Hilarious misconceptions you or your friends had

fasttalkerchat

shooter57 wrote: »

I Just spotted this thread now . Funny the things we used to think . here's two of mine .

I used to think when it was your birthday , when you were in bed asleep God would lift you up and stretch you so that you got taller !


The other thing i used to think was that people used to go up in a helicoptor to God to find out the weather forecast !

I can't believe the amount of God related stories! From age 4 I didn't believe in God. I told my mum and she said not to say that and that you should believe. So I thought this was a secret and people who believed in God didn't know the truth and we shouldn't tell them yet.... It wasn't until about age 10 that I found out that religion had been going on for millennia and that the point at which we could tell people that god isn't real would never come!

hairyprincess

I used to wonder why a helicopter that was just hovering in the sky, not moving, wouldn't turn it's propellers off! To my mind it wasn't moving so it didn't need them!

BobbyPropane

fasttalkerchat wrote: »

I can't believe the amount of God related stories! From age 4 I didn't believe in God. I told my mum and she said not to say that and that you should believe. So I thought this was a secret and people who believed in God didn't know the truth and we shouldn't tell them yet.... It wasn't until about age 10 that I found out that religion had been going on for millennia and that the point at which we could tell people that god isn't real would never come!

There's always one who will start getting annoyed by stories that mention God.

fasttalkerchat

BobbyPropane wrote: »

There's always one who will start getting annoyed by stories that mention God.

Eh?

MerryLegs

Hazys wrote: »

Just learned something new :eek::cool::D:rolleyes::o:(


Another farm related miscinception i used to have was that a Goat was a male sheep and sheep were female sheep.

Just like a Bull is a male cow and cow is a female cow.

There almost like different breeds lol ponies are just smaller in height, the height a foal grows to depends on what size the parents were and breed etc

bp1989

Up until the age of 13/14, I had never heard the world 'circumcision' before. One day I heard someone mention the word at school, and so decided to look it up in a dictionary. The definition obviously said something along the lines of removing the foreskin.

I'd always thought the foreskin was your top layer of skin, and that circumcision meant removing it at birth.

For months afterwards, whenever the word was brought up, I'd picture a crying baby with its skin removed.

When I eventually found out what a foreskin was a year or so later, I began to wonder why I hadn't looked that up in a dictionary, too...

1ZRed

Squ wrote: »

My cousin thought that two men having sex automatically got aids..

Ah in fairness, so did I!

MerryLegs

Lisha wrote: »

horses and ponies are two different species....who knew:D

Am feeling a bit bad after reading about parents giving kids slightly inaccurate information about how babies get out............My 4.75 yr old boy asked me the other night how he as a baby got out of me, as he was a c-section baby, I said doctor cut and took you out. Not a lie I was very impressed with myself.....But now I have visions of him writing a a similar type thread in yrs to come:o btw he looked shocked and said I just thought you coughed me out

Whatever way I read that I thought you said 'my 75 year old boy asked me...' LOL

Squ

1ZRed wrote: »

Squ wrote: »

My cousin thought that two men having sex automatically got aids..

Ah in fairness, so did I!

Dave?

Curlyhatescurls

Until I was 17 I thought that tigers were female lions and that lions were male tigers.

I also thought that Russia was a continent.

Every few months I say something and my friends turn around shocked, cue a revelation on my part...

about 3 fity

up intil 2 weeks ago i thought banoffee pie was flavoured with banana and coffee, never knew how anyone could like that combination

bleepp

Used to think (until recently enough) that "approximately" meant exactly or dead on target...but it's the opposite :rolleyes:

One mate thought the same so I felt less thick:cool:

komodosp

My sister had a few when she was young. Off the top of my head...

- Alabama is in Texas - because she met a few Alabamans with "southern" American accents. And she would be the first to slag Americans for their bad geographic knowledge.
- The X-Files was true.

GunRunner

Until I was about ten I thought that Virginia was another word for vagina. I remember seeing a book in the school library with Virginia in the title and being shocked.

I thought you could get pregnant from sharing a bed with someone. Once, aged seven, I had a nightmare and so stayed on my mothers bed and For ages afterwardsI was terrified incase i was pregnant.


In fourth class we were long to learn about the Easter Rising. Our teacher asked if anyone knew what it was. One boy jumped up and said that he knew. The teacher asked him what he knew about it and he replyed "it's when Jesus rose from the dead"

In third year a girl in my class started ranting to me about how the IRA were horrible to kill the Black and Tans during the War Of Independence. I said that they deserved it. She looked shocked and said "I didn't think you were racist". Turns out that she thought that the IRA were a white supremist organisation that killed black people and people who had a tan.

jimmycrackcorm

Growing up I believed that when you got married then you lived happily ever after.
I also grew up believing in Hell.

Now that I am married, Guess which turned out true...

BobbyPropane

jimmycrackcorm wrote: »

Growing up I believed that when you got married then you lived happily ever after.
I also grew up believing in Hell.

Now that I am married, Guess which turned out true...

Getting married is hell?

u_c_thesecond

i saw a film when i was younger and there was a sex scene where the man fried eggs on the womans stomach during sex- for years i thought thats what happened and always wondered who had to provide the eggs:D

at night whenever i saw a plane in the sky with its light blinking id think it was santa keeping an eye on me and id start roaring out "well santa":p

yet another one here who thought a blow job involved blowing on the willy:o

And (this is mortifying) i only learned in the last 2 years that woman pee and poo out of 2 diff holes. i thought the vagina was for sex and giving birth- and the ass was for weeing and crapping. I didnt know women actually have 3 holes down there- and im a ****ing woman... oh the shame!!!:(:(:(

ViveLaVie

u_c_thesecond wrote: »

i saw a film when i was younger and there was a sex scene where the man fried eggs on the womans stomach during sex- for years i thought thats what happened and always wondered who had to provide the eggs:D

Was this Naked Gun?

u_c_thesecond

ViveLaVie wrote: »

Was this Naked Gun?

might have been that not sure i know it was ment to be a comedy anyway.

thought of 2 more.

Whenever there was a break in the clouds and those rays of sun would shine down in the distance i always thought that was god carrying souls to heaven

when i was about 10 i was CONVINCED i was the only real person in the world and that everything and everyone around me was like a show, and that when i left a room people changed clothes for next act (Odd that i had pretty much thought of the plot of the film "the truman show" before it came out)

Oh and i thought The White House was in Dublin

ViveLaVie

u_c_thesecond wrote: »

when i was about 10 i was CONVINCED i was the only real person in the world and that everything and everyone around me was like a show, and that when i left a room people changed clothes for next act (Odd that i had pretty much thought of the plot of the film "the truman show" before it came out)

I was convinced everyone else was either a witch or an alien. I used to think my family's heads weren't real and that they'd take their 'masks' off when I was in bed and there'd be only giant green scaly stuff underneath. I used to run downstairs trying to catch them out.

I also thought my life was The Truman Show. Oddly enough I hadn't seen the film either but I was convinced everyone could see me all the time. I also thought people could read my thoughts and spent weeks training myself not to think anything suspect or embarrassing.

I thought my teddies were alive and used to move around and dance when I left the room. Used to spend hours lining them up on my bed and then waiting outside and bursting into the room screaming 'CAUGHT!'. I'd persuade myself they had moved position slightly but they'd been too quick on their feet. Obviously they wouldn't move and I'd be trying to convince them to give the game up, saying I knew they were real. Sigh.

leggo

u_c_thesecond wrote: »

And (this is mortifying) i only learned in the last 2 years that woman pee and poo out of 2 diff holes. i thought the vagina was for sex and giving birth- and the ass was for weeing and crapping. I didnt know women actually have 3 holes down there- and im a ****ing woman... oh the shame!!!:(:(:(

Genuine question, since I'm a man so have obviously never experienced this, but...

H-how did you not realise that you weren't pissing out of your arse???

u_c_thesecond

leggo wrote: »

Genuine question, since I'm a man so have obviously never experienced this, but...

H-how did you not realise that you weren't pissing out of your arse???

i have no idea honestly, always figured it came out a certian angle so it didnt wet ur arse

im cringing here:o

1ZRed

girl in the striped socks wrote: »

Me & my friends thought that gay people were gay because no one else wanted them so they had to find a girlfriend/ boyfriend of the same sex.

No you were spot on there

whirlpool

ViveLaVie wrote: »

u_c_thesecond wrote: »

i saw a film when i was younger and there was a sex scene where the man fried eggs on the womans stomach during sex- for years i thought thats what happened and always wondered who had to provide the eggs:D

Was this Naked Gun?

Hot Shots.

This thread has me crying with laughter.

Duddy

"Fair Plate of you!" was one.


I also thought people on TV lived inside the TV, one day my brother was trying to fix something at the back of it and I said "Can you see the people?!?", to which he replied "WHAT?:pac:" and I very quietly said "nothing..."


I was convinced or quite a while that Leitrim was below Kildare, and Kildare was below Dublin (I'm from Donegal btw).


My friend's brothers convinced her she was a hologram and she didn't actually exist:pac:

StupidLikeAFox

Similar to others here, that when you died you would be shown a video tape of your life with everybody around you, a "This is Your Life" type scenario. I suppose you never know, I could be right yet!

sunflower27

notsobusy wrote: »

Omg I laughed so much when I read this!!!

I used to believe people when they told me you could dig down to Australia, many an afternoon I spent digging holes in the garden.

I grew up in Australia and believed we could dig to China! I remember thinking it would scare the hell out of me if I did actually dig too far and fell through.

Temporary Dub

u_c_thesecond wrote: »

leggo wrote: »

Genuine question, since I'm a man so have obviously never experienced this, but...

H-how did you not realise that you weren't pissing out of your arse???

i have no idea honestly, always figured it came out a certian angle so it didnt wet ur arse

im cringing here:o

Ya learn something new every day!

aodhan2

gas thread..
3 things i thought were true

all asian people had straight pubic hair..no idea where i got that from

Belfast was a county (never really listened in geography!)

Women stuck tampax to there legs with the sticky bits not there underwear..( I was at least 27 when i found out the truth )

daithieoghan

My friend had some of the greatest
1. At the Cold face
2. We convinced her that the crematorium for the Munster area was in Ovens in Cork ( info she passed on to work mates at a meeting when she was 30)

battleaxe88

I only found out a few years ago that the Liffey divided north and south Dublin.

Squ

aodhan2 wrote: »

all asian people had straight pubic hair.

they dont?

clarbar

Squ wrote: »

they dont?

ah yes they do have straight pubes haha I know

fasttalkerchat

I didn't think this myself but have heard it a few times:
At mass when you shake hands, people say "Pleased to meet you"

shopaholic01

aodhan2 wrote: »

gas thread..
3 things i thought were true

all asian people had straight pubic hair..no idea where i got that from

Belfast was a county (never really listened in geography!)

Women stuck tampax to there legs with the sticky bits not there underwear..( I was at least 27 when i found out the truth )

Eh.........tampons don't have sticky bits.......they're not stuck to underwear either.

fasttalkerchat

shopaholic01 wrote: »

Eh.........tampons don't have sticky bits.......they're not stuck to underwear either.

I think he means the pads. They do stick to underwear, right?



Also what is the correct name for them? I only learned recently that they're not tampons... im assuming that fanny pads isn't the real name.

shopaholic01

fasttalkerchat wrote: »

I think he means the pads. They do stick to underwear, right?



Also what is the correct name for them? I only learned recently that they're not tampons... im assuming that fanny pads isn't the real name.

Sanitary towels.

mauzo

I convinced my friend, who was 18 at the time...that hours in America are only 40 minutes long. Had her going for ages with that one. Told her that's why my parents go to America for 3 weeks because its pretty much only 2 weeks :P

In biology class the teacher asked us to name an animal now extinct that was native to Ireland, my friend said polar bear.

Same friend, in dundrum shopping centre, out at the pond there is a big rock wall type thing and you can look down into it. I told her that's where they are putting the dolphins, she believed me But I couldn't keep a straight face so she knew. I then told her not to be stupid, its for the gorillas. I honestly see her have a quick peek whenever we walk past. I know she's waiting for the day she sees gorillas. I've loads more on this one friend, I'll have to think.

about 3 fity

have a friend who was chattin up 2 americans on holiday i think around paddys day last year. he had them convinced that theres no tuesdays in ireland and that he had no clue what a microwave was, the 2 women completly fell for it an he and another fella pulled the 2 of them. god love them 2 women

aodhan2

shopaholic01 wrote: »

aodhan2 wrote: »

gas thread..
3 things i thought were true

all asian people had straight pubic hair..no idea where i got that from

Belfast was a county (never really listened in geography!)

Women stuck tampax to there legs with the sticky bits not there underwear..( I was at least 27 when i found out the truth )

Eh.........tampons don't have sticky bits.......they're not stuck to underwear either.

Oh god..on a thread where we are admitting old misconceptions of things , im still getting it wrong ! Ha . So someone double bluffed me with false info !

Mr Benevolent

aodhan2 wrote: »

Oh god..on a thread where we are admitting old misconceptions of things , im still getting it wrong ! Ha . So someone double bluffed me with false info !

No you didn't, the other poster got confused. The Tampax brand do have sticky bits. Tampons, on the other have, don't have sticky bits because they're inserted.

Voice of the Ages

When I was a little kid, I was told that thunder was the sound of God dropping something.

So much for an omnipotent and perfect being, dropping stuff everywhere.

mauzo

Confab wrote: »

aodhan2 wrote: »

Oh god..on a thread where we are admitting old misconceptions of things , im still getting it wrong ! Ha . So someone double bluffed me with false info !

No you didn't, the other poster got confused. The Tampax brand do have sticky bits. Tampons, on the other have, don't have sticky bits because they're inserted.

No? Sanitary towels are sticky on one side. Tampons are never sticky.

Now for the love of god Google it and stop talking about it!!

1ZRed

syndeyfife wrote: »

I convinced my friend, who was 18 at the time...that hours in America are only 40 minutes long. Had her going for ages with that one. Told her that's why my parents go to America for 3 weeks because its pretty much only 2 weeks :P

In biology class the teacher asked us to name an animal now extinct that was native to Ireland, my friend said polar bear.

Same friend, in dundrum shopping centre, out at the pond there is a big rock wall type thing and you can look down into it. I told her that's where they are putting the dolphins, she believed me But I couldn't keep a straight face so she knew. I then told her not to be stupid, its for the gorillas. I honestly see her have a quick peek whenever we walk past. I know she's waiting for the day she sees gorillas. I've loads more on this one friend, I'll have to think.

She's something alright and I thought my friend who asked in 6th year if black people had hair was bad!

kincsem

Woman in work said "It's a vicious circus"

Shankly Gates

Two gems I came out with that the lads like to constantly remind me of:

"Tiger's are female lions."

"The thing I never understood in Sonic is why they all ate chili dogs, who wants to eat a cold hot dog?"

mauzo

Oh I forgot the best one!

Standing in McDonald's and my friend was giving out to me for ejaculating with my hands. She's really loud as well. I was in stitches laughing and asked her was she giving out that I talk with my hands a lot?
She says yeah, you always ejaculate with your hands!
The guy in front turned around and told her she means gesticulate

Cathyht

...and the third little pig built his house with some mints.

So I thought when I was 4.

LoonyLovegood

That if you didn't sleep at night, the sandman turned you into sand.

calnand

I used to believe we were all descended from two people, but then I heard about this Darwin fellow.