Roadkill.

Pottler

gammygils wrote: »

A crow or a jackdaw whichever,(it was black) ploughed into my windscreen one morning
Left a right bloody mess. Big bang! Frightened the bejaysus outa me at the time. I was passing a graveyard at the time
Thankfully I never killed an animal

Because, obviously, Crows are ....

Uriel.

Pottler wrote: »

what was the deer driving? My guess is a Triumph Stag.

lol

no, he was wandering onto the right from the passenger side. It was pitch bloody dark and its eyes lit up. It just stopped dead, a very slight change of course for me and I managed to avoid him. Had he kept strutting along, there was no hope.

cocoshovel

Have hit a Pheasant, and nearly have hit a dog, cat, badger, rabbit, fox, and a few more small animals.
But luckily I tend to reamain calm in those kind of situations, unlike my mother (terrible driver) who screams, swerves, and covers her eyes.

I abuse the ****e out of he when she does it as it downright dangerous and annoying. She did it last week on the motorway because of a squirrel. She SLAMS on the brakes if a bird were fly too close to the windscreen. It drives me mad, she cant react to save anything.

One night we were coming home from town, and I noticed a flock of sheep in the field beside the road (as you do), I immedately became suspicious because the wall was very low and crumbled, at the exact same time as I was thinking "I hope one doesnt get out on the road", one jumped right out in front of our car.
My idiot mother swerved into the wrong lane on a blind bend immediately, but the sheep got a fairly hard wack on the head.
He was still walking when we looking in the mirror so we continued on :pac:

A few weeks ago I was driving at night, when I noticed something moving on the side of the road. I slowed down thinking it was a dog or something, but no it was a little rabbit. I was only doing 50km in a quiet area so I brough the car to a stop while the rabbit ran rings in front of my car in a desperate panic. He didnt have anywhere to go due to the fencing on either side of the road.

Pottler

We were going over the wicklow gap one night, it was bogging down with snow, a deer ran out in front of the jeep and I swerved, err, a bit. The jeep came to a stop hanging over the edge of a severe drop down into the valley near where they filmed "Reign of Fire". I no longer swerve for things that step out in front of me, unless they are blonde.

Uriel.

Pottler wrote: »

We were going over the wicklow gap one night, it was bogging down with snow, a deer ran out in front of the jeep and I swerved, err, a bit. The jeep came to a stop hanging over the edge of a severe drop down into the valley near where they filmed "Reign of Fire". I no longer swerve for things that step out in front of me, unless they are blonde.

Holy Crap:eek::eek::eek::eek:

That must have been a scary few moments...

hedzball

Lil silka jumped out in front of me one night on a main road in kildare.. I was up for a job interview at the time. Was on the 2 wheel horse doing well close on double the limit trying to get home handy..

passed in front of me.. I hit the anchors.. about a foot in it id say..


have prob killed a dozen odd foxes and a few bunnys .. i try to save the bugs mind..

One less fox really isnt a bad thing..

gammygils

Pottler wrote: »

Because, obviously, Crows are ....

....... Birds.....
.........Black....

Rich11

hit a rabbit on the m7 once:( going around 140k/ph, broke the fog light which i fixed and the lip on the front bumper which is a little loose still:(,
by the time i seen him a couldnt do anything and then...bang.

and a few weeks ago was on the m50 a suicidal bird flew right towards my windscreen:eek:, and swooped up just in time, gave me a real brown trouser moment:o

FanadMan

Was driving an old Land Rover a few years ago. Was only toodling along and came round a blind bend and ended up hitting a young deer. Was at night so couldn't help but hit it.

Got out to check it but it was dead. My passenger was a decent hunter and had a knife with him so out he got and gutted and skinned it. Talk about beautiful meat! Well, it was dead and seemed a waste to leave it. So def a good result for road kill.

xzanti

I hit a pigeon one morning, I just saw a big POOF of feathers flying up from the bumper.. I felt horrible for the whole day.. My OH had to go out and clean the carnage off the bumper

RIP Goodfeather.

gobnaitolunacy

A Jack Russell (didn't see him, car coming opp. direction dazzled me) and a sheep (crossed road at last min and got lamed)

Wonder why ppl don't stop and chuck anything they nailed over the hedge instead of just leaving it there? Disgusting. Loads of foxes dead on the road in country places, would surprise me if it was deliberate.

mauzo

gobnaitolunacy wrote: »

A Jack Russell (didn't see him, car coming opp. direction dazzled me) and a sheep (crossed road at last min and got lamed)

Wonder why ppl don't stop and chuck anything they nailed over the hedge instead of just leaving it there? Disgusting.

Im not being a smart arse but that made me laugh. You hit someones family pet, described it as nailing him, and then chucked him somewhere. And the people who hit things and drive off are disgusting!

gobnaitolunacy

I sort of meant wild animals, Re the Jack Russell, I knew the dogs owner. Curiously enough he wanted me to get rid of his dog a few weeks before and I refused.
Ironic.

Got a small bird unknownst to me, only when I lifted the bonnet I found him wedged by the headlamp.

gobnaitolunacy

I could have phrased that a bit better, I'll admit...

mauzo

gobnaitolunacy wrote: »

I could have phrased that a bit better, I'll admit...

No I wasnt having a go, I genuinely laughed when I read it!

Plazaman

Sky King wrote: »

OK rough story, so dont read if you like animals.

Note: I actually like animals a lot (especially ducks) and so I feel particularly bad about this.......

I too murdered a Duck family once on a Quad Bike. Lovely Summers morning, quiet narrow country lane and I don't think I was going that fast either. Came around a corner there was Mammy Duck and six or seven ducklings waddling down the middle of road. Took me a couple of seconds to register as I only seen Mammy duck, the others somehow blended into the road. Unfortunatley by the time my massacre was over, they were well blended into the road as by swerving to avoid them I ran straight over them. I took out 4 outright and one was paralysed (well was alive but not moving....what do I look like a Vet?).

I was in tears. To this day, I can still hear the quacking and crunching sounds. Oh the horror! Mammy duck went postal on me too (well seemed that way) and paranoia set in as I swore I could hear other ducks in the distance coming that way probably to gang up on me and get revenge. I hightailed it out of there on the Quad covered with bits of duck and tears still in my eyes. Never been on a bike since.

Beefy78

I remember I hit a fox once. Yes, in the Peak District. I remember seeing the reflection in its eyes just before I hit it. It was too late, of course.

But I didn’t kill it, that was the tragedy, I had to go back and finish him off with a jack.

Sky King

Alan Partridge?

gobnaitolunacy

AngryHippie wrote: »

Roos are stoopid

Possums/wallabies are worse. Driving a hire car through the wilds of tasmania at night, literally streams of critters crossing the roads. Never seen anything like it. Bricking it that one would end up plastered on the front of the Yaris and have to pay for damage.

eth0

One day going home I seen a pidgeon infront of me. Looked in the mirror and saw a cubic metre of pidgeon feathers in the air behind me

kingtut

syndeyfife wrote: »

This reminded me of the time I was going to lunch with a friend of mine. I got to his house and there was a dead fox on the road. Off we went out for lunch, we were pulling back into his driveway and there was the dead dog in his plants!! Someone had just taken it off the road and thrown it over his hedge!!!

...and how exactly did it transform from a fox into to a dog
Must be a magic hedge :pac:

mongdesade

Nom, nom, nom

Odysseus

Yeah I hunt so if I come across fresh road kill yeah. I was doing about 100-20 over a hill close by to my house. Seen a slight movement to my right, a pheasant flew right into my handlebars levers, gutted itself on my clutch lever, smashing into my chest. I left its guts all over my chest, clutch was at a right angle. However, no harm done and yeah I like pheasant so I had it.

Flaker

A pigeon hit my windscreen and rolled over the roof and also hit the car behind me.

The dude behind me started beeping like mad - like I'd thrown the bird at him or something!

Left a big smudge on my windscreen to remind me of it's demise....

CruelCoin

I swerve to avoid birds.

I accelerate and aim when i see rabbits.

B.A._Baracus

Speaking on animals and driving.

Me and the gf were walking through Talbot street yesterday. Saw a dead pigeon on the road. Of course, just as we were walking past it a bus ran out it... all you could hear was this loud "pop"

flanders1979

I've hit a couple of dogs . The second one was in front of the owner who denied it was his dog as he thought it damaged my car(it didnt). He said it was a stray that had been following him even though I seen it jumping out of the back of his pickup. I hope the dirty rotten inbred looking bollox gets what is coming to him.

Canard

Once saw a pigeon with no head in town somewhere when I was going for an eyetest, I would have been 8 or 9. It was kinda cool at the time but so disgusting when I think about it. :pac:

mauzo

I was on the luas a few months ago and it sounded like it ran over a bottle!

The luas stopped, the driver got out.....it was a dog

Pottler

syndeyfife wrote: »

I was on the luas a few months ago and it sounded like it ran over a bottle!

The luas stopped, the driver got out.....it was a dog

Does a Luass usually stop when the driver thinks he hit a bottle? I'd say around O'Connell st he'd be in and out like a stamp lickers tongue.

mauzo

Pottler wrote: »

Does a Luass usually stop when the driver thinks he hit a bottle? I'd say around O'Connell st he'd be in and out like a stamp lickers tongue.

He obviously saw the dog before he hit it, to the passengers it just sounded like a plastic bottle being crushed!!!

Pottler

There ye go, another thing learnt. I thought they got it hard to notice they'd hit a double decker bus, never mind a dog.:D

dodderangler

Plenty of rabbits and a pigeon
Put em straight into the boot of the car and gave them to the ferrets and hawk

Pottler

dodderangler wrote: »

Plenty of rabbits and a pigeon
Put em straight into the boot of the car and gave them to the ferrets and hawk

Why do you keep a hawk and some ferrets in your car boot? Do they get along? It must be an Octavia, loads of room there for a Hawk to fly around in.

Cienciano

Sky King wrote: »

OK rough story, so dont read if you like animals.

Note: I actually like animals a lot (especially ducks) and so I feel particularly bad about this.

Anyway I was calling out to my mate's house and slowed down when i saw traffic on the other side of the road stopping and building up in a tailback. I didn't know why so I kept driving at a slower speed.

Then I noticed a mammy duck and a line of baby ducks behind her crossing the road. The splitter under my bumper took down the mammy and the front tyre crushed a few of the babies. I felt the crunch through the steering column and the flapping of feathers as I passed over the mammy duck, which i saw in my rear view mirror was still alive albiet paralysed as she was flapping on the road with the baby ducks unable to get up. The babies were milling around her and their crushed siblings, they didn't know what to do (they're ducks, remember).

I was going to get out and finish off the mother duck with my boot when I notice that a group of about 4 children and a couple of adults who had been watching the duck cross the road had witnessed the gruesome and macabre scene unfold and now were in a state of shock and distress. The kids were crying and stuff. So I elected to drop a cog and high-tail it out of there.

Like I said, i like animals and feel bad about this so lay off alright!

You should have killed the rest of the baby ducks. They'll grow up and avenge their families death. They'll be ready to strike when you least expect it

dodderangler

Obviously when I got home
But yes ferrets will sit in boot and the hawk rides up front on the passenger seat I just take off the headrest and she sits on the top of the seat
Also yes they do get along they hunt together
Atb

Pottler

The duck of death!:D The young ones go quackers when you kill their mommy. All jokes aside, I'd feel crap if I hit a duck, I'm fond of them, they brighten the place up.

Pottler

dodderangler wrote: »

Obviously when I got home
But yes ferrets will sit in boot and the hawk rides up front on the passenger seat I just take off the headrest and she sits on the top of the seat
Also yes they do get along they hunt together
Atb

Sorry auld son, but I dislike you immediately. Ferrets and a Hawk? So, you get your kicks from sending a ferret down a burrow to kill the rabbits inside and a Hawk up to snag any "game" on the ground? Go catch them with your bare hands if you like killing stuff so much. I do not like people who keep ferrets, dogs for fighting, dogs for baiting or coursing. Bunch of cnuts in my opinion and yep, I'd say it to your face. I catch them sneaking around on my farm and take great pleasure in turning the tables. I get whole gangs of poachers arriving down en mass to go over a forest I own-10-20 lads, jeeps, lamps, dogs, the works. Luckily, I am a right old fecker and we soon reach an arrangement. They go act the cnut somwhere else. No smiles either, I've seen the handiwork up close often enough and I reckon there's somthing lacking to get a kick out of it.

dodderangler

Pottler wrote: »

dodderangler wrote: »

Obviously when I got home
But yes ferrets will sit in boot and the hawk rides up front on the passenger seat I just take off the headrest and she sits on the top of the seat
Also yes they do get along they hunt together
Atb

Sorry auld son, but I dislike you immediately. Ferrets and a Hawk? So, you get your kicks from sending a ferret down a burrow to kill the rabbits inside and a Hawk up to snag any "game" on the ground? Go catch them with your bare hands if you like killing stuff so much. I do not like people who keep ferrets, dogs for fighting, dogs for baiting or coursing. Bunch of cnuts in my opinion and yep, I'd say it to your face. I catch them sneaking around on my farm and take great pleasure in turning the tables. I get whole gangs of poachers arriving down en mass to go over a forest I own-10-20 lads, jeeps, lamps, dogs, the works. Luckily, I am a right old fecker and we soon reach an arrangement. They go act the cnut somwhere else. No smiles either, I've seen the handiwork up close often enough and I reckon there's somthing lacking to get a kick out of it.

If it helps majority of the time I do kill them by hand if the ferrets dont kill it or the hawk first time il just kill it with my bear hands
Nothin against ya 'pal'
Your entitled to your own opinion as is everyone else
But remember its up to me whether I choose to give a flying fcuk bout your opinion
Atb

dodderangler

Also I wouldn't go onto land that I didn't have permission on
I hate them cnuts just as much as you do
Big difference between hunting and poaching tho

kenmc

driving home from achill one day with my windsurfing kit on the roof, a woodpigeon flies out of the hedge right in front of me, hits the bonnet, the windsurfing board, the windscreen, the board, the roof, the board, the roof, the board..... eventually made it out the back in a heap of feathers. when I got home there was a grey goo smeared on the roofbars and bits of the board.

hit some other birds and a pheasant also.

in China was cycling along a wee road between a river and some fields and there were thousands of frogs hopping across the road, as far as I could see. it sounded like popcorn as I cycled through. tried to avoid them but impossible.

gammygils

My brother was driving us home one night years ago really late
Me asleep in passenger seat. We hit a badger. Jesus the bang!
Woke me up. So we got out and were poking & kicking the badger.
Not a stir out of him. So we examined the damage to the car.
Bumper was mangled. A metal bumper. Number plate was milled.
So anyways we turned around and the badger was gone!!!

Pottler

gammygils wrote: »

My brother was driving us home one night years ago really late
Me asleep in passenger seat. We hit a badger. Jesus the bang!
Woke me up. So we got out and were poking & kicking the badger.
Not a stir out of him. So we examined the damage to the car.
Bumper was mangled. A metal bumper. Number plate was milled.
So anyways we turned around and the badger was gone!!!

Be very careful. Badgers are notorious for holding a grudge. It's in a monastery high in the Andes as we speak, recuperating and practising martial arts, soon to return to exact a terrible revenge. That or it used its last breath to drag its butt into the ditch.

LETHAL LADY

Has anybody said squeal like a pig?

Pottler

LETHAL LADY wrote: »

Has anybody said squeal like a pig?

Slike the old joke, farm labourer rings the boss, "boss, I hit a pig with the jeep, what will I do???" Boss goes" just throw the carcass into the ditch and check the jeep for damage". Labourer rings back five minutes later-"Ok Boss, I did that, what'll I do with his motorbike?"

kildare.17hmr

My da hit a deer about 10 years ago, it had 4 broken legs when we got out. Knife in the glove box accross the gugular sorted him out and we had a full freezer the following day!

gammygils

Pottler wrote: »

Be very careful. Badgers are notorious for holding a grudge. It's in a monastery high in the Andes as we speak, recuperating and practising martial arts, soon to return to exact a terrible revenge. That or it used its last breath to drag its butt into the ditch.

That happened in 1988 in a '82 Corolla when bumpers were metal

I think we're safe enough now! I'm not looking over my shoulder anymore!

gammygils

Alas but it has happened. After 28 years driving I had my 1st roadkill
incident & there was nothing I could do.
Someones' poor unfortunate cat ran out in front of me last night. I braked hard. He stopped. So I accelerated. Then I heard 2 bumps.
Oh Dear! Oh Dear! Felt gutted