I suppose, isnt it like the holodeck on Star Trek ?

dlofnep

Have sex with lots of virgins, what else?

hondasam

TeddyTedson wrote: »

Kick seven shades of ****e out of Jesus.

why would you do that?

Dangerous Man

hondasam wrote: »

why would you do that?

Because he's a holier than thou, pontificating prick. Who does he think he is anyway?

Scioch

Dangerous Man wrote: »

Because he's a holier than thou, pontificating prick. Who does he think he is anyway?

Be careful, I hear his old man is a pretty big deal down the old cracker factory.

Daveysil15

Have sex with 72 virgins. It's something I've often thought about though. Wouldn't you just get bored getting what you want all the time? And what about people of other religions? Do they all go to hell because they haven't chosen the right one?

3ndahalfof6

silent tap dancing.

hondasam

Dangerous Man wrote: »

Because he's a holier than thou, pontificating prick. Who does he think he is anyway?

Teddy is not that bad.

Unavailable for Comment

Daveysil15 wrote: »

Have sex with 72 virgins.

I've always thought that was unfair really. Like some Nun dies after years of devoted service and gets sent straight to heaven. Ah, she's so happy to be there. Smiling, looking forward to seeing friends and family that have passed on. Chilling, drinking a cup of ambrosia!

Sees God. "Hey God, nice place!" "Ahem, yes," he mutters awkwardly, "I'm going to need you to go over there . . . To that, er, garden."

"You mean the garden where those angels are stripping women and holding them down for that man," she asks?

"Em, yes. . . if you could. . . oh and welcome to Heaven!"

ART6

So Paddy dies and arrives at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter lets him and and offers to show him around. Nearby are a group of people wearing turbans and nightdresses, and Paddy asks "Who are they?"

"They? Oh they're Muslims."

A bit further on and another group sitting around a fat sculpture and chanting. "Er...Who are they?"

"Them? Oh they're Buddhists."

Turning a corner they pass by the high walls of what looks almost like a medieval fortress. "What in the name O'God goes on in there?" Asks Paddy.

"There? Oh, they're Catholics. They think they're the only ones here!"

DesperateDan

I don't want to go to heaven

Daveysil15

Unavailable for Comment wrote: »

I've always thought that was unfair really. Like some Nun dies after years of devoted service and gets sent straight to heaven. Ah, she's so happy to be there. Smiling, looking forward to seeing friends and family that have passed on. Chilling, drinking a cup of ambrosia!

Sees God. "Hey God, nice place!" "Ahem, yes," he mutters awkwardly, "I'm going to need you to go over there . . . To that, er, garden."

"You mean the garden where those angels are stripping women and holding them down for that man," she asks?

"Em, yes. . . if you could. . . oh and welcome to Heaven!"

Yes one man's dream is another man's nightmare, so how exaclty would heaven facilitate everyone? And what would happen to a female suicide bomber? It would probably be better to be killed by a female suicide bomber. You might get killed by a flying tit! :pac:

Scuid Mhór

I guess it's like going to sleep and never waking up.

wendell borton

... up there with our Lord and Stalin and Bob Marley....

Lawrence1895

I might work as a pilot, trying to bring the plane down without any major incident

whatdoicare

Heaven wouldn't work at all in reality - humans are annoying creatures that have a deep need to always want more and to want what we can't have. We're also destructive b*st**ds. We'd all be deeply unhappy living in a place where all our needs are met - sounds boring.

aaronjumper

whatdoicare wrote: »

Heaven wouldn't work at all in reality - humans are annoying creatures that have a deep need to always want more and to want what we can't have. We're also destructive b*st**ds. We'd all be deeply unhappy living in a place where all our needs are met - sounds boring.

Daveysil15 wrote: »

Have sex with 72 virgins. It's something I've often thought about though. Wouldn't you just get bored getting what you want all the time? And what about people of other religions? Do they all go to hell because they haven't chosen the right one?

Never underestimate the selfishness of the other guy

Getting everything I ever wanted, whenever I wanted, for eternity? Sweet.

whatdoicare

aaronjumper wrote: »

Never underestimate the selfishness of the other guy

Getting everything I ever wanted, whenever I wanted, for eternity? Sweet.

It'd be fantastic for a little while and then it just won't do it for you anymore - like waiting all year for the newest Xbox and when you finally get it, it's sweet as and you can't get away from it for days on end but after a while it's lost it's awesomeness and you go online to find out when the newest DS is gonna be coming out.

uch

I'd mastebate ferociously, cause i'm already there and it means me mammy was wrong!

aaronjumper

whatdoicare wrote: »

It'd be fantastic for a little while and then it just won't do it for you anymore - like waiting all year for the newest Xbox and when you finally get it, it's sweet as and you can't get away from it for days on end but after a while it's lost it's awesomeness and you go online to find out when the newest DS is gonna be coming out.

Not true I still love my xbox and I am incredibly selfish! Also DS sucks and would not be in my Heaven.

whatdoicare

aaronjumper wrote: »

Not true I still love my xbox and I am incredibly selfish! Also DS sucks and would not be in my Heaven.

Well, can't argue with that - have fun. The selfish thing will probably keep you out of heaven though - ironic, no?


BTW I just realised you keep telling me you're selfish, I'm not sure why or what that's got to do with anything I've said?

aaronjumper

whatdoicare wrote: »

Well, can't argue with that - have fun. The selfish thing will probably keep you out of heaven though - ironic, no?

Oh it won't be selfishness that keeps me out of heaven, trust me. . .

That said the irony is still delicious thank you

whatdoicare

aaronjumper wrote: »

That said the irony is still delicious thank you

um.... okily dokily neighbourino

Wereghost

An eternity of Sunday afternoons, with the only prospect of real change being a one-way ticket out through making some faux pas or other? Sounds like torture of a sort.

dodderangler

In heaven I'd start playing knock-a-dolly on gods front door
Haha

kowloon

Couldn't think of anything worse than an eternity of anything.
I couldn't even eat for an eternity, and eating is my favorite thing to do.
I plan on eating myself to death just the once. Of course that would be gluttony.

TeddyTedson

hondasam wrote: »

TeddyTedson wrote: »

Kick seven shades of ****e out of Jesus.

why would you do that?

Social experiment to see if he really would forgive me.

After that I haunt that Shiite out of TDs in the Dáil.

Jester252

Spend all the time thinking what to do