50 Shades of Grey Phenomenom?!

smash

syndeyfife wrote: »

Not for long.....

I might get the audio book and fast forward like I would with any decent porno.

kfallon

Hardonraging wrote: »

You're clearly talking to the wrong paedophiles so ..

And you know the right paedos???

Hardonraging

smash wrote: »

I might get the audio book and fast forward like I would with any decent porno.

2 hours in 2 mins .. the best 2 mins tho !!

mauzo

kfallon wrote: »

And you know the right paedos???

You have him there

Hardonraging

kfallon wrote: »

And you know the right paedos???

Never box above your weight kido ...

Hardonraging

Hardonraging wrote: »

2 hours in 2 mins .. the best 2 mins tho !!

is that what you tell the ladies

Hardonraging

bluewolf wrote: »

is that what you tell the ladies

2mins of action then change angle ...;);)

smash

bluewolf wrote: »

is that what you tell the ladies

Ah here love, were you lying on my fast forward button again?

K-9

bluewolf wrote: »

is that what you tell the ladies

Here for a good time, not a long time.

mauzo

K-9 wrote: »

Here for a good time, not a long time.

Quality over quantity!

daisybelle2008

Few more funny online reviews:

http://redlemonade.blogspot.com/2012/06/fifty-shades-of-tedious-****ery-vol-1.html

http://www.snarksquad.com/category/ruinedforlife/page/2

swimming in a sea

smash wrote: »

No, she's only 21. And she's a virgin!

well then how does she even know if the sex is any good, your man could be some anorak wearing train spotter who is just talking the big talk since he knows she has not been broken in yet

pickarooney

Hardonraging wrote: »

2mins of action then change angle ...;);)

Sounds like snooker.

pickarooney

pickarooney wrote: »

Sounds like snooker.

cue jokes about cues :pac:

--Kaiser--

..and pot the pot the pink, pot the brown, velvet cushions, balls etc....

smash

--Kaiser-- wrote: »

..and pot the pot the pink, pot the brown, velvet cushions, balls etc....

potting the brown before the pink may result in serious infections... but thems the rules of snooker!

Diapason

Choosing between the easy pink or the tight brown?

Hardonraging

bluewolf wrote: »

cue jokes about cues :pac:

I never like to go for the easy options ;)

Hardonraging

Hardonraging wrote: »

I never like to go for the easy options ;)

but they might be more forgiving of your 2 min inclinations :pac:

Hardonraging

bluewolf wrote: »

but they might be more forgiving of your 2 min inclinations :pac:

You gotta keep it fresh, hense the angle change every 2 mins.... if you rub a spot constantly it'll get worn out...

smash

Hardonraging wrote: »

You gotta keep it fresh, hense the angle change every 2 mins.... if you rub a spot constantly it'll get worn out...

Na, my bits are still there!

Lavidabonita

I just read 50 shades of grey and I can honestly say it is THE WORST book I have ever read. Actually it is HORRIFIC. My baby sister could write a more interesting, better written novel. Before I even talk about the plot, the author clearly can't even write. Her writing is actually shameful. Terrible. As a woman, I am in shock that other women actually even like this. HAVE YOU NO RESPECT FOR YOURSELVES?? The only people that seem to even enjoy this book are those that don't normally pick up a book.

Anyway, apologies for the rant but I feel it was necessary! If anyone is even thinking about buying this book, or borrowing from the library, DON'T!! Save your money and bus fare and don't waste your time !!

Hardonraging

Lavidabonita wrote: »

I just read 50 shades of grey and I can honestly say it is THE WORST book I have ever read. Actually it is HORRIFIC. My baby sister could write a more interesting, better written novel. Before I even talk about the plot, the author clearly can't even write. Her writing is actually shameful. Terrible. As a woman, I am in shock that other women actually even like this. HAVE YOU NO RESPECT FOR YOURSELVES?? The only people that seem to even enjoy this book are those that don't normally pick up a book.

Anyway, apologies for the rant but I feel it was necessary! If anyone is even thinking about buying this book, or borrowing from the library, DON'T!! Save your money and bus fare and don't waste your time !!

Perhaps if you were to be introduced to a set of handcuffs and a buttplug you're view may change to a more ... opening minded one ?

I believe the book's under tone is where the attraction is, not it's grammar, although it seems the grammar and content are the lest of your worries..

The Snipe

Just saw this posted on facebook, had to screenshot it.

http://oi46.tinypic.com/15mecmg.jpg

I remember when i was about 11 or 12 reading my big sisters copy of Jilly Coopers "Riders".
I thought it was a porn mag lol

Borboletinha

Terrible book, painful to read really... Im struggling to finish the first one and theres no way I'll waste time with the sequels...


Having said that, I'll also say that Christian Grey is oh soooo hot!!! Im hoping Chris Hemsworth(Thor) will play him in the movie...:cool:


Any woman who says she wouldnt like to sleep with a man whos beautiful, rich and good in bed is lying through her teeth... and the sales of this piece of crap book prove that.

Diapason

Borboletinha wrote: »

Any woman who says she wouldnt like to sleep with a man whos beautiful, rich and good in bed is lying through her teeth

I always suspected, but it hurts to see it written down.

smash

Borboletinha wrote: »

Having said that, I'll also say that Christian Grey is oh soooo hot!!!
...
Any woman who says she wouldnt like to sleep with a man whos beautiful, rich and good in bed is lying through her teeth...

But his looks and how good he is in bed are subjective. You're taking the word of a 21yr old virgin!

AnonoBoy

This started life as Twilight porno-fan-fiction didn't it? No wonder it's a badly written piece of crap.

mauzo

Hardonraging wrote: »

You gotta keep it fresh, hense the angle change every 2 mins.... if you rub a spot constantly it'll get worn out...

You can be the boards Christian Grey then........


:rolleyes:

Hardonraging

syndeyfife wrote: »

You can be the boards Christian Grey then........


:rolleyes:

Can be ??? thinking in the past there are we

mauzo

Hardonraging wrote: »

Can be ??? thinking in the past there are we

Suits you perfectly.....moody pr*ck :rolleyes:

Madam_X

Haven't read it. Any reviews I've read, the Grey guy seems like a prick.

Hardonraging wrote: »

Perhaps if you were to be introduced to a set of handcuffs and a buttplug you're view may change to a more ... opening minded one ?

I believe the book's under tone is where the attraction is, not it's grammar, although it seems the grammar and content are the lest of your worries..

I don't agree with that poster's "Have you any respect for yourselves" comment (it's just a book) but she gives no indication that she's sexually uptight. Also, buttplug - is that one of those things people are supposed to say they enjoy using, so as not to seem prudish?

Borboletinha wrote: »

Any woman who says she wouldnt like to sleep with a man whos beautiful, rich and good in bed is lying through her teeth... and the sales of this piece of crap book prove that.

Once he's not a self absorbed, obnoxious, mentally and emotionally unstable dick like. That's quite a turn-off.

Ficheall

A few of us are heading to Oughterard tomorrow and renting a couple of row boats and heading out on the Corrib for a picnic, taking a copy of 50 shades along to keep us entertained. It probably won't be quite as intellectually stimulating as Flann O Brien and Lewis Carroll the previous weeks, but if any boardsies would like to come along, you're more than welcome!

kfallon

Amuse yourselves

http://www.fiftyshadesgenerator.com/

:P

mauzo

kfallon wrote: »

Amuse yourselves

http://www.fiftyshadesgenerator.com/

:P

he then f*cked my mavis fritter.....

that link is gas!! lol

kfallon

syndeyfife wrote: »

he then f*cked my mavis fritter.....

that link is gas!! lol

i knew you'd like it

"Marmite Motorway"

mauzo

kfallon wrote: »

i knew you'd like it

"Marmite Motorway"

hahahah Ive seen more helmets than hitler, he munched on my purple cabbage....

Sweet mother of f*ck what have you got me reading!! :eek:

kfallon

syndeyfife wrote: »

hahahah Ive seen more helmets than hitler, he munched on my purple cabbage....

Sweet mother of f*ck what have you got me reading!! :eek:

You will be using them all as chat up lines in the future

I have saved it to my favourites

Giselle

kfallon wrote: »

Amuse yourselves

http://www.fiftyshadesgenerator.com/

:P

I actually cried laughing!

''Is this the time to tell him I need to launch a toilet twinkie? I began sweating like a midget nun at a penguin shoot...''

So much better than the original

kfallon

My turgid wang operator traced a path to her stamped bat which was by now, wetter than a sp@st1cs chin

I was so wet, anyone would think my waters had broken. My sardine slit was frothing & squirting like a clowns flower.

Giselle

kfallon wrote: »

My turgid wang operator traced a path to her stamped bat which was by now, wetter than a sp@st1cs chin

I was so wet, anyone would think my waters had broken. My sardine slit was frothing & squirting like a clowns flower.

Its the most disgusting, funniest, over-the-top thing I've read in a long time.

My boss keeps asking me what I'm laughing at, and I linked him 'Text from Dog'

mauzo

My vaginal bacon buffet was trembling like Muhammad Ali on a tumble dryer

Axe Rake

Inserting a cucumber into my cock holster got me surging minge mucus faster than a greased weasel ****. It was bliss having his devil's bagpipe plunged inside me again; stuffing my moose knuckle with barbie doll just didn't get my stench trench spouting like it used to.

grindle

There was love mayonaisse sliming from his greasy slimelight and I was wetter than a spastic's chin.

Hardonraging

This makes my penis sad ....

mauzo

Hardonraging wrote: »

This makes my penis sad ....

Change of username required?

Hardonraging

syndeyfife wrote: »

Change of username required?

Hordly !!

grindle

Hardonwaning.

hadepsx

this fecking book is the scourge of me, the missus is trying to turn me into Mr.Grey. well i aint no billionaire, and she definitly aint no virgin.:D
i do enjoy the new activities i must admit:pac: