How do I start to move on

gonebeyondajoke

I was in a loving relationship 4 years and it had it's ups and downs, a few months ago she ended it and although some of her reasons were legitimate alot were unreasonable. The thing is we broke up before and after a lot of souls searching I trusted her again and she broke my heart the same way. I have come to terms with it alot easier this time and I feel better and want to meet new people but I don't know how to begin to get back out there, my confidence isn't great because of the breakup and as a result I'm shy. Can anyone give me some advice I would really appreciate it

Hardonraging

gonebeyondajoke wrote: »

I was in a loving relationship 4 years and it had it's ups and downs, a few months ago she ended it and although some of her reasons were legitimate alot were unreasonable. The thing is we broke up before and after a lot of souls searching I trusted her again and she broke my heart the same way. I have come to terms with it alot easier this time and I feel better and want to meet new people but I don't know how to begin to get back out there, my confidence isn't great because of the breakup and as a result I'm shy. Can anyone give me some advice I would really appreciate it

I think everybody goes through this after a break up so first off dont feel as if you are alone out there.
There's no point in rushing back into something, and inevitably hurting somebody else, and you're self along the way, take some time out, enjoy the new found free time you have, go visit friends, take a holiday, etc ..

After a while you're confidence will reappear, and you'll start to open up a little again, why not go out with friends for a drink, or lunch, etc ..

Generally speaking, when you are not looking to meet somebody you will.

Ellsbells

It's only been a few months and your confidence is low after the break up so what's the rush into a new relationship??

gonebeyondajoke

thanks for the advice guys

TBH its not a relationship i'm looking for it's just meeting some new people i'm not looking for anything serious

Hardonraging

gonebeyondajoke wrote: »

thanks for the advice guys

TBH its not a relationship i'm looking for it's just meeting some new people i'm not looking for anything serious

You could attempt Online dating, however be warned it's a tough aspect of dating, perhaps look at some of the meet up website's that organise walk's or events..

gonebeyondajoke

I have an urge to do something new an exciting, partly because of the breakup mentioned above and partly because of the very recent sudden death of a friend (she was 23 and died of cancer) this has spurred me to move on from the breakup because life is to precious and short to dwell on the past. I want to try a new experience to start this change, does anyone have any suggestions?

Thanks for all the help so far

Vicxas

Dont do anything too extreme, but id say if you've ever wanted to do something like travel now would be the time. Most people wallow in self pity and dont do anything when they break up, so you're attitude is very positive.

Do what you want to do and then you can come back and see if you're ready to be in a relationship again.

gonebeyondajoke

thanks for all the advice guys but in the end PI'm still not over her

found out last night she has been, lying to me all along, she dumped me dragged me along saying she wasn't ready to talk and now I found out she dumped me to get with a guy who looks just like me

i feel lower than i have felt in my life right now, the pain is unbelievable and I don't think I will ever really get over it fully this time because she has done this twice now. I was an idiot to trust her again, now all 'our' friends are her friends and there is is this new guy that looks like me sitting in the life I used to have. I gave her everything and she just threw it all away and made me disposable.

The worst part is part of me still loves her.

Now I am a cliche, I am focusing on my career but even that seems pointless because I still feel alone and with nobody to talk to