Things that drive you insane

God...

maxfresh wrote: »

Tie a knot near the end of the string so it wont fit through the hole

Hindsight is 20/20... its to late to do that when you're stuck with your pants around your knees.

The King of Moo

ukonline wrote: »

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Common people drive me insane.

I took my wife to the Paddy's Day parade
this year and they were fkucking everywhere.

I actually had a panic attack and had to
escape to the nearest side street to watch
the rest of the parade.

If I go to town, they're everywhere too. Sidewalks,
banks, bars, in cars.....there's no exscape.

I'm God's only man.



-

ukonline wrote: »

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Sometimes, for kicks, I'll just stop walking and
they have to give way. Some people look shocked
that they've had to walk around me, others actually
apologise and give way.

I have this theory that attractive women are the worst,
as maybe they're used to people jumping out of their way...

...so I target them in particular.



-

Poems that don't rhyme.

sweeney1971

People not pricing goods up in shops and when you ask for the price they look down their noses at you.
Old people driving all over the roads at 10mph whilst using their Dorio phones.
Centra Advert thats been running for over a year.

JustAThought

People, often scobies, who shove their buggies in front of your 40mph moving car to " give" them a chance to cross the road when their light is RED & mine Is green.
Pushing a wheelchair around for the rest of your life & having to explain it to your child will be a LOT more inconvenient than the two minute wait.

People who slag off Ryanair. Remember when an Apex flight , if you were lucky enough to get one,rather than the standard £600 fare, was 260 old PUNTS if you needed to come home from emigration in London for a wedding/funeral etc. Rock on e1 flights & charges & taxes ; ) Europe awaits!!!

Dole cheats.

Smokers.

risteard7

x-factor
Cheryl cole
All them on the only way is essex tripe
Danny o'donoghue (script)
Brian mc fadden
Jessie j
Peter andre
Christine bleakley
Tulisia
George hook
John drennan
Jedward
Me

CommanderC

People who put heaps of effort into dressing and fashioning themselves into the style of someone who has put very little effort into dressing and fashioning themselves.

People who spoil their kids and turn them into little obnoxious ****s.

People who have seriously low self esteem and are mean to others because of it.

Ted_YNWA

Reading this thread is proof indeed that some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them..

The subject matter, not the posters ..... obviously

Shryke

Dean09 wrote: »

I saw a woman last week who had a piece of a cardboard box sellotaped to her back window and she scribbled "baby on board" on it in black marker!
Seriously who gives a fúck!

Because it will encourage people to cop on and not take risky maneuvers and the like around a car that has a baby in it? I think they are close to sensible considering how poor some people are driving around. People speeding and taking over in dodgy spots and getting aggressive when others slow down in order to take care if there is bad weather like heavy rain..
They are harmless signs and new borns are fragile and obviously fairly precious to new parents. It doesn't take a genius. Or half a genius. Or someone with half the amount of cop on necessary to function as a proper human being to understand.

FTA69

Vohnsom Hofmee wrote: »

-People who can't stand the noise of children crying. I just moved back home from America with my wife and two kids, people over there generally didn't give a **** about children crying or screaming. Over here? You get every head turning around having a good old look and stares at you, as if you're abusing your child or something. "Ahhh, what's wrong with the baba, I bet it's hungry..." No, we just fed our "baba" before we left the house, the "baba" actually has a serious case of being a fcuking "baba", and "babas" sometime cry for no reason. It's a child crying, not nails on a chalkboard.

-People who say "baba" instead of "baby".

What? Of course people can't stand the sound of babies crying, it's one of the mot ear-splitting and irritating sounds ever. Do you honestly expect people on a bus or in a restaurant to be perfectly content with some child bawling at the top of their lungs? I'll tell you what p*sses me off, people who take a superior attitude and think the rest of the world has to tolerate loud disturbances just because they belched some squalling brat out of their flaps.

Vinta81

Attempting to talk whilst eating.

People who walk out of a room and leave the door open.

GaryIrv93

People on the Internet who mean ''their'' but constantly spell it as ''there''

Mr Benevolent

GaryIrv93 wrote: »

People on the Internet who mean ''their'' but constantly spell it as ''there''

That's there problem.

Bowlardo

feckers taking ages to take out money at an ATM that they have been waiting 5 minutes for.You put in the card- type you pin- press the amount and press continue at max this takes 25 seconds .why is it taking you three minutes.

cartell_best

Things that drive you insane? Just finding out that someone you love dearly (who's sober btw) that lives 90km's away is having a really bad time and you know its serious when they contact you out of the blue. But, you've had a few beers and you're at the stage whereas you feel helpless because hopping into a car will create even more heartache, and just pray that you can sober up enough before tomorrow morning, to be where that person that needs you most is..

Bowlardo

Vinta81 wrote: »

Attempting to talk whilst eating.
in a previous job i saw people do this over the phone....so you are getting the sound effects of them munching literlally in your ear

Ficheall

Well, now we know why there are so many insane people in AH...

SusieBlue

People who get pissy when kids cry or misbehave, forgetting that they were once a child themselves.

leonidas83

people that leave skidmarks in my jacks, especially chicks

monkeysnapper

Lando Griffin wrote: »

When your waiting at the till in Aldi and there is one teller letting the queue grow and grow. You finally get to the belt and ready to place your goods on it when another till opens with a cry of "Next over here please"
Although you are ahead of others all those behind rush over and take there place.
There you are last in two queues then.:mad:
Really gets my goat up so much that when its my turn and the teller is half way through the messages and asks "Cash or Laser" I reply "I dont know yet until I see the total":cool:

I work in aldi , and i love doing this to people' i ussually look to see who looks the most irritating and i wait till they just put their goods on the belt ' then i say " im opening till number 3 "

Another thing i like to do is wait till someone puts their goods on belt then inform them im closed sorry' can you go to till number 1 ' " sorry about that". Ha ha yeh right ' sucker!!!!

Look i didnt get a proper education' i have to get some kind of enjoyment out of my work .

leonidas83

monkeysnapper wrote: »

I work in aldi , and i love doing this to people' i ussually look to see who looks the most irritating and i wait till they just put their goods on the belt ' then i say " im opening till number 3 "

Another thing i like to do is wait till someone puts their goods on belt then inform them im closed sorry' can you go to till number 1 ' " sorry about that". Ha ha yeh right ' sucker!!!!

Look i didnt get a proper education' i have to get some kind of enjoyment out of my work .

i bet your into some form of sado masochism aswell yah?

Vinta81

Bowlardo wrote: »

Vinta81 wrote: »

Attempting to talk whilst eating.
in a previous job i saw people do this over the phone....so you are getting the sound effects of them munching literlally in your ear

So rude. That would honestly irritate me more!

lookitsme

when your fart has follow through,

Wacker The Attacker

badly folded newspapers drive me f*cking insane

Wacker The Attacker

GaryIrv93 wrote: »

People on the Internet who mean ''their'' but constantly spell it as ''there''

They're awful

Same As

In a shop, pay for items, put my hand out for my change, change put on counter instead.

Last time I checked I didn't have leprosy.

It wasn't me!

Shryke wrote: »

Because it will encourage people to cop on and not take risky maneuvers and the like around a car that has a baby in it? I think they are close to sensible considering how poor some people are driving around. People speeding and taking over in dodgy spots and getting aggressive when others slow down in order to take care if there is bad weather like heavy rain..
They are harmless signs and new borns are fragile and obviously fairly precious to new parents. It doesn't take a genius. Or half a genius. Or someone with half the amount of cop on necessary to function as a proper human being to understand.

To be honest, anyone who drives in such a way that the warning makes a wet fart's worth of difference needs to be put off the roads anyway. What, they're going to be perfectly happy to endanger the other car's occupants provided there's not an infant there? Realistically, it doesn't make any damn difference, because whether there's a baby involved is not going to be a determining factor for anyone to whom the warning is applicable.

El Guapo!

Shryke wrote: »

Because it will encourage people to cop on and not take risky maneuvers and the like around a car that has a baby in it? I think they are close to sensible considering how poor some people are driving around. People speeding and taking over in dodgy spots and getting aggressive when others slow down in order to take care if there is bad weather like heavy rain..
They are harmless signs and new borns are fragile and obviously fairly precious to new parents. It doesn't take a genius. Or half a genius. Or someone with half the amount of cop on necessary to function as a proper human being to understand.

What a load of bollox.

It wasn't me! wrote: »

To be honest, anyone who drives in such a way that the warning makes a wet fart's worth of difference needs to be put off the roads anyway. What, they're going to be perfectly happy to endanger the other car's occupants provided there's not an infant there? Realistically, it doesn't make any damn difference, because whether there's a baby involved is not going to be a determining factor for anyone to whom the warning is applicable.

This.

If I was a crazy driver, which I am not, a little cardboard sign in a car window isn't gonna make me slow down or drive more carefully. It's not like people are going around playing real-life destruction derby and smashing into cars for the laugh,...and then all of a sudden they see a car that says "Little Princess on board" (or some shíte like that), and they immediately drive safer. It's purely an aesthetic product that people get roped into buying. It serves no purpose in my opinion.

Ciderswigger

Same As wrote: »

In a shop, pay for items, put my hand out for my change, change put on counter instead.

Hate that!!!! :mad: Then you've to scrape the change off the counter while everyone waits behind you.

crinklestein

I thought proper baby on board signs were there to alert the emergency services to the presence of an infant in case of a crash?

confuseddotcom

I.S.P's that you do pay every month but only get a shoddy service in return.

Annoying self-service tills with repeated messages to remove yer bags etc. while yer trying to scan stuff.

Shop Assistants walking around asking can they help you un-necessarily / excessively, yet when ya actually do need help; - ya either can't find anyone to ask, or they bluntly tell ya they don''t know themselves! :rolleyes:

Tail-gaters.

Cars with blue lights. Seriously? Blue? Shure ye might as well host a car-disco and while ye're at it, send a few oncoming cars into the ditch from having no choice but to be staring into those blue yokes ye call lights which are in no ways similar to the standard car-lights i.m.o.

Motorists not yielding right-of-way and / or not even pausing never mind stopping and looking before they bull-doze drive straight through their 12 o' clock exit at a roundabout, or motorists who indicate AFTER yes after! they feicing turn!

Oncoming Lorries who think they own the road and assume it's okay to drive on your side as well as their own? Da fuq? Slow down and pull up until the car has gone by like if yer not gonna make it passed them without nearly colliding with them. :rolleyes:

Certain folk on the Dole who give genuine folk on the Dole a bad name.

Loved-up couples taking over foot-paths thinking folk walking behind have nothing else for doing with their time but looking at them in their loved-up-bliss. Ohhhh, look at us!!! Yeah, everyone is looking at ye!! Now get outta the way or move along please and thanks.


/deep breath

dalta5billion

The guy doing voiceovers for RTE during the Olympics.

"There are 12 live streams, compatible with all devices, ..."

I want to hit him BAMM right in the nose.

And Marty Morrissey's "I'm a sexy GAA bachelor who wears fake tan" ego. Makes me want to puke.

mikehunts

dalta5billion wrote: »

The guy doing voiceovers for RTE during the Olympics.

"There are 12 live streams, compatible with all devices, ..."

I want to hit him BAMM right in the nose.

And Marty Morrissey's "I'm a sexy GAA bachelor who wears fake tan" ego. Makes me want to puke.

Kenny Egan's accent makes me want to find the remote and either turn over or smash it quick.

Vohnsom Hofmee

FTA69 wrote: »

What? Of course people can't stand the sound of babies crying, it's one of the mot ear-splitting and irritating sounds ever. Do you honestly expect people on a bus or in a restaurant to be perfectly content with some child bawling at the top of their lungs? I'll tell you what p*sses me off, people who take a superior attitude and think the rest of the world has to tolerate loud disturbances just because they belched some squalling brat out of their flaps.

You misunderstood, and have the ugly attitude of "shut that fcuking kid up".

If a baby is crying, and it's been fed, changed, and not tired, why is it crying? Guess what? Babies NEED to cry and scream, and if my child needs to do it out in public, he/she is going to, and I dare anyone to say or do something about it.

I was also talking about children from toddlers ages onwards, that have Autism, Apraxia, etc., these children are sometimes going to scream their lungs out, sometimes for no reason. It is difficult to deal with, but what doesn't help is people staring, asking "What's wrong with that child?", trying to give them sweets to shut them up, or thinking they're a "squalling brat". Mind your own fcuking business.

Lando Griffin

monkeysnapper wrote: »

Lando Griffin wrote: »

When your waiting at the till in Aldi and there is one teller letting the queue grow and grow. You finally get to the belt and ready to place your goods on it when another till opens with a cry of "Next over here please"
Although you are ahead of others all those behind rush over and take there place.
There you are last in two queues then.:mad:
Really gets my goat up so much that when its my turn and the teller is half way through the messages and asks "Cash or Laser" I reply "I dont know yet until I see the total":cool:

I work in aldi , and i love doing this to people' i ussually look to see who looks the most irritating and i wait till they just put their goods on the belt ' then i say " im opening till number 3 "

Another thing i like to do is wait till someone puts their goods on belt then inform them im closed sorry' can you go to till number 1 ' " sorry about that". Ha ha yeh right ' sucker!!!!

Look i didnt get a proper education' i have to get some kind of enjoyment out of my work .

What are your opening hours today? And is Sunday the last day of the 48 hour shift?

Lando Griffin

Shryke wrote: »

Dean09 wrote: »

I saw a woman last week who had a piece of a cardboard box sellotaped to her back window and she scribbled "baby on board" on it in black marker!
Seriously who gives a fúck!

Because it will encourage people to cop on and not take risky maneuvers and the like around a car that has a baby in it? I think they are close to sensible considering how poor some people are driving around. People speeding and taking over in dodgy spots and getting aggressive when others slow down in order to take care if there is bad weather like heavy rain..
They are harmless signs and new borns are fragile and obviously fairly precious to new parents. It doesn't take a genius. Or half a genius. Or someone with half the amount of cop on necessary to function as a proper human being to understand.

Most cases iv seen id where the car with the sticker is the most reckless selfish drives as if the sticker gives them some rite of passage to do anything they like.

Armaghmagic

To do with driving (surprise surprise)

- People on Mobile Phones

- People who don't use indicators

- People in flashy jeeps who think they are the only people on the road.

Post edited as one of my bulletpoints was directed at a certain race of people and thought better of it.

monkeysnapper

Lando Griffin wrote: »

What are your opening hours today? And is Sunday the last day of the 48 hour shift?

10am - 7pm

There is no 48 hr shift , the 72 hour shift superseeded it, there was a memo that came in on morse code about 2 weeks ago from head office .

ruthloss

Items that won't scan at the Self Service Till at Supermarkets.
(usually veg and bread)

stampydmonkey

Speed ****ing cameras on perfectly safe wide carriageways, with plenty of forward visibility and low accident records, clearly just trawling for revenue.

also when they are located on the lucan bypass with its ridiculas speed limit

abouttobebanned

People who steal lines from comedians like billy Connolly and pass the humour off as their own. It's all over this thread.

monkeysnapper

stampydmonkey wrote: »

Speed ****ing cameras on perfectly safe wide carriageways, with plenty of forward visibility and low accident records, clearly just trawling for revenue.

also when they are located on the lucan bypass with its ridiculas speed limit

I thought they only put speed cameras in a place where somebody had died on that area of road??

Pompey Magnus

In an argument:

Person A: "Calm down mate"
Person B: "I'm not your mate!"

No matter the background to the argument I will invariably judge Person B to be a knob simply for using that wankerish line.

Kur4mA

People who get to the end of an escalator/travellators and just stop because they either forgot where they're supposed to be going, don't know the way or are just thick as sheite. You're forced to start trying to go BACK a few steps and nearly causing an accident. I had to grab some dumb biddys trolley once and move it because she was so dumbstruck at the fact I was telling her she was blocking the way for the queue trying to get off the travellator thing.

Same thing with people who stop at the entrance/exit of a shop forcing everyone to start walking into each other.

It's gotten to the stage where I will pretty much rugby tackle these idiots.

Gummy Panda

Vohnsom Hofmee wrote: »

If a baby is crying, and it's been fed, changed, and not tired, why is it crying? Guess what? Babies NEED to cry and scream, and if my child needs to do it out in public, he/she is going to, and I dare anyone to say or do something about it.

Why? What would you do?

jessiejam

Gummy Panda wrote: »

Why? What would you do?

Fight fight fight fight...



*gets popcorn

SimonTemplar

- People blowing cigarette smoke on the street - no consideration for others

- In cinemas, people talking, rustling loud bags, kicking seats, causing light polution with their phone, answering their phones (!). Just sit down, shut up and watch the movie

- Complete strangers who come into a movie late and asks you if they missed anything. It only happened to me about 3 times in the last four years. The most recent time was during Grabbers a few days ago - this muppet strolls in 30 minutes into the movie (which is a full 50 mins after the advertised time if you include ads), pops his head across my field of vision and asks the question. He actually missed alot, but I said he didn't. Hope he was highly confused.

- Scumbags who smoke on public transport

- People in the fashion industry who think their job is as important as doctors, teachers etc... How deluded can you be!

- Materialistic people who place the acquisition of expensive branded objects as a major priority in life, especially when they start talking s**t about "how awful the situation in Africa is".

- Anyone who is rude or demeaning to retail staff because they think they are superior to them, ESPECIALLY if they use the phrase "I pay your wages".

- The phrase "I'm not a racist but..."

- Anyone who thinks homosexuality is evil or an illness or can be "cured"

- Adam Sandler

Wacker The Attacker

Every time you sit at a bus shelter, the only other person there nearly always blocks your view of the oncoming buses forcing you to stand up or move

all sorts of drivers
they make me very cross

people who walk all over the footpath... slowly
can't pass by them on either side because they wander in that direction the second you start trying and then nearly shove you into the wall

shockwave

Shop assistants who chat away to each other completely ignoring you as you stand there waiting to be served.

Pumpkinseeds

Idiots who travel in convoys around every street in the town beeping there car horns constantly, with fecking kids hanging out of the car windows and sunroofs. I don't give a s**t what match your kids have just won and and most of the community doesn't giving a flying f**k either, if we were interested in the result we'd ask you.

I think its completely irresponsible, half arsed parenting to have a kid sitting half out the car window waving a football jersey from a moving car. What the f**k do you think is going to happpen to the kid if you have to break suddenly? Bloody fools.

It shows no consideration at all for the rest of the community, it was bad enough when it only happened in the afternoon, but now you're at it at 9pm. What about the other people in the community like the following, who also live in the community?

People who are terminally ill?
People who have just been bereaved?
People holding a wake or who have just attended the funeral of their child or spouse?

Have a bit of cop on and f**K off with your kids, they're only of primary school age, how fecking important can the match have been.

Don't bother rattling your collection tin at me in the supermarket either.